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(Mirror.co.uk) Interesting UK paper Daily MIrror opines that the US will likely hit Iran within two weeks with massive airstrikes. Then again, they also have a story titled "Two drivers still on road after eight drink-drive convictions EACH", so... let's see   (mirror.co.uk) divider line 64
More: Interesting, mirrors, Iran, Iran's Revolutionary Guard, Quds Force, launch vehicle, military strategy, spy planes, Religious Fanaticism  
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3506 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Dec 2011 at 3:13 AM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



64 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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b2theory [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 12:05:29 AM
What the heck was that? Someone was paid to produce such nonsense?
 
Tatsuma [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 02:02:45 AM
b2theory: What the heck was that? Someone was paid to produce such nonsense?

What do you mean? A lot of it seems to be spot on, though I don't know about that '2 week' timeline.
 
Knight of the Woeful Countenance
2011-12-05 03:21:49 AM
haven't we been two weeks away from striking Iran for two years now?
 
LDM90
2011-12-05 03:21:58 AM
Drink drive Drink drive Drink drive sticky wicket guvnah
 
thisispete
2011-12-05 03:24:31 AM
I'm sure the US has all sorts of military plans for an attack on Iran somewhere in the Pentagon. There's probably plans there to invade Antarctica if the emperor penguins get out of line too. But after Iraq, the evidence would have to be pretty certain and convince a sceptical public.

Israel would probably be happy to do it by proxy, but aside from air raids like the one they carried out against Iraq in 1981, I doubt they alone could project the kind of power needed to subdue Iran.
 
simplicimus [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 03:25:29 AM
Persia, huh? 300 soldiers should be enough to deal with them.
 
Happy Hours [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 03:27:02 AM
There really hasn't been enough rhetoric for us to strike Iran before Xmas.

Sure, I hate Iran as much as the next guy, but probably half of the kids in the US don't remember the Iran-hostage thingy.

/went to high school with an Iranian back around the time when it was common to see Mickey Mouse stickers that said "Hey Iran!" with Mickey giving the finger. He insisted he was Persian.

We knew what he was, but he was okay.
 
Point02GPA [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 03:29:07 AM
Well, The Sheik will be at his not-in-American home for a couple of weeks. A great time to hit his brothers in religion.
 
video man [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 03:29:27 AM
LDM90: Drink drive Drink drive Drink drive sticky wicket guvnah

Oy, change the telly with the smibbly bibbly, would yas? The ding-dong ticky-tocky says it's a smidgens past tea-time!
 
user1001
2011-12-05 03:31:25 AM
I'll just leave this here. Who Reads The Papers (new window)

May be NSFWish.
 
BolloxReader
2011-12-05 03:34:39 AM
Well, I was taught in elementary school that they drink only alcohol over there because everyone in Europe thinks that the water is going to kill them. So anyone driving would be drunk.

Also, I'm sure the UK is wanting us to go into Iran. We already overthrew the elected President of Iran for them once. Obviously, if Iran still has the social cohesion to actually pretend to be a united country they need to be knocked off their uppity horses again. Can't have them just randomly issuing photoshops all over the internet without reprisals.
 
Happy Hours [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 03:35:32 AM
user1001: I'll just leave this here. Who Reads The Papers (new window)

May be NSFWish.

Oh man, best show ever. Why don't they make it anymore? Too close to truth?
 
my herniated disc
2011-12-05 03:41:23 AM
Happy Hours: There really hasn't been enough rhetoric for us to strike Iran before Xmas.

Sure, I hate Iran as much as the next guy, but probably half of the kids in the US don't remember the Iran-hostage thingy.

/went to high school with an Iranian back around the time when it was common to see Mickey Mouse stickers that said "Hey Iran!" with Mickey giving the finger. He insisted he was Persian.

We knew what he was, but he was okay.

i wonder how many kids remember the 1953 us/uk sponsored coup that overthrew the popular democratically elected leader Mosaddegh only to replace him with a repressive shah.

stupid cold war.. stupid colonialism.. and now we all got to live with the stupid consequences
 
yagottabefarkinkiddinme
2011-12-05 03:42:57 AM
user1001:

: ) lol.
 
Tsar_Bomba1
2011-12-05 03:43:04 AM
thisispete: I'm sure the US has all sorts of military plans for an attack on Iran somewhere in the Pentagon. There's probably plans there to invade Antarctica if the emperor penguins get out of line too. But after Iraq, the evidence would have to be pretty certain and convince a sceptical public.

Israel would probably be happy to do it by proxy, but aside from air raids like the one they carried out against Iraq in 1981, I doubt they alone could project the kind of power needed to subdue Iran.



i279.photobucket.com
 
Point02GPA [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 03:45:56 AM
BolloxReader: Well, I was taught in elementary school that they drink only alcohol over there because everyone in Europe thinks that the water is going to kill them. So anyone driving would be drunk.

Also, I'm sure the UK is wanting us to go into Iran. We already overthrew the elected President of Iran for them once. Obviously, if Iran still has the social cohesion to actually pretend to be a united country they need to be knocked off their uppity horses again. Can't have them just randomly issuing photoshops all over the INTERNET without reprisals.

They have been droning on about stuff lately. I suggest posting all of the Iran email accounts on some Nigerian bulletin board.
 
my herniated disc
2011-12-05 03:49:12 AM
why the hell shouldnt iran be allowed to have nuclear weapons anyways.. Bush put Iran Iraq and Korea on the axis of evil. So far one out of the 3 has been invaded, one without nuclear weapons.

If I was Iran I would be scrambling to get nukes as well for self-defence deterence.

ugh what a disaster. seriously
 
Oznog
2011-12-05 03:54:05 AM
Knight of the Woeful Countenance: haven't we been two weeks away from striking Iran for two years now?

media.giantbomb.com

Two weeks.

28.media.tumblr.com

Two week. Two weeks! TWO WEEKS!!! TWOTWOTWOWEEEEKSSSS...
 
James F. Campbell
2011-12-05 03:57:33 AM
Well, ain't this place a geographical oddity! Two weeks from every airstrike!
 
Twitch Boy [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 03:57:36 AM
Does this mean gas is going to go up to $4 a gallon again?
 
BullBearMS
2011-12-05 04:03:31 AM
my herniated disc: why the hell shouldnt iran be allowed to have nuclear weapons anyways.. Bush put Iran Iraq and Korea on the axis of evil. So far one out of the 3 has been invaded, one without nuclear weapons.

If I was Iran I would be scrambling to get nukes as well for self-defence deterence.

ugh what a disaster. seriously

You're not the only person to have that thought.

The U.S. has long had Iran virtually encircled as a result of the American occupation of Afghanistan on Iran's Eastern border, its invasion of Iraq on its Western border, its NATO ally Turkey hovering on Iran's Northwestern border, some degree of military relationship with Turkmenistan on Iran's Northeastern border, and multiple U.S. client states sitting right across the Persian Gulf (Kuwait, Saudi Arabia, the UAE, and Bahrain, where the massive U.S. Fifth Fleet is stationed). Additionally, some combination of the U.S. and Israel has bombarded Iran with multiple acts of war over the last year, including explosions on Iranian soil, the murder of numerous Iranian nuclear scientists (in which even one of their wives was shot), and sophisticated cyberattacks. Meanwhile, top American political officials from both parties are actively demanding that an Iranian revolutionary cult be removed from the list of Terrorist organizations (just coincidentally, they're all on the cult's payroll). In the past decade, the U.S. and/or Israel have invaded, air attacked, and/or occupied Afghanistan, Iraq, Pakistan, Somalia, Yemen, Libya, Lebanon, Sudan, Syria, the West Bank and the Gaza Strip (to say nothing of the creation of a worldwide torture regime, a system of "black site" prisons around the world to which people were disappeared, and a due-process-free detention camp in the middle of the Caribbean Ocean where many people remain encaged for almost a full decade without charges). During this same time period, Iran has not invaded, occupied or air attacked anyone. Iran, to be sure, is domestically oppressive, but no more so - and in many cases less - than the multiple regimes funded, armed and otherwise propped up by the U.S. during this period. Those are all just facts.

But - despite all of these facts - all Serious people in the U.S. know that Iran is the Aggressor, the Modern Nazis, a True Menace, while the U.S. and Israel are its innocent peace-loving victims. Today, Iran claims that it took down an American drone flying over its country (either by shooting it down or overtaking its control system). Iran has made similar claims before, but this time the U.S. admits it last week lost a drone flying over what it claims was Western Afghanistan (not Eastern Iran). Between the intense wall of secrecy behind which the U.S. government operates and the less-than-reliable nature of the pronouncements from both governments, we'll likely never know what happened for sure. In any event, this is yet another case of increased tensions between the two nations, and it's thus time for yet another round of Those Evil, Provocative, Aggressive Iranians (because, of course, no peace-loving nation - such as the U.S. - would ever dare shoot down an Iranian drone if it flew over their soil; in fact, just imagine the massive retaliatory response that would be triggered if Iran were found to be flying drones over American soil, let alone simultaneously killing U.S. scientists, causing explosions on U.S. soil, backing U.S. Terrorist groups, and launching cyber attacks on U.S. nuclear facilities, all while occupying Canada and Mexico with more than 150,000 troops). In light of these belligerent U.S. actions and threats - along with seeing how the U.S. treats countries without a nuclear capability versus those who have one - nothing is more rational than Iran's wanting a nuclear weapon.
 
RidersOfLohan
2011-12-05 04:10:42 AM
farm8.staticflickr.com
 
Happy Hours [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 04:12:50 AM
my herniated disc: i wonder how many kids remember the 1953 us/uk sponsored coup that overthrew the popular democratically elected leader Mosaddegh only to replace him with a repressive shah.

stupid cold war.. stupid colonialism.. and now we all got to live with the stupid consequences

Interestingly enough my world history class glossed over that - or rather didn't mention it at all. In fact, it pretty much ended at WWII and I think we spent maybe a week to cover everything since.

But I have heard of what you're referencing, but isn't about farking time they get over it? We're friends with Japan which we nuked and Germany as well which we crushed. We're farking friends with Russia even if we don't always agree. We're even friends with Vietnam which is even more recent. I've heard rumors that we're even chummy with the Britsh who we had to kick out of our country.
 
miss diminutive
2011-12-05 04:17:28 AM
Well thanks, Daily Mirror. That attack was supposed to be a surprise.
 
mjl
2011-12-05 04:30:19 AM
Happy Hours: user1001: I'll just leave this here. Who Reads The Papers (Yes Minister link)
May be NSFWish.
Oh man, best show ever. Why don't they make it anymore? Too close to truth?

It was rather popular in the corridors of power. Aside fromNigel Hawthorne Paul Eddington being dead :-( I rather suspect that they stopped making them was they wanted to quit while they were ahead.

 
Your Silence is Killing Kurds
2011-12-05 05:04:56 AM
BullBearMS

would you support the overthrow of the Iranian regime by the people?
 
buckler [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 05:26:09 AM
LDM90: Drink drive Drink drive Drink drive sticky wicket guvnah

Tot Mom Drink Drive Tot Mom Drink Drive Tot Mom Drink Drive...kinda like the sound of that.
 
Albino Squid
2011-12-05 05:30:34 AM

But I have heard of what you're referencing, but isn't about farking time they get over it? We're friends with Japan which we nuked and Germany as well which we crushed. We're farking friends with Russia even if we don't always agree. We're even friends with Vietnam which is even more recent. I've heard rumors that we're even chummy with the Britsh who we had to kick out of our country.

Well, the restored rule of Mohammad Reza Pahlavi was supported by the US, UK and others right up 'til 1979, when they overthrew him. Then once expelled, the US and UK began doing all manner of things to incite a counter-revolution or diminishing of the regime, including the arming of Iraq for an exceedingly bloody nine-year war against Iran, and various murmurs of war in the intervening decades.

Therein lies the problem: it's easier to get past problems with a nation when it no longer harbours intentions (justified or otherwise) of blowing you up. It's harder when those external forces remain an ongoing threat, both to the regime and to the state at large. Despite that, a large chunk of Iran's population no longer hates the United States, or Britain, or their allies...launch airstrikes, and it's a safe bet that it'll take at least another generation for them to "get over it". There's really no better way to prop up the regime than to prove correct the actors within Iran that have spent the past thirty years warning that America is out to destroy the country.
 
BullBearMS
2011-12-05 05:34:44 AM
Your Silence is Killing Kurds: would you support the overthrow of the Iranian regime by the people?

Sure, but what does that have to do with the current attacks from Isreal and the US on Iran?
 
You'd turn it off when I was halfway across
2011-12-05 05:45:59 AM
mjl: Happy Hours: user1001: I'll just leave this here. Who Reads The Papers (Yes Minister link)
May be NSFWish.
Oh man, best show ever. Why don't they make it anymore? Too close to truth?

It was rather popular in the corridors of power. Aside fromNigel Hawthorne Paul Eddington being dead :-( I rather suspect that they stopped making them was they wanted to quit while they were ahead.

Although there is a stage version, from the original writers, currently on in London.
 
cats4rent
2011-12-05 05:54:51 AM
they might destroy themselves playing with their own nuclear weapons.
 
spoony_pandora
2011-12-05 05:57:09 AM
The government of Iran will get over it around the same time the US government normalizes relations with Cuba.
 
Your Silence is Killing Kurds
2011-12-05 06:02:20 AM
BullBearMS


Your Silence is Killing Kurds: would you support the overthrow of the Iranian regime by the people?

Sure, but what does that have to do with the current attacks from Isreal and the US on Iran?



quite a lot, I would think. how do you see the power struggle between khamenei and ahmadinejad playing out?
 
Gdalescrboz
2011-12-05 06:04:22 AM
BullBearMS 2011-12-05 05:34:44 AM

Your Silence is Killing Kurds: would you support the overthrow of the Iranian regime by the people?

Sure, but what does that have to do with the current attacks from Isreal and the US on Iran?

Why does no one ever mention Iran killing thousands of American troops in Iraq and Afghanistan? It is an undeniable fact that Iran has built and provided insurgents(Iranian special forces were even caught in the act) with EFPs that have accounted for the vast majority of American combat deaths.
I understand why they did it, they want an unstable Iraq/Afghanistan so they can expand control of the region, its understandable. But why they thought they could do it at the expense of the US is anyones guess, their leadership isn't exactly known as being discrete. Everything that is happening with their nuclear program should come as no surprise to anyone. They poked the US in the eye a few to many times and this is the result
 
Liquid lunch
2011-12-05 06:10:34 AM
miss diminutive: Well thanks, Daily Mirror. That attack was supposed to be a surprise.

If a story in the Mirror turns out to be true it will certainly be a surprise.
 
BullBearMS
2011-12-05 06:10:44 AM
Your Silence is Killing Kurds: Sure, but what does that have to do with the current attacks from Isreal and the US on Iran?

quite a lot

That doesn't answer my question. What do the current attacks on Iran from the US and Israel have to do with Iranians throwing off their own government?
 
BullBearMS
2011-12-05 06:17:51 AM
Gdalescrboz: Why does no one ever mention Iran killing thousands of American troops in Iraq and Afghanistan?

Are you saying only we are allowed to invade Iran's neighbors and start killing people there?
 
hughcs
2011-12-05 06:18:26 AM
The new moon is December 24th.
We Own The Night.
Just sayin'.
 
Your Silence is Killing Kurds
2011-12-05 06:21:19 AM
BullBearMS

That doesn't answer my question. What do the current attacks on Iran from the US and Israel have to do with Iranians throwing off their own government?

well, your question was kinda stupid, wasn't it? that is to say that, if the west hopes for internal change, it should be pretty obvious that the west's policy towards Iran will reflect the desire to see a sufficiently motivated internal movement gain the necessary support and momentum
 
BullBearMS
2011-12-05 06:26:03 AM
Your Silence is Killing Kurds: BullBearMS

That doesn't answer my question. What do the current attacks on Iran from the US and Israel have to do with Iranians throwing off their own government?

well, your question was kinda stupid, wasn't it? that is to say that, if the west hopes for internal change, it should be pretty obvious that the west's policy towards Iran will reflect the desire to see a sufficiently motivated internal movement gain the necessary support and momentum

So you're basically just trying to distract attention away from the fact that the US has decided to go after another nation that just so happens to be sitting on top of a metric buttload of oil, then.

I suppose you would be cool with another nation invading us, killing our people, and overthrowing our government?
 
Jamieboy
2011-12-05 06:26:40 AM
Happy Hours: There really hasn't been enough rhetoric for us to strike Iran before Xmas.

Sure, I hate Iran as much as the next guy, but probably half of the kids in the US don't remember the Iran-hostage thingy.

/went to high school with an Iranian back around the time when it was common to see Mickey Mouse stickers that said "Hey Iran!" with Mickey giving the finger. He insisted he was Persian.

We knew what he was, but he was okay.

I know several people whose families came from that part of the world. Their families fled from the Shah's regime long before the religious idiots took over. They all consider themselves being from "Persian" descent rather than "Iranian". "Iranian" is a very bad word to them. I don't really know the dynamics behind their views, it's something they don't talk about. But I can imagine if you were on the Shah's shait list for whatever reason, life couldn't have been very nice. That guy was a real nutter.
 
Your Silence is Killing Kurds
2011-12-05 06:45:38 AM
BullBearMS

So you're basically just trying to distract attention away from the fact that the US has decided to go after another nation that just so happens to be sitting on top of a metric buttload of oil, then.

you said you would support the overthrow of the regime by the people. that is - you said you would support that. when I suggest that current western policy is geared to supporting the same goal you claimed to support, you get pissed and start accusing me of distracting. what's that all about?

I suppose you would be cool with another nation invading us, killing our people, and overthrowing our government?

oh my. recall, you said you would support the overthrow of the regime by the people. that is what we are talking about - internal revolution (supported by you earlier).

/if you're too drunk to post any more, that's ok - have a little lie down
 
Fat-D
2011-12-05 06:53:38 AM
Internal revolution-good
US lead revolution-bad
Internal revolution supported by multinational air campaign... im okay with this.

$50 says Israel does it all by themselves by spring.
 
Gdalescrboz
2011-12-05 07:18:32 AM
BullBearMS 2011-12-05 06:17:51 AM

Gdalescrboz: Why does no one ever mention Iran killing thousands of American troops in Iraq and Afghanistan?

Are you saying only we are allowed to invade Iran's neighbors and start killing people there?

No, im saying that when you engage in war, things like, oh, having your nuclear scientists assassinated and sanctions put on you is the result. People on here wondering why the West is giving Iran the clamps are effing idiots. How can you not see it? Its farking obvious if you have been paying attention to anything besides Brittney Spears's haircut.
 
Frothy Panties
2011-12-05 07:44:17 AM
thisispete: I'm sure the US has all sorts of military plans for an attack on Iran somewhere in the Pentagon. There's probably plans there to invade Antarctica if the emperor penguins get out of line too. But after Iraq, the evidence would have to be pretty certain and convince a sceptical public.

Israel would probably be happy to do it by proxy, but aside from air raids like the one they carried out against Iraq in 1981, I doubt they alone could project the kind of power needed to subdue Iran.

I have seen this comment before....sense of deja vu.
 
Party Boy [TotalFark]
2011-12-05 07:54:03 AM

Hey, What happened to that Used Car Salesman? You know, This One

Used-car salesman as Iran proxy? Why assassination plot doesn't add up for experts. (CS Monitor)

The "very scary" Iranian Terror plot | The most difficult challenge in writing about the Iranian Terror Plot unveiled yesterday is to take it seriously enough to analyze it. (Salon)

Iran 'plot' raises unanswered questions (BBC)

Patrick Cockburn: This bizarre plot goes against all that is known of Iran's intelligence service (The Independent)

Ex-CIA warns US 'dangerously wrong' on Iran (ABC.AU)
You know, the plot that was presented by this AG?
Eric Holder Is Disqualified by the Marc Rich Pardon
Washington Post - December 2, 2008
Rich was a commodities trader who amassed both a fortune and some influential friends in the 1970s and '80s. Along with his partner, Pincus Green, he was indicted in 1983 on 65 counts of tax evasion and related matters. Before he could be prosecuted, however, he fled to Switzerland. There he remained, avoiding extradition and eventually arranging to be represented by Jack Quinn, a Washington lawyer and Clinton's onetime White House counsel -- in other words, a certified power broker. Quinn did an end run around the Justice Department's pardon office and went straight to Holder and the White House. With a stroke of a pen, justice was not done.
.
But the pardon cannot be excepted. It suggests that Holder, whatever his other qualifications, could not say no to power. The Rich pardon request had power written all over it -- the patronage of important Democratic fundraisers, for instance. Holder also said he was "really struck" by the backing of Rich by Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Barak and the possibility of "foreign policy benefits that would be reaped by granting the pardon." This is an odd standard for American justice, but more than that, what was Holder thinking? That U.S.-Israeli relations would suffer? Holder does not sound naive. He sounds disingenuous.

Eric Holder Is Disqualified by the Marc Rich Pardon
Washington Post - December 2, 2008
Rich was a commodities trader who amassed both a fortune and some influential friends in the 1970s and '80s. Along with his partner, Pincus Green, he was indicted in 1983 on 65 counts of tax evasion and related matters. Before he could be prosecuted, however, he fled to Switzerland. There he remained, avoiding extradition and eventually arranging to be represented by Jack Quinn, a Washington lawyer and Clinton's onetime White House counsel -- in other words, a certified power broker. Quinn did an end run around the Justice Department's pardon office and went straight to Holder and the White House. With a stroke of a pen, justice was not done.
.
But the pardon cannot be excepted. It suggests that Holder, whatever his other qualifications, could not say no to power. The Rich pardon request had power written all over it -- the patronage of important Democratic fundraisers, for instance. Holder also said he was "really struck" by the backing of Rich by Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Barak and the possibility of "foreign policy benefits that would be reaped by granting the pardon." This is an odd standard for American justice, but more than that, what was Holder thinking? That U.S.-Israeli relations would suffer? Holder does not sound naive. He sounds disingenuous.
 
cwolf20
2011-12-05 08:42:29 AM
Doubt it. The government chain of command is so convoluted right now, bombing would consist of someone telling a joke and sneezing before they could get to the punchline.
 
jakomo002
2011-12-05 08:49:13 AM
Israel will do it before all US troops are out of Iraq.

They need US troops to be close by because they need American troops to be attacked by the Iranians so they draw the US into the conflict.

Even if it takes attacking the US themselves and then pretending it was the Iranians. Israel needs direct US backing or it's severely limited (the Iraqis will not let the Israelis fly over their airspace for one).
 
This text is now purple
2011-12-05 09:07:45 AM
BullBearMS: So you're basically just trying to distract attention away from the fact that the US has decided to go after another nation that just so happens to be sitting on top of a metric buttload of oil, then.

I would think the oil thing would have gone away after the US took over Iraq, and didn't direct any more of it to the US than we normally got.
 
jakomo002
2011-12-05 09:12:32 AM
This text is now purple; I would think the oil thing would have gone away after the US took over Iraq, and didn't direct any more of it to the US than we normally got.

Probably less to do with the actual quantity of oil than having full unfettered access to the Strait of Hormuz, where something like 20% of the world's oil moves through.

Which makes attacking Iran pretty dangerous because they can probably shut it down completely within 5 mins.
 
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