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(MetroWest Daily News)   Woman gets in fight with boyfriend, storms off, falls down cliff, spends three days in wilderness eating bugs hoping he'll come back to her   (metrowestdailynews.com) divider line 101
    More: Dumbass, Holliston, Oregon, x-intercept  
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13606 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Aug 2011 at 4:59 PM   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2011-08-09 04:25:18 PM
I know it upset you when he mentioned that you put on a few pounds, but this diet was a bit extreme.
 
2011-08-09 04:47:41 PM
FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.
 
2011-08-09 05:01:56 PM
They decided it would be a good idea to go on their separate ways while hiking in the woods? Morans, both of them.
 
2011-08-09 05:02:00 PM
so three days of peace and quiet for the boyfriend
 
2011-08-09 05:02:22 PM
"I never thought about giving up..."

It was three days, toots, not three months or weeks, even.
 
2011-08-09 05:02:27 PM
Woman gets in fight with boyfriend, storms off, falls down cliff, spends three days in wilderness eating bugs hoping he'll come back to her
taadaa.... Aristocrats!
 
2011-08-09 05:03:48 PM
I Said: FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.


Lol, I know that'll get a few bites from the fem-nazi crowd. Maybe post it on the Jezebel boards too.
 
2011-08-09 05:04:42 PM
The make-up sex will be legendary.
 
2011-08-09 05:05:23 PM
In the old days, this would qualify her as a prophetess.
 
2011-08-09 05:05:28 PM
Ninety nine problems, but a hiking companion ain't one.
 
2011-08-09 05:05:57 PM
From the follow up story tomorrow...

"OK look, I knew where the biatch was the whole time. Can you blame me?"
 
2011-08-09 05:07:39 PM
Three days was the morning.
My focus three days old.
My head, it landed
To the sounds of cricket bows
 
2011-08-09 05:09:31 PM
bearcats1983: I Said: FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.

Lol, I know that'll get a few bites from the fem-nazi crowd. Maybe post it on the Jezebel boards too.


Too obvious.
 
2011-08-09 05:10:24 PM
RedEmily: bearcats1983: I Said: FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.

Lol, I know that'll get a few bites from the fem-nazi crowd. Maybe post it on the Jezebel boards too.

Too obvious.


I made it obvious so women would get the joke.
 
2011-08-09 05:11:13 PM
Smooth, lady. Let me guess, all your boyfriend wanted was for you to shut your yapper for 5 minutes so he could take in the sounds of nature and you just weren't having it peacefully. I guess you won.

As for eating bugs and whatnot for survival, you'd be hard pressed to starve in 3 days time.
 
2011-08-09 05:11:27 PM
I may be wrong here,

but three days isn't that long. Well, it's not that long that i'd start eating bugs. I think the water and berries would be fine.
 
2011-08-09 05:11:53 PM
Red Hair Warning! Danger Will Robinson....Danger!
 
2011-08-09 05:12:09 PM
She "fell", yeah, that's the ticket.
 
2011-08-09 05:12:16 PM
gregory311: "I never thought about giving up..."

It was three days, toots, not three months or weeks, even.


With a badly broken leg, severe lacerations and an injured back, and wearing only a tank-top and shorts. I'm sure it would be nothing for an internet tough guy such as yourself, but many people find these things which are so trivial to you quite challenging.
 
2011-08-09 05:12:47 PM
I bet he didn't contact authorities until their apartment started to look a little messy and he was hungry.
 
2011-08-09 05:12:48 PM
seanwlambert: I may be wrong here,

but three days isn't that long. Well, it's not that long that i'd start eating bugs. I think the water and berries would be fine.


I agree

cdn.randomfunnypicture.com

Reminds me of an old SNL skit where people were stranded somewhere for 4 hours and began eating each other.
 
2011-08-09 05:13:47 PM
RedEmily: bearcats1983: I Said: FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.

Lol, I know that'll get a few bites from the fem-nazi crowd. Maybe post it on the Jezebel boards too.

Too obvious.


Too obvious that women need men to guide them through survival situations? I agree, but it seems a little harsh to point it out. You should have dialed it back a bit to spare the fragile ladies sensibilities. There brittle and can break easily with that kind of honesty.
 
2011-08-09 05:15:24 PM
Watch an interview with Salant below:

First I did something stupid. Then I did something stupider. Now I'm on TV. SUCCESS!
 
2011-08-09 05:15:47 PM
Snot Monster from Outer Space: gregory311: "I never thought about giving up..."

It was three days, toots, not three months or weeks, even.

With a badly broken leg, severe lacerations and an injured back, and wearing only a tank-top and shorts. I'm sure it would be nothing for an internet tough guy such as yourself, but many people find these things which are so trivial to you quite challenging.


Seriously, I was gonna say, even if the reason for it happening was silly it wasnt like she was just walking through the woods playing with birds. I'm sure the poster up there would be crying like a baby if they had a badly broken leg for "3 days, toots".
 
2011-08-09 05:16:36 PM
If they hadn't found her body then you know the boyfriend's ass would have been in jail on murder charges.

White girls don't go missing without some dude taking the fall.
 
2011-08-09 05:16:42 PM
Snot Monster from Outer Space: gregory311: "I never thought about giving up..."

It was three days, toots, not three months or weeks, even.

With a badly broken leg, severe lacerations and an injured back, and wearing only a tank-top and shorts. I'm sure it would be nothing for an internet tough guy such as yourself, but many people find these things which are so trivial to you quite challenging.


Oh, you! So cute when you post on the internet! You're just simply adorable!

Perhaps if you went outside once in a while you'd realize that this isn't that big of a deal.
 
2011-08-09 05:17:33 PM
cgraves67: I bet he didn't contact authorities until their apartment started to look a little messy and he was hungry.

I started to say that you were right. Then I remembered what happened the last time a man was without a woman to care for him:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/04/12/berndt-twins-dead-mother-houston_n_848 3 29.html
 
2011-08-09 05:18:05 PM
Electromax: Snot Monster from Outer Space: gregory311: "I never thought about giving up..."

It was three days, toots, not three months or weeks, even.

With a badly broken leg, severe lacerations and an injured back, and wearing only a tank-top and shorts. I'm sure it would be nothing for an internet tough guy such as yourself, but many people find these things which are so trivial to you quite challenging.

Seriously, I was gonna say, even if the reason for it happening was silly it wasnt like she was just walking through the woods playing with birds. I'm sure the poster up there would be crying like a baby if they had a badly broken leg for "3 days, toots".


Why don't you ask me if I've ever been in a situation like this before you and your little pal there assume I haven't?

/wow, that would be too hard, wouldn't it?
 
2011-08-09 05:19:10 PM
Rann Xerox: The make-up sex will be legendary.

Only if he's the one to rescue her.

He wasn't.
 
2011-08-09 05:20:11 PM
generallyso: Rann Xerox: The make-up sex will be legendary.

Only if he's the one to rescue her.

He wasn't.


The makeup sex with his other girlfriend.
 
2011-08-09 05:20:50 PM
I bet you anything the police were looking at the boyfriend to be a person of interest in the disappearance of an attractive white female, after they separated in woods.
 
2011-08-09 05:20:54 PM
lockers: RedEmily: bearcats1983: I Said: FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.

Lol, I know that'll get a few bites from the fem-nazi crowd. Maybe post it on the Jezebel boards too.

Too obvious.

Too obvious that women need men to guide them through survival situations? I agree, but it seems a little harsh to point it out. You should have dialed it back a bit to spare the fragile ladies sensibilities. There brittle and can break easily with that kind of honesty.


Where brittle?
 
2011-08-09 05:20:56 PM
gregory311: Perhaps if you went outside once in a while you'd realize that this isn't that big of a deal.

You heard the internet tough guy folks; surviving in the wilderness for three days with broken limbs is no big deal. We can all go home now.

/DIAF
 
2011-08-09 05:21:43 PM
EuphoniumEuphoria: cgraves67: I bet he didn't contact authorities until their apartment started to look a little messy and he was hungry.

I started to say that you were right. Then I remembered what happened the last time a man was without a woman to care for him:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/04/12/berndt-twins-dead-mother-houston_n_848 3 29.html


Fixed link:
Link
 
2011-08-09 05:21:58 PM
gregory311: Electromax: Snot Monster from Outer Space: gregory311: "I never thought about giving up..."

It was three days, toots, not three months or weeks, even.

With a badly broken leg, severe lacerations and an injured back, and wearing only a tank-top and shorts. I'm sure it would be nothing for an internet tough guy such as yourself, but many people find these things which are so trivial to you quite challenging.

Seriously, I was gonna say, even if the reason for it happening was silly it wasnt like she was just walking through the woods playing with birds. I'm sure the poster up there would be crying like a baby if they had a badly broken leg for "3 days, toots".

Why don't you ask me if I've ever been in a situation like this before you and your little pal there assume I haven't?

/wow, that would be too hard, wouldn't it?


It happened to me once in the Marine Core, but they teach us how to handle minor mishaps like that.
 
2011-08-09 05:22:07 PM
otaku69: I bet you anything the police were looking at the boyfriend to be a person of interest in the disappearance of an attractive white female, after they separated in woods.

Attractive? That's a rough looking 28.
 
2011-08-09 05:22:14 PM
Why aren't people embarrassed when they do things like this?
 
2011-08-09 05:22:24 PM
I read fark for the pics: lockers: RedEmily: bearcats1983: I Said: FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.

Lol, I know that'll get a few bites from the fem-nazi crowd. Maybe post it on the Jezebel boards too.

Too obvious.

Too obvious that women need men to guide them through survival situations? I agree, but it seems a little harsh to point it out. You should have dialed it back a bit to spare the fragile ladies sensibilities. There brittle and can break easily with that kind of honesty.

Where brittle?


you know, over they're.
 
2011-08-09 05:22:54 PM
gregory311: Why don't you ask me if I've ever been in a situation like this before you and your little pal there assume I haven't?

I used to do a lot of little trips like that for fun.. knife, 2 or 3 matches, and basic summer clothes. Granted, I never compromised my bones or skin to simulate a true boneheaded mistake. Fun stuff for a youthful lad. If she hadn't done an uncontrolled decent of the ravine, it might've been a great time.
 
2011-08-09 05:23:09 PM
Snot Monster from Outer Space: With a badly broken leg, severe lacerations and an injured back, and wearing only a tank-top and shorts. I'm sure it would be nothing for an internet tough guy such as yourself, but many people find these things which are so trivial to you quite challenging.

I know this isn't where you're going with this, but it reminded me... Dude here was a Green Beret and told me about his sergeant. They parachuted into some training exercise and something (don't remember what) went wrong, and the sergeant ended up with some sort of pain in his neck. He figured he'd walk it off, which he did for 15 miles until they got to camp. Somehow the lieutenant heard about this pain he'd walked off and told him to report to the medical tent, where they found out he'd somehow broken his neck. And then walked it off. Naturally, he was returned to base for treatment.

I make no claims to being able to walk off a broken neck, but I consider myself fully capable of saying "Duuuuuude..." when I hear about someone that can.
 
2011-08-09 05:23:26 PM
I love how they ignored what the fight was about or how she stupidly stormed off in anger. Not to mention going off the trail and over a ravine.

Yes, this brave woman is a true hero.
 
2011-08-09 05:23:51 PM
Bet she will make the samich next time.
 
2011-08-09 05:24:38 PM
I Said: FTA: She said her biggest mistake was failing to review maps of the area with her boyfriend before their trip.

No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.


THREAD WINNAR!

I LOL'd.
 
2011-08-09 05:25:06 PM
gregory311: Why don't you ask me if I've ever been in a situation like this before you and your little pal there assume I haven't?

/wow, that would be too hard, wouldn't it?



Have you?
 
2011-08-09 05:26:37 PM
So much trolling.

So much biting.
 
2011-08-09 05:27:10 PM
This thread is absolutely hilarious for so many different reasons.
 
2011-08-09 05:28:42 PM
I Said: No. Your biggest mistake was walking away from your boyfriend and thinking you could survive in this harsh cruel world on your own. You're a woman and you just learned the hard way how long you'll last without a man around to guide and protect you.

LOL... nice! Needed laughter to close out my day. Now to call my wife to make sure she has dinner ready for me by the time I get home, and a beer open and ready in a frosted glass.
 
2011-08-09 05:31:01 PM
gregory311: Why don't you ask me if I've ever been in a situation like this before you and your little pal there assume I haven't?

/wow, that would be too hard, wouldn't it?


Yeah, that time you had a hangnail was harrowing, we know. Plus there was that one time when your Mom only bought ten packets of Doritos and told you that would have to last you the week. Those next six days were the toughest of your life.
 
2011-08-09 05:32:45 PM
I Said: Reminds me of an old SNL skit where people were stranded somewhere for 4 hours and began eating each other.

The weatherman is DEAD! I KILLED the weatherman! His STRENGTH is in me! (new window)

/not sure if that's the one you were thinking of, but it's funny as hell
 
2011-08-09 05:35:22 PM
A woman reacting childishly to an argument and stomping off? What a scoop!

If you replace "three days in the wilderness eating bugs" with "three hours at the kitchen table eating Mallomars" you have every argument in the history of dating.
 
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