This is satire, right? This is Mother Jones' humor column, right?

Halal... Kosher... I don't care, that stuff tastes good.

We're concerned that turkey, a bird named after a Muslim country, might be secretly halal?

"I wouldn't knowingly buy a halal turkey -- would you?"

/there's nothing else to say
//meta-self-satire?

Arkanaut: We're concerned that turkey, a bird named after a Muslim country, might be secretly halal?

hehe I think the bird got its name first

Turkeys that are halal certified -- who wants that, especially on a day on which we are giving thanks to G-d for our freedom?

You've confused "you" with "we". We drink good beer and watch football. You can continue to enjoy your lame-o Thanksgiving.

thank g-d someone is standing up for the true g-d that us g-d fearing Americans love so much

Thanksgiving: "freedom and inclusiveness" now get your Muslim turkey off my table!

Farking wackjob.

If my Thanksgiving Turkey can't recite the Lord's Prayer, I won't eat it!

skullkrusher: Arkanaut: We're concerned that turkey, a bird named after a Muslim country, might be secretly halal?

hehe I think the bird got its name first

From wikipedia:
Oghuz Turks began migrating into the area now called Turkey (derived from the Medieval Latin Turchia, i.e. "Land of the Turks")

hillbillypharmacist: skullkrusher: hehe I think the bird got its name first

That's nobody's business but the turk(ey)s.

Good point. We should start calling them Constantinople Chickens

Pants full of macaroni!!: Gosh darn it. I had dinner at Aladdin's the other night. Guess that makes me a Terrorist.

I don't want to admit how many hours I spent being indoctrinated at Aladdin's Castle.

MSFT: skullkrusher: Arkanaut: We're concerned that turkey, a bird named after a Muslim country, might be secretly halal?

hehe I think the bird got its name first

From wikipedia:
Oghuz Turks began migrating into the area now called Turkey (derived from the Medieval Latin Turchia, i.e. "Land of the Turks")

yep

Turkeys contain tryptophan, which is a widely used into the muslim world as a catalyst to accelerate the muslim-conversion process. It also works as a jew repellent.

Philip Francis Queeg: If my Thanksgiving Turkey can't recite the Lord's Prayer, I won't eat it!

I read that in Colbert's voice.

skullkrusher: MSFT: skullkrusher: Arkanaut: We're concerned that turkey, a bird named after a Muslim country, might be secretly halal?

hehe I think the bird got its name first

From wikipedia:
Oghuz Turks began migrating into the area now called Turkey (derived from the Medieval Latin Turchia, i.e. "Land of the Turks")

yep

"When Europeans first encountered turkeys on the American continent, they incorrectly identified the birds as a type of guineafowl (Numididae). Guineafowl were also known as turkey fowl (or turkey hen and turkey cock) because they were imported to Central Europe through Turkey. "

hillbillypharmacist: skullkrusher: hehe I think the bird got its name first

That's nobody's business but the turk(ey)s.

cameroncrazy1984: Oh no! I might accidentally eat something a Muslim might also eat! THE HORROR!

I bet she hates kebabs.

Or worse, she probably hates baklava, which is just yummy gooey heaven!

aaronx: If you're worried about your turkey being halal, just put some bacon in the stuffing and quit yer whining.

Plus: it'll make the stuffing better. Cook the bacon first for, you know, safety flavor.

FTFY

/mine's gonna have bacon, apple, and cranberries

DarnoKonrad: skullkrusher: MSFT: skullkrusher: Arkanaut: We're concerned that turkey, a bird named after a Muslim country, might be secretly halal?

hehe I think the bird got its name first

From wikipedia:
Oghuz Turks began migrating into the area now called Turkey (derived from the Medieval Latin Turchia, i.e. "Land of the Turks")

yep

"When Europeans first encountered turkeys on the American continent, they incorrectly identified the birds as a type of guineafowl (Numididae). Guineafowl were also known as turkey fowl (or turkey hen and turkey cock) because they were imported to Central Europe through Turkey. "

and I humbly bow out

CSB Here in Berkeley I get most of our meat, 'cept pork of course, from this Halal place a few blocks away.

The shop is inexpensive and friendly. The chicken, lamb and beef are firmer and better tasting than the pink-sponge stuff sold at Safeway, and the animals are fed only vegetarian diets, not ground up animal parts. Evidently the slaughter methods are very similar to the Kosher practice, i.e. more humane.

Modern day Julius Streicher (Link (new window))..what a c**t.

Tremolo: Philip Francis Queeg: If my Thanksgiving Turkey can't recite the Lord's Prayer, I won't eat it!

I read that in Colbert's voice.

That, sir, makes two of us

It would be great if they had a special promotion and dropped them from the air all over the city.

Turkeys can fly, right?

I'm going to have falafel and mansaf for Thanksgiving, now, just to spite this stupid, stupid person.

/Also because falafel and mansaf are both delicious

skullkrusher: hillbillypharmacist: skullkrusher: hehe I think the bird got its name first

That's nobody's business but the turk(ey)s.

Good point. We should start calling them Constantinople Chickens

But now it's Istanbul, not Constantinople.

And Pamela Geller needs to step in front of a speeding municipal bus.