/something is missing from this list ... what is it?

The Hitcher remake's alternate ending had the girl running out of ammo and beating him to death with the shotgun, which was the perfect example of someone going primal and fit perfectly with the idea that, no matter how civilized, we're all animals in the end.

I skipped the long ass intro and got to him wanting the stupid ending to Army of Darkness before closing the page. What a maroon.

If you find it too long, here's the summary:
Instead of the main character living, they should have died at the end.

I have no respect for the opinions of an author that uses the phrase "gorilla warfare".

True Romance? No way. The original ending was far better. If for no other reason than Alabama's monologue at the end was terrible.

Your blog sucks.

1. Put snakes on plane: I skipped the long ass intro and got to him wanting the stupid ending to Army of Darkness before closing the page. What a maroon.

Ash is a screwup and it fits the character. He could have used the earphone the first time listening to Knowby's recording and saved himself a lot of grief.

cgraves67: I have no respect for the opinions of an author that uses the phrase "gorilla warfare".

This.

The alternate ending in Butterfly Effect was much more satisfying than the original.

Jake Havechek: European markets got the original "Army of Darkness" ending, but Universal insisted on a happy ending for the domestic release, hence the S-Mart sequence.

But I swear, when I first saw it on HBO, it had the original ending

I would have preferred that ending had there been a 4th Evil Dead set in a post-apocolyptic England, which I'm sure we can all agree would have been epic.

As it is, the S-Mart ending brings better closure to the series. Not to mention some classic Ash lines.

/come get some
//hail to the king

Lumbar Puncture: If you find it too long, here's the summary:
Instead of the main character living, they should have died at the end.

Which was retarded given the alternate ending for Clerks. The Dante's death ending was totally out of place with the rest of the movie.

Basically, it came off like Kevin Smith trying to do a really lame Spike Lee-style scene to make his movie indy and edgy.

Cutting that ending probably saved the movie and gave him a career.

well i for one dug clerks 2.

/hatersgonnahate.jpg

Glad 28 Days Later is on the list.

gunga galunga: Jake Havechek: European markets got the original "Army of Darkness" ending, but Universal insisted on a happy ending for the domestic release, hence the S-Mart sequence.

But I swear, when I first saw it on HBO, it had the original ending

I would have preferred that ending had there been a 4th Evil Dead set in a post-apocolyptic England, which I'm sure we can all agree would have been epic.

As it is, the S-Mart ending brings better closure to the series. Not to mention some classic Ash lines.

/come get some
//hail to the king

Agreed. The S-Mart ending is better with it only being a trilogy.

List fails without Pretty in Pink, Duckie should had gotten the girl. Then banged the bejeezus out of a 1980's Molly Ringwald.

The AlbinoSaxon: Glad 28 Days Later is on the list.

Yeah, but his reasoning that people shouldn't connect with a character in a horror movie is flawed. People should try to care about a character in a horror movie, otherwise it's just a bunch of assholes getting killed. It makes it hard to be scared when you think the killer might be doing the world a favor.

stoli n coke: Cutting that ending probably saved the movie and gave him a career.

So... another reason why he should have kept that ending.

//I'm the weird freak that thinks Mallrats was his only good movie.

Lumbar Puncture: People should try to care about a character in a horror movie, otherwise it's just a bunch of assholes getting killed.

A horror movie can go either way with this. A huge swath of the horror genre is about retribution. Yeah, the monster is a scary monster, but those punk teenagers totally have it coming. Those are less about being scary and more about the jump-scares and the gore. Real existential horror requires a connection with the character.

DamnYankees: If I Am Legend isn't #1, I'll change the ending of this thread to make it so.

I disagree. Both endings are anchored in the original story. The problem is the motivations. In the original text he hunts the 'vampires' during the day. This doesn't happen in the new movie so he really isn't a legendary creature that stalks the new civilization when they are weak. That is the fulcrum of the story. The old society falls into legend for the new society. Will Smith does not discover the new culture in the alternate ending and does not die to signify the end of the old. The zombies, outside of the pair-bonding in the lab, are still uncivilized and brutish. Neither ending works because of the choices made reinterpreting the story.

DamnYankees: If I Am Legend isn't #1, I'll change the ending of this thread to make it so.

The I Am Legend one drives me crazy.More than anything this drives home to me that American's just cant tolerate endings that don't hold up the idea that 'familiar is good and unfamiliar is bad'.

The 'real' ending is the entire ffkking point of the book.

madgonad: DamnYankees: If I Am Legend isn't #1, I'll change the ending of this thread to make it so.

I disagree. Both endings are anchored in the original story. The problem is the motivations. In the original text he hunts the 'vampires' during the day. This doesn't happen in the new movie so he really isn't a legendary creature that stalks the new civilization when they are weak. That is the fulcrum of the story. The old society falls into legend for the new society. Will Smith does not discover the new culture in the alternate ending and does not die to signify the end of the old. The zombies, outside of the pair-bonding in the lab, are still uncivilized and brutish. Neither ending works because of the choices made reinterpreting the story.

you're right, that movie sucked ass.

Lumbar Puncture: The AlbinoSaxon: Glad 28 Days Later is on the list.

Yeah, but his reasoning that people shouldn't connect with a character in a horror movie is flawed. People should try to care about a character in a horror movie, otherwise it's just a bunch of assholes getting killed. It makes it hard to be scared when you think the killer might be doing the world a favor.

True.

Mugato: I liked the other T2 ending a lot better. For one, it would have precluded the worthless sequels (although from a money making standpoint I could see the argument for the theatrical version). And it gave a definitive resolution. And just to show that I'm not necessarily a fan of happy endings, I liked the Blade Runner director's cut and the other ending to First Blood better.

And I liked the special edition ending of Return of the Jedi better, there, I said it. The larger scope of the celebration fits better with the overall series and yes, the young Anakin ghost makes more sense. than the old guy who never looked like Anakin.

What are you talking about? There was never a special addition edition for the Return of the Jedi. I heard rumors that they are going to make a prequel to star wars though. I hope it is going to be awesome, but I doubt it will ever happen.

Lumbar Puncture: The AlbinoSaxon: Glad 28 Days Later is on the list.

Yeah, but his reasoning that people shouldn't connect with a character in a horror movie is flawed. People should try to care about a character in a horror movie, otherwise it's just a bunch of assholes getting killed. It makes it hard to be scared when you think the killer might be doing the world a favor.

Wait you get scared by horror movies?

t3knomanser: Lumbar Puncture: People should try to care about a character in a horror movie, otherwise it's just a bunch of assholes getting killed.

A horror movie can go either way with this. A huge swath of the horror genre is about retribution. Yeah, the monster is a scary monster, but those punk teenagers totally have it coming. Those are less about being scary and more about the jump-scares and the gore. Real existential horror requires a connection with the character.

I don't disagree, but in the case of 28 Days Later the tone wasn't about jump scares. I don't think it needed the happy ending either, I just think the article writer's reasoning is poor.

Lumbar Puncture: but in the case of 28 Days Later the tone wasn't about jump scares

I'm not saying this applies to 28 Days Later, I was just objecting to your broad statement. A lot of horror films really are just a bunch of assholes getting killed.

Lumbar Puncture: t3knomanser: Lumbar Puncture: People should try to care about a character in a horror movie, otherwise it's just a bunch of assholes getting killed.

A horror movie can go either way with this. A huge swath of the horror genre is about retribution. Yeah, the monster is a scary monster, but those punk teenagers totally have it coming. Those are less about being scary and more about the jump-scares and the gore. Real existential horror requires a connection with the character.

I don't disagree, but in the case of 28 Days Later the tone wasn't about jump scares. I don't think it needed the happy ending either, I just think the article writer's reasoning is poor.

28 days later was almost entirely jump scares (the zombies attacking him at his parents' house? the kid at the burger joint? the zombie soldier appearing in the window at the end before all hell breaks loose?). But that does not conflict with the fact that the characters were supposed to mean something to us and we were supposed to care about their fate.

Rozotorical: Lumbar Puncture: The AlbinoSaxon: Glad 28 Days Later is on the list.

Yeah, but his reasoning that people shouldn't connect with a character in a horror movie is flawed. People should try to care about a character in a horror movie, otherwise it's just a bunch of assholes getting killed. It makes it hard to be scared when you think the killer might be doing the world a favor.

Wait you get scared by horror movies?

Not since I was 10, regardless the intention it to create a feeling of dread and horror, which is hard to do when you don't give a shiat about if the character lives or dies. Your point?

The alt ending to Naughty Nighttime Nurses was much better.

Lt. Cheese Weasel: The alt ending to Naughty Nighttime Nurses was much better.

Is that the ending where I jizz everywhere?

lasercannon: List fails without Pretty in Pink, Duckie should had gotten the girl. Then banged the bejeezus out of a 1980's Molly Ringwald.

I don't think Ducky would have enjoyed it, just sayin I think Ducky may have been happier with Blaine. But he did break out the Otis Redding so the Duckman will always have respect in my book.

madgonad: DamnYankees: If I Am Legend isn't #1, I'll change the ending of this thread to make it so.

I disagree. Both endings are anchored in the original story. The problem is the motivations. In the original text he hunts the 'vampires' during the day. This doesn't happen in the new movie so he really isn't a legendary creature that stalks the new civilization when they are weak. That is the fulcrum of the story. The old society falls into legend for the new society. Will Smith does not discover the new culture in the alternate ending and does not die to signify the end of the old. The zombies, outside of the pair-bonding in the lab, are still uncivilized and brutish. Neither ending works because of the choices made reinterpreting the story.

I was about to argue with you about this but then I realized that I never read the book. Just a graphic novel based on the book when I was 13 or so.
/got to get around to actually reading that book!
//welcome to urf!

The All-Powerful Atheismo: 28 days later was almost entirely jump scares (the zombies attacking him at his parents' house? the kid at the burger joint? the zombie soldier appearing in the window at the end before all hell breaks loose?). But that does not conflict with the fact that the characters were supposed to mean something to us and we were supposed to care about their fate

Blair Witch Project is almost entirely jump scares, 28 Days Later has a lot of post apocalyptic dread going for it.

t3knomanser: Lumbar Puncture: but in the case of 28 Days Later the tone wasn't about jump scares

I'm not saying this applies to 28 Days Later, I was just objecting to your broad statement. A lot of horror films really are just a bunch of assholes getting killed.

And they're about as scary as one of those haunted hay rides. I can't think of a good horror movie where it's just a bunch of unsympathetic assholes getting killed. There are a lot that use jump scares and gore, but no decent one I can think of were all the victims were assholes.

Lumbar Puncture: Blair Witch Project is almost entirely jump scares shiat

Lumbar Puncture: I can't think of a good horror movie where it's just a bunch of unsympathetic assholes getting killed.

I'm not disagreeing, but they do form the backbone of the genre.

In before, "Han didn't shoot first, Han shot. Hurr."

MagSeven:
I was about to argue with you about this but then I realized that I never read the book. Just a graphic novel based on the book when I was 13 or so.
/got to get around to actually reading that book!
//welcome to urf!

It is really only a short story. Good read nonetheless. I suggest reading the some of the other short stories in the book as well. Richard Matheson is one of my favorite authors.

redpanda2: The alternate ending in Butterfly Effect was much more satisfying than the original.

This. I was really expecting this movie to be on the list

I immediately stopped taking this list series after the Clerks 2 bashing. What was wrong with Clerks 2?!

t3knomanser: Lumbar Puncture: I can't think of a good horror movie where it's just a bunch of unsympathetic assholes getting killed.

I'm not disagreeing, but they do form the backbone of the genre.

Well yeah, I wasn't saying that there has to be a sympathetic character in order for it to be defined as a horror movie, only that I think there should be at least one, against the article which states the opposite.