What is a "'generous standard dose' of medication?"

BravadoGT: Say what you will, but when I had mine they gave me knockout gas, and the next thing I knew, they were waking me up. I was so relaxed it was like I had slept for a week. Never felt a thing!

They gave me Propofol for my colonoscopy. I slept like Michael Jackson!

/Too soon?

Being investigated after she sued an Ottawa Hospital for 3 million (new window)... the plot thickens

Never get a colonoscopy from a doctor who seems tense or has anger-management issues.

tothekor: What is a "'generous standard dose' of medication?"

Enough to help you get over the fact someone's jamming a couple feet of bendy metal someplace where bendy metal is not usually meant to go?

/never had to have a scope done, but it'll happen, eventually
//dinner and a movie first, please, doc

I have waleye. They could fix it but means going through the rectum. And no one's taking that route with me.

The worst part about a colonoscopy is the prep. The procedure itself is nothing.

I actually don't mind at all. I've had 2 so far, both were the best nap I've ever had. And the Dr. is a real joker. He loves to joke he's going to do the colonoscopy first, then follow up with the endoscopy. Funny funny guy.

I´d be really shiaty if that happened to me....

Too bad we no longer have eye-for-an-eye style retribution. That could be fun.

ThisNameSux: The worst part about a colonoscopy is the prep. The procedure itself is nothing.

Actually, the prep wasn't as bad as I'd feared. The nurse told us to mix the GoLytely (should be go like you've never gone before) with Crystal Light lemonade powder and get it super cold. That helps you gulp the stuff down quickly. The other thing is to pay attention to eating lightly the day or two before the procedure, no steaks.

Once you gulp down the GoLytely, you only have to wait about 2.8 micro seconds and you WILL experience what I call an "Assquake" in the 8.0 to 9.0 region of the Richter scale.

The good news is that it doesn't hurt and you are only shiatting out water. As soon as you shiat out all the water, you're done. I thought I'd never get more than two steps away from the shiatter all night, but once I was done. I was done.

The next day when the doctor put both hands on my shoulders is another story.

I woke up during one. I was screaming and flailing my arms everywhere. I could see the nurses attempting to get more sedative in me as I'm yelling "GET IT OUT GET IT OUT!" It was trippy like a dream.. So the doctor comes over after and asked if i remembered waking and I was like yeah. His response was "oooo yeah sorry about that"

/this is how I know I'm not gay
//its just shiatty

cgraves67: Never get a colonoscopy from a doctor who seems tense or has anger-management issues.

haha! superb!! +1 intarwebz

I remember my colonoscopy - only because they couldn't get me any anaesthetic... saw more stars than Hubble.............

realised having gastroscopy the other week that there's only one scope in the room... and they do BOTH ends where I was........

RandomAxe: When they say "Hubble Colonoscope", go get a second opinion on a diet.

FTFY

Tango_down: I woke up during one. I was screaming and flailing my arms everywhere. I could see the nurses attempting to get more sedative in me as I'm yelling "GET IT OUT GET IT OUT!" It was trippy like a dream.. So the doctor comes over after and asked if i remembered waking and I was like yeah. His response was "oooo yeah sorry about that"

/this is how I know I'm not gay
//its just shiatty

My last one (I have Crohn's), I woke up twice. I remember hearing the GI doc ask the nurse anesthetist just what in the fark she was doing standing around while I was trying to climb off the table.

Why yes, this was at the VA hospital ...

This doctor is being raked over the coals by the media here in Ottawa. All kinds of craziness going on with her...

BravadoGT: Say what you will, but when I had mine they gave me knockout gas, and the next thing I knew, they were waking me up. I was so relaxed it was like I had slept for a week. Never felt a thing!

Not even the probing while having a hand on each shoulder?

Devil's Playground: Spanky3woods: Actually, the prep wasn't as bad as I'd feared.

Did you have to drink three quarts of that god awful stuff? Man, I was shiatting water for hours and hours. Thanks for the memories.

My MIL had one last week and she had to drink 135 ounces of the stuff starting at 5 PM and ending by midnight. Her biggest hassle was which flavor packet to dump in the liquid. She was watching TV in my office at home so she could be 3 steps from the dumpah. Poor thing was on it all night.

It was a pain in the ass anyway...but she got it done.

theorellior: Sad thing for me is that my colon is not fazed at all by magnesium citrate. I downed all of the recommended dose, plus extra, and my ass just shrugged. On the scope report the doctor mentioned a "more aggressive laxative" might be beneficial next time.

Good god, I think I lost half my soul after I drank mag citrate. And that was only about a 20 oz bottle.

But it works better, faster and with less hassle than golytely for me, so there's that.

But I'm weird, I kinda like the banana flavored contrast stuff you have to drink for a small bowel follow through.

tothekor: I have waleye. They could fix it but means going through the rectum. And no one's taking that route with me.

I had Rainbow Trout for dinner last night.....yummy!!

Tragic Penile Endoscopy Accident. That's my dream; that's my nightmare.

Hmm "generous standard dose" of medication.
This seems like a sardonic response. The 'standard dose' should be a fixed quantity and tacking on 'generous' just seems to imply that she believed the Standard dose was more than enough (when the patient was actively complaining that it isn't.)

She mentions a frank talk with the patient. She is probably accustomed to getting her way and brow beat the patient into submission. If a doctor starts talking shiat that patient is either going to fight back or cower. Getting probed isn't exactly the best position to mount a defense from.

RodneyToady: "Nightmare Colonoscopy" sounds like it would be a pretty kickass metal song.

I'm gonna see if I can get my new band "Dreamy Colonoscopy" to put it on the playlist for next month's tour.

Mine was dreamy, as far as I can remember. 75mcg Fentanyl. Whoa.

slimfast: The first time I had one of those "up the butt" (my doctor's words) procedures I was ready to enjoy the video of it as it happens but I got so uncomfortable, literally doubling over, that I didn't get to see other than the first few seconds of it. I couldn't wait for it to be over. They seemed surprised that I was in such discomfort. It wasn't pain exactly as it was more of a cramp but it smarted in any event. I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT ONE!

The procedure showed a negative result so I'm thankful for that.

Fluoroscopy? I think those are kind of neat to watch. Except the one time the doc spent an hour rolling me around the table because he couldn't figure out where all the fistulae were. I was on the verge of tears by the end. But if it's less than 30 minutes, I can usually distract myself by geeking out watching the monitor ...

But you do still have the probe thingy, right?

animal900: This doctor is being raked over the coals by the media here in Ottawa. All kinds of craziness going on with her...

You know, some things just make sense. If you're a mailman, dealing with mail all day, the mail never stops. It just keeps coming and coming and coming. There's never a letup, It's relentless. Every day it piles up more and more, but the more you get out, the more it keeps coming. And then the bar code reader breaks. And then it's Publisher's Clearinghouse day. And finally, you go postal.

If you're doing colonoscopies all day, you're looking at ass, and the insides of ass, day in day out, and it's not Scarlett Johansson's ass, but everyday ass, plumber's ass, fat farking smelly ass ass, it's relentless. And sometimes you see piles. And then the anesthesia wears off. And finally, after looking at so much ass, one day, the bottom drops out.

Thanks to my family history, I'm due for my 1st colonoscopy. I'm thinking of going with someone newer to the game.

IXI Jim IXI: Pancoaifo: Good god, I think I lost half my soul after I drank mag citrate. And that was only about a 20 oz bottle.

They put me out for the test, but the prep was a goddamned nightmare for someone who likes to eat as much as I do.

I think the low point was a bit after the mag citrate, when the gatorade was going through my system so quickly, it was still cold at the other end...

TMI TMI!!!!!

In her complaint, Marchand accused Farazli of not providing adequate pain medication during a "rough and painful" colonoscopy. Marchand also complained the doctor didn't stop the procedure when she asked her to.

I bet she will get a sleezy lawyer and use the 'rough colonoscopy' defense.

/Bonus points for the fact that the doctor was female and the patient was male.

I just recall wishing my toilet had a seatbelt -- I thought I was going to launch myself across the room due to the thrust of expelled fecal matter and water.

You don't know what "explosive" diarrhea is until you've done a prep for colonoscopy.

After a while it settles down to what I call "pissing out your arsehole", but imagine it's flowing like a garden hose, and you'll start to appreciate it.

patcarew: Mine was dreamy, as far as I can remember. 75mcg Fentanyl. Whoa.

I don't remember mine at all. One moment I was talking to the nurse about something. The next moment I was being wheeled out, 45 minutes later.

/do I want my 45 minutes back? Hell no, not those 45 minutes
//reminded of Sam Kinison's bit about the gay necrophiliacs

Well, a "rough and painful" colonoscopy sure redefines the Internal Medicine discipline.

I wonder if she was wary of the fact that while the Dr. was performing the procedure she wasn't using any hands.

BravadoGT: Say what you will, but when I had mine they gave me knockout gas, and the next thing I knew, they were waking me up. I was so relaxed it was like I had slept for a week. Never felt a thing!

Yeah, we know.

As opposed to "dreamy colonoscopy"

It all depends on the meds.

I work for a group that does video conferencing. Every winter we set up a connection from a local cancer center to a ski resort where 500 or so doctors are gathered for a conference. Every year they broadcast multiple colonoscopies, endoscopies, etc from the OR to the conference hall so the docs can see new tools, learn new tricks etc. Watching the doc scope a sedated patient vs. conscious one, I can tell you that if you're out cold, this doc is rough. I can't imagine what waking up during one would be like.
At the resort, the docs are eating breakfast duiring the procedure so they can ski in the afternoon...shoveling in bacon and eggs wile watching a camera snake up someone's intestines.