If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Starpulse)   Judge orders Lindsay Lohan to finish her Playboy photo shoot before reporting to jail to begin her 30 day sentence   (starpulse.com) divider line 66
    More: Followup, Lindsay Lohan, Playboy, Jayde Nicole, Playboy Playmate, breach of contracts, fools  
•       •       •

4898 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 03 Nov 2011 at 11:16 AM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



66 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2011-11-03 10:24:06 AM  
Why does the judge hate the American public so much?
 
2011-11-03 11:20:22 AM  
"If you're getting a million dollars, I wanna see s**t I've never seen before,"


I wanna see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with bull-mastiff jizz.

Stand in line, honey.
 
2011-11-03 11:20:22 AM  
30 day jail sentence > tebow
 
2011-11-03 11:22:13 AM  

Freakin Rican: 30 day jail sentence > tebow


ESPN see's what you did there.
 
2011-11-03 11:24:33 AM  

fatalvenom: I wanna see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with bull-mastiff jizz.


I'd watch that. I wouldn't pay to see it, but I'd watch it.
 
2011-11-03 11:24:35 AM  

fatalvenom: "If you're getting a million dollars, I wanna see s**t I've never seen before,"


I wanna see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with bull-mastiff jizz.

Stand in line, honey.


I wanna see a bull-mastiff filled with Ms. Lohan jizz.

Line forms behind me, sir.
 
2011-11-03 11:25:23 AM  
Huh, I would love to see if that excuse would work for the normal people of the USA.

"You're sentenced to 30 days in jail for violating probation."
"But your honor, I have a nude photoshoot this week! Can I wait until next week?"
"60 day jail sentence begins NOW."
 
2011-11-03 11:26:40 AM  
Not only has she gone from second round pick to toxic free agent in my Celebrity pool, we've actually started an incrementally increasing life-pool on her.

//bet $80 to win $250 on 14 months, EIP
 
2011-11-03 11:26:57 AM  
30 day jail sentence in Cali for women guilty of non-violent crimes ends up being 2 or 3 days. By Monday we'll have another thread of the likes "The rich never serve the same time the regular people do".
 
2011-11-03 11:28:45 AM  
This photoshoot will go into the record book as the longest lasting photoshoot in the world... lasting 40 years!
 
2011-11-03 11:29:00 AM  

ddam: 30 day jail sentence in Cali for women guilty of non-violent crimes ends up being 2 or 3 days. By Monday we'll have another thread of the likes "The rich never serve the same time the regular people do".


Wel,, you have to admit it's frustrating the the justice you receive can depend on the justice you can afford.
 
2011-11-03 11:30:22 AM  

ddam: 30 day jail sentence in Cali for women guilty of non-violent crimes ends up being 2 or 3 days. By Monday we'll have another thread of the likes "The rich never serve the same time the regular people do".


What's the standard poor people punishment for reckless driving while drunk and on cocaine again?
 
2011-11-03 11:31:23 AM  

ddam: 30 day jail sentence in Cali for women guilty of non-violent crimes ends up being 2 or 3 days. By Monday we'll have another thread of the likes "The rich never serve the same time the regular people do".


By people who say they don't really pay attention to her.

Really.
 
2011-11-03 11:33:02 AM  
I want to see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with a midget.

The whole midget, then have her shoot it out, and be forced to lick it clean. All the vaginal juices, blood, and whatever other effluents may have become stuck to the midget. Then I want her to be forced to remove one pound of her own flesh, cook it, and eat it. What part of her body the flesh comes from is unimportant, but it needs to be one pound, no more, no less. Then I'd like to see her sodomized by a dildo with rubber spikes, attached to a power drill.

Perhaps after that she could be paraded, nude and bloody, through the streets of Los Angeles. Her walk of shame, all the way to jail.
 
2011-11-03 11:34:10 AM  

TheManofPA: ddam: 30 day jail sentence in Cali for women guilty of non-violent crimes ends up being 2 or 3 days. By Monday we'll have another thread of the likes "The rich never serve the same time the regular people do".

What's the standard poor people punishment for reckless driving while drunk and on cocaine again?


I'm only addressing the time served part. Cali prisons, especially those that house women, are overcrowded to the level that they make warehouses into huge cells that house 300-500 inmates. Non-violent offenders serve very little time and get released on parole.
 
2011-11-03 11:34:33 AM  
Sad to think this is all Fark has to obsess on, post-Britney.
 
2011-11-03 11:40:03 AM  
Hey judge, why not let Lindsay have the Photoshoot In jail?

images.huffingtonpost.com
 
2011-11-03 11:40:04 AM  

ddam: TheManofPA: ddam: 30 day jail sentence in Cali for women guilty of non-violent crimes ends up being 2 or 3 days. By Monday we'll have another thread of the likes "The rich never serve the same time the regular people do".

What's the standard poor people punishment for reckless driving while drunk and on cocaine again?

I'm only addressing the time served part. Cali prisons, especially those that house women, are overcrowded to the level that they make warehouses into huge cells that house 300-500 inmates. Non-violent offenders serve very little time and get released on parole.


I do doubt she'll serve the 30 days in the end. I would lean towards 5 days total with then some sort of double secret probation. Heck, I wouldn't be stunned anymore if it ended up being 14 hours of total time with half of that being processing. This is especially given the new delay.

Of course, then we get the fun of watching it all happen as she stops going to the morgue after the first 3 weeks of work and is found in Europe.
 
2011-11-03 11:41:04 AM  

Kurmudgeon: Sad to think this is all Fark has to obsess on, post-Britney.


Well, there was a time I would have done anything to Lindsay, now, I would at least entertain second thoughts, before diving in to that cesspool of disease and drug infested body. I would still hit it though, I won't lie, although I would feign shame like the last time I had sex with a fat chick.
 
2011-11-03 11:44:16 AM  

LectertheChef: I want to see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with a midget.

The whole midget, then have her shoot it out, and be forced to lick it clean. All the vaginal juices, blood, and whatever other effluents may have become stuck to the midget. Then I want her to be forced to remove one pound of her own flesh, cook it, and eat it. What part of her body the flesh comes from is unimportant, but it needs to be one pound, no more, no less. Then I'd like to see her sodomized by a dildo with rubber spikes, attached to a power drill.

Perhaps after that she could be paraded, nude and bloody, through the streets of Los Angeles. Her walk of shame, all the way to jail.


I think she'd be all for this, as long as she did a lot of drugs beforehand.
 
2011-11-03 11:46:09 AM  

LectertheChef: I want to see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with a midget.

The whole midget, then have her shoot it out, and be forced to lick it clean. All the vaginal juices, blood, and whatever other effluents may have become stuck to the midget. Then I want her to be forced to remove one pound of her own flesh, cook it, and eat it. What part of her body the flesh comes from is unimportant, but it needs to be one pound, no more, no less. Then I'd like to see her sodomized by a dildo with rubber spikes, attached to a power drill.

Perhaps after that she could be paraded, nude and bloody, through the streets of Los Angeles. Her walk of shame, all the way to jail.


That pretty much goes for me too, except that I'd also like to see her drawn and quartered, or similarly dismembered.
 
2011-11-03 11:48:35 AM  

Kurmudgeon: Sad to think this is all Fark has to obsess on, post-Britney.


There are some seriously demented people on Fark. Look at how they fawn over Adele and Christina Hendricks.

/ducks
 
2011-11-03 11:50:02 AM  
That's okay, I've always liked Kelly Clarkson more. She has a big butt.
 
2011-11-03 11:52:11 AM  

LectertheChef: I want to see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with a midget.

The whole midget, then have her shoot it out, and be forced to lick it clean. All the vaginal juices, blood, and whatever other effluents may have become stuck to the midget. Then I want her to be forced to remove one pound of her own flesh, cook it, and eat it. What part of her body the flesh comes from is unimportant, but it needs to be one pound, no more, no less. Then I'd like to see her sodomized by a dildo with rubber spikes, attached to a power drill.

Perhaps after that she could be paraded, nude and bloody, through the streets of Los Angeles. Her walk of shame, all the way to jail.


Please see a doctor.
 
2011-11-03 11:52:37 AM  
img546.imageshack.us
 
2011-11-03 11:55:03 AM  

LectertheChef: I want to see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with a midget.

The whole midget, then have her shoot it out, and be forced to lick it clean. All the vaginal juices, blood, and whatever other effluents may have become stuck to the midget. Then I want her to be forced to remove one pound of her own flesh, cook it, and eat it. What part of her body the flesh comes from is unimportant, but it needs to be one pound, no more, no less. Then I'd like to see her sodomized by a dildo with rubber spikes, attached to a power drill.

Perhaps after that she could be paraded, nude and bloody, through the streets of Los Angeles. Her walk of shame, all the way to jail.


Given your screen name, remind me never to eat at whatever mental institution you cook at.
 
2011-11-03 11:55:28 AM  

LectertheChef: I want to see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with a midget.

The whole midget, then have her shoot it out, and be forced to lick it clean. All the vaginal juices, blood, and whatever other effluents may have become stuck to the midget. Then I want her to be forced to remove one pound of her own flesh, cook it, and eat it. What part of her body the flesh comes from is unimportant, but it needs to be one pound, no more, no less. Then I'd like to see her sodomized by a dildo with rubber spikes, attached to a power drill.

Perhaps after that she could be paraded, nude and bloody, through the streets of Los Angeles. Her walk of shame, all the way to jail.


You're a man of ... *eclectic* tastes.
 
2011-11-03 11:56:16 AM  
The important lesson from all of this is how awesome a place LA is to commit crimes! Unless its a felony, regardless of the judge's sentence, you are only going to be locked up for a few hours.

Prison overcrowding > Tebow
 
2011-11-03 11:58:00 AM  

PsyLord: This photoshoot will go into the record book as the longest lasting photoshoot in the world... lasting 40 years!


She already has the skin of a 65-year old.
 
2011-11-03 11:58:40 AM  

scottydoesntknow: Huh, I would love to see if that excuse would work for the normal people of the USA.


It probably would. Charges aren't so serious they'd want to lock a person up right away and she's not a flight risk. Any half-competent attorney should be able to get the start of a sentence pushed off by a week for many reasons; work, wedding to attend, etc.
 
2011-11-03 12:03:05 PM  

hogans: LectertheChef: I want to see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with a midget.

The whole midget, then have her shoot it out, and be forced to lick it clean. All the vaginal juices, blood, and whatever other effluents may have become stuck to the midget. Then I want her to be forced to remove one pound of her own flesh, cook it, and eat it. What part of her body the flesh comes from is unimportant, but it needs to be one pound, no more, no less. Then I'd like to see her sodomized by a dildo with rubber spikes, attached to a power drill.

Perhaps after that she could be paraded, nude and bloody, through the streets of Los Angeles. Her walk of shame, all the way to jail.

That pretty much goes for me too, except that I'd also like to see her drawn and quartered, or similarly dismembered.


The problem with dismemberment is that you can only do it once, unless you're a very skilled surgeon. My way, she's still living, though delightfully disfigured, as well as the sweet, sweet degradation.
 
2011-11-03 12:03:21 PM  

PsyLord: This photoshoot will go into the record book as the longest lasting photoshoot in the world... lasting 40 years!


Approves:

www.prairieghosts.com

/obscure?
 
2011-11-03 12:04:34 PM  

Detinwolf: LectertheChef: I want to see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with a midget.

The whole midget, then have her shoot it out, and be forced to lick it clean. All the vaginal juices, blood, and whatever other effluents may have become stuck to the midget. Then I want her to be forced to remove one pound of her own flesh, cook it, and eat it. What part of her body the flesh comes from is unimportant, but it needs to be one pound, no more, no less. Then I'd like to see her sodomized by a dildo with rubber spikes, attached to a power drill.

Perhaps after that she could be paraded, nude and bloody, through the streets of Los Angeles. Her walk of shame, all the way to jail.

Please see a doctor.


Whatever for? I feel right as rain.
 
2011-11-03 12:06:03 PM  

Thelyphthoric: LectertheChef: I want to see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with a midget.

The whole midget, then have her shoot it out, and be forced to lick it clean. All the vaginal juices, blood, and whatever other effluents may have become stuck to the midget. Then I want her to be forced to remove one pound of her own flesh, cook it, and eat it. What part of her body the flesh comes from is unimportant, but it needs to be one pound, no more, no less. Then I'd like to see her sodomized by a dildo with rubber spikes, attached to a power drill.

Perhaps after that she could be paraded, nude and bloody, through the streets of Los Angeles. Her walk of shame, all the way to jail.

Given your screen name, remind me never to eat at whatever mental institution you cook at.


I'll have you know that the only mental institution I've spent any time in wouldn't let me anywhere near an open flame, or cutlery.
 
2011-11-03 12:09:21 PM  
In other news, mrs. Hayek remains hot and not in jail.
 
2011-11-03 12:09:37 PM  

Wellon Dowd: PsyLord: This photoshoot will go into the record book as the longest lasting photoshoot in the world... lasting 40 years!

She already has the skin of a 65-year old.


Hef and co will photoshop it into a plastic sheen.
 
2011-11-03 12:14:18 PM  

LectertheChef: I want to see Ms. Lohan having her womb filled with a midget.

The whole midget, then have her shoot it out, and be forced to lick it clean. All the vaginal juices, blood, and whatever other effluents may have become stuck to the midget. Then I want her to be forced to remove one pound of her own flesh, cook it, and eat it. What part of her body the flesh comes from is unimportant, but it needs to be one pound, no more, no less. Then I'd like to see her sodomized by a dildo with rubber spikes, attached to a power drill.

Perhaps after that she could be paraded, nude and bloody, through the streets of Los Angeles. Her walk of shame, all the way to jail.


so... tell me about your relationship with your mother.
 
2011-11-03 12:16:21 PM  
I will look at the photos online. And I would hit it!......while wearing a condom
 
2011-11-03 12:18:47 PM  
For all the Studmen69s in here, just remember kids, there is a new invention called Photoshop. If you think the Playboy spread is going to look like a meth / coke trainwreck, than your penises are in for a happy surprise.
 
2011-11-03 12:19:37 PM  
Cant we just toss her on an island for 30 days with a knife and 5 days of food?
 
2011-11-03 12:19:39 PM  
She also needs a three days to have some reinforcement work done on a few of her bras.

3.bp.blogspot.com

www.superphotospace.com

yeeeah.com
 
2011-11-03 12:27:55 PM  
I know I'm in the minority here, but I still would like to see her naked. I know she's a skank ho, but so are the porn starlets we all yank to on a regular basis.
 
2011-11-03 12:28:26 PM  
I've come to terms with the fact that we have lost Hot Lindsay, and she will most likely never come back, so I've moved on to the hot chick from the video tab, Chloe Wang...Hello Chloe.

www.alivenotdead.com
 
2011-11-03 12:35:51 PM  

Gunderson: Hey judge, why not let Lindsay have the Photoshoot In jail?


because it's for Playboy, not Hustler

/yet.
 
2011-11-03 12:40:29 PM  
This whole saga is ridiculous. They should have left her alone from the start. No one is going to stop her inevitable downward spiral, so stop wasting the time of law enforcement and the courts. If anything they're just making it worse.
 
2011-11-03 12:52:01 PM  
coeyagi
For all the Studmen69s in here, just remember kids, there is a new invention called Photoshop. If you think the Playboy spread is going to look like a meth / coke trainwreck, than your penises are in for a happy surprise

If they make it look like a normal Playboy photo[shoot|shop], I doubt that there will be a happy surprise as I'm not into anime/cartoon erotica.
 
2011-11-03 01:07:15 PM  
images.starpulse.com

jilliebee.files.wordpress.com
 
2011-11-03 01:15:12 PM  

Wellon Dowd: She also needs a three days to have some reinforcement work done on a few of her bras.

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 400x294]

[www.superphotospace.com image 376x400]

[yeeeah.com image 450x675]


Seeing as how she's not wearing a bra in any of those photos, it appears that either they were all dirty or she believes a breast's natural tendency to be perky is a permanent condition.

/her size breasts, that is
//big ones don't get to be perky
///sad
 
2011-11-03 01:16:49 PM  

buttery_shame_cave: so... tell me about your relationship with your mother.


img.photobucket.com
 
2011-11-03 01:35:16 PM  
This was supposed to be the December issue, now it's January!?

Wharr nooodz Lindsay wher?
 
Displayed 50 of 66 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all



This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report