Humean_Nature: Petit_Merdeux: Might as well get this out of the way.

[www.documentingreality.com image 528x288]

I see you and raise you:

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Awww! I wanted to post that!

/We've had a doozy of a day.

Knot the way I wood choose to go.

So that's your headline, subby? And I guess you think it's funny making fun of tragedy. And for what? For a little greenlight. There's more to life than a greenlight, you know. Don'tcha know that? Well. I just don't understand it.

was he kinda funny-lookin'?

The wife said I should call it in, so I called it in.

end of story.

Rest In Pieces

So, I'm tendin' bar there at Ecklund and Swedlin's last Tuesday, and this little guy's drinkin' and he says, "So where can a guy find some action? I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake." And I says, "What kinda action?" and he says, "Woman action, what do I look like?" And I says, "Well, what do I look like, I don't arrange that kinda thing," and he says, "But I'm goin' crazy out there at the lake," and I says, "Well, this ain't that kinda place."

Am i doin it rite?

I guess that they pronounced him dead all over the scene.

*tree limb breaks*

Sock Ruh Tease: [i.imgur.com image 640x687]
Am i doin it rite?

The heck do ya mean?

why was there an ambulace there?
why was there a hursh there?

I was working for the town I lived in as a summer job. One of the girls I worked with was nearly (less than 2 inches from the blades) sucked into the chipper as she was loading it... all because the full timer whose entire job was to stand next to the emergency stop had walked away to talk to the home owner. The girl was too short to hit the emergency lever to stop it. After that they disallowed girls from using the chipper... you know that being the solution 1) Checking what height people needed to be to hit the emergency shut off or 2) firing the full timer that walked away.

Oh for Pete's sake, he's fleeing the interview! He's fleeing the interview!

He wasn't circumcised.

/Go Bears!

My uncle died this way several years ago, except that it was an industrial sawmill wood chipper (the kind that turns logs that are 3 feet in diameter into tiny shards). Sleeve got caught while he was doing maintenance. Went head-first. The emergency stop button was pressed by the time it got to his waist. At least it was quick.

/Not so CSB.

We call this the Sono Bono effect at our house.

Men in their 50's and 60's want to be able to do all the things they've done in their lives, as quickly and blithely as they did when they were younger. But their reflexes are increasingly off. A tree comes up and behaves in a slightly out-of-the-ordinary manner, a manner that would have been compensated for in one's youth. Or a sleeve on your jacket is slightly longer than you thought and you don't notice.

Or you could just say he died doing what he loved or whatever. Anyway, it's sad. Maybe it's not that bad of a way to die, though, compared to some other ways - but way too abrupt for the bystanders and family, I bet.

Quansem, that's a sad story, bro.

quansem: My uncle died this way several years ago, except that it was an industrial sawmill wood chipper (the kind that turns logs that are 3 feet in diameter into tiny shards). Sleeve got caught while he was doing maintenance. Went head-first. The emergency stop button was pressed by the time it got to his waist. At least it was quick.

/Not so CSB.

I think if it gets that far on me, i'd rather it just finish the job, better for everyone. what's worse? big mess and a pair of legs or just a big mess. also, if a sleeve catches i'd like to think I could slip out of my clothing, maybe t-shirts are the way to go, or break away sleeves.

I just had a great idea, clothing with break away sleeves for chipper operators!

Woodchipper death. This was one of the only deaths on that "1000 Ways to Die" show that you knew for sure was based on actual events (rather than on speculated "it could might possibly happen, our experts told us so" types of events.) I would posit that of all of the deaths that were featured on that show, woodchipper deaths happen the most often in real life.

//They're still not as gruesome as the "1000 Ways to Die" episode that featured the chick exploding from sudden decompression. I always figured that was based on the Byford Dolphin incident, but I could be wrong...

edmo: Goldensummer: what height people needed to be to hit the emergency shut off

Damn. We're talking ice water in the veins, Chuck Yaeger test pilot right stuff to have the presence of mind to hit that switch as the machine is half way up your arm.

I worked one summer drilling holes in cast iron in parts. I used to mentally practice pushing the red button in case any of my parts got caught or if any metal, sharp, high speed parts decided to suddenly exit the drill and enter my gooshy parts.

Also, that guy in the story above who walked away should be fired.

I'm not talking about your damn word, Jerry.

Say, Lou, didya hear the one about the guy who couldn't afford personalized plates, so he went and changed his name to J3L2404?

yeah, ACCiDENT. right

Atypical Person Reading Fark: Or you could just say he died doing what he loved

Screaming?

Waiting for the LiveLeak video.

Can't think of many more worse ways to buy it. Having Rosey O'Donnell sit on your face and suffocate you is one, but that might be it. Either way, your last image is a looming horrible death machine approaching your face, then blackness.

Well, now I know what I'm going to be watching tonight.

Anastacya: I guess that they pronounced him dead all over the scene.
A ball of pulp and bone in the corner of the chip truck actually.
Goldensummer: I was working...
Your story sounds weird, little people who can not operate a chipper or the reverse feed bar should be no where near one.
Anywhoo, 50 something and picking up sticks...who knows really...maybe he dived in, you really need to like that stuff to do it everyday.

"I'll fix ya smeggs, Margie"

If you want a gruesome death story ...

Father-in-law was an alcoholic who every night went to sleep in armchair in front of fire, then would wake up middle of night to finish off his half-g of beer.

But (what they think happened) one night woke up, got down on his knees to poke fire back to life, had a stroke and fell into fire.

Wife came down next morning, lounge full of smell of cooked meat ........ almost nothing left above neck ....

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Sock Ruh Tease: [i.imgur.com image 640x687]
Am i doin it rite?

The heck do ya mean?

Heck ya mean, heck ya mean!

You'll take care of it. You're a smooth smooth. Just clear 'em off the road.



He's peed three times already.

http://youtu.be/IBGCGEznYlo

/obligatory, never thought it would come in handy!

Of course, then I found this (new window) on liveleak.
I used to do this in elementary school.

/yes, it's work safe, believe it or not

colithian: Of course, then I found this (new window) on liveleak.
I used to do this in elementary school.

/yes, it's work safe, believe it or not

I remember seeing something like this done large scale on the shell of a VW Beetle. Pretty cool!

At a galvanizing plant, people have fallen into the galvanizing kettle (ie 800F molten Zinc).

I'm not sure how long it takes to die from this, but I'm pretty sure it isn't fast enough!

More industrial accidents: http://coronercasefile.pbworks.com/w/page/16512022/Industrial Accidents