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(KTLA Los Angeles)   Landscapers chop down tree at church, find shape of cross throughout trunk. Says one, "It's God and mother nature working together." (w/ pic)   (ktla.com) divider line 156
    More: Sappy, god, landscaping, Escondido, More Stories, stumps, nature working  
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16560 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Nov 2011 at 2:54 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2011-11-23 04:31:29 PM  

Deucednuisance: [media.trb.com image 400x225]

To me the two on the top look like WWII-era bombers spraying chemtrails.

The one on the bottom looks like Olive Oyl reading a folded newspaper.

Guess I see things a little "different".


Looks like a three-headed dildo to me
 
2011-11-23 04:31:56 PM  

offmymeds: Give the pic a 180 degree turn. What do you get?

[i1136.photobucket.com image 400x225]

Could it be, oh I don't know...

[i1136.photobucket.com image 432x360]


They actually look like flowers upside down.
 
2011-11-23 04:34:23 PM  
FerneJohn: I remember when they found a few "crosses" in the remnants of the WTC and decided it was miracle

Maybe they were just X's -- like X marks the spot. Was God leaving a bookmark? Something along the lines of 'I'll get back to this later; I've got some errands to run.'
 
2011-11-23 04:37:15 PM  
Once again, we have indisputable proof of the truth and wisdom of the church.

And, like the tree, it is leaning over and threatening people's safety. It must be removed. At it's core is a thick vein of disease. I suggest the church sell the wood to raise money for children's programs. Let's call it "Wood for Little Boys".
 
2011-11-23 04:39:41 PM  
If producing a half assed cross inside a tree is the best god can do nowadays I say shame! Shame, god, shame! You used to be able to split the Red Sea, turn a stick into a living snake, have angels in chariots of fire come down from the heavens! Now this? A lame cross like figure in a tree? God; you suck. Youre prime is over. You're the Brett Farve of gods. TIme to retire. We all remember when you were young you were champ, but you are a weak shell of your former self. Retire. It can only get worse.
 
2011-11-23 04:41:34 PM  

JacobDavidWatson: If producing a half assed cross inside a tree is the best god can do nowadays I say shame! Shame, god, shame! You used to be able to split the Red Sea, turn a stick into a living snake, have angels in chariots of fire come down from the heavens! Now this? A lame cross like figure in a tree? God; you suck. Your prime is over. You're the Brett Farve of gods. TIme to retire. We all remember when you were young you were champ, but you are a weak shell of your former self. Retire. It can only get worse.

 
2011-11-23 04:48:44 PM  
Saw those babies up into coasters and sell them to the true believers.

. WE'LL MAKE MILLIONS!!
 
2011-11-23 04:51:11 PM  
s3.amazonaws.com

/Definitive Proof!
 
2011-11-23 04:53:30 PM  

Austinoftx: Let's call it "Wood for Little Boys".


Think Big, man! You could branch out and make this a real fundraiser! What about selling slabs at athletic events? "Sportin' Wood"! A delivery service? "Gettin' Wood!" Or, if the customers want to pick-up "We Got Yer Wood, Right Here!" The possibilities are endless!
 
2011-11-23 05:02:21 PM  
What are the odds that the landscaper who cut down tree was named Jesus?
 
2011-11-23 05:07:19 PM  
It was a plant!
 
2011-11-23 05:10:46 PM  

MaliFinn: It's one of those things where you see what you want to see.
...

Or something less important, maybe the tree was a big Jimi Hendrix fan
[img828.imageshack.us image 430x262]


BEST
 
2011-11-23 05:17:03 PM  
I guess the real lesson here is that the guy will be able to slice that tree up and laminate each slice and sell them to gullible believers for $50.00 each.

It's the lords way.
 
2011-11-23 05:19:33 PM  

Ooba Tooba: I had a dream that a blob of cookie dough peeled from my ceiling and drooped onto a silver platter on my living room floor. The dough took the shape of my own head and started spinning slowly, speaking my own name each time it revolved,"ooba tooba, ooba tooba." Pretty obvious it was the lords work.


I'd have been more impressed if it said "THERRRRRE IIIIIS NOOOO SAAANCTUARRY!"
 
2011-11-23 05:20:40 PM  

JRoo: I guess the real lesson here is that the guy will be able to slice that tree up and laminate each slice and sell them to gullible believers for $50.00 each.

It's the lords way.


I guess someone else planted that "faith seed", and he's reaping God's reward.
 
2011-11-23 05:27:46 PM  
Did you hear Jesus weeping when you cut down the tree? Yeah, thanks a lot Jesus loves trees more than anything.

FerneJohn: "Two lines stuck together" is not a complex pattern. I remember when they found a few "crosses" in the remnants of the WTC and decided it was miracle... because simple load bearing structures were somehow miraculous.


Especially when they completely fail. It's a miracle!
 
2011-11-23 05:38:44 PM  
"I was like wow we stumbled on something here,"

Yes, you surely did.
 
2011-11-23 05:39:53 PM  
The amount of stupid in that article... I just..
 
2011-11-23 05:41:09 PM  
Damn! Now what will we use for the crucifixion this Friday? We were going to run a three for one special.
 
2011-11-23 05:41:53 PM  
superstition, any one who attributes a causality other than the laws of nature, as created by their infinite god, is merely portraying a sign of a superstition and nothing of religious significants. On the other hand if they just said, "isn't this cool?" and left it at that, they would not be promoting superstitions.
 
2011-11-23 06:09:01 PM  
If there was a supreme being, you would have to wonder what he thinks of this species.

homo internetus is probably a dead end.
 
2011-11-23 06:10:18 PM  

Farking Canuck: Marine1: Another "Atheism is my religion" thread. Woo.

/the tree makes the guy happy, what do you care?

Mocking stupidity make me happy.

/why do you care??


So what's dumber: being a contributing, happy member of society that just happens to believe that this was some sort of divine sign, or being a miserable misanthrope that thinks he/she is better than others because "LOL HAVE FUN TALKING TO YOUR SKY WIZARD".

People blowing up pizza parlors because they think God told them to is wrong. People taking other people's land because they think God told them to is wrong. Some guy finding a little bit of happiness in how a tree formed its rings is fine. You're looking in the wrong places to solve the problems of the world.

trekkiecougar:

I can't speak for others but I am not an atheist. I just think that the abrahamic faiths' version of god (among others) is a major asswipe.


Compared to most higher powers, the Abrahamic God (Lord/Yahweh/Allah) is actually a very benevolent being. Sends prophets to warn of problems ahead of time and even sacrifices a son for the good of mankind, at least according to some of the beliefs of the Abrahamic faiths. Compare this to tribal religions or mysticism, where the higher power is some dude that blows the top of a volcano off because your priest did the wrong moves in his forgiveness dance. Beyond that, there are a whole lot of higher powers that humanity believed in that just didn't care about humans at all. The Abrahamic assertion that God is active and has made sacrifices for humanity makes that God one of the nicest gods man has ever believed in.

/take that as you will
//not that there aren't scripture-based examples of said God blowing a gasket
 
2011-11-23 06:25:12 PM  
Mother Nature would like nothing better than to ram a full grown Xmas tree up the ass of every Christian alive.
 
2011-11-23 06:25:12 PM  
There is a God, he has a sense of humor, and we are his joke.
 
2011-11-23 06:35:20 PM  
Looks like one of these on a pedestal:

i249.photobucket.com

All praise Ahura-Mazda!
 
2011-11-23 06:44:21 PM  

phlegmmo: "To see something like this on church property around Thanksgiving time seems to be more than a coincidence," said Pastor Corr.


It's NOT coincidence, though; millions of years of evolution have caused us to see images in things that aren't really there... -->

epyonyx: There is a God, he has a sense of humor, and we are his joke.


We are a carefully-controlled experiment... that went totally wrong
 
2011-11-23 06:47:52 PM  
(not the article I was lookin' for, but close enough)
 
2011-11-23 07:08:20 PM  
Looks more like a bird to me.

Also, a cross? It's an incredibly common shape. If they found the face of Jesus in there, it might have been noteworthy (not "miraculous," but something you don't see every day,) but a cross? They're going to pull something reaching that far.

/Xian
//Is really annoyed by his brothers persistent need for validation
 
2011-11-23 07:12:01 PM  

imbrial: Shame all you doubters! The lulzy opportunity to use the sappy tag is surely a sign of His divine providence !


That's probably more of a divine miracle than anything that showed up in the tree.

Because the "cross" looks more like a pressed butterfly, really.
 
2011-11-23 07:14:23 PM  

Coelacanth: Mother Nature would like nothing better than to ram a full grown Xmas tree up the ass of every Christian Xian alive.


FTFY, Trolly.
 
2011-11-23 07:18:29 PM  
Aww, that's cute.

/We Pagans see the Goddess in sunsets, the moon, and all sorts of other pretty natural stuff, so...
 
2011-11-23 07:29:19 PM  
*monotone*
A pretty butterfly.
/*monotone*
 
2011-11-23 07:36:55 PM  

PsiChick: Aww, that's cute.

/We Pagans see the Goddess in sunsets, the moon, and all sorts of other pretty natural stuff, so...


That's a different mental disorder. It was more common several thousand years ago. You don't see that around as much these days.
 
2011-11-23 08:08:58 PM  

Coelacanth: Mother Nature would like nothing better than to ram a full grown Xmas tree up the ass of every Christian alive.


34. No. Exceptions.
 
2011-11-23 08:14:19 PM  

IgG4: Dang, God is gonna be pissed that they chopped down that tree.


Yeah, imagine how silly they feel once they find out they are doomed to eternal damnation for killing the "Jesus Tree".
 
2011-11-23 08:21:34 PM  

heavymetal: Yeah, imagine how silly they feel once they find out they are doomed to eternal damnation for killing the "Jesus Tree".


Imagine how upset they... won't be when they die and find out NOTHING because they're dead!
 
2011-11-23 08:24:33 PM  

Marine1: Some guy finding a little bit of happiness in how

delusional about a tree formed its rings is not fine.

ftfy
 
2011-11-23 08:44:19 PM  

Marine1: People blowing up pizza parlors because they think God told them to is wrong. People taking other people's land because they think God told them to is wrong. Some guy finding a little bit of happiness in how a tree formed its rings is fine. You're looking in the wrong places to solve the problems of the world.


Not looking to solve any problems. Just mocking people for their obvious pareidolia (new window).

It is the same as when I mock people who put tattoos on their faces, commit crimes and then get busted because they were so easy to identify. I like to laugh at internet tough-guys, idiot girls who believe their boyfriends when they say "I won't show this video to anyone", and teenagers who can't outrun the police because they have their pants hanging down below their asses.

Just because these idiots are religious they do not get a free pass. They will be thoroughly mocked; they've earned it with their stupidity.
 
2011-11-23 09:33:39 PM  
Marine1

Compared to most higher powers, the Abrahamic God (Lord/Yahweh/Allah) is actually a very benevolent being.


One of the bigger stories in his biography is where he kills every single person on earth except for one family. You have an incredibly twisted definition of benevolence if you think he can fit it in any way.
 
2011-11-23 10:00:25 PM  
I thought it looked like the Blue Fairy.
 
2011-11-23 10:07:10 PM  
OK, just so i'm not the only one who thinks the bottom part of that "cross" looks like a fat peener...

/how YOU doin'?
 
2011-11-23 10:27:06 PM  

barefoot in the head: Xenomech: bugontherug: My aunt died a death of brain cancer that more excruciating for than it was for my mother, and my grandparents who maintained a vigil at the hospital in the final hours of her life. They prayed hard for a miracle to keep her alive, and end her suffering. But their prayers were to no avail.

So God can't answer a prayer from devoted Christians to cure their loved one, and spare her and them some pain. But he has plenty of time to put watermark crosses inside trees on church property.

God did answer the prayer. The answer was you can't pray away a tumour. You have to know what is really being asked and what is really answering. It is hidden in plain view, and it is not named.


I don't know of you're being serious or not, but this is the sort of thing that really pisses me off about the religious. Good people suffer, some of whom have worshipped God in some form or another and have spent every day living as their religion tells them. They get sick and suffer horribly, constantly praying for relief. And they all get exactly the same thing: nothing.

Then they or their family are told that "God works in mysterious ways" and "It's not our place to question God" or "He has a plan" and "God needed another angel in heaven."

Well fark you and your plans and angels. fark you when you tell a five year old kid that his father is gone because God needed him in heaven. Go to hell when you tell a 45 year old mother of two that she's dying a painful death from cancer as her kids and family watch helplessly because it's God's will.

If God can't provide relief then he is not omnipotent. If he won't he's a sadistic SOB. Maybe he's too busy giving out Oscars and touchdowns.
 
2011-11-23 10:51:50 PM  

DeerNuts:
If God can't provide relief then he is not omnipotent. If he won't he's a sadistic SOB. Maybe he's too busy giving out Oscars and touchdowns.




Marry me.

/unless you're a dude
//or a chick
///been married twice, it just sucks......
////but I agree whole heartedly with your point ;-)
 
2011-11-23 10:57:49 PM  
"The pine stumps have made national headlines with religious believers from North Carolina and Florida wanting to buy the wood."

Time to start cutting down trees with branches that are growing in such a way that they look like a cross to some inbred retards. Because that is what causes that shape, the branches. Yet people want to buy these things! Idiots.
 
2011-11-23 11:51:02 PM  
DeerNuts I don't know of you're being serious or not, but this is the sort of thing that really pisses me off about the religious. Good people suffer, some of whom have worshipped God in some form or another and have spent every day living as their religion tells them. They get sick and suffer horribly, constantly praying for relief. And they all get exactly the same thing: nothing.

Then they or their family are told that "God works in mysterious ways" and "It's not our place to question God" or "He has a plan" and "God needed another angel in heaven."

Well fark you and your plans and angels. fark you when you tell a five year old kid that his father is gone because God needed him in heaven. Go to hell when you tell a 45 year old mother of two that she's dying a painful death from cancer as her kids and family watch helplessly because it's God's will.

If God can't provide relief then he is not omnipotent. If he won't he's a sadistic SOB. Maybe he's too busy giving out Oscars and touchdowns.


Funny, no matter how many times I clarify the meaning, and I've spent a lot of time on Fark clarifying, there is always a lineup of angry people to take what I say and turn into advocating for religion. I keep saying, "no you don't grasp my meaning", and even though you keep proving me right, you insist that you know I am defending some church. You have no idea what you are reading. You could just say that. I am not championing or denying anything you are angry about. It is something altogether different. The church doesn't see it, the atheists don't see it - anyone who clings to anything conceptual does not see it.
 
2011-11-24 12:19:06 AM  

Whiskey Dickens:

Since when is Thanksgiving a religious holiday?


since you asked...

Whereas it is the duty of all Nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey his will, to be grateful for his benefits, and humbly to implore his protection and favor-- and whereas both Houses of Congress have by their joint Committee requested me to recommend to the People of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many signal favors of Almighty God especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness.

Now therefore I do recommend and assign Thursday the 26th day of November next to be devoted by the People of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being, who is the beneficent Author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be-- That we may then all unite in rendering unto him our sincere and humble thanks--for his kind care and protection of the People of this Country previous to their becoming a Nation--for the signal and manifold mercies, and the favorable interpositions of his Providence which we experienced in the course and conclusion of the late war--for the great degree of tranquility, union, and plenty, which we have since enjoyed--for the peaceable and rational manner, in which we have been enabled to establish constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national One now lately instituted--for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed; and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge; and in general for all the great and various favors which he hath been pleased to confer upon us.

and also that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations and beseech him to pardon our national and other transgressions-- to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually--to render our national government a blessing to all the people, by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed--to protect and guide all Sovereigns and Nations (especially such as have shewn kindness unto us) and to bless them with good government, peace, and concord--To promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the encrease of science among them and us--and generally to grant unto all Mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as he alone knows to be best.

Given under my hand at the City of New York the third day of October in the year of our Lord 1789.

-President George Washington.
 
2011-11-24 01:55:52 AM  
I wish the Romans had used some other execution method whose shape wouldn't turn up naturally in every single farking thing.
 
2011-11-24 03:08:11 AM  
"The pine stumps have made national headlines with religious believers from North Carolina and Florida wanting to buy the wood"

Read your own Bible, people. Saying that objects are holy and worshiping them is forbidden.
 
2011-11-24 09:02:01 AM  

barefoot in the head: The church doesn't see it, the atheists don't see it - anyone who clings to anything conceptual does not see it.


Wow ... you're special.

/as in 'short bus' special
 
2011-11-24 10:25:38 AM  

Farking Canuck: barefoot in the head: The church doesn't see it, the atheists don't see it - anyone who clings to anything conceptual does not see it.

Wow ... you're special.

/as in 'short bus' special


And what do you base that self-stroking gem upon? Do you think I am saying something that has never been said before? Something I invented? It is nothing new, from an intellectual standpoint - but then, that's the problem.

But it's it's easier to call me tard, lol.
 
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