Squirrels just want to have fun.

But what about Moose?

Grables'Daughter: FTA: Eager for the trauma to be over, he appealed to the local authority for the right to take revenge on the squirrel and murder it to death.

I've been murdered before, but never murdered to death.

jehovahs witness protection: Glad we don't need permission here. Killed 4 of the little bastards yesterday.

I hate those little tree rat sumbiatches. Nothing worse than trying to hunt and have one run up and start barking. If Rage broadheads weren't so damned expensive....

Squirrels are more dangerous than you might think.

First thing I thought of



Well after their dead they don't seem so evil


/ SQUARREL!

Permission? Screw that. I've got about a dozen of those little bastards in my back yard and their soul purpose in life is to piss off my Vizsla/Basset mix and my Pit Bull...They are about to meet the wrath of my wrist rocket and I'll be damned if I'm going to get permission to do it.

He must live somewhere a nice, quiet .177 air gun is illegal.

Threads getting all chopped out up in here.

So....

What's with all the Shortlist.com links? Are they a new Cracked.com Partner?

Get a rat trap.

Cross out the word "rat" and write in "squirrel".

Apply peanut butter, stick peanut to peanut butter.

Open beer.

Enjoy.

I use this to remove them from my "death tree". Record is five hits in a row.

Them's good eatin'.

TKM: Get a rat trap.

Cross out the word "rat" and write in "squirrel".


Col. SS Hans Landa approves

Now if only we could say the same for wives and gods.

/and I happen to like squirrels so fark you

We actually have white-furred ones in our backyard (not albinos as they don't have red eyes) and every time someone coos over how "cute" they are, I say the same thing: "They are just bushy-tailed rats and nuisances, and whenever one dies, an angel somewhere gets its wings."

Tired of them destroying everything in the yard. Despise the vermin.

/good luck Mr. I-Need-Legal-Approval-To-Do-Something-That-Should-Be-A-God-Given-Right .

One of those little bastards shat all over my kitchen thrice this summer. This helped:

Pellet gun.

My gpa and I sat outside his house this past weekend waiting for squirrels to assault his grapefruit tree. It was wonderful bonding time.

I must be the only guy in the world who likes squirrels. Always found them cute...also had fun watching them torment my in-laws Dachsund. Never had an issue with them.

Squirrels are cool. Some of them around where I live are so used to humans, they'll walk right up to you if you offer them food.

Little farkers about wiped out my tomato crop this year. I only slightly stemmed the tide by trapping a dozen of the little bastards and offloading them.

I have as many now as I did during the growing season. Only thing stopping me from getting a Gamo Whisper is I'm an animal lover. They are, however, testing my will.

Improper Usage: TKM: Get a rat trap.

Cross out the word "rat" and write in "squirrel".


Col. SS Hans Landa approves

Don't bring religion into this!

My dog killed his first squirrel yesterday after attempting to grab one all summer. My dog is now a man. Er, adult.

ThisNameSux: Squirrels are cool. Some of them around where I live are so used to humans, they'll walk right up to you if you offer them food.


Sure, start giving them Squirrel Welfare.

The next thing you know they're smoking crack, burglarizing your house, robbing convenience stores and turning tricks on the street corner.

FTFA: Eager for the trauma to be over, he appealed to the local authority for the right to take revenge on the squirrel and murder it to death.

Squirrels are messengers from God.

So I've gathered some things about this Shortlist website, from prior fark comments and their website:

It tries to be liked Cracked.
The owner of shortlist gives BJs to a fark modmin to get their shiat greenlit.
It's rarely funny.


Can a TFer confirm or deny my findings?

Amos Quito: ThisNameSux: Squirrels are cool. Some of them around where I live are so used to humans, they'll walk right up to you if you offer them food.


Sure, start giving them Squirrel Welfare.

The next thing you know they're smoking crack, burglarizing your house, robbing convenience stores and turning tricks on the street corner.

I'm pretty sure I live in what could be considered the Detroit of squirrel habitats. Acorns are one helluva drug.

LOL I have a few squirrels around me, I feed them daily from a light pole - they come out of a tree across the street, across the wires and down the pole, every day around 5:30pm I feed em a handful.

Never bothered me or my dogs, neighbor however... is tired of the nascar circuit in his attic from the squirrels running around.

/recently trapped a cat in my yard trying to kill the squirrel, poor kitty got itself a death sentence

//Cats are far more annoying then squirrels in my area, wish I could trap and sell to chinese restaurants, meow yung chicken anyone?

Squirrel launching compilation video.

Link (new window)

Hawnkee: Squirrels are messengers from God.

They usually get killed too.