FARK.com: (6715659) Beyonce Knowles craves ketchup. Alert the media

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		Beyonce Knowles craves ketchup. Alert the media (contactmusic.com)		51
		More: PSA, Beyonce, tomato sauces

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4146 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Nov 2011 at 5:22 PM | Favorite | share:

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51 Comments (+0 »)

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Grapple

2011-11-08 04:24:24 PM

She probably puts it on hot dogs too, that dirty biatch.

Xenomech

2011-11-08 05:31:21 PM

WupalooHavaii

2011-11-08 05:31:47 PM

I've seen some evidence that this whole pregnancy (baby bump) thing is fake and they hired a surrogate to have the baby. Anybody seen that footage of her belly just folding in half when she was sitting down for an interview? Not saying for sure, but in the case of celebrity pregnancies, I allow myself a tinfoil hat.

casual disregard

2011-11-08 05:34:22 PM

Ketchup (aka Catsup) (double aka barf) is the vilest most offensive most nastiest condiment which ever walked the planet.

Mustard is king. I'm pretty sure that Christ on the cross demanded mustard. Even boring yellow mustard is better than cynical ketchup. Spicy brown mustard? mmm-MMH.

Mustard is impervious, mustard is delicious, mustard is the word of G-d, mustard saved my life when that semi totally ran a red seconds after we had the green, mustard is not just a condiment but also a functional condom, mustard in your face, mustard in my mouth, mustard every place.

Murder ketchup. Mustard.

ArtosRC

2011-11-08 05:38:32 PM

Contact Music. Terrible headline. Hack submitter.

Pants full of macaroni!!

2011-11-08 05:42:00 PM

Who cares about Beyonce's pregnancy cravings. Farkers don't need any excuse for a

KETCHUP-BASHING THREAD!

/sriracha FTW

The My Little Pony Killer

2011-11-08 05:43:06 PM

Mustard is the devil's seed. The only use for mustard is slathered on baked chicken, because cooking gets rid of that vile tang.

/woman craves sugar
//quick, to the bomb shelter

DeRosso

2011-11-08 05:46:28 PM

casual disregard:
Mustard is king. I'm pretty sure that Christ on the cross demanded mustard.

Remember that red stuff running down Jesus at his crucifixion?

Yep, that was ketchup - and it was such a faux pas at the time that they had to pretend he was stabbed with a spear.

/But he farking hated relish

fred_chan

2011-11-08 05:50:47 PM

casual disregard: Mustard is king. I'm pretty sure that Christ on the cross demanded mustard.

To be fair, tomatoes weren't available in the middle east (or anywhere outside of the Americas) when Jesus was around, so he didn't know what he was missing--at least, not until he came to the Americas and became Mormon Jesus.

precia

2011-11-08 05:53:59 PM

I eat ketchup on omurice, and that is it. There are so many better sauces for every other purpose.

leevis

2011-11-08 05:56:33 PM

Anybody who's stuck up enough to complain about what someone puts on their hot dog has absolutely no business eating one in the first place.

casual disregard

2011-11-08 05:57:20 PM

DeRosso: casual disregard:
Mustard is king. I'm pretty sure that Christ on the cross demanded mustard.

Remember that red stuff running down Jesus at his crucifixion?

Yep, that was ketchup - and it was such a faux pas at the time that they had to pretend he was stabbed with a spear.

/But he farking hated relish

fred_chan: casual disregard: Mustard is king. I'm pretty sure that Christ on the cross demanded mustard.

To be fair, tomatoes weren't available in the middle east (or anywhere outside of the Americas) when Jesus was around, so he didn't know what he was missing--at least, not until he came to the Americas and became Mormon Jesus.

Get the fark out of here.

Tomatoes have their place. I admit I would hesitate to eat a mustard pizza.

But burgers, frankfurters, sausages, tuna, etc.? farken spicy-ass brown-ass mustard. The dankier the better. You can take your communist ketchup and you can go to heck.

db2

2011-11-08 06:00:22 PM

My god. We really are too dumb for Beavis and Butthead.

video man

2011-11-08 06:06:41 PM

Ketchup sucks.

/Puts buffalo sauce on my fries.

blackmtnmantheonly

2011-11-08 06:09:48 PM

Who is this Bouncy Knowles of which subbie speaks?

Rohasman

2011-11-08 06:10:44 PM

The citizens of the great port city of Mahon bemoan her choice. "Why?" you ask... that's an egg-cellent question.

xnmw

2011-11-08 06:17:25 PM

College radio? Weapons and Helmets Magazine? Girl Beat?

DeRosso

2011-11-08 06:21:59 PM

casual disregard:
Tomatoes have their place. I admit I would hesitate to eat a mustard pizza.

But burgers, frankfurters, sausages, tuna, etc.? farken spicy-ass brown-ass mustard. The dankier the better. You can take your communist ketchup and you can go to heck.

Go on, now - give it a good smack in the bottom, and lets the slow, sensual drip garnish your meal.

img821.imageshack.us

And you know, that this is the truth:

img683.imageshack.us

casual disregard

2011-11-08 06:26:35 PM

DeRosso: casual disregard:
Tomatoes have their place. I admit I would hesitate to eat a mustard pizza.

But burgers, frankfurters, sausages, tuna, etc.? farken spicy-ass brown-ass mustard. The dankier the better. You can take your communist ketchup and you can go to heck.

Go on, now - give it a good smack in the bottom, and lets the slow, sensual drip garnish your meal.

[img821.imageshack.us image 360x540]

And you know, that this is the truth:

[img683.imageshack.us image 183x275]

We are now enemies.

When the day of reckoning dawns, I will squirt divine mustard down your throat.

MitchellX

2011-11-08 06:32:00 PM

Ketchup has natural mellowing agents.

"These are the good times with occupiers and Cain."
Life is flowing like ketchup on your brain.Ketchup!Ketchup!!"

From The Ketchup Advisory Board.

mjoven1975

2011-11-08 06:33:30 PM

Ketchup belongs nowhere near a hot dog. I prefer onion, mustard, and mayo with a bit of shredded cheese. Ketchup is disgusting.

farvour

2011-11-08 06:34:05 PM

Who gives a fark?

Cyno01

2011-11-08 06:41:16 PM

Pants full of macaroni!!: Who cares about Beyonce's pregnancy cravings. Farkers don't need any excuse for a

KETCHUP-BASHING THREAD!

/sriracha FTW

Once you get past the heat, and past the garlic, sriracha is rather bitter.

/sriracha mixed with ketchup ftw

puddleonfire

2011-11-08 06:53:44 PM

It's gonna be a boy.

Mofo_Jones

2011-11-08 07:03:33 PM

I like ketchup. So does my daughter. Mustard sucks. That is all.

casual disregard

2011-11-08 07:16:24 PM

Mofo_Jones: I like ketchup. So does my daughter. Mustard sucks. That is all.

Go directly to hell. Do not pass taste. Do not collect flavor.

c-roc

2011-11-08 07:19:51 PM

hey, let's get back to the fake pregnancy thing, I saw the amazing collapsible stomach too. Where's the beef?!?

Roxy Monoxide

2011-11-08 07:20:02 PM

Sriracha is ketchup's hot(ter) cousin. That once you've encountered, you wonder why/how you never'd run into before.

Not sure what Beyond Knowledge has to do with it but, whatevs.

Jambalaya James

2011-11-08 07:20:16 PM

Cyno01: Pants full of macaroni!!: Who cares about Beyonce's pregnancy cravings. Farkers don't need any excuse for a

KETCHUP-BASHING THREAD!

/sriracha FTW

Once you get past the heat, and past the garlic, sriracha is rather bitter.

/sriracha mixed with ketchup ftw

Siriracha mixed with vinegar ftw. A teriyaki place near my work serves chicken with said sauce, and its awesome.

casual disregard

2011-11-08 07:24:03 PM

Roxy Monoxide: Sriracha is ketchup's hot(ter) cousin. That once you've encountered, you wonder why/how you never'd run into before.

I don't know no sriracha, but if it's a matter of bland vs. spicy, I automatically know what the difference is.

Americans have a pussy-palatte. So weak, amazingly weak. Cambodian soldiers twisted a wire hanger into a cylindrical shape and then shoved it into cold coffee-water. Almost-instant hot coffee. Americans eat an apple and complain about how it's too spicy.

ProfessorOhki

2011-11-08 07:37:46 PM

Sriracha - Good tier
Sambal Oelek - untouchable tier

You can't squirt it, but it's the superior Huy Fong Foods product. My tongue is tingling just thinking about it. Well, that or my coffee is too hot.

Roxy Monoxide

2011-11-08 07:38:51 PM

casual disregard: Roxy Monoxide: Sriracha is ketchup's hot(ter) cousin. That once you've encountered, you wonder why/how you never'd run into before.

I don't know no sriracha,

You are missin' out. Seriously. If you don't want to buy a bottle at an Int'l Market, test it out at a Pho restaurant._{(Not sure of your location)}

Sriracha (NW)

Gunny Walker

2011-11-08 07:50:24 PM

Roxy Monoxide: casual disregard: Roxy Monoxide: Sriracha is ketchup's hot(ter) cousin. That once you've encountered, you wonder why/how you never'd run into before.

I don't know no sriracha,

You are missin' out. Seriously. If you don't want to buy a bottle at an Int'l Market, test it out at a Pho restaurant. (Not sure of your location)

Sriracha (NW)

Hell, I buy sriracha at Wal-Mart. You don't need an international market.

QT_3.14159

2011-11-08 07:56:59 PM

I also craved ketchup when pregnant. I prefer mustard for most things, but french fries need ketchup. My favorite is slightly overcooked McDonald's french fries salted and peppered with a cup of ketchup and a packet of McD's hot mustard for dipping alternately as flavors intermingle.

/mayonnaise is nasty

Cyno01

2011-11-08 08:01:25 PM

Gunny Walker: Roxy Monoxide: casual disregard: Roxy Monoxide: Sriracha is ketchup's hot(ter) cousin. That once you've encountered, you wonder why/how you never'd run into before.

I don't know no sriracha,

You are missin' out. Seriously. If you don't want to buy a bottle at an Int'l Market, test it out at a Pho restaurant. (Not sure of your location)

Sriracha (NW)

Hell, I buy sriracha at Wal-Mart. You don't need an international market.

Yeah, you can get it any any grocery store, sometimes its by the hot sauce, sometimes its in the asian section of the ethnic food aisle, if you cant find it, just ask (loudly) for "cock sauce". Theyll know what youre talking about.

/oblig
//and new Bobcats just because

mralphabet

2011-11-08 08:19:36 PM

Mofo_Jones: I like ketchup. So does my daughter. Mustard sucks. That is all.

I concur. Mustard is groty.

Mofo_Jones

2011-11-08 08:20:16 PM

casual disregard: Mofo_Jones: I like ketchup. So does my daughter. Mustard sucks. That is all.

Go directly to hell. Do not pass taste. Do not collect flavor.

Well, if it helps me escape the flames, I will use brown mustard in recipes, but mustard is just not something I want to add to a burger. Especially not if it's electric-yellow #5-colored French's.

Nobody's mentioned hoisin sauce yet...

QT_3.14159: ./mayonnaise is nasty

a-farkin' men.

vudukungfu

2011-11-08 08:28:30 PM

DeRosso: Remember that red stuff running down Jesus at his crucifixion?

Can we put our TV antenna up there?
That's our sacred mountain.
But that's our sacred TV antenna. Remember? The Holy Trinitron? When they killed him and all the colors came running out? The reds, the greens, the blues?

/apologies to the Firesign Theater, you know who you are.

Mr.Poops

2011-11-08 08:31:10 PM

Ketchup is farking awesome, in fact -- I bathe in it even when skunks don't spray me. What makes a man a man, with a grilled cheese in a frying pan? Ketchup. What do I put on french fries, when mayonaise or nacho cheese I just despise? Ketchup. I put it on my hash and eggs, deep fried turkey legs, when many other condiments lay and beg? Ketchup. Ketchup puts hair on my chest, gives me the strength of 7 Morgan Freemans and is better than mustard I surely jest. Ketchup.

FingHostile

2011-11-08 08:39:33 PM

Was at Keens Steakhouse in NY this past friday night. My fiancee and I watched in disgust as the Russian dude at the next table poured ketchup all over his lamb chops. I'm still not sure why the waiter even gave him the bottle.

LegacyDL

2011-11-08 08:44:52 PM

FingHostile: Was at Keens Steakhouse in NY this past friday night. My fiancee and I watched in disgust as the Russian dude at the next table poured ketchup all over his lamb chops. I'm still not sure why the waiter even gave him the bottle.

Even though Keens is slowly edging out Peter Luger, you should have gone to Peter Luger's instead. I have yet to see anything tragic like that during any of my visits and you can order a porterhouse for two just for yourself.

Oh man I need some steak fast....

video man

2011-11-08 08:51:49 PM

Wait, what? The filter eats "Soviet Russia"?

FingHostile

2011-11-08 09:00:06 PM

LegacyDL: FingHostile: Was at Keens Steakhouse in NY this past friday night. My fiancee and I watched in disgust as the Russian dude at the next table poured ketchup all over his lamb chops. I'm still not sure why the waiter even gave him the bottle.

Even though Keens is slowly edging out Peter Luger, you should have gone to Peter Luger's instead. I have yet to see anything tragic like that during any of my visits and you can order a porterhouse for two just for yourself.

Oh man I need some steak fast....

Yeah, I've heard Peter Luger is awesome. But our friend in NY is wine expert and pulled some strings to get us into Keens on a Friday night.
She also took us to St. Anselm in Brooklyn on Saturday night. I had the sweet tea chicken. It was absolutely the best chicken I've ever had. I even sucked out the brains at the urging of her friend Leif. It was a great decision.

KrispyKritter

2011-11-08 09:43:49 PM

casual disregard: Ketchup (aka Catsup) (double aka barf) is the vilest most offensive most nastiest condiment which ever walked the planet.

Mustard is king. I'm pretty sure that Christ on the cross demanded mustard. Even boring yellow mustard is better than cynical ketchup. Spicy brown mustard? mmm-MMH.

Mustard is impervious, mustard is delicious, mustard is the word of G-d, mustard saved my life when that semi totally ran a red seconds after we had the green, mustard is not just a condiment but also a functional condom, mustard in your face, mustard in my mouth, mustard every place.

Murder ketchup. Mustard.

fact and opinion: you seem to not know the difference, you $5.00 a month whore.

Jument

2011-11-08 09:52:59 PM

Get a box.
Cut a hole in the box.
Fill the box with ketchup.
Put your dick in the box.
Get her to open the box.

Ta da!

ObscureNameHere

2011-11-08 10:10:14 PM

Pics of Miss Bouncy Knolls would be appreciated.

tnkwarrior

2011-11-09 12:30:18 AM

...not related (I hope) but I just read somewhere that Jay-Z is hung like a Pepsi bottle.

Gelatinous

2011-11-09 05:08:50 AM

She's still a lesbian.

Olympus Mons

2011-11-09 06:37:11 AM

I love ketchup. Mustard is very good too, on the right thing. I'd take Beyonce nude with ketchup or mustard.. Very lickable...I mean likeable. Well of course before she was pregnant and married off. That's one very pretty woman.

BTW hummus is good on some sandwiches.

Damn I'm hungry now... thanks a lot

I Mash Grains

2011-11-09 07:13:59 AM

Approves (obscure for non-San Diegoans)

www.neighborhoodsd.com