I recognize that headline. It's one of those twisted songs that kids in about 6th sing, and is older than Butch Wax and cork popguns, Subby.

 

There's another old one that goes:

Frosty the Snowman
Left terror in his tracks
As he roamed down the street finding people to eat
And chopping up folks with an axe.

Just for future reference in case some Frosty character goes all cannibal some day.

Ok, subby, that was better than my headline. *tips hat*

This just made the cut for headline of the year consideration.

remus: Ok, subby, that was better than my headline. *tips hat*

Tip of a magic old top hat?

Headline is full of win

Is there anyone the police CAN'T beat anymore?

Marcus Aurelius: What is it about cops and dogs? They love shooting other peoples dogs, but you say a word about their mutt and they go all psycho. My local K-9 officer goes apeshiat if you go near his car when the dog's in it. We're lucky he hasn't killed anyone yet.

They get even weirder if the dog picks you out to like.

Was in Huntsville and they were doing a dog demo as part of a project we were debating working on. The handler was giving us the thing about how the dog wouldn't respond to anyone but him bla bla, and the dog was walking down the line of us showing how the dog could spot drugs or whatnot. Then the dog looked over her shoulder at me, I grinned back, and the dog rears up, puts her paws on my shoulders and starts tongue washing my face and wagging like old home week. Then she starts running around me arfing and hip bumping me.

The guy went apoplectic about patting the dog. Hell, I DID pat the dog, but only after she decided she knew me or whatever. Or maybe I just smell like a can of dog food, I dunno.

Almost makes me wish that I was a TFer to upvote the headline. Made me shoot pop outta my nose.

/burns

erewhon: Marcus Aurelius: What is it about cops and dogs? They love shooting other peoples dogs, but you say a word about their mutt and they go all psycho. My local K-9 officer goes apeshiat if you go near his car when the dog's in it. We're lucky he hasn't killed anyone yet.

They get even weirder if the dog picks you out to like.

Was in Huntsville and they were doing a dog demo as part of a project we were debating working on. The handler was giving us the thing about how the dog wouldn't respond to anyone but him bla bla, and the dog was walking down the line of us showing how the dog could spot drugs or whatnot. Then the dog looked over her shoulder at me, I grinned back, and the dog rears up, puts her paws on my shoulders and starts tongue washing my face and wagging like old home week. Then she starts running around me arfing and hip bumping me.

The guy went apoplectic about patting the dog. Hell, I DID pat the dog, but only after she decided she knew me or whatever. Or maybe I just smell like a can of dog food, I dunno.

I dated a girl in high school who smelled like dog food.

Happy Birthday!

voraciously vows vengeance

Needs pedobear ps.

Ask why the police need a dog at a parade, get chewed on. Sounds about right in this day and age. He just wasn't properly intimidated

Cop was putting his life on the line trying to protect the ungrateful public comma dammit.

/could have had a snowball with ice inside

erewhon: The guy went apoplectic about patting the dog. Hell, I DID pat the dog, but only after she decided she knew me or whatever. Or maybe I just smell like a can of dog food, I dunno.

biatches know about your dog food smell.

Thousands of years from now the anthropologists apologists will be explaining how cute and endearing it was to roll up spheres of ice crystals and stacking them into a near humanoid shape because that's all they could understand.

tetsoushima: I dated a girl in high school who smelled like dog food.

For how long?

Wow, Chestertown MD, my mom's hometown. Never thought I'd read about anything going on there online, much less here on fark.

//I'd tell her about it, but she probably hasn't heard of fark either.

zerkalo: Ask why the police need a dog at a parade, get chewed on. Sounds about right in this day and age. He just wasn't properly intimidated



He must smell my dog!

tetsoushima: I dated a girl in high school who smelled like dog food.

Is that better or worse than cat food?

Frosty the Golem
Was a monster made of snow
With a corn cob pipe and a button nose
And two eyes without a soul

CT_Kirk: tetsoushima: I dated a girl in high school who smelled like dog food.

Is that better or worse than cat food?

I don't know. I've never tasted cat food, unless you count sardines in mustard sauce.

Norad: Tough shiat, Frosty. Once you engage the police on their bad side, it almost always leads to that magical of all charges...'disorderly conduct'.

Magical? Like Santa and pepper-sprayin' all the good little girls and boys?

It's the most, won-der-ful time of the yeeeear!

zerkalo: Ask why the police need a dog at a parade, get chewed on. Sounds about right in this day and age. He just wasn't properly intimidated

Hell, they treat the dogs more like people than they treat the public. Doing anything to a K-9 gets you the same charges and convictions as doing anything to an officer, the only difference is the dog doesn't have to take the stand.

Genju: [i.dailymail.co.uk image 224x309]

Needs pedobear ps.

It looks like they just saw Chris Hansen

Arrrrgh! Temperatures above 32 degrees- my ONLY WEAKNESS!!!

erewhon: Marcus Aurelius: What is it about cops and dogs? They love shooting other peoples dogs, but you say a word about their mutt and they go all psycho. My local K-9 officer goes apeshiat if you go near his car when the dog's in it. We're lucky he hasn't killed anyone yet.

They get even weirder if the dog picks you out to like.

Was in Huntsville and they were doing a dog demo as part of a project we were debating working on. The handler was giving us the thing about how the dog wouldn't respond to anyone but him bla bla, and the dog was walking down the line of us showing how the dog could spot drugs or whatnot. Then the dog looked over her shoulder at me, I grinned back, and the dog rears up, puts her paws on my shoulders and starts tongue washing my face and wagging like old home week. Then she starts running around me arfing and hip bumping me.

The guy went apoplectic about patting the dog. Hell, I DID pat the dog, but only after she decided she knew me or whatever. Or maybe I just smell like a can of dog food, I dunno.

Hell, you're lucky you didn't get a cavity search for the drugs you so obviously had in your possession.

(new window)

Maybe it was a drug-sniffing dog? What with the perp's name being Frosty the "Snow" Man, after all.

Headline of the Year - Christmas Edition

I'm local to the story. The guy arrested has mental issues and a LONG history of run-ins with the cops. I'm pretty sure his probation officer is going to be pissed off, as will the judge.

Arklop: [images.wikia.com image 255x350]

Came for Clayfighter refrence.
Left Satisfied.