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(CNN)   I have a fried egg on my forehead; your creationist argument is invalid   (thechart.blogs.cnn.com) divider line 291
    More: Strange, human skeleton, graduate studies, field research, common ancestor, family trees, regions of Africa  
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18791 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Sep 2011 at 5:48 PM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2011-09-12 02:50:08 PM  
it's really depressing that 40 percent of americans believe in creationism.
 
2011-09-12 02:58:29 PM  
Wallowing in ignorance is our God-given right as an American.
 
2011-09-12 03:08:56 PM  
Whoever came up with the idea of giving equal time to contrary opinions should be shot in the face. Creationism is the best example of the hazards of giving stupid people the mic, and like karaoke, it's really only fun if you're hammered out of your skull and the person making an ass out themselves winds up crying in the bathroom.
 
2011-09-12 03:15:36 PM  

Vodka Zombie: Whoever came up with the idea of giving equal time to contrary opinions should be shot in the face.


this is the fundamental problem with the relatively new media concept of "balance." you can blame the advent of fox news directly for this. prior to 1996, the mainstream media wouldn't have given creationists (or the tea party, or birthers) the time of day. now then report their insanity verbatim and unchallenged, all in the name of "balance." well, as daniel patrick moynihan said, "you are entitled to your own opinions, but you are not entitled to your own facts."
 
2011-09-12 03:35:04 PM  
You could have an entire farm jutting from your urethra and any creationist argument would still be invalid.

=|
 
2011-09-12 03:41:34 PM  

FlashHarry: it's really depressing that 40 percent of americans believe in creationism.


It's really depressing that 150 years after Darwin we're still having to have this discussion.
 
2011-09-12 03:41:39 PM  

Vodka Zombie: Whoever came up with the idea of giving equal time to contrary opinions should be shot in the face. Creationism is the best example of the hazards of giving stupid people the mic, and like karaoke, it's really only fun if you're hammered out of your skull and the person making an ass out themselves winds up crying in the bathroom.


Definitely. Dara O'Briaian says it better than I could.

Get in the farking sack. (new window)
 
2011-09-12 03:52:19 PM  

Vodka Zombie: Whoever came up with the idea of giving equal time to contrary opinions should be shot in the face.


Exactly.

The whole point of the power of a marketplace of ideas is TO GET RID OF THE INFINITE NUMBER OF FAILED IDEAS THAT CAN BE PULLED FROM BILLIONS OF ASSES. An opinion that isn't subject to rational scrutiny and dispensation is worthless.
 
2011-09-12 04:42:42 PM  
Creationism isn't an argument, it's a mental condition brought on by ignorance and indoctrination.
 
2011-09-12 04:46:41 PM  
I wrote this for a redlit article a few days ago. Took a while, so I figured I'd get some more use out of it.

Rocks are not ducks, no matter how much you want them to be.

Hear me out on this one. Let us say that one day you're walking along on a bit of a hike, and you trip over something. You look down and pick up a fist-sized rock. Being a bit of an amateur geologist, you're intrigued by the texture and weight, and decide that you're holding a big piece of granite. "Look,", you say to nobody in particular, "what a cool piece of granite!".

"Nope!", says a voice behind you, startling you. As you turn, you realize it's a friend of yours. Why he's out here in the field you're not sure, but you keep your composure and respond, "Yes, it's a dense igneous stone with a fine texture. Looks like granite to me."
Your friend replies, "No, it's a duck." You're perplexed, but you calmly point out that it has neither feathers nor a beak, nor is it by any ready means of analysis alive. It is in fact a rock, from the igneous family, and it appears to be granite.
Your friend insists it's a duck, because he read it in a book.
You realize that this conversation is going nowhere, so you take your rock, excuse yourself, and head for home. When you get there, you pull out your Big Book Of Rocks, and you realize that, as you compare the neat pictures to your rock, you've made an error. It's not granite, it's rhyolite. Pleased with your new knowledge, you clean the thing off and as you put it on a shelf next to your Boxee Box and that Beanie Baby you thought would be valuable some day (hey, we all make investment errors), the doorbell rings. You answer it, and it's your friend, now dressed nattily in a white shirt and tie, dark pants, and carrying some sort of pamphlet. Without benefit of small talk, he blurts out "See, it's a duck".
"No, it's rhyolite," you respond, "I didn't realize it had that much quartz in it until I got home. When I took a closer look, I realized it wasn't granite".
"You were wrong about it being granite, so it's obviously a duck. Do you want one of these?" he says, proffering you a pamphlet that appears to say something about the creation of ducks. You refuse the copy of The Ducktower, close the door, and go back to your interesting rock.

Some months later, you happen to be entertaining some folk from the nearby university. One of them is a well-known geologist, and she seems to be taking special interest in your rock. You ask her what she thinks of your rhyolite.
"Oh, that's not rhyolite," she says, "in fact, I can't remember seeing a specimen like that before. Do you mind if I take it and run a couple of tests on it? I promise I won't sample too much of it." You agree, and she vanishes out your door, heading for her lab. A couple of days later, she sends you an email saying "You've found a new type of mineral! This is really quite a discovery. You get naming rights, as long as you don't call it 'UFIAnite' or 'Farkelium' or something stupid like that". As you read the words with growing elation, you hear a knock at your door. Maybe she brought your rock back? Quickly, you mentally strain to come up with a good new-mineral-sounding name but you can't come up with anything better than "lovezombium" by the time you get to the door. You open it...and it's your friend again. "See! I TOLD you it was a duck!" he blurts.
You count to ten. In Sanskrit. Backwards. Then you slowly and calmly try to explain what the geologist told you. He shakes his head emphatically.
"No, you were wrong each time you said what it was. So obviously I'm right, and it's a duck."
"Um, I learned more about it, and each time I obtained more knowledge, what I knew about it changed. That doesn't make it a duck."
"Yes it does. My book has said ALL ALONG that it's a duck. My facts haven't changed, and yours have changed all the time. So mine are obviously more correct. It's a duck."

You give him a firm shove out the door, and slam it with some satisfaction. He goes on to be the Republican frontrunner in the next election.

Science changes as we learn. Religion refuses to change no matter what we learn.

And rocks are not, in fact, ducks.
 
2011-09-12 05:27:05 PM  
Haha, these "scientist" always put some wildest number tugs on whatever pieces they find and people believe it. Bankers and politicians are more honest than these people. I'd rather believe humankind was dropped off to an animal planet - Planet Earth - several thousand years ago from a a spaceship with erased the memories of the space travel. Why aren't there any creatures that are in mid-ways between humans and animals? Why does mankind alone handle language perfectly while all other living things don't, each existing with distinct DNA? Macro evolution(crossing species) never happened.

Evolutionary theory is a myth, an act of faith. God made man and they are still man, God made apes and guess what? They are still apes. There are no man-apes walking around to prove anything else, that is if you are interested in the scientific model of proof and verifiable fact.


From now on I'm just going to cut and paste my trolling from the comments of the link.
 
2011-09-12 05:41:03 PM  

FlashHarry: it's really depressing that 40 percent of americans believe in creationism.


Isn't it weird how close that number is to the percentage of Americans that always, ALWAYS, ALWAYS vote GOP?
 
2011-09-12 05:43:55 PM  
imgs.xkcd.com
oblig\
 
2011-09-12 05:53:47 PM  
There's a creationist "argument"? How come creationists have never used it?
 
2011-09-12 05:53:55 PM  

dahmers love zombie: I wrote this for a redlit article a few days ago. Took a while, so I figured I'd get some more use out of it.

Rocks are not ducks, no matter how much you want them to be.

Hear me out on this one. Let us say that one day you're walking along on a bit of a hike, and you trip over something. You look down and pick up a fist-sized rock. Being a bit of an amateur geologist, you're intrigued by the texture and weight, and decide that you're holding a big piece of granite. "Look,", you say to nobody in particular, "what a cool piece of granite!".

"Nope!", says a voice behind you, startling you. As you turn, you realize it's a friend of yours. Why he's out here in the field you're not sure, but you keep your composure and respond, "Yes, it's a dense igneous stone with a fine texture. Looks like granite to me."
Your friend replies, "No, it's a duck." You're perplexed, but you calmly point out that it has neither feathers nor a beak, nor is it by any ready means of analysis alive. It is in fact a rock, from the igneous family, and it appears to be granite.
Your friend insists it's a duck, because he read it in a book.
You realize that this conversation is going nowhere, so you take your rock, excuse yourself, and head for home. When you get there, you pull out your Big Book Of Rocks, and you realize that, as you compare the neat pictures to your rock, you've made an error. It's not granite, it's rhyolite. Pleased with your new knowledge, you clean the thing off and as you put it on a shelf next to your Boxee Box and that Beanie Baby you thought would be valuable some day (hey, we all make investment errors), the doorbell rings. You answer it, and it's your friend, now dressed nattily in a white shirt and tie, dark pants, and carrying some sort of pamphlet. Without benefit of small talk, he blurts out "See, it's a duck".
"No, it's rhyolite," you respond, "I didn't realize it had that much quartz in it until I got home. When I took a closer look, I realized it wasn't granite".
"You were wrong about it being granite, so it's obviously a duck. Do you want one of these?" he says, proffering you a pamphlet that appears to say something about the creation of ducks. You refuse the copy of The Ducktower, close the door, and go back to your interesting rock.

Some months later, you happen to be entertaining some folk from the nearby university. One of them is a well-known geologist, and she seems to be taking special interest in your rock. You ask her what she thinks of your rhyolite.
"Oh, that's not rhyolite," she says, "in fact, I can't remember seeing a specimen like that before. Do you mind if I take it and run a couple of tests on it? I promise I won't sample too much of it." You agree, and she vanishes out your door, heading for her lab. A couple of days later, she sends you an email saying "You've found a new type of mineral! This is really quite a discovery. You get naming rights, as long as you don't call it 'UFIAnite' or 'Farkelium' or something stupid like that". As you read the words with growing elation, you hear a knock at your door. Maybe she brought your rock back? Quickly, you mentally strain to come up with a good new-mineral-sounding name but you can't come up with anything better than "lovezombium" by the time you get to the door. You open it...and it's your friend again. "See! I TOLD you it was a duck!" he blurts.
You count to ten. In Sanskrit. Backwards. Then you slowly and calmly try to explain what the geologist told you. He shakes his head emphatically.
"No, you were wrong each time you said what it was. So obviously I'm right, and it's a duck."
"Um, I learned more about it, and each time I obtained more knowledge, what I knew about it changed. That doesn't make it a duck."
"Yes it does. My book has said ALL ALONG that it's a duck. My facts haven't changed, and yours have changed all the time. So mine are obviously more correct. It's a duck."

You give him a firm shove out the door, and slam it with some satisfaction. He goes on to be the Republican frontrunner in the next election.

Science changes as we learn. ...


Remind me never to take you for granite.
 
2011-09-12 05:54:16 PM  
"There are holes in our knowledge"
"We don't know enough to make an informed opinion"

Notice how similar the anti-Evolution and anti-Human Global warming attacks are so similar. (also most of them are the same people)
 
2011-09-12 05:55:24 PM  
In before Bevets
 
2011-09-12 05:55:41 PM  

Marcus Aurelius: Creationism isn't an argument, it's a mental condition brought on by ignorance and indoctrination.



I'm looking around to find a This that's big enough...
 
2011-09-12 05:56:25 PM  
A fried egg? What the? Let me watch the...OMFG WHAT IS THAT?
 
2011-09-12 06:00:09 PM  

luckyeddie: In before Bevets


Son of a... at least misspell his name so he doesn't get an email notification of this thread!
 
2011-09-12 06:00:16 PM  

dahmers love zombie: I wrote this for a redlit article a few days ago. Took a while, so I figured I'd get some more use out of it.

Rocks are not ducks, no matter how much you want them to be.

Hear me out on this one. Let us say that one day you're walking along on a bit of a hike, and you trip over something. You look down and pick up a fist-sized rock. Being a bit of an amateur geologist, you're intrigued by the texture and weight, and decide that you're holding a big piece of granite. "Look,", you say to nobody in particular, "what a cool piece of granite!".

"Nope!", says a voice behind you, startling you. As you turn, you realize it's a friend of yours. Why he's out here in the field you're not sure, but you keep your composure and respond, "Yes, it's a dense igneous stone with a fine texture. Looks like granite to me."
Your friend replies, "No, it's a duck." You're perplexed, but you calmly point out that it has neither feathers nor a beak, nor is it by any ready means of analysis alive. It is in fact a rock, from the igneous family, and it appears to be granite.
Your friend insists it's a duck, because he read it in a book.
You realize that this conversation is going nowhere, so you take your rock, excuse yourself, and head for home. When you get there, you pull out your Big Book Of Rocks, and you realize that, as you compare the neat pictures to your rock, you've made an error. It's not granite, it's rhyolite. Pleased with your new knowledge, you clean the thing off and as you put it on a shelf next to your Boxee Box and that Beanie Baby you thought would be valuable some day (hey, we all make investment errors), the doorbell rings. You answer it, and it's your friend, now dressed nattily in a white shirt and tie, dark pants, and carrying some sort of pamphlet. Without benefit of small talk, he blurts out "See, it's a duck".
"No, it's rhyolite," you respond, "I didn't realize it had that much quartz in it until I got home. When I took a closer look, I realized it wasn't granite".
"You were wrong about it being granite, so it's obviously a duck. Do you want one of these?" he says, proffering you a pamphlet that appears to say something about the creation of ducks. You refuse the copy of The Ducktower, close the door, and go back to your interesting rock.

Some months later, you happen to be entertaining some folk from the nearby university. One of them is a well-known geologist, and she seems to be taking special interest in your rock. You ask her what she thinks of your rhyolite.
"Oh, that's not rhyolite," she says, "in fact, I can't remember seeing a specimen like that before. Do you mind if I take it and run a couple of tests on it? I promise I won't sample too much of it." You agree, and she vanishes out your door, heading for her lab. A couple of days later, she sends you an email saying "You've found a new type of mineral! This is really quite a discovery. You get naming rights, as long as you don't call it 'UFIAnite' or 'Farkelium' or something stupid like that". As you read the words with growing elation, you hear a knock at your door. Maybe she brought your rock back? Quickly, you mentally strain to come up with a good new-mineral-sounding name but you can't come up with anything better than "lovezombium" by the time you get to the door. You open it...and it's your friend again. "See! I TOLD you it was a duck!" he blurts.
You count to ten. In Sanskrit. Backwards. Then you slowly and calmly try to explain what the geologist told you. He shakes his head emphatically.
"No, you were wrong each time you said what it was. So obviously I'm right, and it's a duck."
"Um, I learned more about it, and each time I obtained more knowledge, what I knew about it changed. That doesn't make it a duck."
"Yes it does. My book has said ALL ALONG that it's a duck. My facts haven't changed, and yours have changed all the time. So mine are obviously more correct. It's a duck."

You give him a firm shove out the door, and slam it with some satisfaction. He goes on to be the Republican frontrunner in the next election.

Science changes as we learn. ...


A million and one times THIS

/Next time I find a rock I'm gonna call it a duck
 
2011-09-12 06:01:02 PM  
dahmers love zombie:

That was beautiful.
 
2011-09-12 06:02:02 PM  

The Onion is prophetic: luckyeddie: In before Bevets

Son of a... at least misspell his name so he doesn't get an email notification of this thread!


lol
 
2011-09-12 06:02:32 PM  

luckyeddie: In before Bevets


Great. You've summoned him. And just when we had a decent number of intelligent, original, non-copy-pastaed comments.

Now he'll pop up with his quotes that prove nothing, yet he will stand there like a kid after taking his first shiat on a toilet, proud as can be but ignoring his unwiped arse.
 
2011-09-12 06:03:34 PM  
Fried eggs are the tinfoil Australopithecus afarensis use to keep reason out of their frontal cortexes.

/or something. I dunno. Whatever.
 
2011-09-12 06:03:51 PM  

FlashHarry: it's really depressing that 40 percent of americans believe in creationism.


It's more sad that 60% of Americans don't think people deserve their right to have their own opinion.
 
2011-09-12 06:04:33 PM  

rufus-t-firefly: luckyeddie: In before Bevets

Great. You've summoned him. And just when we had a decent number of intelligent, original, non-copy-pastaed comments.

Now he'll pop up with his quotes that prove nothing, yet he will stand there like a kid after taking his first shiat on a toilet, proud as can be but ignoring his unwiped arse.


Yes, but we're having Peking Rock in hoisin sauce tonight, so I thought I'd invite him to dinner.
 
2011-09-12 06:05:27 PM  

TedNigma: FlashHarry: it's really depressing that 40 percent of americans believe in creationism.

It's more sad that 60% of Americans don't think people deserve their right to have their own opinion.


Opinion, sure. Right to teach that opinion as if it were science? Negative.
 
2011-09-12 06:06:46 PM  
Your argument changed my mind!
 
2011-09-12 06:07:37 PM  
On the one hand, Richard Leakey has the facts, the theory, the evidence, and reason on his side. On the other hand, his years researching in the sun have left him with skin cancer. So I don't know who to believe. Is that the gist of the headline?
 
2011-09-12 06:08:49 PM  
"Go, spread forth the creationist faith amongst the heathens for I, pastafarius am amused by it."
- Bevets
 
2011-09-12 06:09:26 PM  

Uchiha_Cycliste: Isn't it weird how close that number is to the percentage of Americans that always, ALWAYS, ALWAYS vote GOP?


Cute, you've been on the internet long enough to create a fark account and yet you don't know what a correlation fallacy is. There's a high number of non-Republicans that are creationists.
 
2011-09-12 06:10:39 PM  

Mad Scientist: TedNigma: FlashHarry: it's really depressing that 40 percent of americans believe in creationism.

It's more sad that 60% of Americans don't think people deserve their right to have their own opinion.

Opinion, sure. Right to teach that opinion as if it were science? Negative.


You mean like you are trying to force YOUR opinion on others? Nicely played sir.

Science IS opinion. There is nothing that proves anything, but human interpretation.
 
2011-09-12 06:10:43 PM  

thatguyjoe: On the one hand, Richard Leakey has the facts, the theory, the evidence, and reason on his side. On the other hand, his years researching in the sun have left him with skin cancer. So I don't know who to believe. Is that the gist of the headline?


Obviously, god wanted to punish him for his blasphemy, so definitely.
 
2011-09-12 06:11:17 PM  

Mrbogey: Uchiha_Cycliste: Isn't it weird how close that number is to the percentage of Americans that always, ALWAYS, ALWAYS vote GOP?

Cute, you've been on the internet long enough to create a fark account and yet you don't know what a correlation fallacy is. There's a high number of non-Republicans that are creationists.


yeah... they are "independents" right? I'm gonna say they are GOP.
 
2011-09-12 06:11:29 PM  

TedNigma: FlashHarry: it's really depressing that 40 percent of americans believe in creationism.

It's more sad that 60% of Americans don't think people deserve their right to have their own opinion.


They do. They just shouldn't have the same right to claim their opinions as facts when they aren't.
 
2011-09-12 06:11:30 PM  

TedNigma: It's more sad that 60% of Americans don't think people deserve their right to have their own opinion



That's not an opinion, you farkwit. I can't say the sun revolves around the Earth and get mad when somebody questions my opinion. We have facts and we have the scientific method. When you go making shiat up to suit your religion you aren't expressing an opinion. And when you want your bullshiat taught in science class it isn't opinion.

You're part of what is wrong with this country and you should be ashamed...
 
2011-09-12 06:11:51 PM  

anelson41: Your argument changed my mind!


Want to know how I know you aren't religious?
 
2011-09-12 06:13:17 PM  

pwhp_67: TedNigma: It's more sad that 60% of Americans don't think people deserve their right to have their own opinion


That's not an opinion, you farkwit. I can't say the sun revolves around the Earth and get mad when somebody questions my opinion. We have facts and we have the scientific method. When you go making shiat up to suit your religion you aren't expressing an opinion. And when you want your bullshiat taught in science class it isn't opinion.

You're part of what is wrong with this country and you should be ashamed...


He be trollin' straight outa compton.
 
2011-09-12 06:13:20 PM  

give me doughnuts: anelson41: Your argument changed my mind!

Want to know how I know you aren't religious?


I'm game.
 
2011-09-12 06:13:36 PM  

Mrbogey: There's a high number of non-Republicans that are creationists



Only the ones that are too retarded to register...
 
2011-09-12 06:14:04 PM  

Mrbogey:
There's a high number of non-Republicans that are creationists.


I consider myself a creationist, in the sense that I believe some impetus started the process of life. However, I know that evolution is true. I think a distinction should be made here.

I am gonna generalize but that high number you are talking about probably don't think that evolution is false. Most republican creationists that I have seen though have been from the YEC or OEC variety.
 
2011-09-12 06:14:14 PM  

pwhp_67: TedNigma: It's more sad that 60% of Americans don't think people deserve their right to have their own opinion


That's not an opinion, you farkwit. I can't say the sun revolves around the Earth and get mad when somebody questions my opinion. We have facts and we have the scientific method. When you go making shiat up to suit your religion you aren't expressing an opinion. And when you want your bullshiat taught in science class it isn't opinion.

You're part of what is wrong with this country and you should be ashamed...


A 'fact' is nothing more than a biased opinion from like minded people. Like it's a FACT that the earth revolves around the sun.

This "fact" is actually wrong. It's a cosmic dance of infinite patterns, and paths. You REALLY think the sun is "stationary"? ROFLMAO!
 
2011-09-12 06:14:32 PM  

dahmers love zombie: Science changes as we learn. Religion refuses to change no matter what we learn.

And rocks are not, in fact, ducks.


But now you have idiots who want educators to TEACH THE CONTROVERSY.
 
2011-09-12 06:14:59 PM  

TedNigma: FlashHarry: it's really depressing that 40 percent of americans believe in creationism.

It's more sad that 60% of Americans don't think people deserve their right to have their own opinion.


When those opinions are contributing to the erosion of scientific teachings and thought, then yeah, I would agree with denying that 40% the "right " to bully their opinion to the rest of us
 
2011-09-12 06:15:10 PM  

TedNigma:

Science IS opinion. There is nothing that proves anything, but human interpretation.


Hide your women and children, we got ourselves a relativist troll here.
 
2011-09-12 06:16:14 PM  
This is slowly becoming my new favorite futurama episode (new window)
 
2011-09-12 06:16:50 PM  

Uchiha_Cycliste: yeah... they are "independents" right? I'm gonna say they are GOP.


Yea, facts are for losers.

Seriously, you want to do some research before going stupid partisan? Oh wait... too late.

While Republicans have more Creationists than Democrats, they're still over a third Creationist. Republicans are about half Creationist.

Hate doesn't replace brains. Now go forth and feel ashamed that you were wrong and a Republican had to correct your ignorance.
 
2011-09-12 06:17:37 PM  
All I am saying, is everyone has a right to their opinion without fear of repercussions.

Try spewing this crap in a live speech in a mosque, and tell them that they 72 goats/virgins are a fairytale.

THEN come to me and say how much your "opinion" matters.

Everyone has a right to their opinion. If it makes you mad, then to bad.
 
2011-09-12 06:17:40 PM  
Darn... forgot the link.

http://www.gallup.com/poll/145286/four-americans-believe-strict-creat i onism.aspx
 
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