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(Some Guy) Unlikely MIcrosoft patents asshole co-worker detection software   (geekwire.com) divider line 17
More: Unlikely, Microsoft, Toys for Tots, Western Canada, Dwight Schrute, sensory cues, patent applications, green technology, great halls  
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4275 clicks; posted to Geek » on 18 Nov 2011 at 10:04 AM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



17 Comments   (+0 »)
   
 
2011-11-18 10:12:53 AM
"getting workers to stop each other people off during meetings"

The whole thing? Accidentally?
 
2011-11-18 10:16:56 AM
MIcrosoft patents applies for a patent for asshole co-worker detection software

FTFY, Subby.
 
2011-11-18 10:18:00 AM
waterrockets: "getting workers to stop each other people off during meetings"

The whole thing? Accidentally?


Ted, I swear to God, if you come into my cubicle and stop me off one more time I'm going straight to HR.
 
2011-11-18 10:20:57 AM
When I was younger, I had a crush on a co worker who I wished would stop me other off during meetings. Probably would have gotten fired for it, though.
 
2011-11-18 10:21:17 AM
Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a new candidate for worst sentence published by a news organization in 2011.

FTFA: The filing describes a computer system that would monitor behavior in the workplace with the goal of getting workers to stop each other people off during meetings, and convincing bosses to stop bugging their direct reports on their lunch breaks, among many other bad workplace habits - but at no small cost to workplace privacy.

The fail . . . the fail . . .

/Journalism != copy & paste from press releases
 
2011-11-18 10:21:22 AM
503 Service Unavailable

No server is available to handle this request.


OK which one of you assholes broke the server?
 
2011-11-18 10:22:48 AM
link is busted, but there's this, with link to actual patent application.
 
2011-11-18 10:31:02 AM
They have the patent for zeros and ones.
 
2011-11-18 10:41:07 AM
with the goal of getting workers to stop each other people off during meetings, and convincing bosses to stop bugging their direct reports on their lunch breaks

What this is, I don't even....
 
2011-11-18 10:47:13 AM
with the goal of getting workers to stop each other people off during meetings, and convincing bosses to stop bugging their direct reports on their lunch breaks


s3.amazonaws.com
 
2011-11-18 10:53:29 AM
Theaetetus: FTFY, Subby.

It's a software patent for a large firm. "Applied for" essentially means "received" in the larger software world, the only difference being a small matter of time.
 
2011-11-18 11:02:22 AM
tomcatadam: Theaetetus: FTFY, Subby.

It's a software patent for a large firm. "Applied for" essentially means "received" in the larger software world, the only difference being a small matter of time.


Yes, but the claims will almost certainly be different by then.
 
2011-11-18 11:51:51 AM
If you have to use software to detect if you or someone you work with is an asshole....you are an asshole.

Anybody who has worked in an office for more than a day knows who all the assholes are.
 
2011-11-18 12:06:21 PM
home.earthlink.net
 
2011-11-18 12:18:37 PM
I'm stop each other people off during meetings, and convincing bosses to stop bugging their direct reports on their lunch breaks right now. So I'm kicking out a reply of really get these.
 
2011-11-18 04:35:51 PM
This sounds like a giant passive aggressive message from the inventor to his boss.
 
2011-11-21 01:23:13 AM
The headline is a lot funnier if you stop at the third word.
 
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