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(Omaha World Herald) Dumbass Nebraska volleyball player turns herself in after hitting two motorcyclists with her jeep. And by turning herself in, the newspaper means she stopped a half-mile away because her front tire was shredded   (omaha.com) divider line 41
More: Dumbass, Nebraska, Grand Island, legal process, All-Americans, tires  
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2528 clicks; posted to Sports » on 31 Oct 2011 at 5:51 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



41 Comments   (+0 »)
   
 
Jamdug! [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 03:37:21 PM
Volleyball girl thread!
 
St_Francis_P [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 03:46:44 PM
This is really just a failure of preparedness. She needs the proper equipment if she plans to take out people without damaging her own vehicle.

www.madmaxmovies.com
 
basemetal [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 03:55:11 PM
i369.photobucket.com

I'd spike her......
 
mitchcumstein1 [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 04:02:22 PM
Any excuse to post this.

i386.photobucket.com

Go Jayhawks.
 
Because People in power are Stupid [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 04:44:32 PM
She's got a nice little turdcutter.

img.photobucket.com
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 04:48:11 PM
Cook failed to complete a recent driver improvement class, and her license was suspended this month, according to state records.

I'm glad when they put information like this in the article. Typical case. She probably sucks at driving, but she's suspended for not paying money to the ticketing industry (traffic school fee).

When asked if he was aware his daughter had a suspended license, John Cook said: "I can't comment on any of that."

John Cook thought, "Oh, crap. Letting her drive was a crime, wasn't it? Better not confess."
 
dartben [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 05:10:37 PM
ZAZ: Cook failed to complete a recent driver improvement class, and her license was suspended this month, according to state records.

I'm glad when they put information like this in the article. Typical case. She probably sucks at driving, but she's suspended for not paying money to the ticketing industry (traffic school fee).

According to a different article, she's been pulled over for speeding 6 times - she's done the STOP class twice and paid the fine/taken the points the other 4 times. Since she's 20, she's averaging about 1.5 speeding tickets/year.

Frankly, she deserves to have her license suspended, regardless of the actual reason why.
 
unlikely [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 05:42:02 PM
dartben: she deserves to have her license suspended

Hopefully "hit and run" covers that.
 
degenerate-afro
2011-10-31 05:54:21 PM
Jamdug!: Volleyball girl thread!

I had an awsome pic of a volleyball girl, but good ol' photobucket deleted it and girlfriend removed the backup. Now I'm in search of that same picture and hope someone has a copy and that it somehow makes it to this thread.

/definitely a bookmark.
 
Jim from Saint Paul
2011-10-31 06:12:15 PM
So a rich white girl tried to get away with comitting a crime.

Meh.

WHERE RAW THREAD?
 
eagles95
2011-10-31 06:19:14 PM
Jim from Saint Paul: So a rich white girl tried to get away with comitting a crime.

Meh.

WHERE RAW THREAD?

THIS!

//stattler and waldorf may actually do commentary on the Cole v JR mess
 
GleeUnit [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 06:25:43 PM
Because People in power are Stupid: She's got a nice little turdcutter.

You know, it immediately detracts from my ability to appreciate a well-formed ass when you fill my head with mental images of her pooping. Stop that.
 
Jim from Saint Paul
2011-10-31 06:26:22 PM
eagles95: Jim from Saint Paul: So a rich white girl tried to get away with comitting a crime.

Meh.

WHERE RAW THREAD?

THIS!

//stattler and waldorf may actually do commentary on the Cole v JR mess

I have to run out with the kids obviously soon too. I threw something together in honor of them.
 
GleeUnit [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 06:27:24 PM
GleeUnit: Because People in power are Stupid: She's got a nice little turdcutter.

You know, it immediately detracts from my ability to appreciate a well-formed ass when you fill my head with mental images of her pooping. Stop that.

Oops. I accidentally the italics.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 06:27:46 PM
So a rich white girl tried to get away with comitting a crime.

Rich white girl trying to get away with it would call daddy who would call his lawyer. I'll go with "inexperienced woman driver panicked when she hit something that came out of nowhere while she was looking at her cell phone and didn't regain her senses until she was blocks away and her wheels weren't turning very well."
 
peterstork670
2011-10-31 06:30:05 PM
Nebraska immediately forfeits all their home contests against Illinois this year, even those already played nine days or so ago.
 
Jim from Saint Paul
2011-10-31 06:39:37 PM
ZAZ: So a rich white girl tried to get away with comitting a crime.

Rich white girl trying to get away with it would call daddy who would call his lawyer. I'll go with "inexperienced woman driver panicked when she hit something that came out of nowhere while she was looking at her cell phone and didn't regain her senses until she was blocks away and her wheels weren't turning very well."

So we can at least agee that this happened because she's female then?
 
ThisNameSux
2011-10-31 06:46:24 PM
She's hot, let her off with a warning.
 
eagles95
2011-10-31 06:47:56 PM
Jim from Saint Paul: eagles95: Jim from Saint Paul: So a rich white girl tried to get away with comitting a crime.

Meh.

WHERE RAW THREAD?

THIS!

//stattler and waldorf may actually do commentary on the Cole v JR mess

I have to run out with the kids obviously soon too. I threw something together in honor of them.

I'm working till 8. Getting home, scrubbing my son's teeth and sending him to bed so i can witness then potential train wreck.
 
FlashHarry [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 06:55:13 PM
looks like somebody's precious snowflake isn't getting her hermès bag for christmas!
 
Droog8912
2011-10-31 06:55:32 PM
ThisNameSux: She's hot, let her off with a warning barebottom spanking.

FTFY.
 
Jim from Saint Paul
2011-10-31 06:57:45 PM
Droog8912: ThisNameSux: She's hot, let her off with a warning barebottom spanking.

FTFY.

monty-python-and-the-holy-grail.com
 
Rapmaster2000
2011-10-31 07:01:56 PM
I'd hit it on the side of the road.
 
What_Would_Jimi_Do
2011-10-31 07:04:09 PM
TOT MOM?
 
monsatano
2011-10-31 07:11:06 PM
farm4.static.flickr.com

/yay
 
expobill
2011-10-31 07:46:03 PM
WIOW, what a sad story, any involving motorcylists being hit is horrible, let alone being abandoned is a crime.
being from Madison -a season ticket holder for the Vball team- where her Father coached the badgers years ago, this story is sad and kind of personal.
 
SlothB77 [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 07:51:46 PM
i'm a better driver drunk than she is sober.
 
urban.derelict
2011-10-31 07:56:36 PM
mitchcumstein1: Any excuse to post this.

a7.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net


/ladies: EIP
 
Jamdug! [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 08:24:33 PM
degenerate-afro: Jamdug!: Volleyball girl thread!

I had an awsome pic of a volleyball girl, but good ol' photobucket deleted it and girlfriend removed the backup. Now I'm in search of that same picture and hope someone has a copy and that it somehow makes it to this thread.

/definitely a bookmark.

Well if you find it, plz post for the good of humanity!
 
velvet_fog
2011-10-31 08:38:10 PM
Glad to see Lauren Cook is continuing the Husker tradition of off-field excellence started by Lawrence Phillips and exemplified by Thunder Collins.

/she'll probably be conveniently reinstated just in time for the NCAA tournament
//the Husker way
 
Deranger
2011-10-31 08:58:39 PM
What_Would_Jimi_Do: TOT MOM?

zackly what I thought.
 
astro716
2011-10-31 09:16:56 PM
Nebraska, where the N is for Knowledge of BAC and hit & run laws...
 
The Smails Kid
2011-10-31 09:50:33 PM
SlothB77: i'm a better driver drunk than she is sober.
 
video man [TotalFark]
2011-10-31 10:02:23 PM
astro716: Nebraska, where the N is for Knowledge of BAC and hit & run laws...

.02 if you're under 21, .08 if you're over 21. First time possession of marijuana (under 1 oz) is a civil citation, and a 350 dollar fine. All subsequent offenses are misdemeanors. Paraphernalia is always a civil citation, and a $100 fine.

You're damn right I know that off the top of my head.
 
chuggernaught
2011-10-31 10:53:45 PM
velvet_fog: Glad to see Lauren Cook is continuing the Husker tradition of off-field excellence started by Lawrence Phillips and exemplified by Thunder Collins.

/she'll probably be conveniently reinstated just in time for the NCAA tournament
//the Husker way

Yup. God, Thunder Collins, there's a name I had happily forgotten.

Dr. Tom better put his AD foot down and have her kicked off the team. But, he'll probably see it as an opportunity to educate her and let her slide.

In other news, I believe the NU volleyball team is doing quite well in the B1G.
 
r1niceboy
2011-11-01 01:05:11 AM
To her credit, her vision was obscured. Taylor Martinez wanted a blowjob, but missed her mouth and put her eye out.
 
video man [TotalFark]
2011-11-01 01:56:55 AM
r1niceboy: To her credit, her vision was obscured. Taylor Martinez wanted a blowjob, but missed her mouth and put her eye out.

That's because he jerks off the wrong way.
 
baufan2005
2011-11-01 06:25:53 AM
dartben: ZAZ: Cook failed to complete a recent driver improvement class, and her license was suspended this month, according to state records.

I'm glad when they put information like this in the article. Typical case. She probably sucks at driving, but she's suspended for not paying money to the ticketing industry (traffic school fee).

According to a different article, she's been pulled over for speeding 6 times - she's done the STOP class twice and paid the fine/taken the points the other 4 times. Since she's 20, she's averaging about 1.5 speeding tickets/year.

Frankly, she deserves to have her license suspended, regardless of the actual reason why.

No she doesn't, she's cute so she deserves a free pass... on to my penis.
 
OtherLittleGuy [TotalFark]
2011-11-01 09:26:55 AM
And this is the difference between men's sports and women's sports.

If she was a man, they would have hushed it up until the postseason, then vacated the wins, lost the scholarships, received the postseason ban, and fired the AD and coach.

In this case, they just throw her under the bus and be done with it.
 
cleveoh
2011-11-01 09:35:33 AM
John Cook...said he had been in contact with Nebraska Athletic Director Tom Osborne about athletic department procedures on dealing with arrests.

Well then, everyone should feel better that this is in the hands of a man who always acted appropriately on occasions when atheletes got in troulble...cough... Lawrence Phillips...cough
 
dang sure
2011-11-01 12:14:57 PM
Pay attention while driving, damn

at least the bikers aren't totalled,

don't really see why sober and stupid driving incident should effect her status as a student or volleyball player
 
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