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(Gawker)   You've seen the lists for best party schools, nerdiest schools and hottest colleges. How about the 25 most unranked schools? Yes, the Cincinnati College of Mortuary Science is on there   (gawker.com) divider line 46
    More: Amusing, party schools, rate of returns, foreign students, know-it-all  
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6310 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Aug 2011 at 11:20 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



46 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2011-08-31 11:26:07 AM
I know some one who went to #11.
 
2011-08-31 11:26:16 AM
This suvey must have been sponsored by the government.

/DNRTFA
//and don't plan to.
 
2011-08-31 11:28:37 AM
The Pioneers? PIONEERS?!

Come on, Transylvania University....your mascot should be a vampire bat.

/Or a werewolf.
 
2011-08-31 11:28:40 AM
From #3: www.geauga.kent.edu

Fully deserving of a caption contest. My entry is, "I LIEK CHOCOLATE MILK!"
 
2011-08-31 11:30:55 AM
By ranking them as being unranked, doesn't that increase the number of times they've been ranked thus meaning they're now less unranked and should no longer be ranked as unranked which would then qualify them for being... oh no, I've gone cross-eyed.
 
2011-08-31 11:35:15 AM
A girl from my highschool went to Cincinnati College of Mortuary Science. She was a huge goth and loved dead things, so I suppose she would be really happy with her career choice.

/CSB
 
2011-08-31 11:38:12 AM
From the mum.edu website.

www.mum.edu
 
2011-08-31 11:46:45 AM
There are palm trees in Utah?
 
2011-08-31 11:46:59 AM
The act of observation has changed state!
Get the cat out of that box!!!!
 
2011-08-31 11:50:33 AM
I refuse to believe that the Cincinnati School of Mortuary Science is real. A tiny school in Ohio that hasn't shown up on Ohio State's football schedule? Unpossible!
 
2011-08-31 11:52:27 AM
Mortuary science? What's their mascot?

"Go fighting Zombies!"
 
2011-08-31 11:54:08 AM
GO Cincinnati College of Mortuary Science Fighting Cadavers!!
 
2011-08-31 11:58:57 AM
The CCMS "Diggers" I think.
 
2011-08-31 12:01:26 PM
I've never tried a University of Wisconsin - Stout, I usually prefer lighter beers.

Our Lady of the Lake College? If I went around saying I was professor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a degree at me, they'd put me away!
 
2011-08-31 12:06:42 PM
HA!

Madonna University at #1! Go Livonia*!

*one of the whitest cities in America with a population of over 100,000**
**I heard it *was* the whitest from a urban planning friend, but I'm not about to find a cite
 
2011-08-31 12:09:18 PM
FTA: *Note: After learning that Thunderbird School of Global Management is, in fact, ranked, we have removed it in favor of a worthy replacement.

If they had gone to the school webpage (new window), the very first thing they would have seen is the school broadcasting the fact that it has been ranked #1 in international business. How much research does Gawker do?

Donnchadha: By ranking them as being unranked, doesn't that increase the number of times they've been ranked thus meaning they're now less unranked and should no longer be ranked as unranked which would then qualify them for being... oh no, I've gone cross-eyed.


Slow down there, Bertrand Russell :)
 
2011-08-31 12:09:51 PM
I belong to the set of all sets which do not contain themselves, so I'm really getting a kick out of these replies.

/Do I contradict myself?
//Very well, then I contradict myself.
 
2011-08-31 12:12:29 PM
My Grandfather went there back in the day. If my memory of his Diploma/Certificate/whatever that he used to keep on his wall serves it was called The Cincinnati School of Embalming back then.

/csb
 
2011-08-31 12:22:06 PM
Had a roommate who went to Cincinnati School of Mortuary Science. Opposite of what you think a mortuary student would be. Very GQ type of guy who was very clean minded and would shower after every crap he took. Seems very incongruous but, hey, business will be good as the boomers die off.

/Yeah, CSB
 
2011-08-31 12:25:07 PM
My ex-GF actually wanted to go to the Cincy college of mort sci, so I've visited it. I also knew a guy that did go there.

/This does not make my life more interesting.
 
2011-08-31 12:30:12 PM
They're dying to get in?
it's all i got...
 
2011-08-31 12:30:44 PM
Where did Hollywood Upstairs Medical School rank?
 
2011-08-31 12:42:47 PM
I know someone that does corneal transplants from cadavers... wonder what school he went to.

I firmly believed morticians were failed doctors or auto mechanics.
 
2011-08-31 12:47:09 PM

Jynxed: I know someone that does corneal transplants from cadavers... wonder what school he went to.

I firmly believed morticians were failed doctors or auto mechanics.


I figured they were table top gamers who realized a way to make some cash from the skills they gained in their hobby.
 
2011-08-31 12:55:09 PM
I played baseball against Transylvania University, so I'm getting a kick...okay...maybe I'm not.
 
2011-08-31 12:56:01 PM

StreetlightInTheGhetto: HA!

Madonna University at #1! Go Livonia*!

*one of the whitest cities in America with a population of over 100,000**
**I heard it *was* the whitest from a urban planning friend, but I'm not about to find a cite


And yesterday they got ranked most speed traps per capita in the US and Canada....
 
2011-08-31 01:00:00 PM
lol, I live near #9.
 
2011-08-31 01:21:09 PM

Ow! That was my feelings!: A tiny school in Ohio that hasn't shown up on Ohio State's football schedule? Unpossible!


OSU already plays a bunch of corpses; they're called Michigan.

Jynxed: I firmly believed morticians were failed doctors or auto mechanics.


Actually, I think I'd fit the profile -- raised in a lower-income family by a CPA. See, there are certain iron-clad recession-proof business out there, and they're based on factors governments and economies can increase whenever but can do little to decrease. People will always eat, fap, fark, drink, pay (or work to avoid) taxes and die, no matter how many laws get passed or how little they make. The food, booze & porn industries aren't affected by recessions so much as brutally competitive, which leaves. . . accounting and mortuaries.

I can imagine some fringe groups flocking to the death business, but in most cases, it strikes me as an unglamorous career that'll never go away. Certain people will see the merit to that. People make money doing this shiat because no one wants to.
 
2011-08-31 01:27:55 PM
GO REBELS, DIXIE STATE!!!
 
2011-08-31 01:46:13 PM

Donnchadha: By ranking them as being unranked, doesn't that increase the number of times they've been ranked thus meaning they're now less unranked and should no longer be ranked as unranked which would then qualify them for being... oh no, I've gone cross-eyed.


Hopefully they ran the algorithm iteratively.
 
2011-08-31 02:00:08 PM
I went to Medialle, it belongs on that list.
 
2011-08-31 02:09:19 PM
USCA all the way, baby! Go Pacers! We're #9! We're#9!
 
2011-08-31 02:15:33 PM

Sticky Hands: Jynxed: I know someone that does corneal transplants from cadavers... wonder what school he went to.

I firmly believed morticians were failed doctors or auto mechanics.

I figured they were table top gamers who realized a way to make some cash from the skills they gained in their hobby.


knowyourmeme.com
 
2011-08-31 03:11:45 PM
Am I the only one that is so old here that "Cogswell" brought back fond memories and a slight moistening of the eye?

"rut roh rorge'"
 
2011-08-31 03:20:52 PM

tommyl66: I've never tried a University of Wisconsin - Stout, I usually prefer lighter beers.


Stout, Stout, the easy way out.
 
2011-08-31 03:33:37 PM

mcwehrle: Am I the only one that is so old here that "Cogswell" brought back fond memories and a slight moistening of the eye?

"rut roh rorge'"


I thought the same thing!

/Mr. Spaceley doesn't care.
 
2011-08-31 03:43:41 PM
CSB Time- I went to high school across the street from the Cincinnati College of Mortuary Science. Kinda creepy to think of the dead bodies over there.
 
2011-08-31 03:56:15 PM

puddleonfire: mcwehrle: Am I the only one that is so old here that "Cogswell" brought back fond memories and a slight moistening of the eye?

"rut roh rorge'"

I thought the same thing!

/Mr. Spaceley doesn't care.


i1133.photobucket.com

hee hee nope.
 
2011-08-31 04:10:20 PM
CCMS has a softball team . 30 years ago it was on the edgecliff campus after moving from Reading road. One of thetop two school for funeral service in the county if you look up the alumni they are form USA, Canada and a number of other countries just depends how you rank them I guess.
 
2011-08-31 04:15:07 PM

bglove25: CSB Time- I went to high school across the street from the Cincinnati College of Mortuary Science. Kinda creepy to think of the dead bodies over there.


Its such a nice part of town. Last place you'd expect a zombie uprising...

/No srsly...I ride my motorcycle past there quite a bit and never noticed the CCMS the first months and months riding by. I have avoided it since this discovery.
 
2011-08-31 06:16:14 PM
I clicked on the link to the Dixie State website and it said I was pre-accepted.
 
2011-08-31 07:49:41 PM
When in doubt, go to Stout. Should you despair, try Eau Claire.

/advising chant from Hudson, Wisconsin
 
2011-08-31 10:57:07 PM
I think the weirdest part of being a mortician would be dealing with the grieving families. Cutting up bodies actually doesn't sound bad, whether you're a mortician or a medical examiner or whatever...
 
2011-09-01 12:39:10 AM

FerneJohn: I think the weirdest part of being a mortician would be dealing with the grieving families. Cutting up bodies actually doesn't sound bad, whether you're a mortician or a medical examiner or whatever...


Like anything else, it's something that comes with practice and experience. Calming phrases and tone are something that come to people that learn to soothe pain and anguish.Innate empathy is a plus, and calm but loving demeanor are helpful.

Numerous sociology tomes could describe death rites and their meaning to you, but the point is, death is a part of life, and there are trained people to help with that stage of life. It wouldn't be for everyone.

/wiki welsh sin eater
 
2011-09-01 08:48:24 AM

FerneJohn: I think the weirdest part of being a mortician would be dealing with the grieving families.


The grieving families I can deal with. I've kind of been the guy who holds the room together the last few times a friend or relative died. Empathy comes naturally for me at this point. Dealing with good people dying is easy. There are no things left unsaid, no unfinished grudges, just an outpouring of appreciation and grief. The emotions are sad, but they're pure and genuine. Good people don't leave behind a complicated situation for anyone to deal with.

Thing is, you don't just deal with the loved snowflake that tragically dies in a gasoline party. What would get to me as a mortician would be the cases where dignity doesn't have a seat in the house. The sex offender that gets beaten to death in jail, the crazy homeless guy no one shows up to claim, the murder victim the cops looted. . . they all leave behind corpses, too. Then there's the old lady who committed suicide in a nursing home because the first time her daughter saw her in 15 years (because the old lady herself was a crazy biatch) was to pay you for disposing of her corpse, so of course the daughter whines about how much money you're costing her and can you get this over with quickly she has a hair appointment at 1:30.
 
2011-09-01 10:19:50 AM
This list is worthless without Miskatonic University, home of the Fighting Cephalopods!
 
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