FARK.com: (6751773) You ask your neighbor for $2. They decline. Do you A) Say thanks anyway and leave, B) Ask for $5, C) Stab them in the back and leave them for dead. Difficulty: 2 out of 3

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		You ask your neighbor for $2. They decline. Do you A) Say thanks anyway and leave, B) Ask for $5, C) Stab them in the back and leave them for dead. Difficulty: 2 out of 3 (orlandosentinel.com)		61
		More: Florida, Oakland Park, Broward Sheriff's Office, stabs, Broward General Medical Center

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61 Comments (+0 »)

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brigid_fitch

2011-11-21 03:43:45 PM

obligatory:

28.media.tumblr.com

Diogenes

2011-11-21 04:18:23 PM

I bet you she didn't say "please."

When I lived in a condo one of my neighbors whom I had never met came to my door late at night and wanted to know if I'd drive her to Pleasure Island at Disney. She was really confused that I wouldn't.

Thelyphthoric

2011-11-21 05:13:01 PM

Done in one.
/last one out, turn off the lights please.

Treygreen13

2011-11-21 05:15:03 PM

Diogenes: I bet you she didn't say "please."

When I lived in a condo one of my neighbors whom I had never met came to my door late at night and wanted to know if I'd drive her to Pleasure Island at Disney. She was really confused that I wouldn't.

One day I came home from work and found my neighbor (who was a Flight Attendant) naked from the waist down (still had her shoes on though) and dead asleep on her front porch. Her keys were in the door and her cat was staring at her from the window.

I woke her up to ask her if she was ok, and she looked at me like I was a total weirdo for waking somebody up in the middle of a nap.

here to help

2011-11-21 05:18:15 PM

She sounds "meth-y".

Diogenes

2011-11-21 05:18:20 PM

Treygreen13: I woke her up to ask her if she was ok, and she looked at me like I was a total weirdo for waking somebody up in the middle of a nap.

In my case the lady was loaded. I would have blown up the complex if I'd lit a match.

In yours, I wonder if it was a case of confusion mixed with embarrassment.

scottydoesntknow

2011-11-21 05:18:31 PM

Treygreen13: Diogenes: I bet you she didn't say "please."

When I lived in a condo one of my neighbors whom I had never met came to my door late at night and wanted to know if I'd drive her to Pleasure Island at Disney. She was really confused that I wouldn't.

One day I came home from work and found my neighbor (who was a Flight Attendant) naked from the waist down (still had her shoes on though) and dead asleep on her front porch. Her keys were in the door and her cat was staring at her from the window.

~~I woke her up to ask her if she was ok, and she looked at me like I was a total weirdo for waking somebody up in the middle of a nap.~~ JACKPOT!

FTFY

jakomo002

2011-11-21 05:18:45 PM

What the ---?

Was she carrying the steak knife WHILE she was asking for the 5$?

I mean, if one of my neighbours strolled up to my door, carrying a farking steak knife, and asked if she could borrow 5$, I'd probably give her 10, and then watch her from behind the curtains until she went into her house and then just sit there and think WTF just happened.

Then maybe keep a Louisville by the door if it ever happened again.

"Uh, no, no I don't. And me and my bat would like our 10$ back."

Treygreen13

2011-11-21 05:19:41 PM

Diogenes: Treygreen13: I woke her up to ask her if she was ok, and she looked at me like I was a total weirdo for waking somebody up in the middle of a nap.

In my case the lady was loaded. I would have blown up the complex if I'd lit a match.

In yours, I wonder if it was a case of confusion mixed with embarrassment.

I imagine alcohol was a factor in my situation too, but she had fallen asleep outside so probably didn't reek of the booze.

How late was it when she asked to go to Disney?

royone

2011-11-21 05:20:22 PM

She's as attractive as she is successful.

here to help

2011-11-21 05:21:52 PM

royone: She's as attractive as she is successful.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 250x262]

GAH!

Treygreen13

2011-11-21 05:22:41 PM

royone: She's as attractive as she is successful.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 250x262]

Holy crap it's a Dark Elf.

Tymast

2011-11-21 05:22:44 PM

khadaffied him?

fusillade762

2011-11-21 05:24:19 PM

royone: She's as attractive as she is successful.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 250x262]

Tree fiddy?

jakomo002

2011-11-21 05:24:28 PM

Wow, she ACTUALLY has "I'ma stab you with a steak knife and leave you for dead in your front yeard while I just go back home" eyes.

Yikes

Diogenes

2011-11-21 05:24:45 PM

Treygreen13: Diogenes: Treygreen13: I woke her up to ask her if she was ok, and she looked at me like I was a total weirdo for waking somebody up in the middle of a nap.

In my case the lady was loaded. I would have blown up the complex if I'd lit a match.

In yours, I wonder if it was a case of confusion mixed with embarrassment.

I imagine alcohol was a factor in my situation too, but she had fallen asleep outside so probably didn't reek of the booze.

How late was it when she asked to go to Disney?

Like around 1:30 IIRC. It was a Friday so I was still up at least.

jmadisonbiii

2011-11-21 05:26:02 PM

...suffered another wound to the buttocks...

Prof. Frink

2011-11-21 05:26:07 PM

What if I get the right two but in the wrong order?

royone

2011-11-21 05:26:54 PM

Treygreen13: came to my door late at night and wanted to know if I'd drive her to Pleasure Island at Disney. She was really confused that I ~~wouldn't~~ didn't understand she was coming on to me.

FTFY

/Pleasure Island, man.

here to help

2011-11-21 05:28:39 PM

Maybe I... zuk yer dick.

Somaticasual

2011-11-21 05:29:29 PM

But it's nice to know the reptilians aren't racist. They're equal-opportunity cloners..

tinfoil-hat maggie

2011-11-21 05:30:21 PM

Treygreen13: Diogenes: I bet you she didn't say "please."

When I lived in a condo one of my neighbors whom I had never met came to my door late at night and wanted to know if I'd drive her to Pleasure Island at Disney. She was really confused that I wouldn't.

One day I came home from work and found my neighbor (who was a Flight Attendant) naked from the waist down (still had her shoes on though) and dead asleep on her front porch. Her keys were in the door and her cat was staring at her from the window.

I woke her up to ask her if she was ok, and she looked at me like I was a total weirdo for waking somebody up in the middle of a nap.

LoL, when I was in east Nashville a crackhead neighbor came over with a box of appliances asking $20 for the box well we did get a decent blender out of the deal.
/She got arrested and convicted after she brought her crack dealing boyfriend to live with her.
/It's said really

Arcturus72

2011-11-21 05:31:30 PM

royone: She's as attractive as she is successful.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 250x262]

Why am I not suprised at the crazy eyes?

If she did this over $2/5, wtf would she do to someone over a $20?

Thanks for the Meme-ries

2011-11-21 05:31:44 PM

here to help

2011-11-21 05:32:32 PM

Arcturus72: If she did this over $2/5, wtf would she do to someone over a $20?

Rape.

dothemath

2011-11-21 05:34:31 PM

Cocaine.

Its a....yeah you know.

albatros183

2011-11-21 05:36:53 PM

The answer is always C)

Hawnkee

2011-11-21 05:37:16 PM

ftfa: "He was not listed as a hospital patient on Monday afternoon."

This concerned me for some reason.

Bit'O'Gristle

2011-11-21 05:39:07 PM

Maybe she thought she was at the welfare office and got confused.

/throws out the line...waits.

jagec

2011-11-21 05:39:11 PM

Treygreen13: Diogenes: I bet you she didn't say "please."

When I lived in a condo one of my neighbors whom I had never met came to my door late at night and wanted to know if I'd drive her to Pleasure Island at Disney. She was really confused that I wouldn't.

One day I came home from work and found my neighbor (who was a Flight Attendant) naked from the waist down (still had her shoes on though) and dead asleep on her front porch. Her keys were in the door and her cat was staring at her from the window.

I woke her up to ask her if she was ok, and she looked at me like I was a total weirdo for waking somebody up in the middle of a nap.

What, the idea of Window Cat watching you masturbate wasn't a turn-on?

CalamitousCrasher

2011-11-21 05:39:18 PM

brigid_fitch: obligatory:

[28.media.tumblr.com image 500x367]

+1 internets to you, a winnar.

Treygreen13

2011-11-21 05:40:52 PM

jagec: What, the idea of Window Cat watching you masturbate wasn't a turn-on?

I guess I could have just walked up, cranked one out, and walked off.

But the thought did not cross my mind at the time.

/also that would be a terrible thing to do

pounddawg

2011-11-21 05:41:33 PM

royone: She's as attractive as she is successful.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 250x262]

She? That's a she?

Pootie-Poot

2011-11-21 05:47:24 PM

Have I ever told you all what happened to my friend when he went to Taco Bell with a $2 bill?

umad

2011-11-21 05:48:19 PM

Damn, somebody beat the piss out of her with an ugly stick. That is like "go shoot yourself because your face is a crime" ugly.

eggrolls

2011-11-21 05:50:23 PM

Guy should have told her his grandmother dropped acid that morning, kind of freaked out and hijacked a busload of penguins.

BarbadoSlim

2011-11-21 05:51:15 PM

brigid_fitch: obligatory:

[28.media.tumblr.com image 500x367]

Satisfied.

Brother Head

2011-11-21 05:58:14 PM

umad: Damn, somebody beat the piss out of her with an ugly stick. That is like "go shoot yourself because your face is a crime" ugly.

Ugly stick nothing. Looks like she ran through the Ugly Forest, blindfolded and at night... At high speed...

And to brigid_fitch, Thanks. I WANT MY TWO DOLLARS! Always good for a laugh.

Arcturus72

2011-11-21 06:22:28 PM

here to help: Arcturus72: If she did this over $2/5, wtf would she do to someone over a $20?

Rape.

You only said Rape once...

thomasvista

2011-11-21 06:28:41 PM

Another lovely day in Oakland Fart, Florida....

SanjiSasuke

2011-11-21 06:29:31 PM

Arcturus72: here to help: Arcturus72: If she did this over $2/5, wtf would she do to someone over a $20?

Rape.

You only said Rape once...

He doesn't care much for it.

fillg

2011-11-21 06:30:40 PM

My first thought was "D) Chase him down a ski slope on your bicycle."

Kazrath

2011-11-21 06:31:03 PM

Treygreen13: royone: She's as attractive as she is successful.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 250x262]

Holy crap it's a Dark Elf.

I LOL'ed

here to help

2011-11-21 06:44:26 PM

SanjiSasuke: Arcturus72: here to help: Arcturus72: If she did this over $2/5, wtf would she do to someone over a $20?

Rape.

You only said Rape once...

He doesn't care much for it.

Damn. I was gonna say that.

lulz

i only rape them with my eyes...

O O
|
__

ciberido

2011-11-21 06:54:17 PM

Diogenes: In my case the lady was loaded. I would have blown up the complex if I'd lit a match.

Sorry your mom blew up, Ricky.

Madaynun

2011-11-21 06:55:33 PM

Treygreen13: royone: She's as attractive as she is successful.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 250x262]

Holy crap it's a Dark Elf.

I'll have to try and recreate her as my next toon in Skyrim lol.

ciberido

2011-11-21 06:56:53 PM

eggrolls: Guy should have told her his grandmother dropped acid that morning, kind of freaked out and hijacked a busload of penguins.

That, or he should have put his testicles all over her. You know, like ze octopus.

fusillade762

2011-11-21 07:35:19 PM

Arcturus72: If she did this over $2/5, wtf would she do to someone over a $20?

Crush five obnoxious frat boys with a limo?

AbbeySomeone

2011-11-21 07:36:54 PM

royone: She's as attractive as she is successful.

[blogs.browardpalmbeach.com image 250x262]

Anyone that would open the door for that deserves to be stabbed.

dragonchild

2011-11-21 07:39:46 PM

You ask for $2, you ask for $5! That's the Chicago way!

Wait. . .

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