If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Topless Robot) Cool Weapons of Mass Destruction: Science Fiction edition   (toplessrobot.com) divider line 204
More: Cool, tasmanian devil, marvin the martian, Spaceballs, collateral damage, tactical nuclear weapon, fleet, WMDs, wombats  
•       •       •

7970 clicks; posted to Geek » on 06 Dec 2011 at 1:47 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



204 Comments   (+0 »)
   

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Last | Show all
 
2011-12-06 10:46:19 AM
4.bp.blogspot.com

Conspicuously absent.
 
2011-12-06 10:51:15 AM
RexTalionis: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 640x484]

Conspicuously absent.


Weapons, not doomsday devices.

Little Doctor is missing.
 
2011-12-06 10:52:29 AM
"We'll beam aboard and stop it."
"You can't."

So not only did Kirk's gay son (NTTAWWT) use proto-matter when he made Genesis, he didn't put a CANCEL button on it.
 
2011-12-06 10:58:15 AM
GAT_00: RexTalionis: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 640x484]

Conspicuously absent.

Weapons, not doomsday devices.

Little Doctor is missing.


From the episode in question:

SPOCK: She was attacked by what appears to be essentially a robot, an automated weapon of immense size and power. Its apparent function is to smash planets to rubble and then digest the debris for fuel. It is, therefore, self-sustaining as long as there are planetary bodies for it to feed on.

...

MCCOY: This whole thing's incredible. A robot? A machine like that, who would build it?
KIRK: We don't know. An alien race, apparently from another galaxy.
MCCOY: But why?
KIRK: Bones, did you ever hear of a doomsday machine?
MCCOY: No. I'm a doctor, not a mechanic.
KIRK: It's a weapon built primarily as a bluff. It's never meant to be used. So strong, it could destroy both sides in a war. Something like the old H-Bomb was supposed to be. That's what I think this is. A doomsday machine that somebody used in a war uncounted years ago. They don't exist anymore, but the machine is still destroying.
 
2011-12-06 11:04:20 AM
I'd like to add...

picture.funnycorner.net
 
2011-12-06 11:21:10 AM
RexTalionis: KIRK: It's a weapon built primarily as a bluff. It's never meant to be used. So strong, it could destroy both sides in a war. Something like the old H-Bomb was supposed to be. That's what I think this is. A doomsday machine that somebody used in a war uncounted years ago. They don't exist anymore, but the machine is still destroying.

That thing killed the Borg (and Janeway) in Before Dishonor. IT WAS AWESOME.
 
2011-12-06 11:22:07 AM
Halo, oh, he means Ringworld.
 
2011-12-06 11:23:11 AM
2wolves: Halo, oh, he means Ringworld.

Except Ringworld wasn't a weapon. Or maybe it was, but I haven't read all the recent Ringworld books.
 
2011-12-06 11:32:45 AM
GAT_00: 2wolves: Halo, oh, he means Ringworld.

Except Ringworld wasn't a weapon. Or maybe it was, but I haven't read all the recent Ringworld books.


Shadow Squares used magnetic fields to make the star lase. So yes.
 
2011-12-06 11:44:13 AM
GAT_00: 2wolves: Halo, oh, he means Ringworld.

Except Ringworld wasn't a weapon. Or maybe it was, but I haven't read all the recent Ringworld books.


And Ringworld encircled a star. The Halos are just ring-shaped space stations orbiting various planets.
 
2011-12-06 12:03:34 PM
Puts nerd hat on. The least unfeasible weapon is the Shadow Planet Killer, because it doesn't require an unreasonable amout of power.
 
2011-12-06 12:05:58 PM
No James Bond references? I suppose that would take up most of the list.
 
2011-12-06 12:20:24 PM
images.wikia.com

Activate the Photonic Cannon!
 
2011-12-06 12:28:03 PM
ArkAngel: [images.wikia.com image 300x366]

Activate the Photonic Cannon!


Where the hell are the pips? That was the best part.
 
2011-12-06 01:32:48 PM
www.jumpnow.de
 
2011-12-06 01:38:41 PM
simplicimus: Puts nerd hat on. The least unfeasible weapon is the Shadow Planet Killer, because it doesn't require an unreasonable amout of power.

As far as planet killing goes, all of these fancy pants schemes still won't work as well as a couple thousand cubic meters of iron slamming into a planet at 0.75c. Cheap, crude, effective. The shotgun of planet killing.
 
2011-12-06 01:44:58 PM
Jubeebee: simplicimus: Puts nerd hat on. The least unfeasible weapon is the Shadow Planet Killer, because it doesn't require an unreasonable amout of power.

As far as planet killing goes, all of these fancy pants schemes still won't work as well as a couple thousand cubic meters of iron slamming into a planet at 0.75c. Cheap, crude, effective. The shotgun of planet killing.


The Centauri mass drivers seemed efficient, though not planet killers.
 
2011-12-06 01:45:54 PM
farm8.staticflickr.com
 
2011-12-06 01:47:06 PM
simplicimus: The Centauri mass drivers seemed efficient, though not planet killers.

Glad this was covered.

And although the planet would not be turned into rumble if they keep firing they'll kill everything on the planet.
 
2011-12-06 01:52:52 PM
List fails without chaytrif.

/Harpanet would be a good Fark handle
//So would Thuktun Flishiathy except for the filter-pwnage...
 
2011-12-06 01:53:59 PM
simplicimus: The Centauri mass drivers seemed efficient, though not planet killers.

Well, different purposes.

[Bablyon 5 Spoilers start here]

The Centauri needed the Narn populace and the planet's resources (well, wanted, anyway...)

Neither the Shadows nor the Vorlons particularly needed any *particular* race, even though they obviously played favorites. If they didn't need you and you were allied with "the other side", wiping out the whole planet (given the immense resources and technological advancement of those two races) is much less time consuming.

I still think, though, that even accounting for as underrated as Babylon 5 is as an influential TV series in the US, the scene of Londo standing on the observation deck of the Centauri ship, watching as his off-handed wish to Morden is carried out to it's fruition is an iconic scene in modern sci-fi.

[Bablyon 5 Spoilers end here]
 
2011-12-06 01:58:10 PM
Iain M Banks; The Algebraist -

Picking a fight with a species as widespread, long-lived, irascible and - when it suited them - single-minded as the Dwellers too often meant that just when - or even geological ages after when - you thought that the dust had long since settled, bygones were bygones and any unfortunate disputes were all ancient history, a small planet appeared without warning in your home system, accompanied by a fleet of moons, themselves surrounded with multitudes of asteroid-sized chunks, each of those riding cocooned in a fuzzy shell made up of untold numbers of decently hefty rocks, every one of them travelling surrounded by a large landslide's worth of still smaller rocks and pebbles, the whole ghastly collection travelling at so close to the speed of light that the amount of warning even an especially wary and observant species would have generally amounted to just about sufficient time to gasp the local equivalent of 'What the fu--?' before they disappeared in an impressive if wasteful blaze of radiation.

/I can't recommend the Culture series enough
 
2011-12-06 01:59:19 PM
mark.jms: Iain M Banks; The Algebraist -


/I can't recommend the Culture series enough


Even though that's not a part of the Culture series :)

/ftfm
 
2011-12-06 01:59:45 PM
Species 8472 feels left out.
 
2011-12-06 02:04:59 PM
What about turning a useful tool into a weapon of mass destruction? I'd vote guiding an asteroid into a Mass Relay and obliterating an entire solar system to be a good option.
 
2011-12-06 02:05:37 PM
Mugato: "We'll beam aboard and stop it."
"You can't."

So not only did Kirk's gay son (NTTAWWT) use proto-matter when he made Genesis, he didn't put a CANCEL button on it.


I always thought the solution would have been to keep hitting the Reliant with torpedoes until its warp core f*cking exploded, taking the Genesis Device with it.

But that's why I'm not a writer for Star Trek.
 
2011-12-06 02:06:05 PM
Of course, the whole point of a Doomsday Machine is lost, if you keep it a secret!
 
2011-12-06 02:07:21 PM
Conspicuously absent:

lh3.ggpht.com
 
2011-12-06 02:12:15 PM
Ohhh and it may have been campy (just like the first one), but the Q-Bomb in Starship Troopers 3 should definitely count. It's a planet cracker bomb and is used to destory a bug that had basically burrowed and grown into a quarter of the planet.
 
2011-12-06 02:18:03 PM
scottydoesntknow: Starship Troopers 3

Why are you even watching that?
 
2011-12-06 02:19:23 PM
FuturePastNow: I always thought the solution would have been to keep hitting the Reliant with torpedoes until its warp core f*cking exploded, taking the Genesis Device with it.

But that's why I'm not a writer for Star Trek.


My rationalization was that they were close enough that a warp core breach would also have destroyed the Enterprise, seeing as they had no shields (since they were still in the nebula).
 
2011-12-06 02:23:12 PM
Lensman Kinnison once lased an entire star system...
 
2011-12-06 02:24:57 PM
No "Little Doctor" from Ender's Game? Seems that one should have been listed.
 
2011-12-06 02:28:36 PM
Knara: FuturePastNow: I always thought the solution would have been to keep hitting the Reliant with torpedoes until its warp core f*cking exploded, taking the Genesis Device with it.

But that's why I'm not a writer for Star Trek.

My rationalization was that they were close enough that a warp core breach would also have destroyed the Enterprise, seeing as they had no shields (since they were still in the nebula).


Perhaps. I'd think a couple of minutes at full impulse would get them far enough away, though. Then again, I'm not a starship captain.
 
2011-12-06 02:29:43 PM
Explosive space modulator.
 
2011-12-06 02:30:08 PM
This, recruits, is a 20-kilo ferrous slug. Feel the weight. Every five seconds, the main gun of an Everest-class dreadnought accelerates 1 to 1.3 percent of light speed. It impacts with the force of a 38-kiloton bomb. That is three times the yield of the city-buster dropped on Hiroshima back on Earth. That means Sir Isaac Newton is the deadliest son-of-a-biatch in space. Now, Serviceman Burnside! What is Newton's First Law?

- Sir! An object in motion stays in motion, sir!

No credit for partial answers, maggot!

- Sir! Unless acted on by an outside force, sir!

Damn straight! I dare to assume you ignorant jackasses know that space is empty. Once you fire this hunk of metal, it keeps going till it hits something. That can be a ship, or the planet behind that ship. It might go off into deep space and hit somebody else in ten thousand years! If you pull the trigger on this, you are ruining someone's day, somewhere and sometime. That is why you check your damn targets! That is why you wait for the computer to give you a firing solution! That is why, Serviceman Chung, we do not "eyeball it!" This is a weapon of mass destruction. You are not a cowboy shooting from the hip!

/That round has nothing on the weapons in the article, but that lecture was really amusing
 
2011-12-06 02:32:09 PM
No Wunderland Treatymaker? (ok, so it just left a huge canyon cut into the planet, not total destruction.)
 
2011-12-06 02:32:22 PM
Knara: FuturePastNow: I always thought the solution would have been to keep hitting the Reliant with torpedoes until its warp core f*cking exploded, taking the Genesis Device with it.

But that's why I'm not a writer for Star Trek.

My rationalization was that they were close enough that a warp core breach would also have destroyed the Enterprise, seeing as they had no shields (since they were still in the nebula).


Well, they had no targeting in the nebula, and you have to aim where the target will be at arrival, not where it is now.
 
2011-12-06 02:33:05 PM
FuturePastNow: Knara: FuturePastNow: I always thought the solution would have been to keep hitting the Reliant with torpedoes until its warp core f*cking exploded, taking the Genesis Device with it.

But that's why I'm not a writer for Star Trek.

My rationalization was that they were close enough that a warp core breach would also have destroyed the Enterprise, seeing as they had no shields (since they were still in the nebula).

Perhaps. I'd think a couple of minutes at full impulse would get them far enough away, though. Then again, I'm not a starship captain.


They were inside the nebula, the targeting systems on both ships were farked to all hell, and neither were very good at making a shot. They also explained in the movie, with dialogue and everything that the maximum speed the Enterprise was capable at that time would not have gotten them away in time (and they were trying anyways)
 
2011-12-06 02:33:06 PM
Glad I'm not the only one curious where the Little Doctor is. That's the first weapon I thought of, right before the Death Star.

/I think they just picked things that they could easily throw together pictures of
 
2011-12-06 02:35:50 PM
I am waiting for a Lensman movie.

"Lets throw planets at each other!"
 
2011-12-06 02:35:58 PM
mark.jms: Iain M Banks; The Algebraist -
/I can't recommend the Culture series enough


Actually in the Culture series is the destruction of the Orbital Vavatch in Consider Phlebas with energy weapons and compressed anti-matter.
 
2011-12-06 02:37:17 PM
The English Major:
That thing killed the Borg (and Janeway) in Before Dishonor. IT WAS AWESOME.


Google has failed me when searching out spoilers for this book.

What was that thing & how did it kill the Borg/Janeway?
 
2011-12-06 02:40:25 PM
Solarbenite (new window)

I remember this from when I was a kid. I think they said it was a way to detonate sunlight which would have some serious consequences.
 
2011-12-06 02:42:16 PM
FuturePastNow: Perhaps. I'd think a couple of minutes at full impulse would get them far enough away, though. Then again, I'm not a starship captain.

It's hard to say without having consistent stats in the ST universe on impulse power, but we can extrapolate that a warp core breach has a pretty large area effect, since it was enough to knock the fully-powered saucer section of the Enterprise-D out of orbit when it was attempting to get some distance under impulse power, and that's a ship design that was state of the art like 80 years after Star Trek 2.

I think it's feasible that the refitted original 1701 would have been toast, by comparison.

/also, folks, I think he's talking about *after* the Reliant was disabled and simply drifting, not during the actual battle itself
 
2011-12-06 02:45:27 PM
Conspicuously absent:

30.media.tumblr.com

/and hungry
//coward
 
2011-12-06 02:46:11 PM
Knara: FuturePastNow: Perhaps. I'd think a couple of minutes at full impulse would get them far enough away, though. Then again, I'm not a starship captain.

It's hard to say without having consistent stats in the ST universe on impulse power, but we can extrapolate that a warp core breach has a pretty large area effect, since it was enough to knock the fully-powered saucer section of the Enterprise-D out of orbit when it was attempting to get some distance under impulse power, and that's a ship design that was state of the art like 80 years after Star Trek 2.

I think it's feasible that the refitted original 1701 would have been toast, by comparison.

/also, folks, I think he's talking about *after* the Reliant was disabled and simply drifting, not during the actual battle itself


Also Enterprise was not capable of full impulse power, but a fraction of her best speed. A warp core breach would have destroyed her.
 
2011-12-06 02:48:03 PM
mark.jms: mark.jms: Iain M Banks; The Algebraist -


/I can't recommend the Culture series enough

Even though that's not a part of the Culture series :)

/ftfm


That book was bloody fantastic. So is the Culture series.
 
2011-12-06 02:49:39 PM
Snow Monkey: What was that thing & how did it kill the Borg/Janeway?

It's the Doomsday Machine/Planet Killer from the Original Series episode The Doomsday Machine. (new window)
 
2011-12-06 02:50:45 PM
Snow Monkey: The English Major:
That thing killed the Borg (and Janeway) in Before Dishonor. IT WAS AWESOME.

Google has failed me when searching out spoilers for this book.

What was that thing & how did it kill the Borg/Janeway?


Actually, that general concept was used previously in the TNG-era novel "Vendetta" where it was explained that the Doomsday Machine in TOS was actually a prototype for an actual Borg Hunter/Killer. A woman whose world was destroyed by the Borg finds the completed version in a spacedock constructed by the (now-extinct) race outside of the galactic rim and uses it to eliminate all traces of the Borg in the Alpha Quadrant, but then gets herself into some sort of warp/relativity issue trying to get to the Delta Quadrant and becomes "trapped in time" in some sort of Xeno's paradox condunruum born of her desire to get there and wipe out the Borg as fast as possible.

Not sure how that was reused in the Voyager scenario, though.
 
Displayed 50 of 204 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Last | Show all


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »