FARK.com: (6662953) Michael Lohan is thinking what we're all thinking

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		Michael Lohan is thinking what we're all thinking (hollyscoop.com)		97
		More: Obvious, Lindsay Lohan, Celebrity Rehab

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11017 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 21 Oct 2011 at 12:38 AM | Favorite | share:

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97 Comments (+0 »)

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FirstNationalBastard

2011-10-20 09:42:35 PM

"I'd hit it, but I'd double bag it and wouldn't tell anyone"?

MeinRS6

2011-10-20 09:47:01 PM

Mr. Lohan is a mental case. I would trust Lilo before I trusted him.

GAT_00

2011-10-20 09:56:33 PM

They need to put a sober coach with her! A no nonsense sober coach!

So what's stopping you from doing it?

gopher321

2011-10-20 09:57:17 PM

Pot kettle black

SilentStrider

2011-10-20 10:01:27 PM

about what diseases one might get from banging Lindsay, and whether or not it would be worth it?

/probably not.

robmilmel

2011-10-20 10:02:13 PM

"Sort of want?"

Ed Finnerty

2011-10-20 10:21:39 PM

Her stained teeth are simply evidence that she does ATM?

tallguywithglasseson

2011-10-20 11:02:05 PM

He wants to wait until his daughter is even more burned out, and then luck into a drunken, coke-fueled three-way with her and some no-name Hollywood wanna-be starlet?

That sick bastard!

GreenAdder

2011-10-20 11:41:23 PM

"I think so, Brain, but if we didn't have ears, we'd look like weasels."

lasercannon

2011-10-21 12:40:47 AM

She was way hotter when she filmed The Parent Trap?

SnakeMan

2011-10-21 12:47:27 AM

GreenAdder: [i.imgur.com image 275x457]
"I think so, Brain, but if we didn't have ears, we'd look like weasels."

"I think so, Brain, but how are we gonna get a monkey to use dental floss?"

Evil Kirk vs Bad Ash

2011-10-21 12:48:20 AM

No because you're thinking am I thinking what you're thinking.

whither_apophis

2011-10-21 12:49:42 AM

Nice to see Farkers taking the high road and not implying deviant thoughts... oh who am I kidding "If Billy Ray can tag kin so can I"

scottydoesntknow

2011-10-21 12:55:40 AM

Face of Meth

/hehehehe the picture is titled 'lindsay-lohan_morgue'

Irregardless

2011-10-21 12:56:33 AM

Yummy

farkingismybusiness

2011-10-21 12:58:35 AM

I think so Brain, but me and Pippi Longstocking... I mean, what would the children look like?

I think so Brain, but where are we going to find rubber pants our size?

I think so Brain, but where will we find an open tattoo parlor at this time of night?

I think so Brain, but there's already a bug stuck in here from last time.

I think so Brain, but I get all clammy inside the tent.

/narf

Ed Grubermann

2011-10-21 01:01:46 AM

farkingismybusiness: I think so Brain, but me and Pippi Longstocking... I mean, what would the children look like?

I think so Brain, but where are we going to find rubber pants our size?

I think so Brain, but where will we find an open tattoo parlor at this time of night?

I think so Brain, but there's already a bug stuck in here from last time.

I think so Brain, but I get all clammy inside the tent.

/narf

YES!

Sarcastica75

2011-10-21 01:05:54 AM

FTFA: "Michael Lohan just hardcore treaded into "I will cut a b-tch" territory."

Consequences will never be the same?

/zoink!

RoyFokker'sGhost

2011-10-21 01:22:25 AM

I'm thinking Arby's?

/fark you, the Chicken Cordon Bleu sandwiches are fantastic

Sabyen91

2011-10-21 01:23:00 AM

He is thinking he would STILL fark her?

Gosling

2011-10-21 01:32:21 AM

I really do hope Lindsay gets better at some point. But clearly, what she needs is to see the inside of a jail cell, even if only for a short term (not overnight, obviously; more like 90 days would do it). She needs the firsthand knowledge that people are eventually going to stop going 'stop or I'll say stop again'. Right now she thinks she's invincible, that no matter what she does, she'll get off light because she's Lindsay Lohan. You puncture that air of invincibility, that should start her down the path to recovery.

I mean, it straightened Paris out real nicely. Britney seems to finally be getting her head back on her shoulders. Lindsay needs the same thing they got.

Sabyen91

2011-10-21 01:35:48 AM

Mah, maybe she does need to see bars but she hasn't been killing people. She isn't hurting people.

urban.derelict

2011-10-21 01:53:58 AM

You can't dance with the devil and expect to go home with Jesus," says Michael.
lh4.googleusercontent.com

/would tag the ever living sh*t out of that
//before she ODs, i wanna hit that like a motherf*cking train

MurphyMurphy

2011-10-21 02:06:12 AM

So what you're saying is....

It's gonna be a good harvest this year?

Uncle Wiggly

2011-10-21 04:29:17 AM

Ed Grubermann: farkingismybusiness: I think so Brain, but me and Pippi Longstocking... I mean, what would the children look like?
...

/narf

YES!

I'm done. Can't beat that.

Skr

2011-10-21 05:27:53 AM

So her teeth are pretty much dead thanks to the shiat she has been doing and probably unhealthy doses of malnutrition/bulimia. Her teeth have been fixed before and can be fixed again. Getting an oral work over is fairly common in showbiz.

drkam.files.wordpress.com

_{Some have better end results than others though.}

Lindsay really needs to get in touch with reality and actually start maturing. 90 days in the cage sounds like it would be of benefit to her. Otherwise we should start gathering volunteers to give her the Black Snake Moan treatment.

God damn her father is such a creeper. Between him and Jessica & Ashley Simpon's Father... I'm not sure which is worse.

/love it when threads evolve into Pinky & the Brain hijinks.
//Uh, I think so Brain, but this time, you wear the tutu

Clock Spider Jerusalem

2011-10-21 05:50:01 AM

I feel sorry for her.......anyone else wonder if something really bad happened to her to make her so messed up or if she just naturally has a few short circuits in the ol brain?

doczoidberg

2011-10-21 05:57:37 AM

I'm just waiting for this dirtbag to seek stewardship of Lindsay's affairs....
You KNOW that's what he's hoping for.

TravisBickle62

2011-10-21 05:58:18 AM

No father's day card for him

unicron702

2011-10-21 06:12:36 AM

FirstNationalBastard: "I'd hit it, but I'd double bag it and wouldn't tell anyone"?

Oh, I'd tell people, but I'd tell it like this guy would have:

spectrumculture.com

Alphax

2011-10-21 07:08:11 AM

Are her eyes even looking at the same place?

Hit it? Looks like she has been hit by a literal train.

FuturePastNow

2011-10-21 07:18:51 AM

She's doing meth. She had her teeth fixed recently, but there are before pictures somewhere.

182

2011-10-21 07:27:20 AM

lol....she'd chip a tooth on mah cawk.

SharkTrager

2011-10-21 08:27:52 AM

He just wished Michael Lohan were hit by a bus?

Dr. Drew needs to talk to him about his suicidal ideations. They could be a very bad sign for a man in his condition.

Riotboy

2011-10-21 08:40:03 AM

No tellin' where that skank has been.

/I'm sure some of Farkers have major STDs

Sarcastica75

2011-10-21 08:49:57 AM

Clock Spider Jerusalem: I feel sorry for her.......anyone else wonder if something really bad happened to her to make her so messed up or if she just naturally has a few short circuits in the ol brain?

she had a lot of money and pasty 40-year-olds masturbating to her underage self. One day, while walking down the street in a $20,000 summer ensemble featuring daisy duke shorts, a gauzy eggshell-color top that accentuated her braless melons and a pair or Himmie Achoos, she got flicked in the face by the splooge of a single pasty middle-aged man, desperately trying to hold on to his childhood and make up for all the tail in high school he didn't get to stick it in because he was gargling Father Billy's ballsack. But he flicked her once she was past the threshold of immunity. He flicked her when she was already of age. It mutated in her, made her feel invincible but at the same time aging her rapidly, as she desperately tried to forget the sad sight of one derp's penis so much that she literally buried her face in coke and bad DJ vagoo. Like the picture of Dorian Gray, her actual form began decaying, her face wasting away, her teeth yellowing, her breasts beginning to give into the inevitable laws of physics. She became Lohan Zero and it is unknown how her little sister came to be infected, but it has indeed spread already.

Hence began the fall of LaPuta Lohan.

Tell your kids.

It is legend now.

T-Boy

2011-10-21 08:52:49 AM

Riotboy: No tellin' where that skank has been.

/I'm sure some of Farkers have major STDs

Both true. But wouldn't it be something if you could brag that you caught your STDs banging Lindsey Lohan while she was sucking meth smoke from a tin foil pipe?

Persnickety

2011-10-21 08:55:52 AM

Sarcastica75: Clock Spider Jerusalem: I feel sorry for her.......anyone else wonder if something really bad happened to her to make her so messed up or if she just naturally has a few short circuits in the ol brain?

she had a lot of money and pasty 40-year-olds masturbating to her underage self. One day, while walking down the street in a $20,000 summer ensemble featuring daisy duke shorts, a gauzy eggshell-color top that accentuated her braless melons and a pair or Himmie Achoos, she got flicked in the face by the splooge of a single pasty middle-aged man, desperately trying to hold on to his childhood and make up for all the tail in high school he didn't get to stick it in because he was gargling Father Billy's ballsack. But he flicked her once she was past the threshold of immunity. He flicked her when she was already of age. It mutated in her, made her feel invincible but at the same time aging her rapidly, as she desperately tried to forget the sad sight of one derp's penis so much that she literally buried her face in coke and bad DJ vagoo. Like the picture of Dorian Gray, her actual form began decaying, her face wasting away, her teeth yellowing, her breasts beginning to give into the inevitable laws of physics. She became Lohan Zero and it is unknown how her little sister came to be infected, but it has indeed spread already.

Hence began the fall of LaPuta Lohan.

Tell your kids.

It is legend now.

i46.photobucket.com

aspAddict

2011-10-21 09:09:59 AM

Sarcastica75: ...

Tell your kids.

It is legend now.

I read that entire thing in Antonio Banderas' voice.

Elfich

2011-10-21 09:16:49 AM

T-Boy:
But wouldn't it be something if you could brag that you caught your STDs banging Lindsey Lohan while she was sucking meth smoke from a tin foil pipe?

Maybe not. - You've still got whatever has been brewing there.

The My Little Pony Killer

2011-10-21 09:20:58 AM

Great job dad, but you're about 20 years too late with this one. You're better off putting some money aside for her funeral and focusing on keeping your OTHER kid off the rock.

dothemath

2011-10-21 09:26:47 AM

Its a shiat job but Papa Lohan is doing it right.
Without guys like him and their total lack of parenting skills there would be no such thing as getting a blowjob from a girl I only met thirty minutes ago.
That would be the 'Bigfoot' of sexual acts.
Much talked about and little seen.

So thanks Mike, go make some more kids!

Vegemite

2011-10-21 09:27:59 AM

Jeez, she really looks like warmed over death. Perhaps a mandatory 120 days in rehab would fix her instead of letting her out early each time.

DubyaHater

2011-10-21 09:30:10 AM

Sarcastica75

2011-10-21 09:31:13 AM

Persnickety:

[i46.photobucket.com image 315x194]

*bows*

Remember, kids. Don't do drugs. A set of fantastic tits is a terrible thing to waste.

aspAddict: Sarcastica75: ...

Tell your kids.

It is legend now.

I read that entire thing in Antonio Banderas' voice.

I hope he was playing a guitar, too, because that's how it went down in my head.

genepool lifeboat

2011-10-21 10:00:43 AM

Sarcastica75: ...as she desperately tried to forget the sad sight of one derp's penis so much that she literally buried her face in coke and bad DJ vagoo

I couldn't remember why I favorited you so long ago. Thank you for reminding me.

Sarcastica75

2011-10-21 10:10:40 AM

genepool lifeboat: Sarcastica75: ...as she desperately tried to forget the sad sight of one derp's penis so much that she literally buried her face in coke and bad DJ vagoo

I couldn't remember why I favorited you so long ago. Thank you for reminding me.

*tips cap*

thank you kindly, sir.

AcneVulgaris

2011-10-21 10:21:49 AM

Sabyen91: Mah, maybe she does need to see bars but she hasn't been killing people. She isn't hurting people.

And she's making losers the world round feel better about themselves.

nomorelurking

2011-10-21 11:10:45 AM

Sarcastica75....

While I love what you wrote. It was true and lyrical to a certain extent. It still makes me sick. Was that your intent or is that just the flavor of this tale?

Sarcastica75

2011-10-21 11:24:21 AM

nomorelurking: Sarcastica75....

While I love what you wrote. It was true and lyrical to a certain extent. It still makes me sick. Was that your intent or is that just the flavor of this tale?

It's based on a scene from Silence of the Lambs and a true story...
Much of what I write is pretty crude and twisted.
So I guess it was both intent and in Lohan's particular case, flavor.

/I'm days removed from reading a mass amount of dark, twisted comics though, for fun and research, so there's THAT, too. I mean, last night I was watching Cannibal: The Musical... I am fairly certain these things linger in my mind as I write stuff here. :D

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