An oldie, but a goodie (new window)

That's just crass. You sprint out of there before the movie ends and then beat the shiat out of him in the parking lot in front of his wife.

Or if he is by himself, a nice thin blade to the brain stem will leave no one the wiser. Rude assholes deserve to die.

Never has the hero tag been so well deserved.

This is why I carry a garrote with me. Comes in handy more often than you might think.

Cewley: if movie theatres employed a cell blocking device, they'd double their ticket sales. nobody bought a ticket to listen to some rude, self-absorbed mouth breathing asshole. if you can't live without your phone for two hours, don't go in.

Too bad that's illegal.

Cewley: if movie theatres employed a cell blocking device, they'd double their ticket sales. nobody bought a ticket to listen to some rude, self-absorbed mouth breathing asshole. if you can't live without your phone for two hours, don't go in.

The problem is any active jamming devices are illegal in the US. They would need to line the theater with wallpaper or paint that can passively block cell phone signals. The problem then, however, is it blocks a whole slew of other things like EMT radios should there be an emergency.

We should add specific exceptions to our laws for things like this. Strangling others is illegal, unless....

In Philly, they shoot them.

\Not making that up

Gergesa: This is why I carry a garrote with me. Comes in handy more often than you might think.



'Hey! Down in Front!!!!'

Okay which one of you wrote this.
I think the choker went too far. He should have just shoved the phone up the rude guys rectum.

many of modern society's largest woes stem directly from not being able to reach out and choke the living shiat out of someone when it is truly called for. many would benefit, giving and getting.

Give that man a medal and keys to the city.

I could see a strangling for interrupting a good movie, but "Tower Heist"? Really?

I keed, I keed

Hate crime?

I think that every theater should adopt the Alamo Drafthouse way of handling callers and texters. (new window)

mcwehrle: I could see a strangling for interrupting a good movie, but "Tower Heist"? Really?

I keed, I keed

It was probably more entertaining than the movie

In related news, people inexplicably still go to these things called "movie theaters."

drjekel_mrhyde: Okay which one of you wrote this.
I think the choker went too far. He should have just shoved the phone up the rude guys rectum.



Agrees, and is gonna shove that phone where you'll have an awful hard time dialing it.

I don't typically condone violence of any kind, but I wish I could feel this man's satisfaction.

This one's on me, Mr. Hero Guy.

/Bravo!

This is in my 'hood! cheers, neighbor!

mcwehrle: I could see a strangling for interrupting a good movie, but "Tower Heist"? Really?

I keed, I keed

But if the movie's bad enough, I can see choking a jerk as a viable stress relief method.

/gotta get yer money's worth somehow

No jury would convict.

Bermuda59: mcwehrle: I could see a strangling for interrupting a good movie, but "Tower Heist"? Really?

I keed, I keed

It was probably more entertaining than the movie

I completely agree with you.

Completely understand the urge to choke the crap out of someone who keeps their phone on in a theatre. Though movies are probably the cheapest form of entertainment going, they still aren't that cheap. If I wanted to watch a movie with someones cell going off, I'd rent it and invite friends over for the night. I agree, if you can't go without checking your email or turning off your cell phone for 2 hours, don't go to the movies. It's rude and unfair to other movie goers. That, more than the fact that most movies are crap, is the reason why I wait for the DVD.

This is one of those cases where jury nullification is FTW! We need to make it not worth it for DAs to bring charges against those who assault movie-cellphone-talkers.

Someone "forgot" to shut off their cell phone during my mother's funeral, and whoever it was happened to be lucky that I was too tired to actually turn around and find out who they were. So, yeah, I really do understand wanting to go off on one of those self-absorbed assholes.

Did the guy actually talk on the phone? I think he got choked because he called the other guy an A**hole.

Looks legit to me.
Fvk these people who answer phones in the middle of a movie. The hell is wrong with
society today, no consideration for anyone else.

Last time I was in the theater, some like 6'3" Richard Dreyfuss hippie farker took off his shoes and socks and propped his feet up high on the headrest in front of him. After being told repeatedly by fellow patrons to please stop, some guy in way back hucked a soda at the back of his head and they were both eventually escorted out. It was awesome.

/did I mention I hate theaters?
//act like you've been to town before.

KatjaMouse: I think that every theater should adopt the Alamo Drafthouse way of handling callers and texters. (new window)

Yes and no here. I honestly couldn't care less about texters IF, and only if - they turn the damn sound off. As long I'm not getting noise the whole movie they can sit there and quietly press keys all they want. And if just the glow of a cellphone screen is enough to ruin your whole movie-going experience ya need some meds - you must have a hell of a time if someone has to cough, change position, or get up for snacks or the bathroom.

As long as they're 100% QUIET, and not moving so as to block the screen - who gives a shiate what they're doing.

PS: I'll give anyone one mulligan for a ring - sometimes people do forget or miss-set their phones. But twice = screw this time to dig up a manager.

KatjaMouse: I think that every theater should adopt the Alamo Drafthouse way of handling callers and texters. (new window)
Alamo Drafthouse is the awesome.

The only place I go to see movies now.

Cewley: if movie theatres employed a cell blocking device, they'd double their ticket sales. nobody bought a ticket to listen to some rude, self-absorbed mouth breathing asshole. if you can't live without your phone for two hours, don't go in.

This. People go to the movies to enjoy the farking movie. If you can't shut the fark up, and use the common courtesy that has been in place since cinema began (aka SHUT YOUR farkING TRAP), then stay away from movie theaters. You deserve what you get, when you act like an ass.

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: KatjaMouse: I think that every theater should adopt the Alamo Drafthouse way of handling callers and texters. (new window)

Yes and no here. I honestly couldn't care less about texters IF, and only if - they turn the damn sound off. As long I'm not getting noise the whole movie they can sit there and quietly press keys all they want. And if just the glow of a cellphone screen is enough to ruin your whole movie-going experience ya need some meds - you must have a hell of a time if someone has to cough, change position, or get up for snacks or the bathroom.

As long as they're 100% QUIET, and not moving so as to block the screen - who gives a shiate what they're doing.

PS: I'll give anyone one mulligan for a ring - sometimes people do forget or miss-set their phones. But twice = screw this time to dig up a manager.

There is an image for that, can't find it right now though.

Basically it shows what you are supposed to see (a movie screen) and what you actually see (a movie screen and a bunch of white rectangles of light scattered all around.)

MightyPez: Cewley: if movie theatres employed a cell blocking device, they'd double their ticket sales. nobody bought a ticket to listen to some rude, self-absorbed mouth breathing asshole. if you can't live without your phone for two hours, don't go in.

The problem is any active jamming devices are illegal in the US. They would need to line the theater with wallpaper or paint that can passively block cell phone signals. The problem then, however, is it blocks a whole slew of other things like EMT radios should there be an emergency.


Maybe I have this wrong, but if they enclosed the theater in a wire mesh (behind the sound proofing) it would block signals when grounded, and allow them through when it wasn't. In case of emergency they could just shut it off.

Studios always whine about the drop in attendance and blame it on an abundance of factors. I'll always maintain that the chief reason, that they never seem to address, is that it's so damn unpleasant anymore. It's this stupid sense of self-absorbed entitlement that seems to permeate this generation that makes them think they can act in the theater the same way they do in their living room. You add the high price of everything to it and you start to think, "Why should I pay ridiculously high prices to have to listen to some mouth breather yammer through the movie?" And yes, you'll have to listen to it since they never shut up, no matter how nicely or firmly you ask, personal solutions all seem to be illegal and managers always say they'll do something about it but never do because it would mean probably having to have a confrontation. I used to be an avid theater goer, almost every week. Now it's down to once every few months for stuff that absolutely has to be seen in a theater because the smallest portion of the audience has killed it for me.

MightyPez: Cewley: if movie theatres employed a cell blocking device, they'd double their ticket sales. nobody bought a ticket to listen to some rude, self-absorbed mouth breathing asshole. if you can't live without your phone for two hours, don't go in.

The problem is any active jamming devices are illegal in the US. They would need to line the theater with wallpaper or paint that can passively block cell phone signals. The problem then, however, is it blocks a whole slew of other things like EMT radios should there be an emergency.


Easy: simply reserve one screen (out of 16 or however many -plex there are) as the Faraday Theatre, and charge a premium. Rather than a 27-ticket showing of the #5 movie that week, they could screen an 80%-capacity showing of the #1, populated entirely by folks who would have otherwise stayed home to avoid the idiots. The Faraday Screen could also be 18/21+, because that's who they're courting anyway.

Thoughts?

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: KatjaMouse: I think that every theater should adopt the Alamo Drafthouse way of handling callers and texters. (new window)

Yes and no here. I honestly couldn't care less about texters IF, and only if - they turn the damn sound off. As long I'm not getting noise the whole movie they can sit there and quietly press keys all they want. And if just the glow of a cellphone screen is enough to ruin your whole movie-going experience ya need some meds - you must have a hell of a time if someone has to cough, change position, or get up for snacks or the bathroom.

As long as they're 100% QUIET, and not moving so as to block the screen - who gives a shiate what they're doing.

PS: I'll give anyone one mulligan for a ring - sometimes people do forget or miss-set their phones. But twice = screw this time to dig up a manager


Not really....the glow from the last cellphone I had to endure was honestly bright enough to use as a flashlight. I didn't say anything, wasn't an ass, but it really did bother me. I just moved a few seats further away, but still....can you NOT live without texting/yapping/somehow holding your electronic toy for two hours?

That's the scary thing.

Loomy: MightyPez: Cewley: if movie theatres employed a cell blocking device, they'd double their ticket sales. nobody bought a ticket to listen to some rude, self-absorbed mouth breathing asshole. if you can't live without your phone for two hours, don't go in.

The problem is any active jamming devices are illegal in the US. They would need to line the theater with wallpaper or paint that can passively block cell phone signals. The problem then, however, is it blocks a whole slew of other things like EMT radios should there be an emergency.


Easy: simply reserve one screen (out of 16 or however many -plex there are) as the Faraday Theatre, and charge a premium. Rather than a 27-ticket showing of the #5 movie that week, they could screen an 80%-capacity showing of the #1, populated entirely by folks who would have otherwise stayed home to avoid the idiots. The Faraday Screen could also be 18/21+, because that's who they're courting anyway.

Thoughts?


Can't they simply unground the cage in case of an emergency? Maybe rig something up so that when the lights are off the cage is active and when the lights come back the cage turns off?

DeadMouseTails: Completely understand the urge to choke the crap out of someone who keeps their phone on in a theatre. Though movies are probably the cheapest form of entertainment going, they still aren't that cheap. If I wanted to watch a movie with someones cell going off, I'd rent it and invite friends over for the night. I agree, if you can't go without checking your email or turning off your cell phone for 2 hours, don't go to the movies. It's rude and unfair to other movie goers. That, more than the fact that most movies are crap, is the reason why I wait for the DVD.

I'll make sure I stay off your lawn.

/I keed, I keed.