If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Topless Robot)   William Shatner fires a photon torpedo at Carrie Fisher   (toplessrobot.com) divider line 358
    More: Followup, William Shatner, Carrie Fisher, photon torpedo  
•       •       •

38137 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Nov 2011 at 6:17 PM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



358 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all
 
2011-11-30 06:51:37 PM  
Shatner - 1, Fisher - 0
 
2011-11-30 06:53:34 PM  
I do have to say, for an eighty year-old, he still has some guns.
 
2011-11-30 06:53:55 PM  
Not to mention retarded tech errors like hand aimed cannon on the MFalcon. "They are moving too fast!" Ya, really?
 
2011-11-30 06:54:20 PM  

Cid_Highwind: In fairness, the idea that Star Wars ships and the like don't have shields is pretty easy conclusion to come to from watching the movies, because they're either never turned on or they never work. The characters pay lip service to the concept but even with all your shield energy focused behind you, you're still gonna get blown up in one burst from a tailgating asshole in a TIE fighter.

Even if we're allowing for weapons that make shields irrelevant, spacecraft regularly collide with each other with disastrous consequences.

So perhaps it should be amended:

Star destroyers don't have useful shields.


It's the whole particle vs "ray" shield concept in Star Wars. Star War's made up physics system says that "ray" (anti laser) shields are really easy to generate. Particle shields (anti torpedo shields and the like) are not. So that is why against a Star Destroyer a fighter can dive in and strafe it. It fires its lasers from inside the ray shielding (since the shielding is projected out like a sphere). Whereas when you have something like a massive planetary shield array (Death Star II) you can generate a really powerful particle shield and keep the snub fighters out.

Also Imperial ships supposedly have shiat shielding since they focus more on offensive firepower. A New Republic Mon Cal or something with its massive amount of shielding might do better versus the Enterprise.

/of course it is all "my made up physics could kick your made up physic's ass"
 
2011-11-30 06:55:07 PM  
Fisher was/is great anytime she's on Craig Fergusons show and Shatners Raw Nerve has it's moments of greatness - though I suspect he's run out of friends and neighbors to interview . . .
Oh and this little bit? Pretty funny.
 
2011-11-30 06:59:45 PM  
Came for sexy pics of coked out 70's Carrie.
/I'll show myself out.
 
2011-11-30 07:03:15 PM  

Kanemano: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 398x505]



BuckTurgidson: Imperial Star Destroyer > Battlestar Galactica > Enterprise

Mugato: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 398x505]

1) Star Destroyers do have shields
2) They don't use actual lasers
3) Trek has never used the transporter as a weapon as they could have easily done, especially with those Borg ships that let them beam in and out at will

/end geek rant


the Enterprise and the Star Trek Universe uses battleship tactics, Star wars and BSG use Aircraft carrier tactics,


how many battleships can one carrier destroy? lets ask the Japanese from the battle of midway.


Um, zero?

Carriers, however, did a lot of sinking in that battle.
 
2011-11-30 07:04:17 PM  

Kanemano: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 398x505]



BuckTurgidson: Imperial Star Destroyer > Battlestar Galactica > Enterprise

Mugato: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 398x505]

1) Star Destroyers do have shields
2) They don't use actual lasers
3) Trek has never used the transporter as a weapon as they could have easily done, especially with those Borg ships that let them beam in and out at will

/end geek rant


the Enterprise and the Star Trek Universe uses battleship tactics, Star wars and BSG use Aircraft carrier tactics,


how many battleships can one carrier destroy? lets ask the Japanese from the battle of midway.


I know I'm being a history nerd in a thread full of sci-fi nerds, but there were no battleships sunk at Midway.
 
2011-11-30 07:05:44 PM  
Sigourney Weaver? I loved her in that movie!
I liked the parts where she repeated every single line that the computer responded with.
 
2011-11-30 07:06:43 PM  

Diogenes Teufelsdrockh:
how many battleships can one carrier destroy? lets ask the Japanese from the battle of midway.

Um, zero?

Carriers, however, did a lot of sinking in that battle.


*shakes fist*
 
2011-11-30 07:07:27 PM  

BlueJay206: Sigourney Weaver? I loved her in that movie!
I liked the parts where she repeated every single line that the computer responded with.


Ewe, that's just not right.
 
2011-11-30 07:08:38 PM  
Gotta love autocorrect.
 
2011-11-30 07:10:01 PM  

ha-ha-guy: The first two were mediocre and then the Ewoks just flushed it down the drain


Empire was better than any Trek films and there were at least three Trek films worse than the SW prequels.

He could also acknowledge that there wouldn't be a Star Trek after the animated series if SW didn't hit.
 
2011-11-30 07:12:43 PM  

toraque: Kanemano: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 398x505]



BuckTurgidson: Imperial Star Destroyer > Battlestar Galactica > Enterprise

Mugato: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 398x505]

1) Star Destroyers do have shields
2) They don't use actual lasers
3) Trek has never used the transporter as a weapon as they could have easily done, especially with those Borg ships that let them beam in and out at will

/end geek rant


the Enterprise and the Star Trek Universe uses battleship tactics, Star wars and BSG use Aircraft carrier tactics,


how many battleships can one carrier destroy? lets ask the Japanese from the battle of midway.

I know I'm being a history nerd in a thread full of sci-fi nerds, but there were no battleships sunk at Midway.


HOLY Bat'Leth! Now I gotta post ANOTHER oblig.

i291.photobucket.com

/not really
//flame on
 
2011-11-30 07:14:54 PM  
BuckTurgidson: Imperial Star Destroyer > Battlestar Galactica > Enterprise

BSG > Ent > SD

Only because nBSG was somewhat realistic in what might remotely be possible with future tech (missiles, guns, projectiles, and the need for supply lines). ENT because it's science fiction and somewhat believable for ship that is harnessing the power equivalent of a sun to warp spacetime (super energy shielding, phase radiation weapons, ect).

A star destroyer was eye candy, and from everything we saw in Star wars seemed to just be a oversized troop transport. Freaking meteors were taking those slow, cumbersome things out for gods sake.
 
2011-11-30 07:14:54 PM  

Bagelox-99: Dangit, I always have trouble looking at Carrie Fisher because as heavy, nip/tucked, prematurely jacked-up and surrounded by gay male idolators as she is, she's still Carrie Fisher.

/I would still hit it, because she looks like she'd be racy fun right from hello.

//And because SHE'S CARRIE FARKIN FISHER.


Your newsletter, I wish to subscribe to it.
 
2011-11-30 07:16:36 PM  

Mugato: He could also acknowledge that there wouldn't be a Star Trek after the animated series if SW didn't hit.


Sort of disagree. Star Wars fast-tracked Trek's return, but I think Trek's loyal cadre of fans would've grown over time regardless (thanks to novels, conventions, VHS releases, etc.), until a revival was inevitable.

It's an odd stance you've chosen, considering your screen name.
 
2011-11-30 07:18:45 PM  

Mugato: ha-ha-guy: The first two were mediocre and then the Ewoks just flushed it down the drain

Empire was better than any Trek films and there were at least three Trek films worse than the SW prequels.

He could also acknowledge that there wouldn't be a Star Trek after the animated series if SW didn't hit.


Outside of the original movie and Nemesis, what's the third?
 
2011-11-30 07:20:42 PM  

simplicimus: Outside of the original movie and Nemesis, what's the third?


Insurrection?

/I liked it.
//Apparently, quite the minority there.
 
2011-11-30 07:21:40 PM  
How would a photon torpedo cause damage? Just light up the target? Now protons, that's where it's at.
 
2011-11-30 07:21:47 PM  
Kanemano:
the Enterprise and the Star Trek Universe uses battleship tactics, Star wars and BSG use Aircraft carrier tactics,


how many battleships can one carrier destroy? lets ask the Japanese from the battle of midway.


Problem with Trek is their power source and technology is so far beyond SW that it's not funny. Trek always went with the cinematic, but in reality they're at a level where it just be two ships sitting hundreds of kilometers away from each other trading blows on the magnitude of solar flairs.

But that's not interesting cinematography.

SW is really weird because they wanted it all ways. Hell, they had a indestructible battle station the size of a moon that could destroy planets, but a convenient exhaust port that couldn't be closed off in a emergency.

Why do you need fleets of small, CQC craft when you also posses the power of a star? Just widen out the beam and take out a fleet of battleships, let alone fighter craft...
 
2011-11-30 07:21:55 PM  
How much Viagra and Botox does it take to do that to a human face?
 
2011-11-30 07:21:58 PM  

simplicimus: Mugato: ha-ha-guy: The first two were mediocre and then the Ewoks just flushed it down the drain

Empire was better than any Trek films and there were at least three Trek films worse than the SW prequels.

He could also acknowledge that there wouldn't be a Star Trek after the animated series if SW didn't hit.

Outside of the original movie and Nemesis, what's the third?

Star Trek V: The Final Frontier

directed by William Shatner

"Why does God need a starship?"
 
2011-11-30 07:21:58 PM  

toraque: Kanemano: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 398x505]



BuckTurgidson: Imperial Star Destroyer > Battlestar Galactica > Enterprise

Mugato: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 398x505]

1) Star Destroyers do have shields
2) They don't use actual lasers
3) Trek has never used the transporter as a weapon as they could have easily done, especially with those Borg ships that let them beam in and out at will

/end geek rant


the Enterprise and the Star Trek Universe uses battleship tactics, Star wars and BSG use Aircraft carrier tactics,


how many battleships can one carrier destroy? lets ask the Japanese from the battle of midway.

I know I'm being a history nerd in a thread full of sci-fi nerds, but there were no battleships sunk at Midway.


OK maybe the sinking of the Yamato would have been a better example of mighty one battleship vs. tens of small fighters.
 
2011-11-30 07:23:47 PM  

Shadow Blasko: simplicimus: Outside of the original movie and Nemesis, what's the third?

Insurrection?

/I liked it.
//Apparently, quite the minority there.


Hey, I like the save the whales movie, but the why does god need a starship not so much.
 
2011-11-30 07:23:48 PM  

Shadow Blasko: Insurrection?

/I liked it.
//Apparently, quite the minority there.


I actually enjoyed Insurrection too. The hammy performance from F. Murray Abraham was tremendous.
 
2011-11-30 07:24:10 PM  

BroVinny: Mugato: He could also acknowledge that there wouldn't be a Star Trek after the animated series if SW didn't hit.

Sort of disagree. Star Wars fast-tracked Trek's return, but I think Trek's loyal cadre of fans would've grown over time regardless (thanks to novels, conventions, VHS releases, etc.), until a revival was inevitable.

It's an odd stance you've chosen, considering your screen name.


Well, the thing is, there was a second Star Trek series in production circa 1977.

It was called Star Trek: Phase II. A live action series about a second Five Year Mission. The Enterprise has been refitted (and much more modern looking) and they had created some new characters.

When Star Wars became a hit, Phase II was re-tooled into Star Trek: The Motion Picture. The characters of Will Decker and Ilia were originally created for Phase II, as was Xon (a replacement Vulcan, since Leonard Nimoy didn't want to come back).

They had a half-season of episodes sketched out when it was cancelled, and they ended up using some of the more fleshed-out ones for a couple of TNG episodes during the late 80s Writers Guild Strike.

The TNG episodes The Child and Devil's Due were written originally for Star Trek: Phase II.

Star Trek as a movie franchise traces to the success of Star Wars, that would be a far more accurate statement.
 
2011-11-30 07:24:52 PM  

Mugato: towatchoverme: And - Mugatu - Voyager beamed a photon torpedo onto the deck of a borg cube in one of their episodes. I forget which.

Well then all the did was elucidate the idiocy of the Enterprise -D.

The transporter is the worst contrivance Trek ever came up with and it's all because they couldn't afford a shuttlecraft in the first season.


Yeah. And the dumbest part is always worried about being beamed into solid matter like rock. News flash genius: beaming your body into AIR will kill you just as fast as rock. Not to mention the fact that technically you're dying every time you beam somewhere. The thing that arrives at the other end is just a duplicate copy of you.
 
2011-11-30 07:27:08 PM  
Fisher's "rant" had to be heavily edited to make any sort of sense at all and was in addition still lame. Kirk, I mean, Shatner, delivers a perfectly good and amusing rant all in one take.
 
2011-11-30 07:29:33 PM  
I love Carrie and William. They are both has-beens, and they not only know it, they embrace it, with a subtle sense of humor that makes me all warm and fuzzy. Can't you see the humorous chemistry between these two?

Carrie and Bill ought to have a talk show together.
 
2011-11-30 07:30:07 PM  

Kanemano: toraque: Kanemano: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 398x505]



BuckTurgidson: Imperial Star Destroyer > Battlestar Galactica > Enterprise

Mugato: Thanks for the Meme-ries: [i291.photobucket.com image 398x505]

1) Star Destroyers do have shields
2) They don't use actual lasers
3) Trek has never used the transporter as a weapon as they could have easily done, especially with those Borg ships that let them beam in and out at will

/end geek rant


the Enterprise and the Star Trek Universe uses battleship tactics, Star wars and BSG use Aircraft carrier tactics,


how many battleships can one carrier destroy? lets ask the Japanese from the battle of midway.

I know I'm being a history nerd in a thread full of sci-fi nerds, but there were no battleships sunk at Midway.

OK maybe the sinking of the Yamato would have been a better example of mighty one battleship vs. tens of small fighters.


Not really, as the Yamato was simply thrown at the enemy intending to sacrifice itself in a hopeless battle just to buy time in order to fortify the Japanese mainland. It didn't even carry enough fuel for the return trip.

The Battle of Taranto is probably the best historical match, as it was the first decisive air to ship engagement and heralded the rise of naval aviation over the battleship.

No ewoks were involved in either battle.
 
2011-11-30 07:30:50 PM  
Ouch, I saw Fisher at one of the roasts a few years ago and now she's unrecognizable. I didn't pick her for one to go down the tragic plastic surgery path.
 
2011-11-30 07:31:34 PM  

TyrantII: Kanemano:
the Enterprise and the Star Trek Universe uses battleship tactics, Star wars and BSG use Aircraft carrier tactics,


how many battleships can one carrier destroy? lets ask the Japanese from the battle of midway.

Problem with Trek is their power source and technology is so far beyond SW that it's not funny. Trek always went with the cinematic, but in reality they're at a level where it just be two ships sitting hundreds of kilometers away from each other trading blows on the magnitude of solar flairs.

But that's not interesting cinematography.

SW is really weird because they wanted it all ways. Hell, they had a indestructible battle station the size of a moon that could destroy planets, but a convenient exhaust port that couldn't be closed off in a emergency.

Why do you need fleets of small, CQC craft when you also posses the power of a star? Just widen out the beam and take out a fleet of battleships, let alone fighter craft...


I dont honestly recall any attempt to explain SW-ian physics in terms of tech level. At least not in the movies. They had huge exhaust ports on star destroyers, indicating some pretty serious fuel being burned, but then the deathstar just kind of wafted along with no external engines of any kind.

Star treks techology was just plain bat fark made up.And the horrible part is it just kept getting stupider. The Holo-deck was about the dumbest thing I have ever seen. I seem to recall an episode where they got trapped inside and the people outside couldnt turn it off because then the people inside would be gone forever.......Seems a little severe for a simple light effect. If you really can use the technology of a holodeck to disintegrate matter then shouldnt you make a portable version, stick some engines on the back and drill holes in the borg with it?

And plot.

They couldnt be different. SW was a story arc, a lame story arc, but still there was a farking point to what people were doing. 90% of star trek was typical serial episodic numbnuts. Introduce new alien race, or scientific problem, or on ship romance. Put it in front of a back drop of a new alien race, science problem, or romance and poof! you have an episode. Oh look theres a quantum hyper field destroying the environment of this planet full of simple agrarian hot chicks who have some social quirk that makes it possible for Kirk/ Ryker to sex them all up before solving the problem.
 
2011-11-30 07:32:24 PM  

fusillade762: Mugato: towatchoverme: And - Mugatu - Voyager beamed a photon torpedo onto the deck of a borg cube in one of their episodes. I forget which.

Well then all the did was elucidate the idiocy of the Enterprise -D.

The transporter is the worst contrivance Trek ever came up with and it's all because they couldn't afford a shuttlecraft in the first season.

Yeah. And the dumbest part is always worried about being beamed into solid matter like rock. News flash genius: beaming your body into AIR will kill you just as fast as rock. Not to mention the fact that technically you're dying every time you beam somewhere. The thing that arrives at the other end is just a duplicate copy of you.


Same with any kind of Stargate or wormhole kind of thing. Also in theory it should allow cloning. When you transport someone you have to beam along reassembly directions. So if someone dies, stuff the amount of matter needed to make them into a transporter (get a corpse or a dead monkey or two), beam that and your last set of reassembling instructions for the person somewhere. Oh look person X is now back.
 
2011-11-30 07:32:58 PM  

BroVinny: simplicimus: Mugato: ha-ha-guy: The first two were mediocre and then the Ewoks just flushed it down the drain

Empire was better than any Trek films and there were at least three Trek films worse than the SW prequels.

He could also acknowledge that there wouldn't be a Star Trek after the animated series if SW didn't hit.

Outside of the original movie and Nemesis, what's the third?

Star Trek V: The Final Frontier directed by William Shatner

"Why does God need a starship?"


Can you even imagine the logistics of pizza delivery on super bowl sunday when you are a diety who lives on a planetoid far from earth? It takes some subtle manipulation of the human soul to get nasa to launch a probe in your direction with some Dominoes on board.
 
2011-11-30 07:33:37 PM  

MagSeven: Came for sexy pics of coked out 70's Carrie.
/I'll show myself out.


they're too busy geeking out over the shields/no shields thing to worry about things like hot chicks..
 
2011-11-30 07:33:53 PM  
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2011-11-30 07:33:58 PM  

simplicimus: Outside of the original movie and Nemesis, what's the third?


Final Frontier, Insurrection and I dare you to find more plot holes in the entire prequel trilogy than were in Generations.
 
2011-11-30 07:34:03 PM  
Virulency:

ya i wonder if the old enterprise could cope with a tie bomber swarm...

also why don't they EVER transport a bomb or something onto another ship?


TNG CONUNDRUM covered that pretty well. The big E rolled right through an aliens races planetary fighters like a Juggernaut.

In Trek ships have energy shields and unless you know their shield frequency to compensate you can't transport anything through them. This sort of explains why trek is sometimes lose with "rescuing" people during battles where their shields are most likely up.
 
2011-11-30 07:34:03 PM  
How it should be solved ...

img820.imageshack.us

Uploaded with ImageShack.us


/Someone else's submission in a Fark Photoshop content soon after I joined Fark.
//Those were great back then , weren't they?
///not a likely outcome
 
2011-11-30 07:35:36 PM  

archichris: I dont honestly recall any attempt to explain SW-ian physics in terms of tech level. At least not in the movies. They had huge exhaust ports on star destroyers, indicating some pretty serious fuel being burned, but then the deathstar just kind of wafted along with no external engines of any kind.


SW Tech never did have any kind of initial plans to be consistent. Lucas just wanted the best special effects and good lines. So he tossed in a bunch of words like shields, lasers, proton torpedos, etc for the characters to say. Then he filmed whatever looked cool.

Also SW suffers in that every official game, comic book, and novel is canon. So dozens of authors have gotten to further butcher the physics of SW over the past decades. People try to retcon it into something uniform, but it's pointless to a degree.
 
2011-11-30 07:35:55 PM  
Holy crap, I went back and watch Carrie's rant. First it's lame. And second, what the heck happened to her! She looks like crap!
 
2011-11-30 07:36:02 PM  
The real question is why dont Jedi Masters make a lightsaber that is just 16 of them attached together at the hilt, forming kind of a koosh ball of death and then fling it around with their minds........
 
2011-11-30 07:36:08 PM  

Tumunga: they're too busy geeking out over the shields/no shields thing to worry about things like hot chicks..



img844.imageshack.us

cheers
 
2011-11-30 07:37:22 PM  

ha-ha-guy: archichris: I dont honestly recall any attempt to explain SW-ian physics in terms of tech level. At least not in the movies. They had huge exhaust ports on star destroyers, indicating some pretty serious fuel being burned, but then the deathstar just kind of wafted along with no external engines of any kind.

SW Tech never did have any kind of initial plans to be consistent. Lucas just wanted the best special effects and good lines. So he tossed in a bunch of words like shields, lasers, proton torpedos, etc for the characters to say. Then he filmed whatever looked cool.

Also SW suffers in that every official game, comic book, and novel is canon. So dozens of authors have gotten to further butcher the physics of SW over the past decades. People try to retcon it into something uniform, but it's pointless to a degree.


They should have just paid the asking price and bought the inertia-less light drive from the outsiders.......

/too obscure?
 
2011-11-30 07:38:03 PM  
jb.org
 
2011-11-30 07:38:32 PM  
They should do it already so we can all go hysterically blind and deaf
 
2011-11-30 07:38:37 PM  

TyrantII: In Trek ships have energy shields and unless you know their shield frequency to compensate you can't transport anything through them


...but you can shoot matter through it if you know the frequency, when Soren got the Enterprise's shield frequency from Georgi's air filter.
 
2011-11-30 07:40:04 PM  

dstanley: [jb.org image 278x216]


Gee, that's inspired.
 
2011-11-30 07:40:23 PM  

archichris: inertia-less light drive from the outsiders


Is Niven ever obscure?
 
Displayed 50 of 358 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all



This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report