I wonder what it would be like to crawl in a dead horse carcass and cover myself in blood and just hang out.

We arrested him because he butchered over 300 chickens and screwed a Beagal. I'm taking him back to Nevada where he's wanted for Bangin Horses'.

Is there some attraction swimming pools have for horses? I've seen a fair amount of stories like this over the years.

You can lead a horse to water...

Treygreen13: It's probably easier to get a dead horse out of a swimming pool.

Depends how many chicks crawled inside the dead horse.

I'm with you on that, macross87 and Treygreen13 and busychillin'. It seems like a frozen horse wouldn't be quite as yucky to crawl into. It'd be stuck in one configuration, not flopping all over your bare skin.

/mmm, frozen horse meat.
//now from Banquet! In your grocer's freezer!

At least they didn't kill it and climb inside to snap some classy photos.

The best thing that ever appeared in the Texas Bar Journal:

Actual filed court brief:

It weren't quite Christmas two years ago
There weren't any ice, weren't any snow
H.B. was checkin' the weather outside
Put a bridle on Bingo and went for a ride

Old Bingo (now dead) was a 'tankerous horse
Headstrong and heavy and horseshoed of course
He'd bite at the bridle and bay at the moon
And he'd be treadin' some water fore noon

H.B. and others, both cowgirl and male
Belonged to a club that rode on the trail
They'd drink in the glory of nature so dear
And drink in the sunshine and six packs of beer

Now H.B. knew Dennis, not friends but acquaints
They weren't neither sinners but nor were they saints
And H.B. kicked Bingo up through the backyard
With no malice forethought but to say "howdy, pard"

Dennis was doin' some burgers out back
To stave off the chill and a big mac attack
When out of the shadows H.B. rode in slow
Like a chubby Clint Eastwood astride old Bingo

Dennis flipped patties and thought "what the heck"
As H.B. loped Bingo up onto the deck
Of concrete quite slippry' surrounding the pool
And thought either horse or the riders' a fool

Then quick as a gunfight with thunder and fire
As quick as a S.O.S. sent out by wire
As quick as a kid turns a bedroom to trash
Old Bingo decided to go for a splash

With poor Mr. Armstrong hangin' on for dear life
Bingo did a gainer, swan dive and jackknife
Finished off with. a triple before he went in
Difficulty ranked seven but form got a ten

Dennis Duncan stood helpless, his burgers ablaze
While H.B. and Bingo were trapped in the maze
For logic and horse sense could certainly shout
That it was easier for Bingo to get in than out

So horseshoes were slashin' and runnin' amuck
The pool looked like it was hit by a truck
While H.B. was choking and gaspin' for air
Knowin' St. Nicholas wouldn't soon be there

Now the damage is done and Mr. Duncan seeks relief
For his pool and his pride and his burgers and grief
And the torment he's suffered cause a trespassin'fool
Rode a damned buckin' bronco smack dab in his pool.

"Well, to be fair, Mary, ... like I was sayin' to Old Man Gower just the other day ... those are some pretty tricky newfangled swimmin' pools they have nowadays ... why even here in good old Bedford ... "

"WILBPBPBURPRPRPRRRR!!!!1!!"

busy chillin': I wonder what it would be like to crawl in a dead horse carcass and cover myself in blood and just hang out.

macross87: Treygreen13: It's probably easier to get a dead horse out of a swimming pool.

Depends how many chicks crawled inside the dead horse.

mkrieger: At least they didn't kill it and climb inside to snap some classy photos.

I see I've been beaten to the punch.

/APPROVES

it's Bedford Falls!

Treygreen13: It's probably easier to get a dead horse out of a swimming pool.

only if you have a chainsaw.

+1, subby.

I LOLed.

Stile4aly Add Favorite Quote 2011-11-01 12:52:03 PM Ignore
You can lead a horse to water...

can you lift his head? All I'm getting is mud from the bottom.

I thought this was going to be about a horse in Bedford, New York. That would have been more hilarious because, if you know the people of Bedford, the headline would have read, "Horse dies in Bedford pool."

Other dancers unavailable for comment:

I bet I know who let the horse out of the barn-



// Too soon?

Wait, how else are you supposed to play water polo?

Wallll, for gawsh sakes, Mary!