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(MetroWest Daily News)   Woman gets in fight with boyfriend, storms off, falls down cliff, spends three days in wilderness eating bugs hoping he'll come back to her   (metrowestdailynews.com) divider line 101
    More: Dumbass, Holliston, Oregon, x-intercept  
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13616 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Aug 2011 at 4:59 PM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2011-08-09 05:36:13 PM

Snot Monster from Outer Space: gregory311: "I never thought about giving up..."

It was three days, toots, not three months or weeks, even.

With a badly broken leg, severe lacerations and an injured back, and wearing only a tank-top and shorts. I'm sure it would be nothing for an internet tough guy such as yourself, but many people find these things which are so trivial to you quite challenging.


Pretty much this. People can die with three days of exposure if they are under-equipped depending on where she was. At least she had water and bugs. And I disagree with she should have just starved. If the food is available, then eat it and keep your strength up. Any survivalist will tell you that.
 
2011-08-09 05:38:03 PM
Did she love Tom Gordon?
 
2011-08-09 05:38:40 PM

Milamber1a: I Said: No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.

LOL... nice! Needed laughter to close out my day. Now to call my wife to make sure she has dinner ready for me by the time I get home, and a beer open and ready in a frosted glass.


You have to call her to make sure she does this for you?
 
2011-08-09 05:40:01 PM

Milamber1a: I Said: No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.

LOL... nice! Needed laughter to close out my day. Now to call my wife to make sure she has dinner ready for me by the time I get home, and a beer open and ready in a frosted glass.


Way ahead of you buddy, I'm helping her frost the glass as we speak.
 
2011-08-09 05:41:50 PM
first problem i has was the use of a word from the second reporter
(these people are paid to talk) "INSTINK" did she not read the prompter or is that what was typed? second problem-why would you need a map not to fall down a 50 foot hole?
 
2011-08-09 05:43:37 PM

I read fark for the pics: You have to call her to make sure she does this for you?


He doesn't want a repeat of the last time she had forgot. Plus if both eyes are black, how can she see to make his dinner and pour his beer?
 
2011-08-09 05:44:31 PM

hailin: Snot Monster from Outer Space: gregory311: "I never thought about giving up..."

It was three days, toots, not three months or weeks, even.

With a badly broken leg, severe lacerations and an injured back, and wearing only a tank-top and shorts. I'm sure it would be nothing for an internet tough guy such as yourself, but many people find these things which are so trivial to you quite challenging.

Pretty much this. People can die with three days of exposure if they are under-equipped depending on where she was. At least she had water and bugs. And I disagree with she should have just starved. If the food is available, then eat it and keep your strength up. Any survivalist will tell you that.


Another piece of solid advice: In a survival situation spend the night in hotels.

www.daveandthomas.net
 
2011-08-09 05:46:03 PM
As a man typing this while making dinner and waiting for my wife to come home from work, I'm getting a...no, actually I'm kind of confused.
 
2011-08-09 05:46:32 PM

lockers: I read fark for the pics: You have to call her to make sure she does this for you?

He doesn't want a repeat of the last time she had forgot. Plus if both eyes are black, how can she see to make his dinner and pour his beer?


Exactly! I'm not heartless now! I have to think of her sometimes too. Like just the other day I told her she could get herself something special in the kitchen area of Bed Bath & Beyond.
 
2011-08-09 05:48:48 PM
A pair of stockings, a pair of shoes
A record by The Moody Blues
A bottle of Chanel No. 5
A poster of a band called Dead or Alive
A silk negligee and a black garter belt
A book about how to get to know yourself
A shirt you adopted used to be mine
These are some of the things you left behind
 
2011-08-09 05:51:00 PM

Mr Rusty Shackleford: Smooth, lady. Let me guess, all your boyfriend wanted was for you to shut your yapper for 5 minutes so he could take in the sounds of nature and you just weren't having it peacefully. I guess you won.


img341.imageshack.us
 
2011-08-09 05:54:36 PM

Mr. Potatoass: Three days was the morning.
My focus three days old.
My head, it landed
To the sounds of cricket bows


www.bluegrasses.com
 
2011-08-09 05:55:11 PM

JesseL: gregory311: Why don't you ask me if I've ever been in a situation like this before you and your little pal there assume I haven't?

/wow, that would be too hard, wouldn't it?


Have you?


It's too late. We've upset him.

What's the over/under on the phrase "wow, that would be too hard, wouldn't it?" being uttered at least once during this couple's argument?
 
2011-08-09 05:55:29 PM
before i click on the report, just need to know if she is hot.

lazy day for me
 
2011-08-09 05:58:41 PM

bilk2455: before i click on the report, just need to know if she is hot.

lazy day for me


Think David Spade with long wavy hair.
 
2011-08-09 05:58:52 PM
She said she survived by eating bugs, berries and drinking creek water.

OK, if you have water and berries, and it's only been 2-3 days, do you really go all Zimmern and eat bugs?
 
2011-08-09 05:59:35 PM
That guy is farking lucky she didn't die. Trying to convince people he didn't kill her after not reporting her missing would be real fun.

I wouldn't take her camping again. Especially if what she came out of it is that she needed to look at the map more, rather than 1) needing to keep a phone 2) keeping to marked trails or 3) waiting until you are camped before having an idiotic fight with your boyfriend.
 
2011-08-09 06:01:57 PM

metametameta: Trying to convince people he didn't kill her after not reporting her missing would be real fun


He did report her missing. That's why there were helicopters searching for her.
 
2011-08-09 06:02:59 PM
welcome to oregon watch that first step folks
 
2011-08-09 06:11:16 PM

lockers: There brittle and can break easily with that kind of honesty.


They can even spell.
 
2011-08-09 06:15:46 PM

SueDisco: lockers: There brittle and can break easily with that kind of honesty.

They can even spell.


Can they ever! She turned me into a Newt just the other day.

/I got better
 
2011-08-09 06:16:21 PM
I sense some bitterness here.
 
2011-08-09 06:17:25 PM

I Said: FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.


AWESOME!
 
2011-08-09 06:22:32 PM
So if a man and woman argue in the woods and she falls off a cliff, is he still wrong?
 
2011-08-09 06:24:12 PM

Milamber1a: bilk2455: before i click on the report, just need to know if she is hot.
lazy day for me
Think David Spade with long wavy hair.


David Spade does have long way hair.


I saw this on the Today show this morning, and it did not say that they had an argument. It said that they'd split up to find a good place to camp. So that explains everything--I was wondering why her boyfriend didn't go looking for her, or why he wasn't able to find her.

greenwestborough.files.wordpress.com

Points and laughs
/with his claw
 
2011-08-09 06:26:19 PM

SueDisco: lockers: There brittle and can break easily with that kind of honesty.

They can even spell.


Kinda late to that party, aren't you?
 
2011-08-09 06:37:22 PM
Maybe that'll teach her to learn how to make a sandwich...
 
2011-08-09 06:45:52 PM

edmo: So if a man and woman argue in the woods and she falls off a cliff, is he still wrong?


No. Winning!
 
2011-08-09 06:49:44 PM

metametameta: I wouldn't take her camping again. Especially if what she came out of it is that she needed to look at the map more, rather than 1) needing to keep a phone 2) keeping to marked trails or 3) waiting until you are camped before having an idiotic fight with your boyfriend.


I'm tempted to snark, but I won't, so you'll take this seriously, because if you don't you are inevitably going to become a Fark headline yourself:

First, in real back country there is no cellphone coverage as soon as you go around that first hill (which one of the reasons I go into the back country). So don't rely on a cell phone. You could get a sat phone (super expensive) or a SPOT messenger (cheap, but limited communication) but ultimately, you should be relying on yourself to get your own ass out of trouble.

Second: Very few trails are "marked". Even on official trails in national parks, there may be signs at trail junctions, but there aren't necessarily big orange arrows on every other tree pointing the way. The trail can be obscured by overgrowth, washouts, snow, rock fall, fallen trees or avalanches, especially in the spring. They can be confused by game trails or old logging trails. There can be something on the trail that forces you off of it so that you have to find another way around (avalanche, bear, washed out bridge). There may be no trail, and you're bushwhacking your own way. Don't depend on trail markers. Don't dismiss looking at a map. Don't rely on GPS. Learn how to read a map and use a compass before you get a GPS. If you use a GPS (a dedicated one, not a phone), continue to carry a map and compass.

Search & Rescue thanks you.

And if that was a troll, well then, carry on.
 
2011-08-09 06:52:06 PM
3 days and she was already eating bugs?
 
2011-08-09 06:58:41 PM

I Said: FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.


Well, except for the trolly bits, you're absolutely right. Her biggest mistake was wandering off alone in an unfamiliar wilderness area. Anyone can get lost, fall and become injured, and then hope they're rescued before they die.

Too bad boyfriend wasn't the one who got lost, then I could say neener-neener-neener, you piggy fool.
 
2011-08-09 07:03:56 PM
The best luck was had by the boyfriend who got to find out what a psycho biatch coont she was before any more time was wasted on the relationship. He's probably still shaking from his close call.
 
2011-08-09 07:06:59 PM

OscarTamerz: The best luck was had by the boyfriend who got to find out what a psycho biatch coont she was before any more time was wasted on the relationship. He's probably still shaking from his close call.


STFU - He was dick enough to piss her off and let her go off by herself. She should dump him, and he should be glad that he's not up on murder or endangerment charges.
She's right about the map.
 
2011-08-09 07:24:57 PM

AbbeySomeone: She's right about the map.


I don't see how the map would be particularly useful in her case. Without mobility, travel options are limited. Obviously she came in from somewhere above of the creek in the ravine, guessing almost directly up the fall line from where she landed. That should be enough to get her back on track, assuming she can move.

As for her primary mistake, a map will not prevent you from falling.
 
2011-08-09 07:31:09 PM
files.sharenator.com
 
2011-08-09 07:35:12 PM

AbbeySomeone: OscarTamerz: The best luck was had by the boyfriend who got to find out what a psycho biatch coont she was before any more time was wasted on the relationship. He's probably still shaking from his close call.

STFU - He was dick enough to piss her off and let her go off by herself. She should dump him, and he should be glad that he's not up on murder or endangerment charges.
She's right about the map.


Yep, because a grown ass adult choosing to wander off into the wilderness by themselves is CLEARLY the fault of other people. What an asshole he was for not physically restraining her during an argument! Then he could have gone to jail for domestic abuse, and you could post outraged comments about that!

/are you farking serious?
 
TWX
2011-08-09 07:37:19 PM

paygun: Why aren't people embarrassed when they do things like this?


I blame "reality" TV. We're shown how the worst people are the example through every network's race to the bottom, and you're surprised that people emulate it?
 
2011-08-09 07:51:28 PM
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2011-08-09 08:22:22 PM
gregory311

>>> Oh, you! So cute when you post on the internet! You're just simply adorable!

Perhaps if you went outside once in a while you'd realize that this isn't that big of a deal.

... but then she'd be lost too.
 
2011-08-09 08:27:25 PM

TiiiMMMaHHH: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 627x448]


...so is the "Male Brain" just one huge space full of "JACK OFF"?
 
2011-08-09 08:35:35 PM
Ta Da!
 
2011-08-09 08:49:29 PM
You know, when you're out wandering around the wilderness, the best way out is usually the way you came in. That's the best way--the other ways are all bad. That's why the trail is right there. So why didn't they just split up and follow each other down the way they came in? She could have sat and pouted for an hour, then gone down.

Unless they had compasses or a GPS, it's retarded to just decide to skip the trail and find some other way out.
 
2011-08-09 09:00:47 PM

I Said: FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.


Also, the thought that she could read a map.
 
2011-08-09 09:04:41 PM

cryinoutloud:

[greenwestborough.files.wordpress.com image 450x318]

Points and laughs
/with his claw


Came for this, leaving satisfied.
 
2011-08-09 09:13:00 PM

Gyrfalcon: TiiiMMMaHHH: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 627x448]

...so is the "Male Brain" just one huge space full of "JACK OFF"?


No, there's a "nothing" box, a "sex" box, and a "do something productive" box. The sex box IS the largest but the rest are fairly large too.
 
2011-08-09 09:45:55 PM
What the boyfriend might look like:

img265.imageshack.us
 
2011-08-09 11:15:25 PM
I hear the SEALs have a few open reqs. With her wilderness survival skills, she'd be a natural.
 
2011-08-09 11:19:08 PM
She's an idiot, but good on her for eating what she can. She didn't know how long she'd be there, after all.
 
2011-08-09 11:50:16 PM

Gyrfalcon: TiiiMMMaHHH: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 627x448]

...so is the "Male Brain" just one huge space full of "JACK OFF"?


For one thing, it's shaped like a penis...

/every bad standup comic ever
 
2011-08-10 08:48:33 AM
I'm sure she was pissed because he didn't want to go that way because of a dangerous 50 foot drop and he didn't want to break his leg and eat bugs for 3 days.
 
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