copy paste

Please excuse Juan Theo for being a sheephead." Signed: "Epstein's mother's veterinarian

Cool, now Epstein can waste all the Cubs' money on shiatty free agents that everybody knew would suck. The only way he'll succeed with Chicago is if he's able to get the whole team to go on whatever PED regiment that Manny and Ortiz were on. Other than that, Epstein is about as overrated as they come.

So glad he went to Chicago and not my team. I'd hate to be perennial contender and win a couple World Series championships.

Is he a Puerto Rican jew?

Having him managing the Cubs means I will feel a lot less bad for the Cubs when they're eliminated from contention in mid-May.

Why Would I Read the Article: Cool, now Epstein can waste all the Cubs' money on shiatty free agents that everybody knew would suck.

So, maintain the status quo?

Dear Mr. Kotter,

I hope my son Theo can do better with your boys than he did with the Red Sox after they stopped using steroids. Good luck getting a World Series without cheating like they did in 2004.

Signed,
Epstein's Mother

Good luck, Theo. I'd like to see the Cubs win it all within the next four years.

Next stop Chi'town
Theo put the money down
Let her roll
He say, "one more job oughta get it
One last shot 'fore we quit it"

One for the road

Theo, whoa-oh-oh-oh....
He's for the money, he's for the show
Theo's a-waitin' for another go
Theo, whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh....
He said, "one more job oughta get it"
"One last shot, we quit it"
"One more for the road"...

Think he'll try to sign Gabe Kapler?

SilentStrider: If the cubs really wanted a world series, they'd hire Pat Gillick.

As a Jays fan, I love me some Gillick but there are those two tenures in Baltimore and Seattle that don't help your argument.

Just dont insult my mother.

That woman's a saint.

Mr. Potatoass thinks Farkers will get a Boz Scaggs parody.

Good luck with that.

I will hope that the Cubs do less than get run ruled every single game for the rest of eternity, or whenever every Cub fan alive today writes a personal letter of apology to Bartman saying they would have done the EXACT same thing in that circumstance.

It wasn't even the world series. It wasn't even game 7. And it wasn't Bartman's play that let the Marlins score EIGHT.

JosephFinn: Dear Mr. Kotter,

I hope my son Theo can do better with your boys than he did with the Red Sox after they stopped using steroids. Good luck getting a World Series without cheating like they did in 2004.

Signed,
Epstein's Mother

kiwannabee: Good luck with that.

I got it and chuckled mightily.

Why Would I Read the Article: Cool, now Epstein can waste all the Cubs' money on shiatty free agents that everybody knew would suck. The only way he'll succeed with Chicago is if he's able to get the whole team to go on whatever PED regiment that Manny and Ortiz were on. Other than that, Epstein is about as overrated as they come.

yeah, im SURE you were going "LACKEY????? HES A BUM!" when he was the best available free agent pitcher.

you are an ORACLE! Besides, the cubs already wasted all their money on Soriano and Fukudome. None left to waste.

JosephFinn: Dear Mr. Kotter,

I hope my son Theo can do better with your boys than he did with the Red Sox after they stopped using steroids. Good luck getting a World Series without cheating like they did in 2004.

Signed,
Epstein's Mother

[/IMG]

creepy jackalope eye: Think he'll try to sign Gabe Kapler?

*golf clap*

TomD9938: [rlv.zcache.com image 400x400]

Just dont insult my mother.

That woman's a saint.

A saint bernard...

The Red Sox and/or Yankee fan butthurt in this thread is SO SO SWEET

At first Epstein looked like a genius and had huge balls to trade away Garciaparra. People had soured a bit on Nomar, but the guy was still the face of the franchise. Since then his track record was utter crap. Most Red Sox fans acknowledge this. When this move to the Cubs was first announced I think I asked whether or not Dan Duquette would be his opening act to ensure success.

WinoRhino: At first Epstein looked like a genius and had huge balls to trade away Garciaparra. People had soured a bit on Nomar, but the guy was still the face of the franchise. Since then his track record was utter crap. Most Red Sox fans acknowledge this. When this move to the Cubs was first announced I think I asked whether or not Dan Duquette would be his opening act to ensure success.

Jonathan Papelbon, Dustin Pedroia, Jacoby Ellsbury, Clay Buchholz, Daniel Bard. They all suck compared to a broken down Nomaaaah.

I just can't wait for this whole thing to crash and burn, in 4 years Cubs fans will be storming Wrigley Field with protective masks (To block out the urinal cake smell), torches and pitchforks... wanting this man dead.

I bet if you asked Chaz and Trixie who Theo Epstein is they wouldn't be able to tell you.

I sound fat: yeah, im SURE you were going "LACKEY????? HES A BUM!" when he was the best available free agent pitcher.

Does it count if I called him "slightly better than AJ Burnett?" Bear in mind, FIPwise, that's still true.

That asshole Steve Bartman is to blame for this move.

/wish we beat his ass to oblivion back in '03

Scottybobotty: I just can't wait for this whole thing to crash and burn, in 4 years Cubs fans will be storming Wrigley Field with protective masks (To block out the urinal cake smell), torches and pitchforks... wanting this man dead.

I bet if you asked Chaz and Trixie who Theo Epstein is they wouldn't be able to tell you.

Oh come on, you know better than that. Cubs fans will continue to get drunk off their ass and not give a shiat. The next time the Cubs fanbase is outraged with anything having to do with the play on the field will be the first. But if you take their crappy Old Style away from them, they are willing to fight.

LarryDan43: WinoRhino: At first Epstein looked like a genius and had huge balls to trade away Garciaparra. People had soured a bit on Nomar, but the guy was still the face of the franchise. Since then his track record was utter crap. Most Red Sox fans acknowledge this. When this move to the Cubs was first announced I think I asked whether or not Dan Duquette would be his opening act to ensure success.

Jonathan Papelbon, Dustin Pedroia, Jacoby Ellsbury, Clay Buchholz, Daniel Bard. They all suck compared to a broken down Nomaaaah.

C'mon. What about Renteria, Wells, tavarez, clement, lackey, lugo, wheeler, dice-k, et al? Big picture, Epstein has a below average track record.

4NSpy: So glad he went to Chicago and not my team. I'd hate to be perennial contender and win a couple World Series championships.

Let me introduce you to your moronic, sincere cousin, Mr Sarcasm.

Link (new window)

\Now that's some weapons grade, politics tab level derp!

Cheesehead_Dave: TomD9938: [rlv.zcache.com image 400x400]

Just dont insult my mother.

That woman's a saint.

A saint bernard...

Hey-oh

WinoRhino: Renteria, Wells, tavarez, clement, lackey, lugo, wheeler, dice-k

Wait, are you implying that all of those guys were terrible signings?

Tavarez was an average pitcher, exactly what he was expected to be. Clement was pretty dang good...until he got hit in the head. Wheeler got really unlucky this year, and still managed to pull out an average ERA (FIP-wise, he was well above average). Wells is a lot like Wheeler: average ERA, above average FIP.

Renteria was dumb, lugo was dumb...but it doesn't help that the franchise's only SS prospect got traded away in the couple of months Theo was gone. Dice-k was a risk well worth taking, but no one could've expected that he'd completely fail to adjust to the American game.

DeWayne Mann: Dice-k was a risk well worth taking, but no one could've expected that he'd completely fail to adjust to the American game.

If nothing else, the Dice-K signing goaded the Yankees into flushing millions down the toilet known as Kei Igawa.

The Bestest: If nothing else, the Dice-K signing goaded the Yankees into flushing millions down the toilet known as Kei Igawa.

Yeah, that was funny.

Still surprised they haven't tried converting him to a LOOGY. Apparently they've decided Boone Logan is the only lefty reliever they need.

DeWayne Mann: WinoRhino: Renteria, Wells, tavarez, clement, lackey, lugo, wheeler, dice-k

Wait, are you implying that all of those guys were terrible signings?

Tavarez was an average pitcher, exactly what he was expected to be. Clement was pretty dang good...until he got hit in the head. Wheeler got really unlucky this year, and still managed to pull out an average ERA (FIP-wise, he was well above average). Wells is a lot like Wheeler: average ERA, above average FIP.

Renteria was dumb, lugo was dumb...but it doesn't help that the franchise's only SS prospect got traded away in the couple of months Theo was gone. Dice-k was a risk well worth taking, but no one could've expected that he'd completely fail to adjust to the American game.

Excuse all the quoted text, on my phone right now.

I get your points but if you don't like the Hanley Ramirez trade, you don't like that the Sox won in 2007.

Theo wasn't all bad. But he's not anything great either.

WinoRhino: I get your points but if you don't like the Hanley Ramirez trade, you don't like that the Sox won in 2007.

Here's my issue with the trade: The Marlins were desperate to get rid of Lowell. He essentially had negative trade value at the time. If the Marlins want to add a player like that into the deal, why do you give up your best prospect? Especially when that prospect is at a position you've been having trouble filling?

Oh, and, FWIW, Hanley had a higher WAR in 2007 than Lowell + Lugo. The sox would've had a better team, WAR-wise, with Hanley & a random AAAA 3B (maybe Eric Hinske?) than with Lowell & Lugo.

This ignores the Beckett issue, but his salary kept going up. Florida couldn't afford him. He probably would've been cheaper the next offseason. Obviously, I have no way of knowing that for sure...just as you have no way of knowing for sure that the Sox definitely wouldn't have won in 2007 without that trade.

DeWayne Mann: Obviously, I have no way of knowing that for sure...just as you have no way of knowing for sure that the Sox definitely wouldn't have won in 2007 without that trade.

Agreed. Regardless, we'll watch as Theo makes moves to improve the Cubs. If he turns them into an NLCS playoff team in 3-5 years, maybe he was worth it.

WinoRhino: Agreed. Regardless, we'll watch as Theo makes moves to improve the Cubs. If he turns them into an NLCS playoff team in 3-5 years, maybe he was worth it.

3 years will be tough. Soriano still makes $19m in 2014, yet some of the actually good players become FAs that year (like Garza & Soto). 2015 should be doable, though. The only current players scheduled to make more than the minimum in 2015 are Castro, Colvin, Russell, Cashner (all in their 3rd arb year) and Darwin Barney (in his first or second arb year). That gives him plenty of payroll flexibility.

Wouldn't he better as a GM instead of President of the Cubs?

/curious