FTFA
"Hill acknowledges her attitude is controversial and admits it needs finessing, given the fact she and Dean recently broke up."

I love how these polyamory evangelists act like they're are the first ones to discover sleeping around and then act all shocked when it doesn't work out for them.

Yeah... I would never be okay with my boyfriend (or myself) getting any outside our relationship. But if that's what you AND your partner feel works for your relationship, then go for it.

I wouldn't say hot but I'd hit it

Came for the predictable matrimonial snobbery, leaving satisfied.

Hardy-r-r: Well what do you know, she has a book out.

Link (new window)

And it came out over a full year ago, what's your point?

Peki: As someone who is in an open relationship, it really irks me when people call it "infidelity" or "negotiated cheating." If my fiance goes and gets a nice piece of tail with my permission, that's not being unfaithful. Cheating to me implies deception, a kind of dishonesty I don't want in my relationship. Humans aren't monogamous by nature, and to me being all "omg I can't believe you're checking out another chick" just creates a forbidden fruit scenario I really don't have the energy or desire to deal with. It's also a bonus for me because I'm bi, so the rule is, if he gets to have it, so do I.

This isn't a lifestyle for everyone; most people simply cannot handle the idea of someone else scoring on their turf. I don't think a person is wrong for that feeling; what is wrong is when your partner does not respect your feelings and does what they want anyway. Monogamous or not, respect must come first. There's no relationship without that.

So much THIS.

There are people who just cannot have an open relationship, but for those who can it's almost refreshing. If you're in a committed relationship, the relationship should not be only about sex, it's about trust and friendship. When you realize that, you can realize that monogamy is artificial and jealousy is wasted energy. And extracurricular activities are certainly not cheating.

I don't have to feel bad for for flirting with the cutie at the conference, or hooking up with her back at my hotel. Likewise, my wife doesn't have to worry about restraining herself at the party when someone is hitting on her. We give the steamy details in the morning, and it's a bit of a turn on.

What's wrong with working out rules for your relationship together and sticking to them - and not telling everyone your way is the only way? Both 'monogamy is the best' and 'polyamory is healthy' evangelists gripe me - it is just what works for you. There isn't a one size fits all. What happens between consenting adult partners is between them.

I will say I hope poly amorous types are somewhat circumspect around offspring. Seen that get messy (whose baby oops) and some farked up teenagers who resent what their parents openly do, leading to peer issues. Just keep it on the down low a bit guys.

And let's just settle on the whole nasty name calling - accusing someone of whoredom over this just shows small mindedness.

/ happily monogamous with magic bloke who is happier that way top. That's what works for us.

steamingpile: Nickninja: I don't have to feel bad for for flirting with the cutie at the conference, or hooking up with her back at my hotel. Likewise, my wife doesn't have to worry about restraining herself at the party when someone is hitting on her. We give the steamy details in the morning, and it's a bit of a turn on.

Some people like being cuckolds, youre one of them. Just do the guy farking your wife a favor, spare him since your wife is the whore and you are the dumbass allowing her to be a whore.

Human brains are monogamous no matter what you think, otherwise jealousy would not exist at all.

The existence of jealousy doesnt mean that monogomy is hardwired. Jealousy exists as a driving force to get things that we dont have or protect what is ours. My wife and i just recognize that we dont need exclusive rights to each other's genitals in order to feel comfortable in our relationship. Its certainly not for everyone, but it can be very fun for all parties involved. Meaning i get just as much fun on the side as she does.

/ btw, whores get paid. We are sluts.
//que 'haters gonna hate' kid

steamingpile: Nickninja: I don't have to feel bad for for flirting with the cutie at the conference, or hooking up with her back at my hotel. Likewise, my wife doesn't have to worry about restraining herself at the party when someone is hitting on her. We give the steamy details in the morning, and it's a bit of a turn on.

Some people like being cuckolds, youre one of them. Just do the guy farking your wife a favor, spare him since your wife is the whore and you are the dumbass allowing her to be a whore.

Human brains are monogamous no matter what you think, otherwise jealousy would not exist at all.

I know you're just trolling, but I want to reply to this anyway.

Jealousy is far broader than just sex. It's about possessions in general - jealousy that someone has something that you want. It would be more accurate to say that monogamy exists because of jealousy - one human wants another, and wants no one else to have them. Not necessarily one human wanting a single other human; you can have one person wanting to have more than one other person, just all to themselves. ie: Polygamy is just as much a reason for jealousy as monogamy. One man wants as many young nubile women as he can get, and is jealous of a man who has a woman he wants... even though he has a dozen of his own right now.

Just the same way that some humans want (X), and to keep any other humans from having (X). I might even extend the argument to say that jealousy isn't just something humans feel toward one another, but toward anything that they perceive to have something they want. People can be jealous of the love that someone gives to a pet, a love they want for themselves, for example.

Applying reason to emotional matters is as effective as using strong language to calm a thunderstorm.