Well, Jesus does give sound advice.

Jesus and your dog are two of the most reliable personages!

.

What if my dog IS Jesus?

Yo! I'm happy for you, and I'm-a let you finish... But Beyonce had the greatest crazy stalker fan OF ALL TIME!!!!

Or maybe Taylor's a great big prankster? Didja think of that?

So the real question is, was a parrot named Clarence involved?

/Jesus is watching you

So there really is a Dog?

Pffft, just wait until Saturday, then we'll see who looks stupid!

/Is it weird that I think Taylor Swift kind of looks like an alien, yet I'd still hit it with zero hesitation at all?

I have never wanted to party with another human as much as I want to party with this guy! A couple shots of Jaegermeister and a few beers and me and this dude would bring the house down! I wonder if I can post bail for him across the country?

But they were right about the Eagles being a sucker bet this year!

OK, so....what's so weird about that?

Arkanaut: What if my dog IS Jesus?

eat his flesh

ultraholland: Arkanaut: What if my dog IS Jesus?

eat his flesh

drink his blood

HoboCop: Did the dog concur with jesus or vice versa?

either way there was corroboration... this sounds legit.

lurch_E_bean:
/Is it weird that I think Taylor Swift kind of looks like an alien, yet I'd still hit it with zero hesitation at all?

No. I'm with you on both points.

/fist, angry god and such

Sounds legit...

Don't say yes, run away now
I'll meet you when you're out
Of the church at the back door

Don't wait or say a single vow
You need to hear me out
And they said "speak now"

Look, Taylor. I'm really happy for you, and Imma let you finish. But David Burkowitz had the greatest....

probesport: [s2.hubimg.com image 260x323]

Oh Goddammitsomuch!

The house was vacant? Taylor Swift may marry him in the back yard. Sounds like a low-risk, high-reward play. I think I'd do it.

/doesn't work on Wall Street, yet.

Unlikely. With the exception of steak, my dog and Jesus never agree on anything.

Arkanaut: What if my dog IS Jesus?

Well to be fair, if the voices in my head told me I had a shot at Taylor Swift, I might pay give them at least a little room to make their argument:

Sounds like a typical Sat. night.

Did you ever realize that "God" spelled backwards is "dog"?

It makes you think.

That's not normal, but on Chantix it is.

So, years from now this guy dies and he meets god. And he says to god, God, I'm pissed at you. All I ever wanted was to marry and bang Taylor Swift. I prayed to you for weeks to give me Taylor Swift. And you give me nothing. God says, NOTHING, I gave you nothing? I sent you a dog to tell you that Taylor was waiting for you, and when you ignored the dog, I sent my son, and you ignored him. This ones on you fella.

BuckTurgidson: Did you ever realize that "God" spelled backwards is "dog"?

It makes you think.



Thinking is for the gloopy ones. The oomny ones use like inspiration and what Bog Dog sends.

LSD religion is a helluva drug.

Mr. Coffee Nerves: She should get lyrics for at least ten songs out of this

Damn, I was gonna go with "Well the break-up song she would write from this will go platinum"

my thunder- you stoles it

I'd find it easier to believe in a talking dog than in Jesus.

My dog and Jesus never agree on anything. It's worse than listening to my kids argue.

Wait. If your imaginary friend tells you to sacrifice your own child, that's credible. But, if "Jesus" tells you to go down and take a dump on the salad bar at Wendy's you're crazy.

Go figure.

Of course I'd think I'd be going nuts.

Jesus and the dog should be telling me to go fark the shiat out of her.

HAMMERTOE: Wait. If your imaginary friend tells you to sacrifice your own child, that's credible. But, if "Jesus" tells you to go down and take a dump on the salad bar at Wendy's you're crazy.

Go figure.

Well yeah, too many obstructions. If you're going to defecate in an area of a fast food chain, your best bet is the ketchup pumps.

HAMMERTOE: Wait. If your imaginary friend tells you to sacrifice your own child, that's credible. But, if "Jesus" tells you to go down and take a dump on the salad bar at Wendy's you're crazy.

Go figure.

Well yeah. Who the hell goes to Wendy's?

probesport: Well yeah, too many obstructions. If you're going to defecate in an area of a fast food chain, your best bet is the ketchup pumps.

Certainly, if you're going for ease of delivery. But for dramatic effect, (and artistic merit,), nothing beats a wretched soft-serve on a bed of lettuce.

HAMMERTOE: probesport: Well yeah, too many obstructions. If you're going to defecate in an area of a fast food chain, your best bet is the ketchup pumps.

Certainly, if you're going for ease of delivery. But for dramatic effect, (and artistic merit,), nothing beats a wretched soft-serve on a bed of lettuce.

Still have to get past the "sneeze guards". If you can hoist yourself up over top and straddle the chains holding up the glass you may be game for a carpet bombing.

I've never heard anybody call them "shiat-guards". All you gotta do is lean forward a bit at the waist...

HAMMERTOE: I've never heard anybody call them "shiat-guards". All you gotta do is lean forward a bit at the waist...

I admit, if he is hearing the voice of Jesus - he might be a bit nutzo.

But you would expect his Best Friend's advice to be credible.