St_Francis_P: It's a familiar story.

He just can't make his apartment a safe space for women (new window)

funny

Mugato: You're supposed to call your agent and he'll send someone over to fix it.

I'd call Wilt Chamberlain. If anyone has been through this, I'm sure it's him!

special20: Taking the stand in his own defense.... FAIL.

Taking the stand in his own defense trying to convince the jury that he is a liar and mentally disturbed. .... EXTRA FAIL!

I believe him. It happens all the time.

A dead female what?

/dnrtfa

Taking lessons from OJ?

"If i did it"

Ted Kennedy had a similar problem.

So let me get this straight. There is some way to "work the system" where you confess to murdering someone (or two someones) and dumping their body, but it's really all a lie?

Seems to me that the "yeah we were doing drugs together, she must have done too much while I was in the bathroom passed out. Next time I'll make sure the bottle is child resistant" method would be more likely to save your life.

That or the OJ method. Just remember to buy gloves one size too small. I know it's uncomfortable during the slaying, but it helps during the grandstanding part in court.

Chevello: So let me get this straight. There is some way to "work the system" where you confess to murdering someone (or two someones) and dumping their body, but it's really all a lie?

No, there needs to be evidence in addition to a confession.


That or the OJ method. Just remember to buy gloves one size too small. I know it's uncomfortable during the slaying, but it helps during the grandstanding part in court.

Dude, he was trying to slide fur-lined gloves onto rubber gloves. Do you not see the problem? If not, blow up a balloon and rub it on your head.

/still getting trolled a decade later

Chevello: So let me get this straight. There is some way to "work the system" where you confess to murdering someone (or two someones) and dumping their body, but it's really all a lie?

Seems to me that the "yeah we were doing drugs together, she must have done too much while I was in the bathroom passed out. Next time I'll make sure the bottle is child resistant" method would be more likely to save your life.

That or the OJ method. Just remember to buy gloves one size too small. I know it's uncomfortable during the slaying, but it helps during the grandstanding part in court.

OJ with the gloves?

Funny thing about that. They seemed to fit just fine after he started taking his prescribed anti-inflammatories again.

It was a smart, albeit dishonest play by his lawyers. Had the prosecutors not been so busy sleeping with anything that moved (due to newfound fame), they might have noticed that little trick.

Come on, Ted, Admit it. That is something you will rarely hear me say. Nothing irritates me more than people who try to work the system. It makes the people who really do have reasonable doubt look absurd. Personally, I think he should man up and break out in a chorus line.

/ding ding, the biatch is dead...she won't get out of bed...the biatch is dead (whatever)

He's right. On cop shows, the people who find the body promptly vanish, never to be seen again, or once in a blue moon come back forty minutes in as a major twist. That's not how it works in the real world. If you call in a body, unless there's an obvious suspect, the police will arrest you. And the fact is that if we actually held our courts to the standard of evidence that we claim to, the jails would be empty; it's only the prosecutor's fallacy that allows our cognitive dissonance, especially now that our economy's backbone is prison labor. So if you call the police, you'll more likely than not go to prison.

So why do they follow these conventions on TV? Five words: "promotion of the useful arts." Discourage snitching, you don't get paid.

AuntNotAnt: He's right. On cop shows, the people who find the body promptly vanish, never to be seen again, or once in a blue moon come back forty minutes in as a major twist. That's not how it works in the real world. If you call in a body, unless there's an obvious suspect, the police will arrest you. And the fact is that if we actually held our courts to the standard of evidence that we claim to, the jails would be empty; it's only the prosecutor's fallacy that allows our cognitive dissonance, especially now that our economy's backbone is prison labor. So if you call the police, you'll more likely than not go to prison.

So why do they follow these conventions on TV? Five words: "promotion of the useful arts." Discourage snitching, you don't get paid.

Having never killed anyone or found a dead body, I can't speak from experience, but how often do people report dead bodies of complete strangers with whose demise they had absolutely nothing to do? I think that if someone reports a dead body in their own home police should at least investigate whether they had anything to do with it. I also doubt that in the typical TV-scenario of a jogger or man walking his dog finding a corpse in a park they have much to fear from the cops.

EditorialSpace: Come on, Ted, Admit it. That is something you will rarely hear me say. Nothing irritates me more than people who try to work the system. It makes the people who really do have reasonable doubt look absurd. Personally, I think he should man up and break out in a chorus line.

/ding ding, the biatch is dead...she won't get out of bed...the biatch is dead (whatever)

Because sex is violence? Be ause your sister's not a virgin anymore?

Loki-L: AuntNotAnt: He's right. On cop shows, the people who find the body promptly vanish, never to be seen again, or once in a blue moon come back forty minutes in as a major twist. That's not how it works in the real world. If you call in a body, unless there's an obvious suspect, the police will arrest you. And the fact is that if we actually held our courts to the standard of evidence that we claim to, the jails would be empty; it's only the prosecutor's fallacy that allows our cognitive dissonance, especially now that our economy's backbone is prison labor. So if you call the police, you'll more likely than not go to prison.

So why do they follow these conventions on TV? Five words: "promotion of the useful arts." Discourage snitching, you don't get paid.

Having never killed anyone or found a dead body, I can't speak from experience, but how often do people report dead bodies of complete strangers with whose demise they had absolutely nothing to do? I think that if someone reports a dead body in their own home police should at least investigate whether they had anything to do with it. I also doubt that in the typical TV-scenario of a jogger or man walking his dog finding a corpse in a park they have much to fear from the cops.

This. I seriously doubt the police would arrest someone who stumbles over a body. Also arrest doesn't mean the same as prosecuted. Also being taking to the police station for questioning (IE getting everything on the record so it will help the investigation) does not equal arrested.

This guy isn't denying that he killed her. He's arguing that he killed her accidentally, while on a crack binge. He's also saying that after killing her accidentally, he dumped the body and set it on fire. And that his confessions were lies.

That's his defense. There are also 2 other murders he's been accused of, and he's a career criminal.

Even if you believe his story, he sounds like the kind of person who should never walk free again.

Well, to his credit, it wasn't his momma.

thatboyoverthere: Loki-L: AuntNotAnt: He's right. On cop shows, the people who find the body promptly vanish, never to be seen again, or once in a blue moon come back forty minutes in as a major twist. That's not how it works in the real world. If you call in a body, unless there's an obvious suspect, the police will arrest you. And the fact is that if we actually held our courts to the standard of evidence that we claim to, the jails would be empty; it's only the prosecutor's fallacy that allows our cognitive dissonance, especially now that our economy's backbone is prison labor. So if you call the police, you'll more likely than not go to prison.

So why do they follow these conventions on TV? Five words: "promotion of the useful arts." Discourage snitching, you don't get paid.

Having never killed anyone or found a dead body, I can't speak from experience, but how often do people report dead bodies of complete strangers with whose demise they had absolutely nothing to do? I think that if someone reports a dead body in their own home police should at least investigate whether they had anything to do with it. I also doubt that in the typical TV-scenario of a jogger or man walking his dog finding a corpse in a park they have much to fear from the cops.

This. I seriously doubt the police would arrest someone who stumbles over a body. Also arrest doesn't mean the same as prosecuted. Also being taking to the police station for questioning (IE getting everything on the record so it will help the investigation) does not equal arrested.

Having called to report a dead hobo near the railroad tracks behind my store less about a year ago, I can say that they most certainly do not arrest you for simply reporting a body. I gave a short report and never heard another word about it from anyone.

I do admit this is a fair bit different than reporting someone dead in my own bed but unless there were obvious signs pointing toward homicide I doubt the outcome would be any different. Whether they come back and arrest you later in this circumstance is another story entirely.

AuntNotAnt: He's right. On cop shows, the people who find the body promptly vanish, never to be seen again, or once in a blue moon come back forty minutes in as a major twist. That's not how it works in the real world. If you call in a body, unless there's an obvious suspect, the police will arrest you. And the fact is that if we actually held our courts to the standard of evidence that we claim to, the jails would be empty; it's only the prosecutor's fallacy that allows our cognitive dissonance, especially now that our economy's backbone is prison labor. So if you call the police, you'll more likely than not go to prison.

So why do they follow these conventions on TV? Five words: "promotion of the useful arts." Discourage snitching, you don't get paid.

I had the unfortunate experience of finding a roommate dead in her bed from a brain aneurysm...

The police were pretty much douchebags but hey they didn't arrest or detain me

"Sounds sick and cruel and cold but I was pissed off at Randi for dying,"

Yeah, what the fark was her problem, anyway? I seem to get through my days just fine without dieing, why couldn't she? Selfish biatch was so inconsiderate.

canavar: I had the unfortunate experience of finding a roommate dead in her bed from a brain aneurysm...

The police were pretty much douchebags but hey they didn't arrest or detain me

They had a suspect.

That's just what John Goodman wants you to do. You're playing right into his hands.

I hope he farked her befor calling the police since it may be his last chance at a female (Dead or Alive) for awhile.

I can think of one thing that would make me tell the cops that. If I found a dead female in my bed.

Ed Finnerty I guess the Investigator's report was correct - she was smokin' hot.

I do like how he was also 'dating' her older sister...
http://www.gastongazette.com/articles/heather-62420-hembree-catterton . html

all her mugshot photos seem Faces-Of-Methy
http://www.shelbystar.com/sections/article/gallery/?pic=1&id=43470
http://www.myspace.com/453118130/photos

seems like Green River/Hillside Strangler kind've a gal, the kind that made groups mad when San Diego PD labeled these cases NHI...
http://www.gastongazette.com/news/police-29742-department-arrest.html # ixzz1cCDLIw94
Catterton, Heather Marie 16 2404 S York Rd, Gastonia, NC 1/24/09 2:20 AM Fraud-Impersonation Johns Ln & S Perry St Williams, C. B. 21122 2009-00006403

He sounds like a psychopath who only "read the manual" after his arrest. Oops...

Sounds like a 10-82 to me...

FredaDeStilleto: Ted Kennedy Joe Scarborough had a similar problem.

/ftfy

Explaining the dead female is easy.

Explaining the live boy is hard.

Don't ask about the donkey. Just don't.