FARK.com: (6785016) Johnny Depp has managed to piss off Christians with his new Christmas song. That's pretty hard to do

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		Johnny Depp has managed to piss off Christians with his new Christmas song. That's pretty hard to do (torontosun.com)		86
		More: Dumbass, Christmas song, Johnny Depp

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7740 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 03 Dec 2011 at 5:11 PM | Favorite | share:

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86 Comments (+0 »)

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TheManofPA

2011-12-03 05:13:11 PM

Is it a love song for Tim Allen?

Freschel

2011-12-03 05:18:53 PM

So it's a song about Drunk and Bitter Jesus?

Heh got it in before Ghastly.

SoxSweepAgain

2011-12-03 05:21:37 PM

FTFA: Lee Douglas of The Christian Coalition adds, "I'm sure he thinks he's being very funny but he's simply a disgrace. One day, Johnny Depp and his cronies will face the judgment of our Lord and they will burn in hell for this filth."

Bwahahaha. That shiat cracks me up every time.

SuburbanCowboy

2011-12-03 05:22:51 PM

I'm offended by Christmas Card from A Hooker in Minneapolis by Tom Waits! How dare he combine prostitution and our precious Holiday!

I'm also offended by Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer, and Santa Looked a Lot Like Daddy, and all of the South Park Christmas songs.

Sabyen91

2011-12-03 05:23:50 PM

They have the right to be offended and I have the right to not give a shiat.

Oh, and:

images5.cpcache.com

Dimensio

2011-12-03 05:26:12 PM

JasonOfOrillia

2011-12-03 05:28:18 PM

Babybird frontman Stephen Jones has brushed off the controversy, insisting, "Some people have no sense of humour."

And that's everything that needs to be said about those whiners.

Apos

2011-12-03 05:28:37 PM

Guess they won't be part of the Pirates Of The Caribbean VII: Booty Calls! audience. Not that Depp will care.

BurnShrike

2011-12-03 05:28:37 PM

One day, Johnny Depp and his cronies will face the judgment of our Lord and they will burn in hell for this filth.

"If you don't believe in the Boogey Monster, then the Boogey Monster will get you!"
"But I don't beli--"
"THE BOOGEY MONSTER!"

GungFu

2011-12-03 05:28:41 PM

As a fundamentalist Christian, I am appalled at the insensitivity of this song, and it being so close to the birthday of our Lord and Saviour and all.

Nobody makes fun of Jesus Christ on my watch!

Have I heard the song?

No. That's not the point. I read about the outrage on Fark and that's enough.

KatjaMouse

2011-12-03 05:29:26 PM

The Jesus Stag Night Club, which tells a story of a boozing Christ-like figure in a strip club.

What's the big deal? From what I recalled Jesus hung out with hookers and kept the wine flowing at parties all night.

LaViergeNoire

2011-12-03 05:33:12 PM

Seriously, if there is a God somewhere who evaluates human performance and metes out eternal recompense, is a silly Christmas song going to outweigh the sheer volume of money and time Johnny Depp has given to various causes? I hate that kind of stuff because you're supposed to follow the rules more than you're supposed to be good. It's ridiculous. Anyway.... This is the stuff he does that won't keep him out of "hell" apparently.... (new window)

CanisNoir

2011-12-03 05:33:45 PM

KatjaMouse: The Jesus Stag Night Club, which tells a story of a boozing Christ-like figure in a strip club.

What's the big deal? From what I recalled Jesus hung out with hookers and kept the wine flowing at parties all night.

BINGO! (no pun intended but I'll happily take credit for it) - I have no doubts that if Jesus was walking the Earth today he'd have a good laugh at it. Being able to laugh at yourself is par for the course with humble people and one thing Jesus preached it was humility. Some of these people who claim to represent Christianity could learn a lesson or two from their Savior.

/Like how to be a good Jew!
//BAM!

HawgWild

2011-12-03 05:36:28 PM

Screamin

2011-12-03 05:38:26 PM

Can't find it on any torrents, must not be that big.

KatjaMouse

2011-12-03 05:39:53 PM

LaViergeNoire: Seriously, if there is a God somewhere who evaluates human performance and metes out eternal recompense, is a silly Christmas song going to outweigh the sheer volume of money and time Johnny Depp has given to various causes? I hate that kind of stuff because you're supposed to follow the rules more than you're supposed to be good. It's ridiculous. Anyway.... This is the stuff he does that won't keep him out of "hell" apparently.... (new window)

St. Peter: Ok... according to this you've given $1,000 to a children's hospital and strong armed a corporation into matching your donation. You tip broke waiters... generously give to the homeless... everything looks to be in or-oh wait. Hmmm nope. Looks like you mocked the savior so you'll be taking that escalator over there. Enjoy eternal damnation.

KatjaMouse

2011-12-03 05:40:28 PM

$1,000 = 1,000,000

No one gives a rat's ass over a thou.

Kurmudgeon

2011-12-03 05:40:57 PM

Screamin: Can't find it on any torrents, must not be that big.

I'm just trying to figure out how to use the term "Christians" in my next link submission, it seems to be a successful tactic.

Sabyen91

2011-12-03 05:45:21 PM

Kurmudgeon: Screamin: Can't find it on any torrents, must not be that big.

I'm just trying to figure out how to use the term "Christians" in my next link submission, it seems to be a successful tactic.

Poor Christians.

Roto-Rot

2011-12-03 05:46:26 PM

It's almost 2012. Many people still believe 5000 +/- years' worth of assorted godman mythology.

/Osiris H. Christ

BurnShrike

2011-12-03 05:47:27 PM

Screamin: Can't find it on any torrents, must not be that big.

It'll get bigger the more Christians condemn it.

NeverDrunk23

2011-12-03 05:53:38 PM

BurnShrike: Screamin: Can't find it on any torrents, must not be that big.

It'll get bigger the more Christians condemn it.

yep. it will become more popular as they condemn it and rant and rave, giving it free advertising.

MisterLoki

2011-12-03 05:58:43 PM

Good.

Millennium

2011-12-03 05:59:38 PM

Where was this controversy when Santa Baby came out?

apoptotic

2011-12-03 06:06:48 PM

I'm surprised that the Sun's headline wasn't "Johnny Depp launches attack in War on Christmas".

scarmig

2011-12-03 06:26:47 PM

Dear Christians,

By the word of your own Bible, this is Satan's planet, not yours. You have to focus.

GleeUnit

2011-12-03 06:26:48 PM

Uh, it's actually really, really easy to piss off Christians. They get pissed off over, well, just about everything.

Marcus Aurelius

2011-12-03 06:37:47 PM

The invisible triple sky god is going to be VERY disappointed.

wookalar

2011-12-03 06:44:45 PM

All he has to do is give some purified waters to the hobo outside Megaton and he should be right as rain.

fusillade762

2011-12-03 06:45:26 PM

"I'm sure he thinks he's being very funny but he's simply a disgrace. One day, Johnny Depp and his cronies will face the judgment of our Lord and they will burn in hell for this filth."

Now back to the good part! (new window)

Poison

2011-12-03 06:45:34 PM

Outraged, I am, despite not having heard the song. Because the Bible tells me so.

Or it doesn't. I seem to recall it basically telling me to try and be a good person and live my life accordingly and not judge others. Except Johnny Depp.

hungry hungry cannibal

2011-12-03 06:50:24 PM

Mr. Lee of the Christian Coalition appears to have left out the part where he advises Johnny Depp to seek forgiveness. What kind of broke ass Christian does that?

henryhill

2011-12-03 06:56:58 PM

+1 for Johnny Depp

Labrat407

2011-12-03 07:05:31 PM

Pagan Orgies to Human Sacrifice: The Bizarre Origins of Christmas (new window)

Evilsmurf

2011-12-03 07:06:33 PM

video man

2011-12-03 07:11:17 PM

SoxSweepAgain: FTFA: Lee Douglas of The Christian Coalition adds, "I'm sure he thinks he's being very funny but he's simply a disgrace. One day, Johnny Depp and his cronies will face the judgment of our Lord and they will burn in hell for this filth."

Bwahahaha. That shiat cracks me up every time.

Glad you covered that. Nothing says 'Jesus' like "Hope you go to hell". Jesus hung out with lepers, prostitutes, and cast-outs. He went around and helped people, and gave good advice. I find it funny that people to claim to "follow" him do the EXACT OPPOSITE of what he says to do.

just passing through

2011-12-03 07:12:16 PM

I didn't even know he had any musical talent.

Farker Soze

2011-12-03 07:14:44 PM

Lee Douglas of The Christian Coalition adds, "I'm sure he thinks he's being very funny but he's simply a disgrace. One day, Johnny Depp and his cronies will face the judgment of our Lord and they will burn in hell for this filth."

Guy's head would asplode if he heard Hasa Diga Eebowai.

Mama's Boy

2011-12-03 07:16:22 PM

/Christian

MadAzza

2011-12-03 07:18:32 PM

GleeUnit: Uh, it's actually really, really easy to piss off Christians. They get pissed off over, well, just about everything.

Not most of them, I don't think. I'm not Christian, but the ones I've known have been pretty mellow. It's like any group -- it's mainly the extremists and freaks who get noticed.

Mama's Boy

2011-12-03 07:19:10 PM

Also I never would have known the song even existed if these religious fanatics wouldn't have made so much noise about it. Keep it in church with your chastity belts.

Evilsmurf

2011-12-03 07:22:02 PM

Lee Douglas of The Christian Coalition adds, "I'm sure he thinks he's being very funny but he's simply a disgrace. One day, Johnny Depp and his cronies will face the judgment of our Lord and they will burn in hell for this filth."

Let me try this again, the image was apparently too big, so click here.

MadAzza

2011-12-03 07:24:24 PM

fusillade762: "I'm sure he thinks he's being very funny but he's simply a disgrace. One day, Johnny Depp and his cronies will face the judgment of our Lord and they will burn in hell for this filth."

Now back to the good part! (new window)

Haaa! Thanks.

aearra

2011-12-03 07:39:42 PM

Fark the sun, its owners, publishers, and writers (if you can stretch your imagination enough to call them that). Good news is they are losing "readership" (if you can call the people that look at the pictures readers) to the freebee papers in Toronto. They have had to raise the price to stay economically viable beyond the level their "readers" can support.

FunkOut

2011-12-03 07:43:37 PM

Sometimes I think people are in a religion just because they like the "eternal judgement everyone else is wrong told you so" bit.

The Flexecutioner

2011-12-03 07:55:44 PM

Thanks, Christians. If you hadn't complained loudly enough an article wouldn't have been written about it, then linked to Fark, then ridiculed by many. It's free publicity like this that made me go look it up and enjoy. (okay, it didnt acrually make me.)

/score one for xtians

Get Lost

2011-12-03 07:56:45 PM

And this article is somehow considered 'news' to the people of Tonto,Kanaduh?

/Squze me whilst I go and desecrate something or another for the billionth time.
//I say we drop all the christians off in the Middle East and then let nature sort out this 'God' thingy.
///Difficulty index of: No weapons, other than the knives that were given at birth.

babysealclubber

2011-12-03 07:57:31 PM

Mama's Boy: "I'm sure he thinks he's being very funny but he's simply a disgrace. One day, Johnny Depp and his cronies will face the judgment of our Lord and they will burn in hell for this filth."

This is the face I see when I imagine some old "purist" screaming old timey shiat like this

[extraordinaryintelligence.com image 500x433]

/Christian

Leave Subby's mom out of this

Kurmudgeon

2011-12-03 08:11:53 PM

Sabyen91: Poor Christians.

Too obvious, been over done.

Old enough to know better

2011-12-03 08:15:31 PM

Haven't heard the song, but if it makes fundies foam at the mouth, I heartily endorse it.

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