Speaking as someone closer to 65 than 25,

Imokwiththis.jpg

Why do so many people on Fark get weirded out by geezer sex? Hint- you're going to be a geezer someday. You may want to turn celibate, but my junk still works and I have no plans to retire it anytime soon.

FirstNationalBastard: No, sorry, I'm too busy trying to push this cornish game hen through a pair of wrinkled grey drapes.

Don't forget the creampie.

I was eating a grilled cheese sandwich when I read that headline. Tripped me up for a moment.

Slow and sloppy.

I hope when we are old that 1) my husband still wants to have sex with me and 2) his penis still works

.

sorry shd have attributed it to xkcd

Old people need to stop being gross. First came the weird chewing, then came the constant rambling about their internal organs, then came the descriptions of creaky, slow, heavily medicated sex. I propose doubling every senior citizens' social security payout, as long as they take a vow of silence.

Glockenspiel Hero: Speaking as someone closer to 65 than 25,

Imokwiththis.jpg

Why do so many people on Fark get weirded out by geezer sex? Hint- you're going to be a geezer someday. You may want to turn celibate, but my junk still works and I have no plans to retire it anytime soon.

Because you farkers ruined everything for us. You lived the life of free love and then preached abstinence only. You lived for expanding the mind through drugs, and then started the War on Drugs. You lived during an age of wealth and made it to the top and then imposed impossible standard on the youth.

Now, you continue to rub it in our faces, now showing that you have enough time to fark like animals in your McMansions.

/slighty kidding

Japan's Booming Sex Niche: Elder Porn

Link (new window)

Imagine pulling apart two pieces of rancid pimento loaf. Imagine the smell.

Older people know what they want, and know how to get it.
If you have what they want, that is. :)

Unhip1: Older people know what they want, and know how to get it.
If you have what they want, that is. :)

Shouldn't you be in bed by now?

Older gents have way more skills and patience than the 20 something's. Also, more more confidence.

This gets my stamp of approval.

edmo:
In a discussion with my favorite teenager, she let me know that old people shouldn't have sex. I asked her how old is too old. I pressed for an exact age that she planned to give up sex. Thirty? Thirty-five?

Never did get an answer.

Loosen up the ropes a bit, and take the ball gag out of her mouth.

Old people today have more se...

NO! NO! I CAN'T HEAR YOU! Lalalalalala!

Let me revise my statement then....

I hope when we are old that my husband and I are willing to put forth the effort to pick up a supply of viagra and KY everymonth

Seeing as my Mom is in India right now (and that story comes from India ... ) I HOPE NOT!!!

That can wait until she gets back home to her husband in Tucson, then they can have at it, and lots, I hope, assuming he has recovered enough from spinal surgery.

/Seriously, I hope she has a ton more sex than I do ... my sex life is sad for mid-40s.

natmar_76: Old people today have more se...

NO! NO! I CAN'T HEAR YOU! Lalalalalala!

Neither can they!

So this means Gam-Gam really was a whore!

Although the percentage of individuals who are sexually active decreases with age, the study highlights the fact that a ''substantial number of men and women continue to engage in sexual activity.'' (new window)

Sarah Palin's Conscience: Glockenspiel Hero: Speaking as someone closer to 65 than 25,

Imokwiththis.jpg

Why do so many people on Fark get weirded out by geezer sex? Hint- you're going to be a geezer someday. You may want to turn celibate, but my junk still works and I have no plans to retire it anytime soon.

Because you farkers ruined everything for us. You lived the life of free love and then preached abstinence only. You lived for expanding the mind through drugs, and then started the War on Drugs. You lived during an age of wealth and made it to the top and then imposed impossible standard on the youth.

Now, you continue to rub it in our faces, now showing that you have enough time to fark like animals in your McMansions.

/slighty kidding

Hey, don't look at me- I'm not a boomer. Actually, I don't appear to be much of anything- I was born in 1966 and the baby boom ended in 1964, but gen X doesn't really kick in until later.

/Happy to have no label
//Unless it's a sexy one
///Sexy label party?

As the number of elderly rises worldwide, researchers find that old people today have more sex, are more likely to be divorced, are cleverer and feel better, and are more outgoing.

There are more older people. Therefore, a little pandering is in order.

Seriously people are living longer, healthier and freakin it up. I'd like to meet those people that said 'put a gun in my mouth when I hit 60 because I don't want to live the last years of my life drooling into the pillow I keep trying to kill myself with' and see if I can talk them into taking the gun at 50.

trappedspirit: As the number of elderly rises worldwide, researchers find that old people today have more sex, are more likely to be divorced, are cleverer and feel better, and are more outgoing.

There are more older people. Therefore, a little pandering is in order.

Seriously people are living longer, healthier and freakin it up. I'd like to meet those people that said 'put a gun in my mouth when I hit 60 because I don't want to live the last years of my life drooling into the pillow I keep trying to kill myself with' and see if I can talk them into taking the gun at 50.

You sound old.

I was asked if I was getting any on the side, but's been so long I didn't know they had moved it.

"Because in every Animal that walks upright, the Deficiency of the Fluids that fill the Muscles appears first in the highest Part: The Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement. "

-Ben Franklin FTW

moops: Imagine pulling apart two pieces of rancid pimento loaf. Imagine the smell.

Sounds like a Yeast Infection (NSFW)

old guys don't need viagra because their cocksafloppin, but because old women are farkin ugly

trappedspirit: Seriously people are living longer, healthier and freakin it up. I'd like to meet those people that said 'put a gun in my mouth when I hit 60 because I don't want to live the last years of my life drooling into the pillow I keep trying to kill myself with' and see if I can talk them into taking the gun at 50.

Being on the far side of 50 myself, I'd like to see them do that as well.

/our junk works just fine

Sarah Palin's Conscience:

Because you farkers ruined everything for us. You lived the life of free love and then preached abstinence only. You lived for expanding the mind through drugs, and then started the War on Drugs. You lived during an age of wealth and made it to the top and then imposed impossible standard on the youth.

Now, you continue to rub it in our faces, now showing that you have enough time to fark like animals in your McMansions.

/slighty kidding

so, my takeway is you want them to rub your face in it when they finish? all righty.
maybe they can also wring out the towel on the wheelchair seat over ya when they're done doin' it there.

enjoy dinner, everyone!

rfeick0: You sound old.

If you are lucky, one day you will too

endtimethirtyfour: Sarah Palin's Conscience:

Because you farkers ruined everything for us. You lived the life of free love and then preached abstinence only. You lived for expanding the mind through drugs, and then started the War on Drugs. You lived during an age of wealth and made it to the top and then imposed impossible standard on the youth.

Now, you continue to rub it in our faces, now showing that you have enough time to fark like animals in your McMansions.

/slighty kidding

so, my takeway is you want them to rub your face in it when they finish? all righty.
maybe they can also wring out the towel on the wheelchair seat over ya when they're done doin' it there.

enjoy dinner, everyone!

Lorelle: Sarah Palin's Conscience: Because you farkers ruined everything for us. You lived the life of free love and then preached abstinence only. You lived for expanding the mind through drugs, and then started the War on Drugs. You lived during an age of wealth and made it to the top and then imposed impossible standard on the youth.

Now, you continue to rub it in our faces, now showing that you have enough time to fark like animals in your McMansions.

/slighty kidding

Don't blame me, blame the 1%.

BTW, Nixon was responsible for starting the War on Drugs.

/our music is better than yours
//not kidding

Fair 'nuff.

I'll give you the 60s-early 70s and some 80s. I will NEVER forgive you for disco.

YouPeopleAreCrazy: Being on the far side of 50 myself, I'd like to see them do that as well.

/our junk works just fine

Ah, congrats. I just want to line up the ones who figured they'd be out to pasture by 60 and should be put out of their misery.

LOL at first I thought the picture showed an elderly gay couple kissing, then upon further inspection, I found out that the person on the left was actually an old lady!