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(Some Cheesehead) Asinine Wisconsin town wants to ban cyclists and pedestrians from using public roads unless they register their travel plans in advance. In other news, there's a place in Wisconsin where people are fit enough to bike or walk   (articles.businessinsider.com) divider line 151
More: Asinine, public roads, Wisconsin  
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9422 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Oct 2011 at 4:09 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»   |    Get this fabulous T-Shirt and impress the methane out of your friends! shirt it!



151 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2011-10-24 01:32:05 PM
Hey now, subby, we're plenty fit. We're just usually too drunk to prove it
 
2011-10-24 01:34:32 PM
static7.businessinsider.com

Something tells me this isn't a picture of the town of Hull.
 
2011-10-24 01:36:46 PM
Man... They sure are dumb out there in that part of Wisconsin.
 
2011-10-24 01:37:32 PM
Since the town lacks its own police force, it would have to pay the county sheriff's department to enforce the law if it were enacted.

Well thought out.
 
2011-10-24 01:39:16 PM
It's because Winsconsinites have roughly the same mass as an airplane, and therefore, fell under the FAA's guidelines.
 
2011-10-24 01:39:55 PM
While it turns out the town of Hull hasn't had a crash involving a bike or pedestrian since 2008, the community's chairman contends that bikers and runners take up too much of the road, leading to a rash of complaints from irritated drivers.

One farking person.

I'm certainly no fan of Teabaggers, but this sort of ego driven legislation that intrudes on your personal life really burns my ass. So you file your plans -- who's assembling all these plans? Who's managing the traffic with that information? Who pays for this unnecessary shiat?
 
2011-10-24 01:44:14 PM
We should all call him up and complain that there's too many cars on the roads.
 
2011-10-24 01:46:39 PM
tallguywithglasseson: Something tells me this isn't a picture of the town of Hull.

Maybe it's the highway to Hull.
 
2011-10-24 01:52:02 PM
BunkoSquad: Maybe it's the highway to Hull.

Ha! Nicely played.
 
2011-10-24 01:56:40 PM
Small-government Republicans, indeed..
 
2011-10-24 02:00:21 PM
Anyone else get the feeling that this is happening is because the chairman was mildly inconvenienced by an inconsiderate biker?
 
2011-10-24 02:06:35 PM
Register travel plans in advance?
 
2011-10-24 02:07:22 PM
BunkoSquad: tallguywithglasseson: Something tells me this isn't a picture of the town of Hull.

Maybe it's the highway to Hull.


bike-helmet suggestion
www.instablogsimages.com
 
2011-10-24 02:08:14 PM
Diogenes: Anyone else get the feeling that this is happening is because the chairman was mildly inconvenienced by an inconsiderate biker?

It certainly reads that way, especially given the utterly asinine idea of registering travel plans in advance.

I mean, really, that's a perfectly cromulent solution.
 
2011-10-24 02:08:17 PM
Diogenes: Anyone else get the feeling that this is happening is because the chairman was mildly inconvenienced by an inconsiderate biker?

Yep. One idiot with too much power.
 
2011-10-24 02:09:30 PM
Diogenes: Anyone else get the feeling that this is happening is because the chairman was mildly inconvenienced by an inconsiderate biker?

Driver pisses you off: "That guy's a dick"
Cyclist pisses you off: "Everyone on bikes is a dick"
 
2011-10-24 02:10:44 PM
Now would be a good time to open up the "Hanging Tyrant" bike shop in Hull, WI.
 
2011-10-24 02:26:43 PM
Vodka Zombie: Man... They sure are dumb out there in that part of Wisconsin.

It's all the cow shiat.
 
2011-10-24 02:40:31 PM
xanadian: Vodka Zombie: Man... They sure are dumb out there in that part of Wisconsin.

It's all the cow shiat.


Depends which Hull this is. From Wiki:

Hull, Wisconsin
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Hull is the name of some places in the U.S. state of Wisconsin:
Hull, Marathon County, Wisconsin, a town
Hull, Portage County, Wisconsin, a town
 
2011-10-24 02:49:34 PM
Diogenes: Anyone else get the feeling that this is happening is because the chairman was mildly inconvenienced was forced to share the road for 30 seconds while passing an inconsiderate a biker?

even more likely
 
2011-10-24 03:05:46 PM
Diogenes: I'm certainly no fan of Teabaggers

The idea of wanting the government to mind its own business and stay out of your day -to-day affairs isn't solely owned by the 'baggers. They just used it to lure people in.
 
2011-10-24 03:08:26 PM
BunkoSquad: tallguywithglasseson: Something tells me this isn't a picture of the town of Hull.

Maybe it's the highway to Hull.


They can always stop and rest. I heard that the road to Hull is lined with wooden benches.
 
2011-10-24 03:28:14 PM
Aarontology: It's because Winsconsinites have roughly the same mass as an airplane, and therefore, fell under the FAA's guidelines.

I must visit this magical land of Wisconsin, to see with mine own eyes, these people who are as big as flying machines.
 
2011-10-24 03:47:30 PM
Can one file one permanent plan for evening dog walking, or a separate form for each trip?
Same question for kids that walk to school.

What about trick-or-treating?

Would every person participating in a marathon each have to each submit a travel plan?

And how far in advance would someone have to file these? Example: I'm outta milk and need to go up the street to the store. Am I out of luck if it is past the deadline? No milk until next week?

/no car
//no DL
 
2011-10-24 03:58:33 PM
i would be willing to bet that for the most part, the sidewalks in this town are almost completely vacant of foot-traffic. maybe it makes sense to have bikers use them as de facto bike lanes. or maybe they could grow up and buy a car.

/doesn't own a car
 
2011-10-24 03:59:38 PM
Dude. University of Wisconsin. I expect this thread to be filled shortly with babe-alicious Badgers
 
2011-10-24 04:02:21 PM
antidisestablishmentarianism: xanadian: Vodka Zombie: Man... They sure are dumb out there in that part of Wisconsin.

It's all the cow shiat.

Depends which Hull this is. From Wiki:

Hull, Wisconsin
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Hull is the name of some places in the U.S. state of Wisconsin:
Hull, Marathon County, Wisconsin, a town
Hull, Portage County, Wisconsin, a town


It's the one in Portage County (new window).
 
2011-10-24 04:03:04 PM
This really isn't surprising as Wisconsin is the only state I've lived in where pedestrians really don't have the right of way. It's on the books but it's never enforced. I once saw a lady in a walker crossing at a walk light get hit by a woman making a right on red. A cop that saw it only asked if the old lady was alright.

Another time the same thing almost happened to me. I asked the horse cop at the intersection why he wasn't going to ticket the driver for not even stopping at the red before making his turn and I was told, "It's your responsibility to look before crossing." "But I had a walk light, don't I have the right of way?" His reply word-for-word, "Technically you do but would you rather be right or run over?"

And last year a young girl was killed crossing the street (in Greenfield, I think) and the driver, although speeding, was not even ticketed. They did build a statue to the girl, so there's that.

But if you, heaven forbid, jaywalk in Milwaukee, you WILL get a ticket.
 
2011-10-24 04:12:48 PM
Let me guess, Kevin Bacon is about to move into that town and a movie will be produced about his struggles.
 
2011-10-24 04:13:23 PM
The answer to this is simple. Inundate the authorities with intricately detailed travel plans. Then see how much time and money is then wasted on reviewing these plans.
 
2011-10-24 04:13:53 PM
Ironic thing is, the guy who was riding a bike on the wrong side of the road in the anecdotal evidence in TFA would be perfectly liable for a ticket, IF he's considered a vehicle required to obey the normal traffic laws.

/rides a bike
//obeys traffic rules
///annoyed with those who don't
 
2011-10-24 04:15:10 PM
If you're like me and have lived in podunk town with a group of little napoleons running it you would not want small town government handling anything more than who they hire for dog catcher. Imagine a guy like this deciding things like healthcare and environmental regulations.
 
2011-10-24 04:15:38 PM
Followup article:

DOT officials give small town politician vicious hose beating.
 
2011-10-24 04:15:57 PM
So you gotta file to go to the liqour store or to the adult store to buy a new ballgag. Car drivers should file too since they share the road and all
 
2011-10-24 04:16:38 PM
unyon: BunkoSquad: tallguywithglasseson: Something tells me this isn't a picture of the town of Hull.

Maybe it's the highway to Hull.

They can always stop and rest. I heard that the road to Hull is lined with wooden benches.



*golf clap*
 
2011-10-24 04:16:50 PM
The only time I can see this apply is when a group of 100 bikers or joggers basically do a race or fun-run, without letting the police know. In other words, holding a surprise parade on a public road.

Funeral homes are considerate enough to get an off-duty cop to escort a procession. The local road-biking club should do the same.

And don't get me started with the Harley riders...
 
2011-10-24 04:17:04 PM
Sounds like the chairman needs to put down his giant spoon.
 
2011-10-24 04:17:06 PM
BunkoSquad: "Everyone on bikes is a dick"

It's funny 'cause it's true.
 
2011-10-24 04:17:19 PM
And people make fun of Alabama...
 
2011-10-24 04:17:21 PM
TheSwizz: Let me guess, Kevin Bacon is about to move into that town and a movie will be produced about his struggles.

Kevin's gotten too big, they hired his non-union Mexican equivalent, Juan Chorizo
 
2011-10-24 04:19:46 PM
Wow, this just sounds like some people sitting around playing a game of who can get a stick up their butt the most.
 
2011-10-24 04:20:39 PM
FTA:
While it turns out the town of Hull hasn't had a crash involving a bike or pedestrian since 2008, the community's chairman contends that bikers and runners take up too much of the road, leading to a rash of complaints from irritated drivers.


So the drivers are no longer interested in sharing, they want all the roads to themselves.
 
2011-10-24 04:21:33 PM
BunkoSquad: Diogenes: Anyone else get the feeling that this is happening is because the chairman was mildly inconvenienced by an inconsiderate biker?

Driver pisses you off: "That guy's a dick"
Cyclist pisses you off: "Everyone on bikes is a dick"


Cyclist rides side by side with buddy, instead of front or behind them, placing themselves unnecessarily in traffic, despite having a perfectly good bike lane x 23: "Everyone on bikes is a dick"

Cyclist runs red light/stop sign x 12: "And they don't give a shiat if they die or injure others"
 
2011-10-24 04:21:56 PM
Headso: If you're like me and have lived in podunk town with a group of little napoleons running it you would not want small town government handling anything more than who they hire for dog catcher. Imagine a guy like this deciding things like healthcare and environmental regulations.

Instead of the geniuses we have doing it now?
 
2011-10-24 04:22:09 PM
In other news, there's a place in Wisconsin where people are fit enough to bike or walk

Maybe the guys at Trek Bicycles will have enough of this nonsense and move out of Wisconsin.
 
2011-10-24 04:22:18 PM
I have no problem with bicyclists as long as they are aware of one simple thing: bicycles are legally vehicles like cars and must observe traffic laws such as riding in lanes, on the right, and stop at stop signs and lights. And they do not have the pedestrians' right-of-way. Bicyclists who do not observe these laws piss me off. Too many kids and amateurs think bicyclists are pedestrians. Then again too many pedestrians are ignorant of which side of the road is the correct side to walk on.
 
2011-10-24 04:22:25 PM
Occupy Hull!
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2011-10-24 04:22:56 PM

If you follow the link to the real story, you read

requires biking, running or walking groups to register their travel plans with the town or bans them from using roads outright
(Emphasis mine)

I think this means if you want to go all Critical Mass on Hull, you need a parade permit. If you want to go ride a bike alone, you're fine.
 
2011-10-24 04:25:25 PM
FrancoFile: The only time I can see this apply is when a group of 100 bikers or joggers basically do a race or fun-run, without letting the police know. In other words, holding a surprise parade on a public road.

Funeral homes are considerate enough to get an off-duty cop to escort a procession. The local road-biking club should do the same.

And don't get me started with the Harley riders...


That appears to be the general idea, from the link within the link. (new window)

A town public safety committee, which examined general safety on town roads this summer, came up with a draft ordinance in September that requires biking, running or walking groups to register their travel plans with the town or bans them from using roads outright.
 
2011-10-24 04:25:57 PM
Came for the pic of fat twins riding scooters, leaving disappointed.
 
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