Don't forget heaving lines. Those are mandatory now too.

FTFA: ($1=$1.01 Canadian)

We extreme parity dollar almost?

I heard they cut out the onboard booze-ups, too. What a shame.

Yeah, air pumps are great on boats. Because sometimes you lose air pressure and it comes in handy to have an air pump.

Maple syrup dispensers for everyone, propellers for some, socialized medicine for no one.

when the Canuks
come floating in
when the Canuks
come floating in
my girl you don't know
won't be in that number
when the Canuks
come floating in.

Upgrades so they can go after canadian pirates?

groppet: Upgrades so they can go after canadian pirates?

"Arrrrrrrrrrrgh, eh, Dougie?"

i expected butthurt canadians in here.

/leaving with a sad

Vows to provide each ship with paddles, patches and air pump

Both of them?

Upgrading because we can afford it. (sorta)

Ha ha rest of the western world.

Andrew Wiggin: i expected butthurt canadians in here.

/leaving with a sad

Nah, we're kicking ass and taking names, too busy at our jobs to be butthurt about tired American jokes.

I know that our airforce is fine

Canada has a warship? (new window)

Considering the economy of the Maritimes, we're all thrilled that money is going to Nova Scotia. Unfortunately, I live in a sister province which would rather argue about bilingualism while it goes bankrupt.

MaritimeGirl: bilingualism

*fap*

nothing like girl on girl bilingual action.

Just Harper pandering to the old war-horses and other assorted jingoistic war-loving types.

But he's NOT LIBERUL, HURR DURR!

unyon: This is step 1. Now if the US would actually recognize our claims in the arctic, that would also be mighty neighbourly.

You have oil and a socialist government. I'm thinking maybe we elect Jeb "Strategic Reserve" Bush and liberate the shiat out of you. If you guys could get some tenuous links to Muslim terror or WMDs it would also help out.

/if we recognize your claims, where do we dump our spent SSN reactors?
//I kid because I love
/we got your back if you have to roll Denmark over this

Same jokes told over and over.GAAAWD!

Absolutely shocked that Quebec didn't get the contracts to build those ships. I think Harper just bought himself a couple seats in BC and Nova Scotia.

unyon: This is step 1. Now if the US would actually recognize our claims in the arctic, that would also be mighty neighbourly.

I agree with this, but it doesn't necessarily have to do with being "neighborly" - on either side.

Canada should be our most important ally and the one we pop a hamstring jumping up to support any time it's called for. Politically, US recognition of Canada's claims would put a the brakes on a lot of expansionism into questionable territory being done by several nations (and by several I mean Russia) which by itself Canada would be unable to challenge from a military perspective. I'm sure a negotiated deal (preferably one that's fair to both parties) could be easily reached over access to whatever natural resources are to be found in these areas if we back Canada (and should be). Regardless of our cultural or ideological differences, we have to live next to each other, so we're best served by being as nice, polite, and accommodating to each other as possible.

The fact that Canadians are, by and large, pretty cool people is a bonus.

American Perception:


Canadian Reality:
Check out Link

ha-ha-guy: You have oil and a socialist government. I'm thinking maybe we elect Jeb "Strategic Reserve" Bush and liberate the shiat out of you

Long answer: Iraqis speak a different language, have a different culture and look different from most Americans and even so America took years and years to pacify the land at a cost of trillions of dollars and thousands of lives. Picture trying to conquer a land in which the locals blend perfectly with the Americans and in a land-mass that is twenty (number pulled out of my ass) times larger than Iraq.

Short answer: WOLVERIIIIIINES!!!

GoldDude: Canadian Reality:
Check out Link

Did you link to a 404 page on purpose or was that just pure luck?

/must be the page for your submarines the Canadians bought off the Brits

You guys do realize that some punks in a zodiac took out a US destroyer, right?

/ Will respect Canada more once they open a decent BBQ. Until then you are a frozen wasteland to me.

Bill_Wick's_Friend: Long answer: Iraqis speak a different language, have a different culture and look different from most Americans and even so America took years and years to pacify the land at a cost of trillions of dollars and thousands of lives. Picture trying to conquer a land in which the locals blend perfectly with the Americans and in a land-mass that is twenty (number pulled out of my ass) times larger than Iraq.

Short answer: WOLVERIIIIIINES!!!

Start a 24/7 curling channel, a 24/7 hockey channel, and pass out free beer (like how Alaskan residents get a cash payment every year. Enjoy the domestic tranquility, aside from the occasional hockey related riot.

The government set up the program to revive Canada's shipbuilding industry while modernizing its Navy and Coast Guard, which are still operating some ships that are a half-century old.

A half century old? Pffft. The United States Navy is still operation a ship that is 214 years old!

Bill_Wick's_Friend: ha-ha-guy: You have oil and a socialist government. I'm thinking maybe we elect Jeb "Strategic Reserve" Bush and liberate the shiat out of you

Long answer: Iraqis speak a different language, have a different culture and look different from most Americans and even so America took years and years to pacify the land at a cost of trillions of dollars and thousands of lives. Picture trying to conquer a land in which the locals blend perfectly with the Americans and in a land-mass that is twenty (number pulled out of my ass) times larger than Iraq.

Short answer: WOLVERIIIIIINES!!!

Blend in? Canadians cannot blend in with Americans, eh.

What's this a boat?

maxheck: You guys do realize that some punks in a zodiac took out a US destroyer, right?

/ Will respect Canada more once they open a decent BBQ. Until then you are a frozen wasteland to me.

But they did not sink it.

There may be something to be said for the concept of "don't be a domineering jerk and maybe you won't need to spend half your GNP on defense."

Mock26: Blend in? Canadians cannot blend in with Americans, eh.

If they gain a little weight, toss on some Green Bay Packers Gear and get one of those cheesehead things, we'd never see them coming, enh!

awfulawful: Canada has a warship? (new window)

Awesome. Satire Wire is back. I always loved that site back in the day.

Each ship will be upgraded with its own Tim Hortons on board?

Thanks, GoldDude

GoldDude: American Perception:
[www.hitjokes.com image 640x403]

Canadian Reality:
Check out Link


404 link. So pretty much the same, eh?

unyon: This is step 1. Now if the US would actually recognize our claims in the arctic, that would also be mighty neighbourly.

^^^^ Very True

also, please stop with the tired and worn out jokes.

ritalinchild 54: please stop with the tired and worn out jokes.

you're on the wrong website, bro

Mr.Man: Same jokes told over and over.GAAAWD!

G'head and make the standard tired comment aboot American beer.

/yes, you do too say "aboot".