I think Palestine should forget about the importing and concentrate solely on the exporting.

Peres: Please allow me to call you 'George.'


From what I understand actors usually hate being called by their character names, especially if it's a role they're trying to live down. There could have been a fatwa right there.

What? You know he always wanted to pretend to be an architect

Maybe they should all start manufacturing latex?

For an article that takes this more seriously see:
"Alexander shows serious side, discusses peace with Peres"
http://www.jpost.com/DiplomacyAndPolitics/Article.aspx?id=243178

Getting back to Seinfeld, Peres commented that what he'd loved about the series was that it conveyed serious messages in a humorous manner, which in his view was quite convincing. He was curious whether humor could play a part in resolving the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.

"I wish humor could do the job," said Alexander. "Of course you can't involve Jews without a good sense of humor, but the problem is you always hurt someone."

Alexander* was serious, but Sharon derailed him by asking if he could call him George and then for 'advice', which is always reduced to ridiculous sound bites, "Don't give up." "Really? Thanks. Let me write that down." Alexander needed more street cred before meeting with Sharon. 'Featuring' him delivered media attention, but at the risk of OneVoice being labeled naive, lightweight or inept.

* born Jay Scott Greenspan; I suppose someone in the WWF had already taken Jason Atilla.

It's all fun and games for the Jews until the soap Nazi shows up.

/nobody likes Jewish soap

Syria is of course Puddy.

80 Palestinian children killed in gunship attack on elementary school believed to be a hideout for insurgents.

First of all, the above never happened. Not sure that everyone is clear on that. And there is ample evidence that the Palestinians do in fact use schools, mosques and ambulences to hide behind when launching attacks.

The Palestinians aren't the ones with the advanced military and U.S. support.

True, and not only that, they are the ones who "lost". Normally, when you lose the war, you sue for peace, try to get reasonable terms, pick up the pieces of your country and move on with your lives.

But because of limitless UN funding (sort of the converse of the US support for Israel), the Palestinians have no motivations to do so, and have kept the war going for decades.

To repeat a comment from above: If they wanted it; they could have peace tomorrow.

Uncle Leo as Saudi Arabia?

France: J. Peterman

Who is Bana?

The Moops are Spain.

AverageAmericanGuy: FarkedUBAR: To repeat a comment from above: If they wanted it; they could have peace tomorrow.

Why not today?

They are 7 hours ahead of us. It is already the afternoon. And, being the middle east, people knock off work early there. So I'm just being pragmatic.

Seinfeld - The Lost Episode
Jerry's Apartment. Jerry is there. George enters.

George: (Excited) Well, it's been decided. I'm applying for statehood.
Jerry: You?
George: Yep. I'm going down to the UN today. I got my paperwork and everything.
Jerry: Do you think that's a good idea? Statehood?
George: Look what it's done for you. You're making trade agreements, playing on the world stage. Not to mention all the ladies.
Jerry: It's a big responsibility, George. You can't just 'get' statehood.

Kramer enters the apartment and goes to the refrigerator.

Jerry: What's this? Why are you in my refrigerator?
Kramer: I was just looking for a little nosh. My icebox is empty.
George: Icebox? Really?
Kramer: Well, all it has in it is ice, so...Yeah.
Jerry: That's it! Kramer, I am annexing your apartment for security reasons. Get out of here and do not return without proper papers.
Kramer: But where will I live?
Jerry: Go live with Newman. It doesn't matter to me. I require security and peace. And your statehood, George. Let me tell this. I have powerful friends at the UN. They will block your application. Now leave! Both of you.
George: Statehood! I thought we could be partners!
Jerry: Bah! I say Bah! to your statehood. You'd just sign treaties of aggression and mutual protection with Newman and Kramer. You'd be at my throat in no time! Now go. I have the right to security and peace.
Kramer: (pleading) But buddy.
Jerry: Begone!
George: (angry) I will get my statehood! Mark my words!
Jerry: Go. Both of you. Go. Maybe we can meet at Monks and discuss security issues. Call my undersecretary.

Kramer and George leave.

Jerry picks up the phone.

Jerry: Elaine, I need a favor. George is applying for statehood.(pause) I know. What's got in to his head? I need you to usurp his application. No. I don't know if it was ever surped. Does something have to be surped before it can be usurp? I can count on you do do this? Thanks Elaine. Oh and I'll need another 3 billion dollars. I want to buy some weapons from you. Thanks. Goodbye.

Jerry hangs up the phone

Jerry (to himself) Peace at last.
Jerry listens to something from upstairs
Jerry: Oh those pesky neighbors upstairs and their stereo surround system. I know. I shall cut their wires. It's an invasion of their sovereign territory but it is for the peace of the apartment building! I shall do this at once and not consult my good friends.

Jerry grabs a pair of wire cutters and heads in to the back room.

he should slip Peres a mickey. by the time the guy wakes up the Palestinians will have a state

KingKauff: Uncle Leo as Saudi Arabia?

Israel, Hello!

At least they weren't making out during Schindler's List.

KrispyKritter: self important american actor w/ huge ego wants audience with president, gets treated the way a mere entertainer should be treated. fark him. he's a clown that should STFU and learn his place.

too bad Reagan didn't have enough IQ to know his place, instead of allowing himself to be used and laughed at. stupid, stupid man.

Right, and because of whatever you do for a living, you should not get involved in anything but that subject.