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(The Cambridge Chronicle)   From the state that brought you "911: lost in a corn maze" comes the terrifying sequel: "911: lost in an apple orchard"   (wickedlocal.com) divider line 81
    More: Dumbass, corn maze, Danvers  
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5558 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Oct 2011 at 9:51 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



81 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2011-10-26 06:45:34 PM
Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.
 
2011-10-26 06:48:31 PM

BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.



and google maps out corn mazes now?
 
2011-10-26 06:52:14 PM

cannotsuggestaname: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


and google maps out corn mazes now?


Considering it has a GPS function...

/I guess you're all farking luddites who haven't a clue how Google maps on your phone works (hint: satellite view)
//at the absolute least, you'll know where the fark your location is in proximity to the structures in the general area
 
2011-10-26 07:22:28 PM

BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


How do you know they had a smart phone?
 
2011-10-26 07:29:26 PM
911 is a joke in that town.
 
2011-10-26 07:45:25 PM

BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


I'll be a sad man the day I'm forced into a new phone (I'm on a archaic plan T-Mobile no longer offers, while I would love a smart phone at my current rates I can't even upgrade to ANY phone without having to lose my current pricing structure on multiple lines)

/this freaking RAZR is a soldier, been through hell and back
 
2011-10-26 07:58:05 PM
upload.wikimedia.org

/apropos
 
2011-10-26 07:58:18 PM
How long until someone's Trapped in the Drive-Thru? (new window)
 
2011-10-26 09:02:21 PM
As someone familiar with both Stow and Newton...

They are retaaaded.
 
2011-10-26 09:21:18 PM
City folks (most likely of the ultra-spoiled and ignorant variety - this is Newton, after all) got lost in an orchard? No farkin' way.

\the people in the corn maze were easily more retarded though
\\at least the orchard's a half mile wide on two different sides of the road, though they sitll didn't need to call the farking cops
 
2011-10-26 09:51:39 PM
That headline NEEDS the movie trailer voiceover magic of (the late, great) Don LaFontaine.

"Just when you thought it was safe to enjoy rural sites of interest..."


FirstNationalBastard: How long until someone's Trapped in the Drive-Thru? (new window)

*snert*
 
2011-10-26 09:54:50 PM
If your problem solving abilities can't handle "walk in a straight line until you're out," you deserve to be lost in an orchard.
 
2011-10-26 09:55:24 PM
Methinks intoxicants were involved.
 
2011-10-26 09:56:39 PM
It's an obscure hollow, deep in the underground orchard. You wouldn't know it.

Hipster Farmer for the win.
 
2011-10-26 09:58:21 PM

martissimo: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.

I'll be a sad man the day I'm forced into a new phone (I'm on a archaic plan T-Mobile no longer offers, while I would love a smart phone at my current rates I can't even upgrade to ANY phone without having to lose my current pricing structure on multiple lines)

/this freaking RAZR is a soldier, been through hell and back


Mine's been going strong for over 5 years of rough handling. Those things are built to last. Glad I didn't get suckered into an extended warranty.
 
2011-10-26 09:58:37 PM
I think Fark needs to bring back the "it's not news" slogan.
 
2011-10-26 09:58:45 PM

BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?


I weep for the younger generation. If their plastic toys stop working for whatever reason, they're lost. Toast. Hopeless. Helpless.
 
2011-10-26 10:03:28 PM

Because People in power are Stupid: As someone familiar with both Stow and Newton...

They are retaaaded.


Hey, now. We're not all dumb in Newton.

FriarReb98: City folks (most likely of the ultra-spoiled and ignorant variety - this is Newton, after all) got lost in an orchard? No farkin' way.

\the people in the corn maze were easily more retarded though
\\at least the orchard's a half mile wide on two different sides of the road, though they sitll didn't need to call the farking cops


OH, COME ON! Man. Not all of us in Newton are ultra-spoiled ignorant idiots(but you have to love it when they make the rest of us look bad.)

Also, having been apple picking in Stow, seriously, it's not that hard to find your way back. Especially if you PAY ATTENTION WHERE YOU'RE GOING.

/Masshole.
//Not clueless and stupid.
 
2011-10-26 10:04:53 PM
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2011-10-26 10:05:10 PM

FirstNationalBastard: How long until someone's Trapped in the Drive-Thru? (new window)


"911: Trapped in a cornhole"
?
 
2011-10-26 10:05:45 PM

dofus: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

I weep for the younger generation. If their plastic toys stop working for whatever reason, they're lost. Toast. Hopeless. Helpless.


Depends on how young you're talking. 21 and under, maybe. I'm 28 - I can read a map and have a good sense of direction. Not everyone's f**ked, lol.
 
2011-10-26 10:06:06 PM
Went through a couple corn mazes last weekend at a big farm - they had one called a dark maze which was probably 80' wide x 200' long with square haybales about 4 layers high. They put black tarps over the top of the entire thing - I passed on that one - there regular mazes were devious enough without the pitch black factor...
 
2011-10-26 10:06:19 PM
How do you get lost in an apple orchard? The trunks can't be that close together.... just walk through the branches until escape is possible.
 
2011-10-26 10:07:44 PM

FirstNationalBastard: How long until someone's Trapped in the Drive-Thru? (new window)


I know enough not to click on that link. There's absolutely nothing redeeming about that song, but for some reason when ever it stops I can't bring myself to turn it off. 10 minutes of my life, flushed down the intertubes.
 
zez
2011-10-26 10:09:19 PM
What about being Lost in the supermarket? (new window)
 
2011-10-26 10:11:23 PM
Just eat the apples until daybreak, you can probably find your way home.
 
2011-10-26 10:12:23 PM
To be fair, there are a lot of small towns where the police aren't exactly being taken away from a real crime by responding to this. It probably relieves their boredom.
 
2011-10-26 10:16:01 PM

cowgirl toffee:
"911: Trapped in a cornhole"?


I read the script.
A gut wrenching tale.
 
2011-10-26 10:17:02 PM

JPINFV: FirstNationalBastard: How long until someone's Trapped in the Drive-Thru? (new window)

I know enough not to click on that link. There's absolutely nothing redeeming about that song, but for some reason when ever it stops I can't bring myself to turn it off. 10 minutes of my life, flushed down the intertubes.


I'm a great fan of weird Al's other work, but I never got the point of that song. It appears to be 100 percent filler. Is that the joke?
 
2011-10-26 10:18:50 PM
Sound like a couple of libtards that need the government to constantly hold their hands to me.
 
2011-10-26 10:19:59 PM

RealAmericanHero: If your problem solving abilities can't handle "walk in a straight line until you're out," you deserve to be lost in an orchard.


This a few times over...
 
2011-10-26 10:20:50 PM

Mr. Potatoass: A gut wrenching tale.


tale, or tail? either way, it would be gut wrenching.
 
2011-10-26 10:21:58 PM

RageAgainstMrClean: Sound like a couple of libtards that need the government to constantly hold their hands to me.


NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT POLITICS. What the HELL is it with you people?!? THEY'RE NOT 'LIB-TARDS'. THEY'RE JUST STUPID.
 
2011-10-26 10:22:19 PM
I got lost in an apple orchard once, but I kept walking in one direction and then all of a sudden, I was lost in a pear orchard. So I quickly walked backwards and turned around and it was a different apple orchard. I know it was different, because the moss was on the opposite side of the tree's. I might of been on a different planet too, as the sun was now on my right, instead of on my left. Then I passed out from the excitement and woke up back on planet earth, with lots of people in white clothes probing me for any alien DNA residue.
 
2011-10-26 10:25:02 PM
 
2011-10-26 10:27:12 PM

Asplenium: /this freaking RAZR is a soldier, been through hell and back

Mine's been going strong for over 5 years of rough handling. Those things are built to last. Glad I didn't get suckered into an extended warranty.


I'm still ruing the day I forgot to check my pockets before throwing clothes in the washing machine. I miss that phone.

/oh, the sickening feeling on realizing what that *THUNK* ... *THUNK* sound was after I started the dryer
 
2011-10-26 10:28:12 PM

Mr. Potatoass: cowgirl toffee:
"911: Trapped in a cornhole"?

I read the script.
A gut wrenching tale.


It's a story of when your luck bottoms-out.
 
2011-10-26 10:29:26 PM

Sim Tree: JPINFV: FirstNationalBastard: How long until someone's Trapped in the Drive-Thru? (new window)

I know enough not to click on that link. There's absolutely nothing redeeming about that song, but for some reason when ever it stops I can't bring myself to turn it off. 10 minutes of my life, flushed down the intertubes.

I'm a great fan of weird Al's other work, but I never got the point of that song. It appears to be 100 percent filler. Is that the joke?


It's a parody of the R Kelly song "Trapped In The Closet". That's all I know. Never heard the original.

However, the original is also 10 minutes long.
 
2011-10-26 10:49:05 PM

martissimo: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.

I'll be a sad man the day I'm forced into a new phone (I'm on a archaic plan T-Mobile no longer offers, while I would love a smart phone at my current rates I can't even upgrade to ANY phone without having to lose my current pricing structure on multiple lines)

/this freaking RAZR is a soldier, been through hell and back


Do they even make that anymore?
 
2011-10-26 10:53:12 PM
Help! An apple hit me on the head and I've fallen and can't get up.

Wait a minute... I may have something here...

-Isaac Newton
 
2011-10-26 10:57:56 PM

FiendishFellow05: RageAgainstMrClean: Sound like a couple of libtards that need the government to constantly hold their hands to me.

NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT POLITICS. What the HELL is it with you people?!? THEY'RE NOT 'LIB-TARDS'. THEY'RE JUST STUPID.


You sound all liberaley and stuff.
 
2011-10-26 11:07:49 PM

blondski: How do you get lost in an apple orchard? The trunks can't be that close together.... just walk through the branches until escape is possible.


This.

I mean seriously how retarded do you have to be? You just pick a direction, and go. Especially once it starts getting dark out.. herpadurpderp... walk towards the bright part of the sky...
 
2011-10-26 11:08:01 PM
I think in the long term, the worst thing the Nazis did was to turn popular opinion against eugenics.
 
2011-10-26 11:08:04 PM
Good luck on Cape Cod.
 
2011-10-26 11:11:47 PM
i369.photobucket.com

Was this girl part of the couple?
 
2011-10-26 11:28:46 PM
Laughed my ass off at the title stubby, good job!
 
2011-10-26 11:33:47 PM

BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


You're assuming they have a smart phone.

sseye: To be fair, there are a lot of small towns where the police aren't exactly being taken away from a real crime by responding to this. It probably relieves their boredom.


Note that the police did *NOT* respond, they notified the orchard owner who went looking for them.
 
2011-10-26 11:38:10 PM
I'm thinking that people just don't leave the house much any more. The outside world is a bit of a mystery to them.
 
2011-10-26 11:38:46 PM
Knows the secrets to corn mazes....


/remember where you step into the holes!!!
 
2011-10-26 11:41:13 PM

BunkyBrewman: cannotsuggestaname: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


and google maps out corn mazes now?

Considering it has a GPS function...

/I guess you're all farking luddites who haven't a clue how Google maps on your phone works (hint: satellite view)
//at the absolute least, you'll know where the fark your location is in proximity to the structures in the general area


Cambridgians have smartphones however ironically don't know how to use them for anything constructive.
/hipsters suck
 
2011-10-26 11:53:49 PM
My history of 911 calls:

1991: Woman has seizure, faceplants at restaurant.
1992: Heart attack= The man I called for died.
2008 Friend shatters leg on a steep Santa Cruz mountains hillside.

I've also called the non-emergency police maybe have a dozen times for random things, usually wacky neighbor stuff.
 
2011-10-26 11:56:19 PM

BunkyBrewman: cannotsuggestaname: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


and google maps out corn mazes now?

Considering it has a GPS function...

/I guess you're all farking luddites who haven't a clue how Google maps on your phone works (hint: satellite view)
//at the absolute least, you'll know where the fark your location is in proximity to the structures in the general area


The Google Satellite view of my parent's house still has the car I bought in 1993 (and which my mom had towed clandestinely around, oh, 2002 or so, since she was tired of seeing my dad drive it) in the driveway.

Your method will work extremely well for corn mazes. Much better than, oh, WALKING THROUGH THE EFFING CORN.

As far as apple orchards, I've lost my sense of direction in one before. Worse to worse, you walk one way, eventually hit a path or the end of the orchard, and either follow the path or turn and walk the edge. Not terribly difficult, maybe a touch bit time consuming but were you in a rush while picking apples anyway?
 
2011-10-26 11:59:49 PM

cannotsuggestaname: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


and google maps out corn mazes now?


You're kidding, right? I can't believe anyone could get stuck in a corn maze. Ever wonder why they don't make prison walls out of corn rows? Because you can just walk right through them. It's like magic or something.
 
2011-10-27 12:01:50 AM
Now see, I'd've been too embarrassed to call 911. I mean, I'd've felt bad just tying up the operator's time. Why not just call Information, get the number for the orchard, and contact the owner yourself? That'd've been my course of action, assuming I'd thus far been blindfolded and couldn't retrace my steps / go back the way I came in...
 
2011-10-27 12:19:16 AM

The Southern Dandy: cannotsuggestaname: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


and google maps out corn mazes now?

You're kidding, right? I can't believe anyone could get stuck in a corn maze. Ever wonder why they don't make prison walls out of corn rows? Because you can just walk right through them. It's like magic or something.


Well, save that generally the farms that run these things don't appreciate you damaging the corn walls that make the maze up. But in desperation, I guess you could, yes.
 
2011-10-27 12:22:57 AM
I was at this same orchard a week and a half ago so I am really getting a kick out of these replies.
 
2011-10-27 12:24:02 AM
I've only called 911 twice in my life and both times it was on someone else's recommendation and it turned out to be an idiotic reason.

Once I accidentally locked my keys in my cars while trying to get it unstuck from the snow after a snow plow buried it in on the side of the road. The car was halfway into a one way, single lane street blocking traffick and I was stuck outside with my young son in zeroish degree weather. I called two tow truck companies and they said that due to the storm no one had showed up to work; they'd been working all night. I wasn't sure what to do and a passing mailwoman said I should call 911. I did, and the operator treated me like a total jack ass and told me to call a towing company. I told him I had called two and he said call more. I felt bad but I didn't want someone to not see the car and slam into it because it was blocking the road.

The other time was during a hurricane. The stupid power company said not to call them if I saw a downed power line, but to call 911 and report it instead. I called 911 and got rerouted twice--they didn't even know where my TOWN was, which sort of scared me should I ever actually need their help. I finally got transferred to a local police station the next town over and they said they'd send someone to look at it. It stayed down for four days. Day three someone put an orange sign up on one side of the road that just said "THINK". I got a good laugh at that.
 
2011-10-27 12:45:49 AM

BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


Sorry, Richie Rich. Not everyone has a smartphone.

/Annoyed that I'm having to defend these doofuses.
 
2011-10-27 12:48:47 AM

martissimo: I'll be a sad man the day I'm forced into a new phone (I'm on a archaic plan T-Mobile no longer offers, while I would love a smart phone at my current rates I can't even upgrade to ANY phone without having to lose my current pricing structure on multiple lines)

/this freaking RAZR is a soldier, been through hell and back


Just buy whatever T-Mobile To Go (their prepaid service) phone strikes your fancy, take the SIM card out of your Razr, and put it into the new phone. You're set, same plan.

/If you buy a smartphone, make sure you have the phone's data option set to "WiFi only".
 
2011-10-27 12:49:49 AM

tereklusec: The other time was during a hurricane. The stupid power company said not to call them if I saw a downed power line, but to call 911 and report it instead. I called 911 and got rerouted twice--they didn't even know where my TOWN was, which sort of scared me should I ever actually need their help. I finally got transferred to a local police station the next town over and they said they'd send someone to look at it. It stayed down for four days. Day three someone put an orange sign up on one side of the road that just said "THINK". I got a good laugh at that.


I've encountered more brains than that from 911. She had little problem with my telling her that the problem I was reporting was in another state. She didn't transfer me (apparently not set up for it) but it didn't faze her. I suspect it wasn't exactly unusual for her, there was about a 10 mile stretch with no coverage and then when coverage resumed it was from towers across the state line. (Which was also where the road was headed.)

The only time I've encountered stupidity from 911 was when I called in a case of kids playing with fire. They were burning dried weeds and the like--by their lights they were isolated but a spark could easily have gotten away from them. It was something that warranted a police car, not a fire truck and she kept asking me if there was a fire burning *NOW*.
 
2011-10-27 12:50:53 AM
Q: How far into an apple orchard can you walk?

A: About half way.
 
2011-10-27 12:55:55 AM
Malachi!
 
2011-10-27 01:03:39 AM

FiendishFellow05: The Southern Dandy: cannotsuggestaname: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


and google maps out corn mazes now?

You're kidding, right? I can't believe anyone could get stuck in a corn maze. Ever wonder why they don't make prison walls out of corn rows? Because you can just walk right through them. It's like magic or something.

Well, save that generally the farms that run these things don't appreciate you damaging the corn walls that make the maze up. But in desperation, I guess you could, yes.


Unless you trample it, you're not gonna damage the corn. Just walk between the stalks. How hard is that? Damn, you city folk are sumpin else.
 
2011-10-27 01:10:27 AM
"911, what is your emergency?"
"I'm TRAPPED in an APPLE ORCHARD!!"

"Could you tell me where you are, ma'am?"
"AN APPLE ORCHARD!!"

"OK, mam, I understand that you are trapped in an apple orchard, is that correct?"
"YES!!!"

"OK, please remain calm. Can you tell me what you see in front of you?"
"APPLES!! JUST APPLES!!!"

"OK, ma'am, good. Now what I want you to do is turn around and go the other way, alright?"
"OK, please, please help!"

"I am helping you, ma'am. Now, just keep going and tell me when you STOP seeing apples...."
 
2011-10-27 01:23:35 AM
Quorn maze, easy to navigate.

weblogs.pbspaces.com

See one, turn around and walk the other way.
 
2011-10-27 01:41:19 AM

The Southern Dandy: FiendishFellow05: The Southern Dandy: cannotsuggestaname: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


and google maps out corn mazes now?

You're kidding, right? I can't believe anyone could get stuck in a corn maze. Ever wonder why they don't make prison walls out of corn rows? Because you can just walk right through them. It's like magic or something.

Well, save that generally the farms that run these things don't appreciate you damaging the corn walls that make the maze up. But in desperation, I guess you could, yes.

Unless you trample it, you're not gonna damage the corn. Just walk between the stalks. How hard is that? Damn, you city folk are sumpin else.


Didn't say you couldn't, just said it was frowned upon. Most of us "city folks" don't get lost in f**king corn mazes and apple orchards. ESPECIALLY in this state, with the apple orchards.Them folks just outed themselves as transplants.

LordOfThePings: Quorn maze, easy to navigate.

[weblogs.pbspaces.com image 259x194]

See one, turn around and walk the other way.


You magnificent bastard.

/has a vegan brother, knows the nastiness that is Quorn.
 
2011-10-27 01:48:02 AM

kiyote: My history of 911 calls:

1991: Woman has seizure, faceplants at restaurant.
1992: Heart attack= The man I called for died.
2008 Friend shatters leg on a steep Santa Cruz mountains hillside.

I've also called the non-emergency police maybe have a dozen times for random things, usually wacky neighbor stuff.


Braggart.
 
2011-10-27 02:20:44 AM

RealAmericanHero: If your problem solving abilities can't handle "walk in a straight line until you're out," you deserve to be lost in an orchard.


Miles and miles of This.
 
2011-10-27 02:23:49 AM

Get Lost: I got lost in an apple orchard once, but I kept walking in one direction and then all of a sudden, I was lost in a pear orchard. So I quickly walked backwards and turned around and it was a different apple orchard. I know it was different, because the moss was on the opposite side of the tree's. I might of been on a different planet too, as the sun was now on my right, instead of on my left. Then I passed out from the excitement and woke up back on planet earth, with lots of people in white clothes probing me for any alien DNA residue.


Oh man, if I had a nickel for every time...
 
2011-10-27 02:28:20 AM

tereklusec: I felt bad but I didn't want someone to not see the car and slam into it because it was blocking the road.


Why did you park your car blocking the road in the first place?
 
2011-10-27 03:22:16 AM

JesusJuice: I think in the long term, the worst thing the Nazis did was to turn popular opinion against eugenics.


THANK YOU!
 
2011-10-27 04:31:49 AM

Get Lost: I got lost in an apple orchard once, but I kept walking in one direction and then all of a sudden, I was lost in a pear orchard. So I quickly walked backwards and turned around and it was a different apple orchard. I know it was different, because the moss was on the opposite side of the tree's. I might of been on a different planet too, as the sun was now on my right, instead of on my left. Then I passed out from the excitement and woke up back on planet earth, with lots of people in white clothes probing me for any alien DNA residue.


Sir, I get evaluated on a per-emergency basis.

It sounds like your original emergency- lost in an apple orchard- is now resolved. It's our policy to handle one emergency per call.

So, if you feel being lost in a pear orchard is also an emergency, please hang up and call again and I will be happy to assist with that as well.

Goodbye!
 
2011-10-27 06:07:53 AM

Shocktopus: tereklusec: I felt bad but I didn't want someone to not see the car and slam into it because it was blocking the road.

Why did you park your car blocking the road in the first place?


It got stuck as I was pulling out. I guess that wasn't clear. I was pulling out over a mound of snow that a snow plow had blasted me with and I got stuck halfway. I knew I had the traction(my car's a beast) but not much you can do when the snow compacts under the car enough to lift the wheels off the ground. It was a dumb move, sure, but it was also my very first time driving in snow. I'd grown up in the south and spent four and a half years in Hawaii...
 
2011-10-27 08:09:04 AM
i like how the article keeps referring to the brother and sister as a couple
 
2011-10-27 09:52:37 AM

The Southern Dandy: cannotsuggestaname: BunkyBrewman: Are these the only two people in the world that don't have Google maps installed on their smart phone?

FFS people. If you get lost, just bring up the map.


and google maps out corn mazes now?

You're kidding, right? I can't believe anyone could get stuck in a corn maze. Ever wonder why they don't make prison walls out of corn rows? Because you can just walk right through them. It's like magic or something.



try doing that when the maze itself is 42 acres, and surrounded by 1000 acres of more corn. ;)


anyway, I am not the one that was lost and I just asked a question... fwiw google maps for the worlds largest corn maze is two years out of date, they change the layout every year, so mapping that isn't going to help much.
 
2011-10-27 10:24:49 AM
Smart phones are for dumb people.
 
2011-10-27 12:03:04 PM
At least they're not calling 911 to report a reporter on their lawn (like the mayor of Toronto did) or because the see graffiti (like the mayor of Toronto encouraged people to do).
 
2011-10-27 12:56:43 PM
TFA doesn't mention that the couple that got lost was former 30-year veteran weatherman Mark Rosenthal and his wife Marcia whom he promptly throws under the bus in this other article (new window). Fellow Masshole farkers take not that he still has his mullety goodness.
 
2011-10-27 03:38:23 PM
Wouldn't a corn maze be a maize maze?
 
2011-10-27 10:39:43 PM

superfudge73: Wouldn't a corn maze be a maize maze?


I'm amazed you made such a corny joke.
 
2011-10-27 11:08:17 PM
Can't we just kill them as a public service?

I started feeling this way after the dbag that got lost hiking and called 911 3 times in 2 days.

Not for the same "lostness" but was rescued 3 times in 2 farkin' days. One incident was when he called for help because his canteen water tasted "salty". If I had been around, I would have made him drink from the tap.
 
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