Is this the same Tomb Raider movie where they wanted Kim Kardashian to play Lara Croft?

Angelina Jolie from the first movie is drop dead motherf*cking gorgeous. And, as such, they should go back in time and use that person as the lead in the new movie.

This just reeks of Catwoman.

I'm sold.

I found out recently that a kid I went to grammar school with was a programmer on the original Tomb Raider and now he is filthy rich.

I'm sorry, fool me once, shame on you. Fool me -- you can't get fooled again.

So is Angelina going full frontal, or what?

I liked both of the Tomb Raider movies. For different reasons. They were imperfect, but still likable.

The first one had decent action scenes, (although the CG affects look dated now.) but the plot was really weird to follow, and Lara always seemed to have the same cocky tone of voice throughout the movie. But I think that was more of a Director's failure.

The second one was a lot more dramatic character-wise, but it seemed to be a lot more of : Lara gets captured. She later escapes. Repeat. In other words, very lacking in action by comparison.

Tomb Raider always seemed like a franchise that targeted prudish teenage guys who were ashamed to look at porn.

Just download some porn, fap, and when you're done go play a real video game.

A hard 'R' then?

What they ought to do is make a video game out of it.

Lara Croft will be doubleteamed by two grizzly bears.

Mugato: MrEricSir: Tomb Raider always seemed like a franchise that targeted prudish teenage guys who were ashamed to look at porn

Yes, because a film with an attractive female in an action role HAS to be immediate whacking material and has no other value. That statement in no way says more about you than about whoever you're talking about.

No, it says a lot about marketing though. You know a well as I do that sex sells. Tomb Raider minus the boobs would have been a flop.

Arkanaut: So is Angelina going full frontal, or what?

DO NOT WANT. At least not current Angelina.

Tomb Raider era AJ was (imo) female perfection. Curves and toned....

MrEricSir: No, it says a lot about marketing though. You know a well as I do that sex sells. Tomb Raider minus the boobs would have been a flop.

No argument there. (new window)

BroVinny: I'm sorry, fool me once, shame on you. Fool me - *sunglasses* - you can't get fooled again.

And fixed.

/YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
//I know I'm not the only one who thought that.
///Tell me I wasn't. Please.

Mugato: MrEricSir: Tomb Raider always seemed like a franchise that targeted prudish teenage guys who were ashamed to look at porn

Yes, because a film with an attractive female in an action role HAS to be immediate whacking material and has no other value. That statement in no way says more about you than about whoever you're talking about.

You think you're being sarcastic...

IIRC, the original game's claim to fame happened when they were working on a lead character and the modeler accidentally made Lara's boobs comically huge. They all had a laugh (then presumably went home and jerked off), and left it like that.

Never played the game, but I thought both movies were entertaining.

jingks: Never played the game, but I thought both movies boobies were entertaining.

It had tits and (if not revealing, then) exaggerating, tight outfits.
IT had a tomb or two, that were raided in some fashion.
And it had horrendous camera angles and platforming segments.

Sounds like the movies were absolutely spot-on.

Since there hasn't been a good Tomb Raider movie yet, I'm not holding my breath.

If a woman is in ice cold water, she will have nipples.

The_Time_Master: If a woman is in ice cold water, she will have nipples.

... go on...

BroVinny: jingks: Never played the game, but I thought all 3 both movies boobies were entertaining.

apeiron242: DO NOT WANT. At least not current Angelina.


Taken 4 days ago.

Maybe this is more your thing:

The_Time_Master: If a woman is in ice cold water, she will have nipples.

Actually, wouldn't she have nipples anyway?

I think you want to throw the word "distended" or "erect" in there.

Theaetetus: Maybe this is more your thing:

MrEricSir: Mugato: MrEricSir: Tomb Raider always seemed like a franchise that targeted prudish teenage guys who were ashamed to look at porn

Yes, because a film with an attractive female in an action role HAS to be immediate whacking material and has no other value. That statement in no way says more about you than about whoever you're talking about.

No, it says a lot about marketing though. You know a well as I do that sex sells. Tomb Raider minus the boobs would have been a flop.

I pretty much hate 3d platformers due to how infuriating just their mechanics can make them(particularly in the early ones that came out around the same time as Tomb Raider), so I never played any of the TR games. However, from the reviews I read back then and from what folks said about the first few games seemed to be worth playing even without the absurd proportions Ms. Croft possessed, and sales certainly bore that out.

I get where you're coming from with the objectification angle, but saying that the series was "just" softcore porn, that no one had any other reason to buy them, and that Lara Croft was nothing but a digital sex doll is over-stating the issue, I think. Did lots of folks find her attractive and focus on that aspect of the game? Sure, but that doesn't seem to be the only reason anyone ever had anything to do with the franchise.

MrEricSir: Mugato: MrEricSir: Tomb Raider always seemed like a franchise that targeted prudish teenage guys who were ashamed to look at porn

Yes, because a film with an attractive female in an action role HAS to be immediate whacking material and has no other value. That statement in no way says more about you than about whoever you're talking about.

No, it says a lot about marketing though. You know a well as I do that sex sells. Tomb Raider minus the boobs would have been a flop.

I guess we will see if this is true with the newest one...They toned down her proportions to make her more realistic.

I remember playing the original Tomb Raider on my PC, with the NudeRaider patch installed. Simple happy times when all I had was a 9600 baud modem and our local ISP here in Ireland had only 2 telephone lines. It was about the only way I'd get to see pixelated boobs.