Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Reuters)   Unwilling to let the US maintain a lead in any technology, Russia unveils a drunk, naked driver that can smash up 17 vehicles in downtown Moscow. US feverishly working on 20-car naked drunk driver technology   (af.reuters.com) divider line 30
    More: Strange, Russia, Moscow, drunk drivers, bus drivers  
•       •       •

3691 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Oct 2011 at 8:33 AM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



30 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2011-10-31 08:40:22 AM  
Dad?
 
2011-10-31 08:41:01 AM  
Did America hold the lead in this earlier?
 
2011-10-31 08:43:33 AM  
I'm getting 500 errors on some stories. Is anyone else experiencing intermittent story outages?
 
2011-10-31 08:50:22 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: I'm getting 500 errors on some stories. Is anyone else experiencing intermittent story outages?


I'm getting errors on loading some comment pages. Been happening all morning.
 
2011-10-31 08:50:44 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: Did America hold the lead in this earlier?


America has been leading the nation based on alcohol availability and number of roads, as well as average distance between drinking establishments and residential areas, but American researchers have had trouble breaking the 15-car limit for naked drunk drivers that was achieved in 1979 and has been the baseline for naked drunk driver technology since.

In 2008, Florida scienticians announced a driver that they said could smash up to 20 vehicles while drunk and naked, but independent labs were unable to replicate the findings. Typically, results are limited because 1) people that are naked and drunk typically aren't in the mood to drive; 2) the average drunk driver sees a 14% dropoff in vehicles smashed when he (or she) is naked; and 3) there is a balance that must be achieved in terms of vehicle speed and durability to smash more than six other vehicles, and generally speaking, in areas where there is a sufficient density of victim vehicles, naked people are apprehended before they're able to drive off.
 
2011-10-31 08:54:19 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: I'm getting 500 errors on some stories. Is anyone else experiencing intermittent story outages?

> Tebow
 
2011-10-31 08:57:55 AM  
What qualifies as abnormally high in Russia?
 
2011-10-31 08:59:08 AM  
give lindsay lohan time... she'll get the record back...

USA! USA! USA!
 
2011-10-31 08:59:33 AM  

Minimally Hairy Beer-Powered Simian: AverageAmericanGuy: I'm getting 500 errors on some stories. Is anyone else experiencing intermittent story outages?

I'm getting errors on loading some comment pages. Been happening all morning.


Same here. Some threads, like this one obviously, show up fine for me, while others give me a 500 error (and no mention of this on the outage page)
 
2011-10-31 09:03:48 AM  

King Something: Minimally Hairy Beer-Powered Simian: AverageAmericanGuy: I'm getting 500 errors on some stories. Is anyone else experiencing intermittent story outages?

I'm getting errors on loading some comment pages. Been happening all morning.

Same here. Some threads, like this one obviously, show up fine for me, while others give me a 500 error (and no mention of this on the outage page)


Yeah, me too. Admins? Are you guys still passed out from the weekend?
 
2011-10-31 09:11:35 AM  
Another triumph of mother Russia over the capitalist pigs.

Союз нерушимый республик свободных Сплотила навеки Великая Русь. Да здравствует созданный волей народов Единый, могучий Советский Союз! ПРИПЕВ: Славься, Отечество наше свободное, Дружбы народов надёжный оплот! Знамя советское, знамя народное Пусть от победы к победе ведёт!
 
2011-10-31 09:14:13 AM  
Mr. President, we must not alllooooooooowwwww, a NAKED DRUNK DRIVER GAP!
 
2011-10-31 09:30:15 AM  
TV pictures showed distressed drivers with bloodied hands and faces sitting in their cars

Why did I read that as "hands and feces?
 
2011-10-31 09:30:24 AM  
I enjoyed getting the error page this a.m. That photo is truly awesome.
 
2011-10-31 09:32:31 AM  
Pics and video or GTFO (NSFW probably)
 
2011-10-31 09:35:51 AM  
Or as the Russians like to call it, "Monday"
 
2011-10-31 09:39:28 AM  
We CANNOT allow a drunk, crazy guy gap! This country has gone soft. Get to drinkin' and doing crazy things 'merica!
 
2011-10-31 09:56:09 AM  
2.bp.blogspot.com

'Mr President, we cannot allow a naked drunk driver gap!'
 
2011-10-31 09:58:29 AM  
We have a drunk naked driver gap

jdudar.com
 
2011-10-31 10:20:09 AM  
Ludmilla : Zis iz Antonov. He haz a second liver und can process over one liter of Vodak and hour. When he is intoxicated, his eyes are specially trained to see quadruple and he believes he can drive anything.

When he is in his automobile and he makes impact with a stationary object, his body will actually compact and negate the impact the steering wheel creates. He is genetically designed to continue driving at all times.

Your weak American driver can not process the volume of alcohol Antonov can. Your weak American bodies cannot take the impact of one vehicle let alone 30. Anyone who dares gets in the way of Antonov will get plowed over like a 1985 Yugo.

Adrian: You can't face him Rocky! You've never even smashed through 10 cars.

Rocky: Hey. All this talk is getting me thirty. Hey Antonov! What do you say to a B double E double R U N? First one to Denver gets to make a joke about Coors Beer.
 
2011-10-31 10:34:00 AM  
I think Jason Bourne's cover has been blown.
 
2011-10-31 10:43:45 AM  
Loving the Dr. Strangelove references. Exactly what I was thinking too. Great movie, older than I am.
 
2011-10-31 10:47:54 AM  

SmackLT: AverageAmericanGuy: Did America hold the lead in this earlier?

America has been leading the nation based on alcohol availability and number of roads, as well as average distance between drinking establishments and residential areas, but American researchers have had trouble breaking the 15-car limit for naked drunk drivers that was achieved in 1979 and has been the baseline for naked drunk driver technology since.

In 2008, Florida scienticians announced a driver that they said could smash up to 20 vehicles while drunk and naked, but independent labs were unable to replicate the findings. Typically, results are limited because 1) people that are naked and drunk typically aren't in the mood to drive; 2) the average drunk driver sees a 14% dropoff in vehicles smashed when he (or she) is naked; and 3) there is a balance that must be achieved in terms of vehicle speed and durability to smash more than six other vehicles, and generally speaking, in areas where there is a sufficient density of victim vehicles, naked people are apprehended before they're able to drive off.


/Pins a gold star on your forehead.

//nicely done!
 
2011-10-31 10:58:53 AM  
What was Drew doing in Russia?
 
2011-10-31 10:59:00 AM  

Fuggin Bizzy: Loving the Dr. Strangelove references. Exactly what I was thinking too. Great movie, older than I am.


"Christ, I miss the Cold War. "

ultimatejamesbond.files.wordpress.com
 
2011-10-31 11:03:01 AM  

gregoire4: Mr. President, we must not alllooooooooowwwww, a NAKED DRUNK DRIVER GAP!


leaving satisfied.
 
2011-10-31 11:47:37 AM  
Somehow I read the headline as Tavarish (russian word technically meaning Friend)instead of feverishly.
 
2011-10-31 01:12:46 PM  
I thought Boris Yeltsin was dead.
 
2011-10-31 01:28:55 PM  
I thought they called that Wednesday in Moscow.

Also, approves:

piddleville.com

/obligatory
 
2011-10-31 10:56:38 PM  
We have the technology, now we just need the right Redneck.
http://www.hankstruckpictures.com/pix/trucks/ryan_pedone/2011/07-10/o r _dot/odot_autocar_dk_4x4_snowplow.jpg
 
Displayed 30 of 30 comments



This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report