As pirates began to board, the sailors locked themselves in a room called a citadel.



Approves.

/holy shiat, that was Kristen Stewart? Thought it was a boy

Mmmmmm... flashing bacon.

"Picked by a nearby NATO ship". In nautical terms, 'nearby' usually means 'many miles away'.


/on a dark Scottish loch

They make a heck of a sammich.

So the bottle really didn't help at all in the rescue...

SpikeStrip: started singing that to the sopranos theme.

Ha I'm not the only one!!

Incontinent_dog_and_monkey_rodeo: So the bottle really didn't help at all in the rescue...

Do you know how I know you didn't comprehend the article? Knowing the crew was safely locked away meant NATO didn't need to negotiate with the pirates and didn't have to worry about accidentally harming crew members. Anyone moving around the ship was fair game. That makes a huge difference.

"If you don't give us ten million Euros, we'll execute this crew member!"
"We know that's not a crew member."
"Um...."

Started singing that to Peter Frampton.

/I'm old.

There's a little black spot on the sea today,
It's the same old thing as yesterday,
There's some Somali pirates with their guns going 'pop pop',
There's a bottle I'm tossing over if their attack don't stop...

I'm still sold on that old idea of making an "ultimate hunting safari" available on board each vessel and letting the participants shoot as many pirates as they can. The shipping company would make extra money selling spaces aboard the ship, renting the firearms, selling the ammunition and licenses, as well as on board taxidermy service. It's win, win for every one...except the pirates.

♫ uh-oh uh-oh uh-oh uh-oh

uh-oh uh-oh uh-oh uh-oh

uh-oh uh-oh uh-oh uh-oh

uh-oh uh-oh uh-oh uh-oh ♫

/got nothin'

pottie: I'm still sold on that old idea of making an "ultimate hunting safari" available on board each vessel and letting the participants shoot as many pirates as they can. The shipping company would make extra money selling spaces aboard the ship, renting the firearms, selling the ammunition and licenses, as well as on board taxidermy service. It's win, win for every one...except the pirates.

I figured a Russian entrepreneur would have done this by now. Take a large vessel, a tanker or something. Refit it with some basic defenses, secondary hull and such. Then put in several luxury suites, excellent chef and service. Then put in the weapon hardpoints. A couple heavy machine guns, some automatic grenade launches...a lot of soviet era hardware. Maybe a 5 inch gun. All of which can be concealed as cargo on deck. Couple this with a professional crew that can keep an effective lookout and provide a security fail safe if the tourists fark u.

Now you have your "freighter" sail out to the fairly dangerous places and see who takes the bait.

Charge your tourists between $10,000 and $100,000

TheShavingofOccam123:
There was a Sam Cooke song that started with Woke up this morning...

It was up tempo. Can't remember anything more.

..And I got myself a beer..

pottie: I'm still sold on that old idea of making an "ultimate hunting safari" available on board each vessel and letting the participants shoot as many pirates as they can. The shipping company would make extra money selling spaces aboard the ship, renting the firearms, selling the ammunition and licenses, as well as on board taxidermy service. It's win, win for every one...except the pirates.

I'm totally on board with this. A good, honest solution to a problem. It'd be like a canned hunt, but seriously, who cares... they are farking pirates. Someone form a startup company so I can invest.

/good to hang pirates

Psylence: pottie: I'm still sold on that old idea of making an "ultimate hunting safari" available on board each vessel and letting the participants shoot as many pirates as they can. The shipping company would make extra money selling spaces aboard the ship, renting the firearms, selling the ammunition and licenses, as well as on board taxidermy service. It's win, win for every one...except the pirates.

I'm totally on board with this. A good, honest solution to a problem. It'd be like a canned hunt, but seriously, who cares... they are farking pirates. Someone form a startup company so I can invest.

/good to hang pirates


You'd think these shipping companies would have private security (ex-military Blackwater types) armed with RPGs. Maybe even a few gun turrets. When you consider the fact that one cargo ship is carrying millions and millions of dollars worth of stuff, that seems like a relatively small investment.

Here's an idea: equip the freaking "citadels" with radio equipment. And i'm all for ending all of these confrontations in as bloody a manner as possible. Maybe that'll stop the thieving Negros.

They probably woula been able to navigate, but the atmosphere was less then perfect.

As far as arming ships that look like merchants, it looks good until you realize that they'll only be burned once or twice before they start killing crews of merchants preemptively on non- hunting ships. there's been a big upswing of hiring Blackwater types on merchant ships, too.

StreetlightInTheGhetto: Moodybastard: pottie: I'm still sold on that old idea of making an "ultimate hunting safari" available on board each vessel and letting the participants shoot as many pirates as they can. The shipping company would make extra money selling spaces aboard the ship, renting the firearms, selling the ammunition and licenses, as well as on board taxidermy service. It's win, win for every one...except the pirates.

I figured a Russian entrepreneur would have done this by now. Take a large vessel, a tanker or something. Refit it with some basic defenses, secondary hull and such. Then put in several luxury suites, excellent chef and service. Then put in the weapon hardpoints. A couple heavy machine guns, some automatic grenade launches...a lot of soviet era hardware. Maybe a 5 inch gun. All of which can be concealed as cargo on deck. Couple this with a professional crew that can keep an effective lookout and provide a security fail safe if the tourists fark u.

Now you have your "freighter" sail out to the fairly dangerous places and see who takes the bait.

Charge your tourists between $10,000 and $100,000

Hunting humans for sport.. PIRATES SUCK so let's sink even FURTHER into depravity than they already are! Even though we, unlike the pirates, come from functioning countries! And have money to spare to play judge, jury, and executioner! Brilliant!

*pssst...these are the jokes*

SuperTramp [TotalFark] Quote 2011-10-15 08:36:51 PM
vestona22
Started singing that to Peter Frampton.

/I'm old.

I saw where you came from,
called out your name (vestona!)
but there's no answer
we lived on your doorstep
I made you my wife but I don't need that.

/old, too

+1
one of my very favourites off of "Comes Alive". what an underrated/overlooked song.

Meh... citadel. THIS is our citadel!



/LA area native

mainsail: As far as arming ships that look like merchants, it looks good until you realize that they'll only be burned once or twice before they start killing crews of merchants preemptively on non- hunting ships. there's been a big upswing of hiring Blackwater types on merchant ships, too.

International shipping laws do not take kindly to bringing heavy weapons into port. A merchant ship arriving in a US port with automatic weapons and RPGs would be in a LOT of trouble. Customs, for example, has a hard time keeping this stuff from leaving the port in somebody's trunk. In some countries, you could hide an entire invasion force as the armed crew of a dozen ships arriving coincidentally at the same time. So, letting armed ships into port is generally viewed as a bad idea, generally regarded as a hostile act.

You're either supposed to be a military naval vessel, OR a merchant ship.

Moodybastard: Now you have your "freighter" sail out to the fairly dangerous places and see who takes the bait.

Sounds like a Q-Ship. They didn't do spectacularly well against U-Boats, but I've said for quite a while that an updated Q-Ship is just the ticket to deal with the Somali pirate issue.

innovate

lol no

StreetlightInTheGhetto: pottie: StreetlightInTheGhetto: Moodybastard: pottie: I'm still sold on that old idea of making an "ultimate hunting safari" available on board each vessel and letting the participants shoot as many pirates as they can. The shipping company would make extra money selling spaces aboard the ship, renting the firearms, selling the ammunition and licenses, as well as on board taxidermy service. It's win, win for every one...except the pirates.

I figured a Russian entrepreneur would have done this by now. Take a large vessel, a tanker or something. Refit it with some basic defenses, secondary hull and such. Then put in several luxury suites, excellent chef and service. Then put in the weapon hardpoints. A couple heavy machine guns, some automatic grenade launches...a lot of soviet era hardware. Maybe a 5 inch gun. All of which can be concealed as cargo on deck. Couple this with a professional crew that can keep an effective lookout and provide a security fail safe if the tourists fark u.

Now you have your "freighter" sail out to the fairly dangerous places and see who takes the bait.

Charge your tourists between $10,000 and $100,000

Hunting humans for sport.. PIRATES SUCK so let's sink even FURTHER into depravity than they already are! Even though we, unlike the pirates, come from functioning countries! And have money to spare to play judge, jury, and executioner! Brilliant!

*pssst...these are the jokes*

No, they're twisted fantasy thought exercises that still leave a bitter effing taste in my mouth. See also: glass parking lot.

/and before anyone pulls 'Welcome to Fark' crap, click my profile and add two years of lurking
// the radio equipment in the Citadel is a great idea, and these sailors do, indeed, rock

No, this is speculation on what someone with a great deal of wealth and a lack of compassion for human life might do to amuse themselves. In this example I am using the stereotypical Russian billionaire for my evil foil.
I could easily use the Somali businessman that has established a stock market where one can invest in a pirate group for a cut of future returns.

clyph: Moodybastard: Now you have your "freighter" sail out to the fairly dangerous places and see who takes the bait.

Sounds like a Q-Ship. They didn't do spectacularly well against U-Boats, but I've said for quite a while that an updated Q-Ship is just the ticket to deal with the Somali pirate issue.

That was my thought but wasn't sure how many people would know what a Q Ship is

Q cars are more fun. :)

/bye bye now.