At least he didn't run over people with his ATV while drunk.

if only there was a show about beach patrol and hot employees

$90k a year for "beach patrol" duties?

Sign me up.

He probably got dry-docked in the ol' poop deck.

Can't blame the Hoff for hittin' some of that.

90k a year? I hope they were worth it.

"Somebody got some pussy"

Landshark.

there's more filth on FARK than most porn sites. You just wait and see what shows up in this thread
/bookmark

So sharing Sex on the Beach with coworkers is wrong. Duly noted.

/would you believe a fuzzy navel?
//a slippery nipple?

Well, where else is he supposed to dock his boat?

I don't see what the problem is.....
The women were not under age, he was not the direct supervisor and none of the "docking" took place while on the clock.
It looks like the worst thing that happened on the clock is one of the women kissed him 10 times...
Is there a strict no diddling a co-worker policy or something....
Maybe I just miss-read something.

"... agency was earlier rocked by a scandal like this when..."


Rocked by such hard hitting scandals. Can you believe a lifeguard captain would put his penis in two womens vaginas? Holy crap WTG?! Surely not only is he unfit to save drowning people after this incident he should face some jail time.

/anonymous letter fu ked everythinsnitchsounds like a snore snitch
//snitches stitches etc

Good lifeguard. He found the little man in the boat.

See, now I would have played this as some unauthorized docking of the submarine, since the whole phallic image works better with the sub than with your surface vessels. But then I'm just a no-account Fark-lite schmoe with no Internets or anything.

I'll be quiet.

HOFF!!

Huh and those slashies and my android clipboard seem to have found an affinity for each other, or it would appear I have an inordinate amount of hatred for snitches...

FTFA: An internal affairs investigation is also underway into Gittner's.

Into Gittner's what?

/ dry harbour?

Don't have sex on the beach. You might wind up with crabs.

Still would like to know what rules he broke.

$90k a year in a trivial job that black people aren't ever hired for.

This is bullshiat. Let this guy try working at burger king and tell me which job is more difficult.

Skr: So sharing Sex on the Beach with coworkers is wrong. Duly noted.

/would you believe a fuzzy navel?
//a slippery nipple?

Was that wrong? Should I have not done that? I have to plead ignorance here.



Okay, lets start a list.

1) Do not have sex with cleaning lady
2) No sex on the beach with coworkers.
3)

domo_kun_sai: 90k a year? I hope they were worth it.

I expect some farker to find pics of Cara Gittner and Elizabeth Paige Winters so we can determin that.

Spike Lee's Favorite Farker: $90k a year in a trivial job that black people aren't ever hired for.

This is bullshiat. Let this guy try working at burger king and tell me which job is more difficult.

That's because most black people don't float and have little to no grasp on the concept of swimming. Have you ever seen black people at the beach? That's a joke in and of itself, but the few blacks at the beach I've seen always run down into the sand, then run back up all giggly like screaming when the wave laps back up on the shore. Its like children playing. I think it may have something to do with their hair too.

/ some aspects of this post exaggerated for comic effect

i guess this lifeguard took that skit of Jim Carrey as the lifeguard who made out with Will Ferrell as an instructional video.

D_Evans45: Spike Lee's Favorite Farker: $90k a year in a trivial job that black people aren't ever hired for.

This is bullshiat. Let this guy try working at burger king and tell me which job is more difficult.

That's because most black people don't float and have little to no grasp on the concept of swimming. Have you ever seen black people at the beach? That's a joke in and of itself, but the few blacks at the beach I've seen always run down into the sand, then run back up all giggly like screaming when the wave laps back up on the shore. Its like children playing. I think it may have something to do with their hair too.

/ some aspects of this post exaggerated for comic effect

The old small penis white guy coming out of the woodwork to stereotype black people. Surprisingly common on Fark.

lantawa: All the Volusia County Beach Patrol full-time officers are fully cross-trained; sworn police officers and fully licensed paramedics. Still, $90,000 is pretty farkin' generous, and this guy screwed the pooch, as they say.

well, here's your guy, if anyone's interested:
[i466.photobucket.com image 120x160]

The women! How much for the women?!

Sex with lifeguards womens?

I'll be ready.

Spike lees favorite farker

Ah another big mouth black quick to play the race card, I bet you typed that post between cleaning your fried chicken bones and counting the welfare receipts for all 9 Darnells and Shonqueeshas. Don't be so quick to go all Sharpton, Jamal, I like blacks. The ones that don't biatch and moan about unemployment whilst not doing a thing about it, or the twenty something percent of you in jail with five kids with five different hoodrats to support, which is of course impossible for most of you. Most blacks couldn't apply for a job that high up, these newfangled background check things and drug tests keep the black man down though and force them to work at Burger King like you mentioned.

/man the stereotype game is fun
//I can't dance and cant jump uber high either

lantawa: All the Volusia County Beach Patrol full-time officers are fully cross-trained; sworn police officers and fully licensed paramedics. Still, $90,000 is pretty farkin' generous, and this guy screwed the pooch, as they say.

well, here's your guy, if anyone's interested:
[i466.photobucket.com image 120x160]

Since he is supervising all 26 miles of beach, maybe not.

cig-mkr: dr_iacovone: Skr: So sharing Sex on the Beach with coworkers is wrong. Duly noted.

/would you believe a fuzzy navel?
//a slippery nipple?

Was that wrong? Should I have not done that? I have to plead ignorance here.



Okay, lets start a list.

1) Do not have sex with cleaning lady
2) No sex on the beach with coworkers.
3) Wifes best friend

4) Your best friend's wife

cig-mkr: D_Evans45: Spike Lee's Favorite Farker: $90k a year in a trivial job that black people aren't ever hired for.

This is bullshiat. Let this guy try working at burger king and tell me which job is more difficult.

That's because most black people don't float and have little to no grasp on the concept of swimming. Have you ever seen black people at the beach? That's a joke in and of itself, but the few blacks at the beach I've seen always run down into the sand, then run back up all giggly like screaming when the wave laps back up on the shore. Its like children playing. I think it may have something to do with their hair too.

/ some aspects of this post exaggerated for comic effect

You have never been to Virginia Beach have you?

lol. but there they mostly go to ride motorcycles up and down and try to hit on every girl possible

Cig-mkr

No. I have seen plenty of black people swimming. I was just making a post in jest to counter that farkers odd notion.

Freakin Rican: if only there was a show about beach patrol and hot employees

Done in 2

green4mice: there's more filth on FARK than most porn sites. You just wait and see what shows up in this thread
/bookmark

But you're OK with that, amiright?

Mega Steve: Okay, lets start a list.

1) Do not have sex with cleaning lady
2) No sex on the beach with coworkers.
3) Wifes best friend
4) Your best friend's wife

5) Anyone under the legal age of consent

baronvonzipper: green4mice: there's more filth on FARK than most porn sites. You just wait and see what shows up in this thread
/bookmark

But you're OK with that, amiright?

Well, i did bookmark it.....

The Wizard of Frobozz: Mega Steve: Okay, lets start a list.

1) Do not have sex with cleaning lady
2) No sex on the beach with coworkers.
3) Wifes best friend
4) Your best friend's wife

5) Anyone under the legal age of consent

Stop this. Pretty soon there won't be any candidates left.

The Wizard of Frobozz: Mega Steve: Okay, lets start a list.

1) Do not have sex with cleaning lady
2) No sex on the beach with coworkers.
3) Wifes best friend
4) Your best friend's wife

5) Anyone under the legal age of consent

6) Rosie O' Donnell.

Point02GPA: H31N0US: The Wizard of Frobozz: Mega Steve: Okay, lets start a list.

1) Do not have sex with cleaning lady
2) No sex on the beach with coworkers.
3) Wifes best friend
4) Your best friend's wife
5) Anyone under the legal age of consent
6) Rosie O' Donnell.

7] Young secretaries in black dresses.

8) Chicks with dicks.