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(Buzzfeed)   Ladies and gentlemen of Fark, I present the Ketchup Fountain   (buzzfeed.com) divider line 82
    More: Weird, Ketchup Fountain, Fark, Charlie Day, keyboard cat, W.T.F.?  
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7981 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Nov 2011 at 1:36 PM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2011-11-03 02:20:02 PM  
they need one of those at red lobster, i would just put my whole plate under it.
one on every table
 
2011-11-03 02:28:49 PM  
i....love...lovelovelovelovelove ketchup. buuuuuuuuuut...imagining it gooping out of a fountain....all viscous and...angry.........makes me feel sick and sad inside........
 
2011-11-03 02:32:21 PM  

smouffle: i....love...lovelovelovelovelove ketchup. buuuuuuuuuut...imagining it gooping out of a fountain....all viscous and...angry.........makes me feel sick and sad inside........


Ladies and gentlemen of Fark I present to you Farks resident 8 year old little girl...

I kid but if you love catsup you may want to go see a doctor because something is wrong with you. Devils condiment!
 
2011-11-03 02:38:46 PM  
You can almost feel the mellowing agents working.
 
2011-11-03 02:40:24 PM  
Am I the only person to read the headline as "Ketchup Foundation"?

www.nndb.com

Thought she was a Mustard person.
 
2011-11-03 02:43:40 PM  

kbotc: Sapper_Topo: Disgusting condiment is disgusting. On that note I should be able to brutally beat my youngest daughters former babysitter for teaching her to put catsup on everything. Eggs, sausage, and for all that is holy she got her to put it on hot dogs. Yep a real old fashioned flogging was warranted. But she was a cougar with lovely natural boobs so I just let it go.

/Had to ask her husband if they were fake
//They were real
///Goadamnit I hate catsup

Is Franks Red Hot any better? I hear people put that s*$% on everything.


The preferred condiment on fark.com is sriracha sauce.

/goes to file a patent for the sriracha fountain
 
2011-11-03 02:45:02 PM  

ChrisDe: Golden Corral buffets are advertising a chocolate fountain. You couldn't pay me to try that, I can only imagine how many fingers are in that throughout the day. Not that I'd eat at Golden Corral anyway.


Any worse than the collections of germs and God-knows-what, that you can find at your average McDonald's?
 
2011-11-03 02:53:14 PM  
And of course they ruin it with nasty-ass McDonald's fries...
 
2011-11-03 02:57:59 PM  

Trance750: Any worse than the collections of germs and God-knows-what, that you can find at your average McDonald's?


Ladies?
 
2011-11-03 03:21:45 PM  
These are not new. Mrs. Moose and I do this at the house. We go to the living room, put down some tarps, fire up the love machine...

Oh, wait. It's a ketchup fountain? I thought that was... Nevermind.
 
2011-11-03 03:26:36 PM  

McManus_brothers: BurnShrike: AverageAmericanGuy: UtileDysfunktion: Wake me when there's a beer volcano.

Can I interest you in a pamphlet?

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 500x375]

Yeah, I did a GIS for "beer volcano" too and came up with lots of FSM references. What's the deal?

In the FSM belief system, Heaven is full of beer volcanos and stripper factories.


In the FSM belief system Hell also has beer volcanoes and stripper factories. Of course it's light beer and the strippers all have STD's...
 
2011-11-03 03:44:36 PM  
I am simultaneously grossed out and intrigued; after all, French Fries exist to be a vector for ketchup, in my opinion.
 
2011-11-03 03:55:49 PM  

Sapper_Topo: Disgusting condiment is disgusting. On that note I should be able to brutally beat my youngest daughters former babysitter for teaching her to put catsup on everything. Eggs, sausage, and for all that is holy she got her to put it on hot dogs. Yep a real old fashioned flogging was warranted. But she was a cougar with lovely natural boobs so I just let it go.

/Had to ask her husband if they were fake
//They were real
///Goadamnit I hate catsup


You'd be burned at the stake in Pittsburgh. Not for disliking the pride and joy of the city, but for calling it catsup.
 
2011-11-03 04:25:54 PM  

Sapper_Topo: Disgusting condiment is disgusting. On that note I should be able to brutally beat my youngest daughters former babysitter for teaching her to put catsup on everything. Eggs, sausage, and for all that is holy she got her to put it on hot dogs. Yep a real old fashioned flogging was warranted. But she was a cougar with lovely natural boobs so I just let it go.

/Had to ask her husband if they were fake
//They were real
///Goadamnit I hate catsup


Who pissed put ketchup in your cheerios this morning?
 
2011-11-03 04:41:28 PM  
I like ketchup on my well-done steaks.
 
2011-11-03 04:44:16 PM  
Behold, the World's Largest Catsup Bottle! (new window)
www.catsupbottle.com
 
2011-11-03 04:54:07 PM  

TF2_Pyro: I like ketchup on my well-done steaks.


How long does it take you to go through a bottle of cock sauce?
 
2011-11-03 05:13:06 PM  

Bruxellensis: EViLTeW: Bruxellensis: beerviewmirror: Siberwulf: Show me a fountain with Ranch and I'll be impressed.

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 600x450]

I came
So did the fountain, it appears.

What (who) do you think is under the table?

Ron Jeremy.
 
2011-11-03 05:23:47 PM  
Put that thing away you're going to get us all killed!
 
2011-11-03 05:33:01 PM  
that thing is no worse than the ketchup bottles on the tables in resturants, they may say hienze on the bottle but usally some private brand out of a big box gets put back in the bottles and yes the ketchup at the bottom is who knows how old
 
2011-11-03 05:36:26 PM  
The horror...
 
2011-11-03 05:57:02 PM  

MoronLessOff: Behold, the World's Largest Catsup Bottle! (new window)
[www.catsupbottle.com image 340x504]


Oh Collinsville, how much you fail at everything you want to be good at.
 
2011-11-03 06:36:48 PM  
I'm not sure if this is awesome, or if I threw up in my mouth a bit.
 
2011-11-03 06:45:32 PM  

haywatchthis: that thing is no worse than the ketchup bottles on the tables in resturants, they may say hienze on the bottle but usally some private brand out of a big box gets put back in the bottles and yes the ketchup at the bottom is who knows how old


Eh, it's got enough vinegar in it that I am not worried as long as it's a fairly busy restaurant. Vinegar kills a lot of bacteria :) - I've had ketchup in my fridge for upwards of 2 years before. Never seen it go bad...
 
2011-11-03 07:14:46 PM  
I think the reason so many people biatch about ketchup is just because they couldn't possibly invent a condiment that covers as many bases as it does (sweet, salty, sour...bitter?).

You know what a shiatty condiment is? Dijon mustard. It's aggressively nasty.
 
2011-11-03 07:42:47 PM  
That's not right.
 
2011-11-03 10:22:01 PM  

ladyfortuna: I've had ketchup in my fridge for upwards of 2 years before. Never seen it go bad...


Bad is where ketchup starts.
 
2011-11-03 11:20:42 PM  
I'm the type to put ketchup on my ketchup, and I still think this is disgusting.
 
2011-11-04 01:45:23 AM  

beantowndog: ladyfortuna: I've had ketchup in my fridge for upwards of 2 years before. Never seen it go bad...

Bad is where ketchup starts.


Traitor.
 
2011-11-04 02:20:24 AM  
No mention of Portland, Oregon's chocolate fountain at The Candy Basket in Gresham?
farm4.static.flickr.com
 
2011-11-04 10:40:31 AM  

Sapper_Topo: smouffle: i....love...lovelovelovelovelove ketchup. buuuuuuuuuut...imagining it gooping out of a fountain....all viscous and...angry.........makes me feel sick and sad inside........

Ladies and gentlemen of Fark I present to you Farks resident 8 year old little girl...

I kid but if you love catsup you may want to go see a doctor because something is wrong with you. Devils condiment!


so what if i'm 8? i put ketchup on my chicken pot pie yesterday. i'm not ashamed.
 
2011-11-04 12:29:40 PM  

kbotc: MoronLessOff: Behold, the World's Largest Catsup Bottle! (new window)
[www.catsupbottle.com image 340x504]

Oh Collinsville, how much you fail at everything you want to be good at.


Even horseradish?
 
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