A man, a plan, a sandwich...Manwich!

I prefer the "HO HAULER" guy.

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Few criminals have had the career of Carl "Meszmeriso" Collins. At just eighteen, he tried to rob a bank using what the teller described as "Jedi Mind Tricks". After grabbing the money, he tried to flee on a steam roller. Police easily caught him and sent him to jail.

While awaiting trial, Meszmeriso put himself in to a walking coma. Unable to act in his defense, he was released on a technicality. He then went back to his life of crime.

Whether it was robbing a gas station or the Federal Reserve, Meszmeriso always chose poor escape vhicles. Police arrested him on a Zamboni, electric golf cart and even meter maid's Cushman three wheeler. Each time, Meszmeriso would place himself back in to a coma to await his inevitable release.

Sadly for him, his last arrest meant he would have to spend time in county. The county lock up is a dorm style jail where the inmates have much greater mobility with in the jail and hence, more freedom. The fact that Meszmeriso appeared at his arraignment sans pants proved that he did not get to sit in quiet comatose peacefulness at the jail but was more likely passed around like a joint at a Phish concert.

It is expected that Meszmeriso will be hosed down and eventually released from jail.

Dude(McLargehuge) watched Space Mutiny too many times, thought he could get away from the evil Kalgon(take me away!) while also buffing the floor.

"Faulkner was charged with theft and receiving stolen property."

Receiving stolen property? Was he trying to fence the sandwich? Or is it that he received the stolen property as a consequence of having it in his possession when he stole it?

No, it's a plan. Not a good plan, but a plan.