Sybarite: Depends on the Mormon.

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Those don't look like regulation garments. I'm going to have to ask her to take them off this instant.

SphericalTime: Wow. That article is defamatory and hilarious at the same time.

You should unbunch your magic underwear.

Try dating one in a family of converts that oh by the way don't really practice what they preach. You'll learn to at least be extremely wary of them after that. I did go to high school with possibly the only one in the area that was extremely nice, laid back, and behaved himself. Don't know what he went on to after graduation though so he could be living in Vegas running the floor shows for all I know...

Ask yourself these questions. Answering yes may make you a moron.

I have poured orange juice over my cereal.

I have pushed doors marked pull.

I have locked myself out of my car.

I have brushed my teeth with skin lotion or rubbed toothpaste into my skin.

I have left my car headlights on and killed my battery.

I have overslept because I set my alarm for PM.

I have pulled doors marked push.

I have said some unbelievably inappropriate things at incredibly inappropriate moments.

I have gotten myself caught in my fly (men), or I have tucked my skirt into my pantyhose after leaving the bathroom (women).

I have walked smack into patio doors or picture windows.

I have done a lot of things I'm glad aren't included on this quiz.

Oh you said M-o-r-M-o-n.

I like it when Mormon missionaries ring my doorbell.

I tell them I'm a Druid, and I've been washed in the blood of a tree. Then I start preaching at them.

Funny, they seem to get in a hurry to leave.

The question should be who do I hate more, Mormons or Scientologists

Mormon hate or no, I don't think either of the GOP candidates is too dangerously mormon. The reasons for this are different for each candidate, though.

Romney has shown that he's an opportunist above all else (abandoning the mormon stance on, say, abortion when it was politically expedient and then picking it up again when he realized that he had to court the religious right on the national level).

Huntsman, when he was the governor of Utah, managed to tell the mormon hierarchy to fark off several times when he thought it was in the best interest of the state. He worked well with them on other occasions (again, when he thought it was the right thing to do).

I'm not saying that their religion is absolutely irrelevant. I'm saying that both guys value pragmatism in their own ways. My opinion is that Romney has his finger in the wind and is willing to do whatever it takes to get elected--religion be damned. Huntsman will do what he thinks is the right thing--religion be damned. YMMV.

Have you ever under the influence of alcohol questioned the teachings of the Mormon church?

Cythraul: I'm gay. So disliking Mormons comes with the pink package.

I thought being gay meant you avoided the pink package.

I don't hate Mormons, I just don't want them bashing on my door at 8:00 Saturday morning

/too lazy to find the link

It's very convenient how Mr. Smith never let any one else see those Golden Plates and then they magically disappeared when he was done. Never understood how any one could get past that party of the religion and still believe.

Cythraul: The Mormon church was one of the major backers to the organization of the Prop 8 campaign. The head of their church even alluded that their happiness in their afterlife would be threatened if the members of the church didn't pony up money to help the campaign. They paid for, and organized all kinds of stuff for Prop 8, but one of my favorites were the misleading advertisements that said "Will Prop 8 deny rights to gay people? No, of course it won't."

Word.

Satire. You're doing it right.

numbone: Ask yourself these questions. Answering yes may make you a moron.

I have poured orange juice over my cereal.

I have pushed doors marked pull.

I have locked myself out of my car.

I have brushed my teeth with skin lotion or rubbed toothpaste into my skin.

I have left my car headlights on and killed my battery.

I have overslept because I set my alarm for PM.

I have pulled doors marked push.

I have said some unbelievably inappropriate things at incredibly inappropriate moments.

I have gotten myself caught in my fly (men), or I have tucked my skirt into my pantyhose after leaving the bathroom (women).

I have walked smack into patio doors or picture windows.

I have done a lot of things I'm glad aren't included on this quiz.

Oh you said M-o-r-M-o-n.

9 of 11 for me. No on O.J and Toothpaste.

blackmtnmantheonly: I like it when Mormon missionaries ring my doorbell.

The last time I ran into some Mormon missionaries, they were the only white people on a public bus in a mixed Hispanic / Asian / Muslim neighborhood. Gotta admire their guts though.

If you can't go see it, at least listen to the soundtrack.

Smith was a magician from Palmyra, New York in the 1820s. He was also the first American to possess superpowers, claiming he could find precious minerals and buried treasure by staring at rocks. Farmers paid him $3 a day to locate riches beneath their fields.

Alas, the buried gem market in Upstate New York wasn't what it was thought to be, otherwise Smith would have found it. So he decided to start an exciting new career as a prophet.

What an 18th century huckster might look like:


What a 21st century huckster might look like:

offmymeds: Smith was a magician from Palmyra, New York in the 1820s. He was also the first American to possess superpowers, claiming he could find precious minerals and buried treasure by staring at rocks. Farmers paid him $3 a day to locate riches beneath their fields.

Alas, the buried gem market in Upstate New York wasn't what it was thought to be, otherwise Smith would have found it. So he decided to start an exciting new career as a prophet.

What an 18th century huckster might look like:
[vvoice.vo.llnwd.net image 250x333]

What a 21st century huckster might look like:
[vvoice.vo.llnwd.net image 250x363]

Oops...19th century huckster.

Dr._Michael_Hfuhruhurr: Cythraul: I'm gay. So disliking Mormons comes with the pink package.

I thought being gay meant you avoided the pink package.

Close the thread. We're done here.

So here's my thoughts.
Big deal how the church was founded. Honestly. It's what people do NOW that matters. If all that matters is how it was founded years before you were even born, you worry about too much crap.
If you're frightened of people who don't drink or cuss, you've got issues.
Also, I don't give a rats butt what YOU believe in. To each his own.
And no. I ain't votin' for Romney.

Cythraul: The Mormon church was one of the major backers to the organization of the Prop 8 campaign. The head of their church even alluded that their happiness in their afterlife would be threatened if the members of the church didn't pony up money to help the campaign. They paid for, and organized all kinds of stuff for Prop 8,

No, it was not a MAJOR backer, that was the media telling you that. It caused a lot of problems in the church. Some churches even broke away. There were actually fist fights in a couple.
I myself changed Wards because of the bigotry (and Fox news watching monkeys) was too much for me to stand.
The afterlife threatened? Stop watching South Park for your ideas. That never happened. We're free to vote for whatever we want.


Also, JFK liked us. And you hate JFK, you hate America. Why do you hate America?
Link (new window)

/link is as hot as the Magic Underwear

Bigotry: Racism of the 21st century.

Blacks and Asians are now good, Mormons and Muslims are not...

madpianist: Bigotry: Racism of the 21st century.

Blacks and Asians are now good, Mormons and Muslims are not...

You don't have a choice as to the colour of your skin.

You do have a choice as to which stupid bullshiat you interpose between yourself and reality.

madpianist: Bigotry: Racism of the 21st century.

Blacks and Asians are now good, Mormons and Muslims are not...

Bet we can guess which group you fall into.

BurnShrike: madpianist: Bigotry: Racism of the 21st century.

Blacks and Asians are now good, Mormons and Muslims are not...

You don't have a choice as to the colour of your skin.

You do have a choice as to which stupid bullshiat you interpose between yourself and reality.

"At a minimum, then, the Supreme Court is willing to treat a trait as effectively immutable if changing it would involve great difficulty, such as requiring a major physical change or a traumatic change of identity. Reading the case law in a more capacious manner, "immutability" may describe those traits that are so central to a person's identity that it would be abhorrent for government to penalize a person for refusing to change them, regardless of how easy that change might be physically." - Watkins v. U.S. Army

How about this - can you, as an atheist, choose to believe in God? Like, turn it on for the next hour, and fundamentally believe it to be true? Religion is effectively immutable.

But that said, it's not bigotry to point out that the Mormon Church is a political organization that spends millions of dollars to oppress the rights of minorities, or that one of their founders practiced polygamy while simultaneously claiming it was illegal, so that he could get out of paying support to one of his ex-wives and her children.

Most people that bash Utah have never been here.
That's okay. Please stay away.
Stay off of our snow. Just because our international airport is minutes from the best skiing in the nation, DO NOT come for the weekend.
Please don't discover and trod upon our countless backcountry trails or BLM land where you can camp where ever you want.
Our award winning, high alcohol micro-brews are OUR secret. Not for you!
DO NOT fish on the Green River below Flaming Gorge dam or run a multi-day river trip with a self issued free permit. Not for you!

Thanks.

BTW, if you believe more than HALF the nonsense the writer is saying, congrats.
You've been trolled.
I'm' not offended easily. In fact the article didn't offend me but the writer knows about Mormons like he had his 7 year old gaze at Wikipedia for all of 30 seconds.

Bad Subby = Bad article.

I've read some stupid articles here on Fark, and this is one of them.

Mormons hate beer, therefore you should hate Mormons.

I'm always impressed by the number of Mormons on Fark in these threads. It doesn't fit with the myth of well-scrubbed black-tie and short-sleeved shirt missionaries spreading messages with the best of intentions, but certainly represents the reality of angry basement-dwelling neckbeards bitterly waiting for the reinstatement of polygamy so that they can marry three or four teenage girls.

Grew up Catholic in Utah, now I live in Florida. I feel like a religious refugee.

Zombie DJ: No, it was not a MAJOR backer,

Yeah, it was. I appreciate that not everyone in the church thought that was right but they did publish the list of people who donated and what their religious connections were. I did bother to go through it before I became upset.

Also, I would be grateful if you all stopped the I'm coming out as a Mormon campaign because after all of that it is really adding insult to injury. Annnd maybe watch the little recruiter children going to bad neighborhoods because then I want to go talk to them to make sure they don't get hurt and I feel gross about it. Thanks!

offmymeds: Smith was a magician from Palmyra, New York in the 1820s. He was also the first American to possess superpowers, claiming he could find precious minerals and buried treasure by staring at rocks. Farmers paid him $3 a day to locate riches beneath their fields.

Alas, the buried gem market in Upstate New York wasn't what it was thought to be, otherwise Smith would have found it. So he decided to start an exciting new career as a prophet.

What an 18th century huckster might look like:


What a 21st century huckster might look like:

Both pics are just begging for a caption

I'd really like to see some more stuff they've written on American history-this was brilliant.

What is it about superstitious people that they need me to join in with their superstitions?

Why does it make them insecure when I decline the invitation?

Why should I care about how they feel, when they don't give a gnats cock about how I feel?