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(io9)   Prison inmates use dominoes for natural male enhancement. Unfortunately for them the pieces didn't quite fall in place and caused unwanted domino (side)effects   (io9.com) divider line 65
    More: Fail, male enhancement, prisons  
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10684 clicks; posted to Geek » on 26 Nov 2011 at 5:49 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



65 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2011-11-26 05:54:39 PM
just doesnt stack up!

they thought others would line up for this?

got nuttin
 
2011-11-26 05:58:06 PM
Reminds me of my family's favorite drinking game: Mexican Train (new window)

/woo woo
 
2011-11-26 06:00:04 PM
No matter how much you try, you'll never find anything greater than a six.

/and no, you can't count the six on the backside.
 
2011-11-26 06:03:52 PM
I know a guy who had something like that done in the joint. They melted, I think he said, plastic from cutlery into a diamond shape about the size of a lucky charm marshmallow, and put it into his penis near the base. He says the ladies love it as it is in the exact spot to provide clitoral stimulation during missionary intercourse. It seemed to heal up ok (yeah, he showed us) but still he took one hell of a chance. NOT the place you want an infection.

/csb
 
2011-11-26 06:10:58 PM

beerbaron: I know a guy who had something like that done in the joint. They melted, I think he said, plastic from cutlery into a diamond shape about the size of a lucky charm marshmallow, and put it into his penis near the base. He says the ladies love it as it is in the exact spot to provide clitoral stimulation during missionary intercourse. It seemed to heal up ok (yeah, he showed us) but still he took one hell of a chance. NOT the place you want an infection.

/csb


That's certainly a lot to process.
 
2011-11-26 06:12:37 PM

beerbaron: I know a guy who had something like that done in the joint. They melted, I think he said, plastic from cutlery into a diamond shape about the size of a lucky charm marshmallow, and put it into his penis near the base. He says the ladies love it as it is in the exact spot to provide clitoral stimulation during missionary intercourse. It seemed to heal up ok (yeah, he showed us) but still he took one hell of a chance. NOT the place you want an infection.

/csb


I'm sure that's why men in prisons do that. Absolutely. For the ladies.
 
2011-11-26 06:13:35 PM

DarthBrooks: No matter how much you try, you'll never find anything greater than a six.


Pfft.

www.malachimedia.com
 
2011-11-26 06:14:04 PM
Dl they scream 'domino motherfarker' when they finish?
 
2011-11-26 06:18:33 PM
Natural? Where do dominoes grow?
 
2011-11-26 06:20:39 PM
So that's why black guys are bigger.....
 
2011-11-26 06:24:24 PM
slurmed.com

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!

/AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
 
2011-11-26 06:27:40 PM

Scruffinator: Reminds me of my family's favorite drinking game: Mexican Train (new window)

/woo woo


What are the rules for drinking during play? The game is so damn tedious and boring that every time the in-laws want to play I want a drink.
 
2011-11-26 06:29:14 PM
wait this seems more like a politics or maybe sports topic
 
2011-11-26 06:32:22 PM

inkblot: [slurmed.com image 640x480]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!

/AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!


This.
 
2011-11-26 06:37:06 PM
He likes bones, so he stuck a bone in his bone so he could play bones while he boned.
 
2011-11-26 06:41:18 PM
Criminals are dumb and have small dicks? I thought we were making fun of Ric on the main page today.
 
2011-11-26 06:54:18 PM
Darwinism in action.
 
2011-11-26 07:01:00 PM
fta: "I wonder if these findings apply to Mah Jongg tiles as well."

Well, then they would be... Mah Dongg tiles.
 
2011-11-26 07:05:26 PM
All I could do was laugh.
 
2011-11-26 07:05:40 PM
I worked in the engineering dept of a manufacturing company and my boss and at least two other educated men within that office believed they had a bone within their penis. It was me and I think one other person that thought knew otherwise.

/not cool at all story, bro
 
2011-11-26 07:11:52 PM
So there is something worse than prison rape after all.

ow. ow. ow. ow. ow. ow. ow. ow. ow. ow. ow. ow. ow.
 
2011-11-26 07:12:25 PM
In the central Fl jails they use little pieces of toothbrush and a razor blade .or so I've been told by some of our felonious employees .
/Razor blade to the dick by jailhouse surgeon /
FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUU
 
2011-11-26 07:37:45 PM
What?
 
2011-11-26 07:45:16 PM
Have they fallen like a house of cards?

/checkmate
 
2011-11-26 07:54:00 PM
A proper gentleman prefers a discreet PA ring so as not to embarrass oneself during parole hearings....
 
2011-11-26 08:09:29 PM
Came expecting a reference to "Spotted Dick".
 
2011-11-26 08:15:55 PM
I work corrections.
We had one try to perform this operation on himself.
Two days later his little friend looked like an eggplant-we laughed and taunted him as we drove him to a hospital to have the offending piece of plastic cut out.
 
2011-11-26 08:23:47 PM

Herr Flick's Revenge: I work corrections.
We had one try to perform this operation on himself.
Two days later his little friend looked like an eggplant-we laughed and taunted him as we drove him to a hospital to have the offending piece of plastic cut out.


Yeah. Worst case scenario, the offender gets some fresh air, a change of scenery and might get to smell a nurses hair.
 
2011-11-26 08:29:21 PM
Jeez, I read an article about some South Asian or South Pacific nation where men were having plastic beads or ball bearings inserted in there but this is even skeezier than that. Yech.
 
2011-11-26 08:30:00 PM
I could swear I read something around here about prisoners somewhere in asia adding a number of pearls over the course of their sentence.
 
2011-11-26 08:33:01 PM

irgunner: Yeah. Worst case scenario, the offender gets some fresh air, a change of scenery and might get to smell a nurses hair.


AND CHUNKS OF PLASTIC EMBEDDED IN HIS INFECTED PENIS!!!
 
2011-11-26 08:34:44 PM
1.bp.blogspot.com
Has a better idea.


/Hot.
 
2011-11-26 09:00:17 PM
*Reads article*

*Crosses legs protectively*

*Vomits*

/Nononononononononononononononononononononononononononon.
/No.
 
2011-11-26 09:25:40 PM

Summer Glau's Love Slave: *Reads article*

*Crosses legs protectively*

*Vomits*

/Nononononononononononononononononononononononononononon.
/No.


The article promised penises and prisons... I avoided clicking.

dl.dropbox.com

/Mac Hall saved my fragile little mind.
 
2011-11-26 09:58:13 PM
A) Ow. Ow. Ow.
B) Who knew splitting your penis open with a piece of plastic might cause infection. (Majorly side-splitting sarcasm there).

Not the smartest guys, eh?
 
2011-11-26 10:20:59 PM
Ouch?
 
2011-11-26 10:46:36 PM

Herr Flick's Revenge: I work corrections.
We had one try to perform this operation on himself.
Two days later his little friend looked like an eggplant-we laughed and taunted him as we drove him to a hospital to have the offending piece of plastic cut out.


Congrats, how does it feel to be human garbage? While I'm sure the people you "watch over" are worse than you, that doesn't ameliorate the fact that you're an uncaring piece of filth that should probably be put down in the interest of advancing our species.
 
2011-11-26 11:19:42 PM

Fail in Human Form: Herr Flick's Revenge: I work corrections.
We had one try to perform this operation on himself.
Two days later his little friend looked like an eggplant-we laughed and taunted him as we drove him to a hospital to have the offending piece of plastic cut out.

Congrats, how does it feel to be human garbage? While I'm sure the people you "watch over" are worse than you, that doesn't ameliorate the fact that you're an uncaring piece of filth that should probably be put down in the interest of advancing our species.


www.dcresource.com
 
2011-11-26 11:20:26 PM
I don't think I could cut into my dick if my life depended upon it.
 
2011-11-26 11:24:10 PM

Fail in Human Form: Herr Flick's Revenge: I work corrections.
We had one try to perform this operation on himself.
Two days later his little friend looked like an eggplant-we laughed and taunted him as we drove him to a hospital to have the offending piece of plastic cut out.

Congrats, how does it feel to be human garbage? While I'm sure the people you "watch over" are worse than you, that doesn't ameliorate the fact that you're an uncaring piece of filth that should probably be put down in the interest of advancing our species.


Lighten up Francis. Notice this was not a victim, he put bits of plastic in his own penis.

Also notice Herr Flick laughed while driving him to hospital. Not quite an uncaring act.
 
2011-11-26 11:24:59 PM

Fail in Human Form: Herr Flick's Revenge: I work corrections.
We had one try to perform this operation on himself.
Two days later his little friend looked like an eggplant-we laughed and taunted him as we drove him to a hospital to have the offending piece of plastic cut out.

Congrats, how does it feel to be human garbage? While I'm sure the people you "watch over" are worse than you, that doesn't ameliorate the fact that you're an uncaring piece of filth that should probably be put down in the interest of advancing our species.


When stupid people intentionally do stupid things to themselves, they more than deserve our ridicule. You know, in the interest of advancing our species. Your name seems oddly appropriate right now. Also, I think I just got trolled.
 
2011-11-27 12:08:26 AM

some.old.lady.: fta: "I wonder if these findings apply to Mah Jongg tiles as well."

Well, then they would be... Mah Dongg tiles.


[golf_clap.gif]
 
2011-11-27 12:16:10 AM
A modified plastic penile enhancement performed in prison?

Wow. Just wow.
 
2011-11-27 12:18:51 AM

Wretschko: A modified plastic penile enhancement performed in prison?

Wow. Just wow.


Wow. Just Wow
 
2011-11-27 12:24:43 AM
WAT
 
2011-11-27 12:36:39 AM

Fail in Human Form: Herr Flick's Revenge: I work corrections.
We had one try to perform this operation on himself.
Two days later his little friend looked like an eggplant-we laughed and taunted him as we drove him to a hospital to have the offending piece of plastic cut out.

Congrats, how does it feel to be human garbage? While I'm sure the people you "watch over" are worse than you, that doesn't ameliorate the fact that you're an uncaring piece of filth that should probably be put down in the interest of advancing our species.


Feels pretty dam good, moron.
You are more than welcome to come and try the last bit of your statement, sweet pea.
 
2011-11-27 12:46:50 AM

Herr Flick's Revenge: I work corrections.
We had one try to perform this operation on himself.
Two days later his little friend looked like an eggplant-we laughed and taunted him as we drove him to a hospital to have the offending piece of plastic cut out.


So, basically, you're a d*ck.
 
2011-11-27 12:51:52 AM

Richard Saunders: Herr Flick's Revenge: I work corrections.
We had one try to perform this operation on himself.
Two days later his little friend looked like an eggplant-we laughed and taunted him as we drove him to a hospital to have the offending piece of plastic cut out.

So, basically, you're a d*ck.


Truth be told.....At least he still has one
 
2011-11-27 12:57:53 AM

irgunner: Herr Flick's Revenge: I work corrections.
We had one try to perform this operation on himself.
Two days later his little friend looked like an eggplant-we laughed and taunted him as we drove him to a hospital to have the offending piece of plastic cut out.

Yeah. Worst case scenario, the offender gets some fresh air, a change of scenery and might get to smell a nurses hair.


I work at a therapeutic community-the Residents live in military style barracks and get to walk around outside all day.
But yeah, change of scenery(staring at hospital ceiling) and getting groped by a nurse is about right.
 
2011-11-27 01:35:22 AM
incarcerated Hispanic male or fellow inmate

A little male-on-male love in the joint, amigos?
 
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