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(ABC)   When using the Whizzinator, make sure it doesn't arouse suspicion by clinking against the plastic cup   (abclocal.go.com) divider line 264
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25644 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Oct 2003 at 9:19 AM (10 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2003-10-08 09:20:09 AM
Whizzinator also makes a model for women

Anyone else curious as to what this looks like?
 
2003-10-08 09:21:29 AM
Yeah, but it failed about as quick as the female condom, and for the same reason.

Turns out that women don't a have penis.
 
2003-10-08 09:22:48 AM
Like a dildo-watergun?
 
2003-10-08 09:23:20 AM
If you outlaw artificial penises that squirt fake pee, then only criminals will have artificial penises that squirt fake pee.
 
2003-10-08 09:25:56 AM
Hmm...does this thing keep the fake pee at the right temperature? I know they took the temperature of pee during my last employment pee test 5 years ago.
 
2003-10-08 09:31:54 AM
Yes, the substitution device does generate battery powered heat to simulate human body temps. There are so many ways around urine tests its ridiculous. Felons whizzing in front of police can be stripped. Employees of companies cannot. Clink away.

Survey the techs, also. Many of them do not report THC busts because they think its BS to ruin somebody's employment over some MJ. Drug testing is an industry, people, and we've somehow let ourselves be subject to a clear invasion of privacy. Gattaca, here we come!
 
2003-10-08 09:34:50 AM
 
2003-10-08 09:36:31 AM
Just drink a few bottles of vinegar before a test, cleans you out and freshens the breath ... or so I've heard.
 
2003-10-08 09:40:42 AM
I've heard that goldenseal does the same thing.

There are cases where drug screening as absolutely necessary. Class "A" truck drivers, and any profession where you carry a sidearm.
 
2003-10-08 09:42:28 AM
I use one of these and I'm not even subject to drug testing.

I just like wearing them.
 
2003-10-08 09:42:57 AM
Drug testing is a sham. Especially for weed. And I don't even partake.

The only time I don't want someone high is if they're in a position to endanger me, like a bus driver or heavy equipment operator working around me. I don't think people should drive while high, but all the stoners I've ever known would rather hang out at home or a friend's house while baked, anyway.

But what people did on their own time a week ago is a crock of poop, as far as I'm concerned.
 
2003-10-08 09:44:37 AM
what are these drug tests that you speak of?

/haven't been required to take one since '98
 
2003-10-08 09:46:10 AM
So now with Ahnuld as gov of Calif. is everything going to be named with "nator" at the end?

"Hello this is Wendynator's would you like to try one of our super valuenator meals?"

"No, I'll just have a singlenator (no onionators) and large frostinator"
 
2003-10-08 09:46:44 AM
Unfreakable

Yup.
 
2003-10-08 09:46:44 AM
And I can't talk about MJ unless I post a picture of Jim Anchower:

Hola, Amigos!"
 
2003-10-08 09:46:54 AM
therealscrodd:

Me either but I haven't changed jobs since '98. Have you?
 
2003-10-08 09:49:12 AM
Collect all five
 
2003-10-08 09:51:20 AM
I can't wait to see Ron Popiel's infomercial.


not
 
2003-10-08 09:51:29 AM
Why the the black version the same size as the rest? And why is the latino version not uncut??
 
2003-10-08 09:51:32 AM
What if pot were legal, and there were jobs where you couldn't be a stoner? Would you want your neurosurgeon to have smoked an 1/8 before he works on your annuerism? How about the cop that has to shoot a criminal and not his hostage? Would you want your judge that decides whether or not you get the chair to have a case of the munchies? I support legalization of pot, but that doesn't mean that some people still have to be responsible in life. And for all you stoners out there, yes, pot accumulates and makes you stupid.

You can tell pot makes you stupid because it seems to make people want to wear Petchouli.
 
2003-10-08 09:52:11 AM
See, that's why you shouldn't order anything out of High Times.
 
2003-10-08 09:52:33 AM
When did Local6 move to Philadelphia?

Is clean urine the new currency in prison?
 
2003-10-08 09:54:13 AM
Canadians got this one right. It's a blatant privacy violation.

Go, go Gadget Whizzinator
 
2003-10-08 09:56:35 AM
2003-10-08 09:51:32 AM Bin_jammin


What if pot were legal, and there were jobs where you couldn't be a stoner? Would you want your neurosurgeon to have smoked an 1/8 before he works on your annuerism? How about the cop that has to shoot a criminal and not his hostage? Would you want your judge that decides whether or not you get the chair to have a case of the munchies? I support legalization of pot, but that doesn't mean that some people still have to be responsible in life. And for all you stoners out there, yes, pot accumulates and makes you stupid.

You can tell pot makes you stupid because it seems to make people want to wear Petchouli.


Words of wisdom.

Pot does not make you stupid. And being under the influence at work is illegal, not to mention stupid. We're not concerned about neurosurgeons drinking a 40 before work, are we?
 
2003-10-08 09:57:44 AM
And its "Patchouli."
 
2003-10-08 09:59:08 AM
They had a different way of getting around drug testing on the new ESPN show Playmakers. The star running back is a crackhead, and he had to take a piss test.

Something like the whizzinator wouldn't work, because they actually make you take off your pants/skivvies and pee into the cup right in front of them, to make sure there are no shenanigans.

So he goes to a doctor, who uses a catheter and a pump to inject clean urine that he got from a teammate into his bladder so that he can pass the test, which he does.
 
2003-10-08 09:59:15 AM
I don't think Amsterdam has a problem with brain surgeons operating while stoned.
 
2003-10-08 09:59:57 AM
I don't know about you Weemill but if there were someone poking anything into my BRAIN I'd be concerned if he'd had a tic-tac any time in the past month. And pot does make you stupid. :P
 
2003-10-08 10:00:17 AM
I hear you keep the bag of piss under your armpit to keep it warm.


"excuse me, might I equip myself with your mystical yellow tangy potion of -5 thc so I may go into battle with my enchanted whizzinator"

odd
 
2003-10-08 10:00:18 AM
Bin_jammin: Alcohol is legal, and most neurosurgeons, cops, and judges do their jobs just fine, because of the personal responsibility you mention.

I agree with the petchouli comment, though.

/non-smoker
 
2003-10-08 10:00:22 AM
2003-10-08 09:59:08 AM Brad_Will


They had a different way of getting around drug testing on the new ESPN show Playmakers. The star running back is a crackhead, and he had to take a piss test.

Something like the whizzinator wouldn't work, because they actually make you take off your pants/skivvies and pee into the cup right in front of them, to make sure there are no shenanigans.

So he goes to a doctor, who uses a catheter and a pump to inject clean urine that he got from a teammate into his bladder so that he can pass the test, which he does.


Yeah, i saw that on 'The Program,' with Omar Epps and my wife to be, Halle Berry.

Looks painful.
 
2003-10-08 10:01:06 AM
It can't be a coincedence that the people who say the loudest that "pot makes you stupid" always seem to turn out to be....well, not the sharpest knives in the drawer themselves. Kind of like how creationist never seem very evolved, isn't it?
 
2003-10-08 10:01:18 AM
Wierd... I actually looked up patchouli, I thought I cut and pasted it... must have had a brain freeze for that one...
 
2003-10-08 10:04:39 AM
Whizzinating the countryside
Whizzinating the peasants...
 
2003-10-08 10:04:43 AM
2003-10-08 10:01:18 AM Bin_jammin

Wierd... I actually looked up patchouli, I thought I cut and pasted it... must have had a brain freeze for that one...


Must be all that marijuana you smoke. Get real though, bro, read up on the medicinal effects of marijuana. Its not harmful at all, unless you smoke it, and well, everything you smoke is harmful.

Rillion
You've noticed that too? I tend to believe its because there are way too many people willing to believe something they hear from others. And given the US anti marijuana propaganda machine, its all to easy to believe. Funny enough, i've been arguing for legalization since junior high, and i never touched the stuff till late in my college career. I don't smoke now, but i would if it were legal.
 
2003-10-08 10:04:48 AM
Attention all stoners, your presence is required in the thread below this one.
 
2003-10-08 10:05:46 AM
Oh yeah Rillion believe me, I can't even keep track of how many stoners I've met that I've talked with about particle physics, or quantum mechanics. Or anything other than how good pizza tastes after a bag of cheeze doodlez. There are plenty of people out there that don't know diack... but I've never met anyone that smoked some serious doobage and came up with something like a portable dialisys machine, or a better mousetrap. Come to think of it, most of the stuff I'd imagine being invented by stoners I see for sale on tv at 4am... right around 4:20 am...
 
2003-10-08 10:06:20 AM
I don't understand this story because NOTHING goes "clink" against a plastic cup.
 
2003-10-08 10:06:51 AM
Have you ever considered, Bin_jammin, that maybe you just have stupid friends?
 
2003-10-08 10:07:30 AM
I checked out the whizzinator site.
I honestly, never would have been able to guess that some day I would see a sincere offer from any company that reads like this:
"YES, WE SELL DEHYDRATED URNIE SEPARATLEY"

Anyway...
In Russia, dehydrated urine sells you.
 
2003-10-08 10:07:45 AM
Depends, Weemill...

Maybe a 40 before surgery explain how one can forget about something like a blue 16-by-28-inch towel.
 
2003-10-08 10:08:28 AM
The way I see it, the drug testing craze can't be driven by CEO's deciding to do it based on some misguided morality. I mean, it costs money, and spending money unnecessarily is the biggest sin a beancounter can make.
No, the culprit has got to0 be the insurance companies and the feds. Federal contracts require it because some moral majority assholes have gotten regulations put in place, and the private sector that doesn't do federal contracts must be under pressure from insurance companies.
Does anybody know if insurance companies and workman's comp insurance actually give discounts to companies that drug test?
If so, there has to be some basis for class action here, since to my mind it is tantamount to search and seizure without a warrant, and runs counter to the innocent-until-proven-guilty ethic.
 
2003-10-08 10:11:56 AM
Based on the photos at the website, and added benefit is everyone will think you're hung like a horse.
 
2003-10-08 10:12:29 AM
2003-10-08 10:05:46 AM Bin_jammin


Oh yeah Rillion believe me, I can't even keep track of how many stoners I've met that I've talked with about particle physics, or quantum mechanics. Or anything other than how good pizza tastes after a bag of cheeze doodlez. There are plenty of people out there that don't know diack... but I've never met anyone that smoked some serious doobage and came up with something like a portable dialisys machine, or a better mousetrap. Come to think of it, most of the stuff I'd imagine being invented by stoners I see for sale on tv at 4am... right around 4:20 am...


Remember, half the people in the world are below average. Just because you hang out with a less than savory crowd doesn't necessarily mean that they are representative of the marijuana smoking crowd. I've known lots of alcoholics, and casual drinkers. Many were loser wine-o's and many were functioning members of society. Don't judge my character by the least of mine.
 
2003-10-08 10:12:36 AM
HipShot

LMAO
 
2003-10-08 10:13:06 AM
Rillion Of course I have stupid friends, it's to make me look good. Also, most of my friends (the majority) don't smoke pot, because all the people that used to be my friends that ended up smoking pot just seemed to not want to do anything but smoke pot anymore. It'd be like the big occasion for 'em. Either that or it'd be a situation where it wouldn't be cool at all to smoke, like on a boat. And Pot makes you stupid.
 
2003-10-08 10:14:09 AM
2003-10-08 10:07:45 AM Kepo


Depends, Weemill...

Maybe a 40 before surgery explain how one can forget about something like a blue 16-by-28-inch towel.


You've got a point there. But i'm more inclined to blame it on prescription drug abuse, or cocaine. Surgeons make too much money to sink down to the level of 40's.
 
2003-10-08 10:15:12 AM
BTW before you all flame me, stoners, read above posts. Notice I said I was pro pot, but also that there are some jobs where pot testing should be acceptable. I don't know why that's such a crime, if you can't stop smoking pot than I guess you likely wouldn't fit the job anyways...
 
2003-10-08 10:15:21 AM
2003-10-08 10:13:06 AM Bin_jammin


Rillion Of course I have stupid friends, it's to make me look good. Also, most of my friends (the majority) don't smoke pot, because all the people that used to be my friends that ended up smoking pot just seemed to not want to do anything but smoke pot anymore. It'd be like the big occasion for 'em. Either that or it'd be a situation where it wouldn't be cool at all to smoke, like on a boat. And Pot makes you stupid.


Just because stupid people use pot, and they seem stupider, doesn't mean that pot makes you stupid. Unless you know a study that i haven't read. Please, enlighten me.
 
2003-10-08 10:16:16 AM
I've heard that goldenseal does the same thing. - hipshot

i've heard that goldenseal used to be used to perform abortions in the oldey days. someone tell dubya to add it to his "things to make illegalated" list.

pot does not make you stupid. too much pot makes you stupid. much like one twinkie does not make you fat, or one tequiza does not make you drunk. moderation, people.
 
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