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(Salon)   The current recession will result in more affairs, an increase in condom purchases, and a lower birth rate   (salon.com) divider line 60
    More: Spiffy, stock market crash, casual sex, recession, evolutionary psychology  
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2011-10-23 01:38:51 PM  
Condoms cost money. A Falcon Punch is free.
 
2011-10-23 03:08:47 PM  
Boo on more cheating, yay for lower birth rate. The last thing this country needs is more mouths to feed.
 
2011-10-23 03:33:01 PM  
Why buy condoms when oral is free?

Come on, people, there are more ways to have sex than just intercourse. Vary what you do at different points and you don't get bored, and you save money and the anxiety of trying to avoid getting caught in an affair.
 
2011-10-23 04:59:26 PM  
I ain't blowing anyone

..not for free
 
2011-10-23 05:00:20 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: Condoms cost money. A Falcon Punch is free.


Having never played SSB, I had to look this term up and now I can't stop laughing at how this scenario plays out in my head.
 
2011-10-23 05:04:48 PM  
Wouldn't it be easy if sex was a commodity that had a listing on an exchange market?
 
2011-10-23 05:06:46 PM  
So it's simply a case of "Wow, this economy really sucks. I might not have a job next week and my wife's tits are sagging. I think I should go over the Craigslist and hook-up with some honeypot."
 
2011-10-23 05:07:56 PM  
This is not spiffy. The morons will continue to breed despite the recession.
 
2011-10-23 05:10:10 PM  

JLEM: This is not spiffy. The morons will continue to breed despite the recession.


One word: Idiocracy. I think that movie is prophetic.
 
2011-10-23 05:11:02 PM  

JackieRabbit: JLEM: This is not spiffy. The morons will continue to breed despite the recession.

One word: Idiocracy. I think that movie is prophetic.


I think it's almost a play-by-play of the present.
 
2011-10-23 05:11:41 PM  
I stopped reading after they attempted to equate an economic downturn to a threat of survival.
 
2011-10-23 05:12:33 PM  

JLEM: This is not spiffy. The morons will continue to breed despite the recession.


Dammit, I just came in here to say that everyone I know is pregnant, and you had to go and preface it with that.
 
2011-10-23 05:12:49 PM  

elffster: I ain't blowing anyone

..not for free


So, the negotiation is only about how many roses?
 
2011-10-23 05:13:48 PM  
But I want to have four kids I can't afford in a world with no room.

Keep your hands off my uterus!
 
2011-10-23 05:15:56 PM  

JLEM: This is not spiffy. The morons will continue to breed despite the recession.


But but it's their right to infringe on their children's rights to have a fair shot at a decent life!
 
2011-10-23 05:16:44 PM  

Delay: elffster: I ain't blowing anyone

..not for free

So, the negotiation is only about how many roses?



Roses? Fark no! Buckets (yes, plural) of chicken and possibly some comic books. And bacon..
 
2011-10-23 05:17:55 PM  

Pumpernickel bread: I stopped reading after they attempted to equate an economic downturn to a threat of survival.


Ecology and economics have some very similar principles in terms of system dynamics and the effects of those dynamics on the system's constituents. There are so many similarities that the Cornell School of Business used to require graduate students in economics to take coursework in ecology from the Biology Department.
 
2011-10-23 05:18:34 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: JLEM: This is not spiffy. The morons will continue to breed despite the recession.

But but it's their right to infringe on their children's rights to have a fair shot at a decent life!


You said but twice.
 
2011-10-23 05:18:36 PM  
Wouldn't the birth rate be lower anyway, since fewer people will choose to have kids?
 
2011-10-23 05:20:57 PM  

elffster:
Roses? Fark no! Buckets (yes, plural) of chicken and possibly some comic books. And bacon..


You sound fat.

/amidoinitrite?
 
2011-10-23 05:21:41 PM  

Soracloud: But I want to have four kids I can't afford in a world with no room.

Keep your hands off my uterus!


Look at it the other way, they could theoretically be legislating that we HAVE to have children - that would make my surgery this past spring a crime.

/no please, take the uterus
//get it out get it out get it out
///because of the blinding pain, you see...
 
2011-10-23 05:22:01 PM  
I'm amazed how people don't seem to get how expensive kids are. Just the "having" of kids can ruin you if you don't have insurance and want to do the whole hospital thing. My friend's wife just got pregnant and now wants to quit her job and I'm just seeing dollar signs all over the place but she's just "the baaaaybeee". Go figure.
 
2011-10-23 05:22:06 PM  
Shouldn't this have been a Romero tag?
 
2011-10-23 05:22:20 PM  

elffster: Delay: elffster: I ain't blowing anyone

..not for free

So, the negotiation is only about how many roses?


Roses? Fark no! Buckets (yes, plural) of chicken and possibly some comic books. And bacon..


Why comic books? Are you on a diet?
 
2011-10-23 05:24:18 PM  
From the Comments

***FilthyHarry***
Saturday, October 22, 2011 at 6:50 pm

Now that I can't afford to keep a mistress I find I'm having sex with my wife more.

***StevenG***
Saturday, October 22, 2011 at 11:30 pm

Actually, I've been banging my wife more, harder, and with better results since the economy crashed. She started dressing like a pron star, and better yet, acting like one. I don't want this recession to end!

***FavMoo***
Sunday, October 23, 2011 at 7:19 am

Not cool at all dude I cant afford my hooker anymore. Disappoint.
 
2011-10-23 05:24:36 PM  
Not a surprise.

Not having read TFA:

--Divorce is expensive. In tight economic times, people tend to stay married rather than divorcing. Hence, more people will fool around on the side rather than doing it "the honest way" and getting divorced first.
--In bad times, especially when bad times drag on the way they have for the last ten years or so, birth rates drop as (1) people can afford fewer kids and (2) people don't see their potential offspring as having a bright future.
 
2011-10-23 05:26:11 PM  
LegacyDL Quote 2011-10-23 05:04:48 PM
Wouldn't it be easy if sex was a commodity that had a listing on an exchange market?



It is a commodity. Sex has become currency where women trade their perceived charms for perceived security. Much like the CDO market, the values are horribly overinflated and thanks to the untapped potential foreign bride market, the American woman's bubble is about to pop.
 
2011-10-23 05:27:38 PM  
LegacyDL:


WTF? I'm still around. Too early for a legacy.
 
2011-10-23 05:28:49 PM  

que.guero: LegacyDL Quote 2011-10-23 05:04:48 PM
Wouldn't it be easy if sex was a commodity that had a listing on an exchange market?


It is a commodity. Sex has become currency where women trade their perceived charms for perceived security. Much like the CDO market, the values are horribly overinflated and thanks to the untapped potential foreign bride market, the American woman's bubble is about to pop.


The most expensive meal you will ever eat is pussy.

I think I read that here on Fark.
 
2011-10-23 05:30:15 PM  

Delay: The My Little Pony Killer: JLEM: This is not spiffy. The morons will continue to breed despite the recession.

But but it's their right to infringe on their children's rights to have a fair shot at a decent life!

You said but twice.


I just really like butts.
 
2011-10-23 05:30:16 PM  

ese_guey: The most expensive meal you will ever eat is pussy.


Not if you do it right.
 
2011-10-23 05:32:49 PM  

The My Little Pony Killer: Delay: The My Little Pony Killer: JLEM: This is not spiffy. The morons will continue to breed despite the recession.

But but it's their right to infringe on their children's rights to have a fair shot at a decent life!

You said but twice.

I just really like butts.


...and you cannot lie?
 
2011-10-23 05:33:21 PM  

ese_guey: The most expensive meal you will ever eat is pussy.


BWA HA HA HA
 
2011-10-23 05:33:33 PM  

vincentpriceisdead: I'm amazed how people don't seem to get how expensive kids are. Just the "having" of kids can ruin you if you don't have insurance and want to do the whole hospital thing. My friend's wife just got pregnant and now wants to quit her job and I'm just seeing dollar signs all over the place but she's just "the baaaaybeee". Go figure.


My sister in law did the same thing. Just got married, no insurance, had a shiatty realtor sell them a crappy house that still need repairs, and less than two months in she decides to get pregnant. I love my nephew, I just wish his mother wasn't so impatient.
 
2011-10-23 05:34:33 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: The My Little Pony Killer: Delay: The My Little Pony Killer: JLEM: This is not spiffy. The morons will continue to breed despite the recession.

But but it's their right to infringe on their children's rights to have a fair shot at a decent life!

You said but twice.

I just really like butts.

...and you cannot lie?


You other Farkers can't deny.
 
2011-10-23 05:36:38 PM  
The current recession will result in more affairs, an increasedecrease in condom purchases, and a lower higher bastard child birth rate

They're putting a too much faith in people.
 
2011-10-23 05:38:54 PM  
May I just be the first to say....

Giggity.

That is all.
 
2011-10-23 05:39:38 PM  
So it appears no one actually read the article and got the point. The point was that we have not good way of knowing for sure what the effect is not sex, whether people are having more, less or the same amount of sex/affairs, because all the research we have is clearly biased, tenuous, or just plain BS.

/Subby's headline is misleading
//You all just keep having your fun in this thread, thouhgh
 
2011-10-23 05:41:53 PM  

DrWhy: So it appears no one actually read the article and got the point. The point was that we have not good way of knowing for sure what the effect is not sex, whether people are having more, less or the same amount of sex/affairs, because all the research we have is clearly biased, tenuous, or just plain BS.

/Subby's headline is misleading
//You all just keep having your fun in this thread, thouhgh


Well....
 
2011-10-23 05:42:47 PM  
Instead of getting hysterical w/ gay people marrying each other. They should reform marriage contracts so that they become like a real estate contract. So, instead of marriage being a lifetime commitment it could become an easier arrangement when both parties decide to separate. Like marriage could be become like "a lease with an option to buy."
 
2011-10-23 05:46:14 PM  

Dialectic: Instead of getting hysterical w/ gay people marrying each other. They should reform marriage contracts so that they become like a real estate contract. So, instead of marriage being a lifetime commitment it could become an easier arrangement when both parties decide to separate. Like marriage could be become like "a lease with an option to buy."


That idea's bad and you should feel bad.

Seriously, marriage IS the option to buy being exercised. What they should do is come down HARD on divorce. That would mean gold diggers? Gone. biatch can't get half no more. Multiple divorcees? GONE. No more spur of the moment gettin' hitched. Gay marriage? Mostly GONE for the same reasons as straight marriage would dry up. Any couple willing to risk a marriage they can't get out of? Hell, gay, straight, undead, or what have you I say let them have it.
 
2011-10-23 05:47:45 PM  

JLEM: This is not spiffy. The morons will continue to breed despite the recession.


most of the crowd I hang with is the remnants of the middle class, with high concentrations of academics and research scientists. Over half the women I am friends with and hang out with often are currently pregnant, excluding those who have already popped out a couple. My wife and I are among the very few in our circles which don't have podling plans.

Those "morons" you so lovingly are referring to are indeed intelligent enough to understand they shouldn't have kids right now. The people who know they can afford to have kids, still are. Sortof the opposite of idiocracy. I mean hell, even deer stop breeding when there isn't enough to eat, and yet they're not intelligent enough to get out of the way 2tons of steel hurling right at them (and will often jump into the path of said mass of steel). Those "morons" you like to look down upon are, despite what you think of them, smarter than a deer.
 
2011-10-23 05:48:56 PM  
I for one look forward to humping our way back to economic recovery.
 
2011-10-23 05:49:57 PM  
I swear I'm pulling out of this thread.
 
2011-10-23 06:00:07 PM  

IamAwake: Those "morons" you so lovingly are referring to are indeed intelligent enough to understand they shouldn't have kids right now. The people who know they can afford to have kids, still are. Sortof the opposite of idiocracy. I mean hell, even deer stop breeding when there isn't enough to eat, and yet they're not intelligent enough to get out of the way 2tons of steel hurling right at them (and will often jump into the path of said mass of steel). Those "morons" you like to look down upon are, despite what you think of them, smarter than a deer.


Didn't mean to strike a nerve.
 
2011-10-23 06:04:31 PM  

Dialectic: Instead of getting hysterical w/ gay people marrying each other. They should reform marriage contracts so that they become like a real estate contract. So, instead of marriage being a lifetime commitment it could become an easier arrangement when both parties decide to separate. Like marriage could be become like "a lease with an option to buy."


Then everyone would decide to get married, a huge "marriage bubble" forms, relationships go underwater/upside-down, banks get involved and sell "fidelity default swaps," ... so begins the "blue-ball recession of 2014", the government organizes huge c*ck and p*ssy bailout program by shipping in millions of spouses from China, who end up owning 95% the country after 2 generations...

....aannnd that metaphor is cashed
 
2011-10-23 06:09:23 PM  

JLEM: Didn't mean to strike a nerve.


Yes you did, that's what trolls exist to do.

Insulting large groups of the population simply because they're different than you doesn't "strike a nerve" with me any differently than if you were insulting people based on their gender or race.
 
2011-10-23 06:14:29 PM  
BTW, I don't wanna read the article. Does it mention this is likely because people can't afford to get a divorce now, so they're having affairs instead of the divorces which otherwise would have happened?
 
2011-10-23 06:18:34 PM  
'Spiffy'?

Subby has a cheating wife fetish, I guess.
 
2011-10-23 06:20:09 PM  

vincentpriceisdead: I'm amazed how people don't seem to get how expensive kids are. Just the "having" of kids can ruin you if you don't have insurance and want to do the whole hospital thing. My friend's wife just got pregnant and now wants to quit her job and I'm just seeing dollar signs all over the place but she's just "the baaaaybeee". Go figure.


women like that are the reason i got snipped.
 
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