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(Arizona Star)   Video backs Colorado sheriff on dispute with Duane "Dog" Chapman bounty hunter complaint. Bossk, Zuckuss, 4-LOM, IG-88, Boushh, Dengar, Boba Fett unavailable for comment   (azstarnet.com) divider line 113
    More: Cool, Colorado, bounty hunters, Grand Junction, bounty hunter complaint, failure to appear, sheriffs  
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12870 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Jul 2011 at 2:28 PM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



113 Comments   (+0 »)
   

Archived thread
 
2011-07-28 02:29:15 PM
Star Trek sucks.
 
2011-07-28 02:29:33 PM
The fact that this guy can legally do what he does is just plain depressing.
 
2011-07-28 02:30:34 PM
Greedo also unavailable for comment
 
2011-07-28 02:31:02 PM
I wonder what galaxy the videos would have disappeared to if the tape exonerated Dog?
 
2011-07-28 02:31:04 PM
I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it
 
2011-07-28 02:32:19 PM
I'll be sure and file this one under "who gives a fark"
 
2011-07-28 02:32:35 PM

Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it


This is a joke, yes?
 
2011-07-28 02:32:45 PM
I miss Grand Junction

/Mesa State '09
//It will never be Colorado Mesa
 
2011-07-28 02:32:48 PM
Bounty hunters? We don't need that..scum...
 
2011-07-28 02:32:58 PM

Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it


Those are the names of the other bounty hunters standing on the Star Destroyer when Darth was telling them to find Han ("No disintegration!").
 
2011-07-28 02:33:20 PM

Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it


images.wikia.com
 
2011-07-28 02:34:25 PM

Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it


That's not extended; that's the list of bounty hunters onboard the Executor while Vader was handing out the bounty on Solo, duh!

/no disintegrations
 
2011-07-28 02:34:26 PM

Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it


Your nerd card is hereby revoked.
 
2011-07-28 02:34:32 PM

Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it


Those are the names of the other bounty hunters who were hired by Darth Vader during Empire Strikes Back. I don't know if their names were created in the extended universe or not.
 
2011-07-28 02:34:48 PM
They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.

/still have all the action figures somewhere...
 
2011-07-28 02:34:55 PM
Lexx wasn't allowed to play with action figures, obviously...
 
2011-07-28 02:35:09 PM

Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.


The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.
 
2011-07-28 02:35:29 PM

Lexx: //extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it


Oh, and "canon" is defined as Lucasfilm as "the screenplays, the films, the radio dramas and the novelizations." So yeah, there's that, too...
 
2011-07-28 02:35:51 PM
Man... why aren't there nudes of Beth? Or a sex tape or something. Mmmm....
 
2011-07-28 02:35:51 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.


The name didn't give it away, it seems.

/notsureifserious.jpg
 
2011-07-28 02:35:54 PM
My post was slower than a gunsling with Greedo

/he didn't shoot first
 
2011-07-28 02:36:14 PM

Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it


troll.me
 
2011-07-28 02:36:19 PM

Hyppy: Lexx: //extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

Oh, and "canon" is defined as Lucasfilm as "the screenplays, the films, the radio dramas and the novelizations." So yeah, there's that, too...


-Christmas Special
 
2011-07-28 02:36:30 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.


I got one!
 
2011-07-28 02:36:31 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.


He's right though. Star Trek does suck.
 
2011-07-28 02:37:45 PM

Underabridge: I got one!


If you had any pride in your craft, you would not declare victory.
 
2011-07-28 02:37:59 PM
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2011-07-28 02:38:32 PM
Did he forget to fill out his B23-1-14?
 
2011-07-28 02:38:44 PM

ArtosRC: Underabridge: I got one!

If you had any pride in your craft, you would not declare victory.


Sorry but that just got me out of long dry spell. I can't contain myself.
 
2011-07-28 02:39:41 PM

Underabridge: ArtosRC: Underabridge: I got one!

If you had any pride in your craft, you would not declare victory.

Sorry but that just got me out of long dry spell. I can't contain myself.


Eh, if I know AAG like I think I do, he was probably just counter-trolling you.
 
2011-07-28 02:39:47 PM
Holy FSM, that was weak.
 
2011-07-28 02:40:29 PM

bhcompy: Greedo also unavailable for comment


Thread win.
 
2011-07-28 02:40:58 PM

DamienC: They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.


Thank you! I was sitting here racking my brain trying to figure out who the hell Boussh was. I knew that I knew the name, but just couldn't put it together, and I didn't want to go looking for it.

My once-encyclopedic knowledge of Star Wars has obviously suffered over the years. I have shame.

/commits lightsaber sepuku
 
2011-07-28 02:42:13 PM

ArtosRC: AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.

The name didn't give it away, it seems.

/notsureifserious.jpg


Unless, of course, AverageAmericanGuy was quite subtly counter-trolling, in which case his was a masterful act of subterfuge.
 
2011-07-28 02:42:29 PM

Teen Wolf Blitzer: Man... why aren't there nudes of Beth? Or a sex tape or something. Mmmm....


Torpedo tits?
 
2011-07-28 02:42:45 PM

Underabridge: AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.

I got one!


Nah man, I think he got you.
 
2011-07-28 02:43:05 PM

Underabridge: ArtosRC: Underabridge: I got one!

If you had any pride in your craft, you would not declare victory.

Sorry but that just got me out of long dry spell. I can't contain myself.


Yeah, but that'Ks like shooting the blind deer with 2 broken legs. You roped one, but it's too retarded to keep. You gotta throw it back.
 
2011-07-28 02:43:23 PM
Well, I guess they should lock that sheriff up for violating wiretapping laws. Unless he had a warrant to tape them I think he should be tried.
 
2011-07-28 02:43:53 PM
Isn't mentioning "the Christmas Special" in a Star Wars thread kinda like a Godwin?
 
2011-07-28 02:43:55 PM

Teen Wolf Blitzer: Eh, if I know AAG like I think I do, he was probably just counter-trolling you.


This. You let them make the mistake and dig themselves deeper; in the event of a counter-troll, you either counter-counter-troll or, to troll hard, ignore it completely.

Never justify.

That's, like, rule 342, subsection F, paragraph seven. How do you not know this?


/Star Wars is only culturally-relevant for nostalgia's sake
 
2011-07-28 02:44:21 PM

Hyppy: No disintegration!


Oh shucks
/I'm wearing no shoes
 
2011-07-28 02:44:35 PM
Why U No Link Video?
 
2011-07-28 02:45:20 PM
This is some fine entertainment on a lazy Thursday afternoon!
Live long and prosper!
 
2011-07-28 02:45:30 PM

Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are blah blah characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe blah blah blah it


No disintergrations! (new window)
 
2011-07-28 02:46:11 PM

Current Resident: Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

[troll.me image 552x414]


I somehow trolled better than the headline?
 
2011-07-28 02:46:33 PM
A must read for the star wars geek:

i43.tower.com

IG-88: Think skynet with a body.
 
2011-07-28 02:47:20 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2011-07-28 02:47:58 PM
I heard the police also were pretty sure Dog had rubbed cats all over the suspect, and they are really allergic!
 
2011-07-28 02:48:03 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.


see 1:35 (new window)
 
2011-07-28 02:48:43 PM

Agent Smiths Laugh: ArtosRC: AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.

The name didn't give it away, it seems.

/notsureifserious.jpg

Unless, of course, AverageAmericanGuy was quite subtly counter-trolling, in which case his was a masterful act of subterfuge.


Um no.
 
2011-07-28 02:49:24 PM

ha-ha-guy: The fact that this guy can legally do what he does is just plain depressing.


agreed.

pepper-spraying and capturing a wanted fugitive and then delivering that fugitive to the police is disgusting.

i would be much happier if Dog just shot the criminals to death.

or beat them to death.

i suppose i would trust Dog to best decide how these escaped dangerous fugitives were to be put down, considering they were given the chance to go through the legal system for their justice, and they chose to run and hide among us instead.

maybe rabid attack dogs with AIDS?

i've always like drawn and quartering.

either way, i'm too drunk and lazy to sort this out, so i'm glad that Dog is working on it.
 
2011-07-28 02:50:52 PM

Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.


/disagree

Sucks to be you more likely.
 
2011-07-28 02:51:08 PM

FarkinSneakyBastage:FarkinSneakyBastage:

/no disintegrations


"As you wish."
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2011-07-28 02:51:15 PM
My neighbor has a goat named Zuckuss

oarenj.com

oarenj.com
 
2011-07-28 02:51:22 PM

Underabridge: AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.

I got one!


Great kid. Now don't get cocky.
 
2011-07-28 02:52:14 PM

astralvortex: A must read for the star wars geek:

[i43.tower.com image 200x332]

IG-88: Think skynet with a body.


He was a real biatch in the N64 game. I beat him eventually.
 
2011-07-28 02:52:16 PM

Underabridge: Agent Smiths Laugh: ArtosRC: AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.

The name didn't give it away, it seems.

/notsureifserious.jpg

Unless, of course, AverageAmericanGuy was quite subtly counter-trolling, in which case his was a masterful act of subterfuge.

Um no.


www.myfacewhen.net
 
2011-07-28 02:54:30 PM

ha-ha-guy: The fact that this guy can legally do what he does is just plain depressing.


Ya know what's even MORE depressing? Millions of Americans ADMIRE brain-dead tough guy hillbilly morons like this asshole.
 
2011-07-28 02:55:02 PM

JohnAnnArbor: Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

Your nerd card is hereby revoked.


Agreed. Not only is it canon, but its canon from the original trilogy, and the best movie of it at that.
 
2011-07-28 02:55:47 PM

ShadowkahnCRX: Underabridge: AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.

I got one!

Great kid. Now don't get cocky penisy.


FTFPeter
 
2011-07-28 02:56:15 PM
I think you guys are missing the bigger picture... Score one for the war against drugs!
 
2011-07-28 02:56:59 PM
Go with Christ, brah.
 
2011-07-28 02:57:23 PM

Siniclinic: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

/disagree

Sucks to be you more likely.


i7.photobucket.com
 
2011-07-28 02:57:29 PM

astralvortex: A must read for the star wars geek:

[i43.tower.com image 200x332]

IG-88: Think skynet with a body.


Awesome book. Some will argue its canon status, mostly those who want to dispute Fetts return from Sarlacc.
 
2011-07-28 03:01:45 PM

Sultan Of Herf: astralvortex: A must read for the star wars geek:

[i43.tower.com image 200x332]

IG-88: Think skynet with a body.

Awesome book. Some will argue its canon status, mostly those who want to dispute Fetts return from Sarlacc.


Fett tested well in focus groups, so Lucas decided to insert more Fett into all movies that previously contained not enough Fett.
 
2011-07-28 03:01:52 PM

bhcompy: Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

[images.wikia.com image 640x480]


images.wikia.com

I gotta say, the architect made some mighty unfortunate decisions here in regards to working space.

Who wants to be in a pit immediately BELOW the walking area? I mean, people walking by are gonna kick bits of dirt on you day in and day out.

And there's no railing. Granted, this is a mistake throughout Imperial architecture, but here people are gonna be turning around and missteping right into your pit all the freakin' time. It's gotta be hard enough working under Vader, but when you're LITERALLY under Vader, and he's falling on your head every week, well, Workman's Comp only covers so much here. Unforeseen problems are one thing, but when you can FORESEE a hulking Sith Lord in black armor falling on your head and yet can't SAY anything about it, you really gotta think how your career choices brought you here.
 
2011-07-28 03:02:57 PM
I was expecting to come in here and see a bunch of people posting caps of the South Park episode. Instead it's a big nerd fight about Star Trek canon. Fark, you're not always predictable.
 
2011-07-28 03:03:34 PM

Optimal_Illusion: Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are blah blah characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe blah blah blah it

No disintergrations! (new window)


img803.imageshack.us
 
2011-07-28 03:04:36 PM

DamienC: They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.

/still have all the action figures somewhere...


The Empire didn't believe in guard rails, did it?

Shame, too, consider that allowed both Luke's escape and the Emperor's demise.
 
2011-07-28 03:07:22 PM

This text is now purple: DamienC: They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.

/still have all the action figures somewhere...

The Empire didn't believe in guard rails, did it?

Shame, too, consider that allowed both Luke's escape and the Emperor's demise.


They solved it by Return,...Vader did have to pick the farker up and throw him over....
 
2011-07-28 03:08:11 PM
images3.wikia.nocookie.net

NO pepper spray!
 
2011-07-28 03:08:42 PM
*SIGH* I read Duane Chapman's aka Dog the Bounty Hunters Biography a few years back

It was well written and interesting for a biography about a bounty hunter. Duane has had problems with drugs his whole life and has struggled to stay clean which is kind of sad. Basically he got into bounty hunting because a judge told Duane who was standing trial for some petty crime to go get this guy who skipped bail. Duane caught the guy in about a day or so and got off the hook for whatever dumb thing it was he did plus he got paid by the court for getting the guy.

Best part of the book is when Dog goes to Mexico to hunt the rich cosmetics heir/rapist whose name I'm too lazy to look up. This guy was slipping roofies(?) to women he picked up in bars and was videotaping the women as he raped them. He was arrested but jumped bail. He made it to Mexico with the help of his rich family who set him up in a pretty nice villa. Duane tracked the guy down and set up a pretty elaborate sting to get the guy. He managed to catch the guy but got arrested by the Mexican police and basically paid a bribe/bail money in order to get out of prison and to flee the country. He still managed to capture the rich cosmetics heir/rapist again and the dude is rotting in prison because of Duane "Dog" Chapman. Which makes the Dog an okay person in my opinion even though he is pretty white trashy.

Duane's a convicted felon so he can't carry or own a firearm but can carry pepperspray. He does use it pretty liberally when he captures people who resist even the slightess. Watch his show if you don't believe me! Mostly he arrests junkies who are captured at one of two places: their mom's house or their girlfriends. Pretty much every guy that gets captured is captured wearing a wifebeater shirt for some bizarre reason.

The whole "Ya gotta get with Jesus, Bra!" lectures he gives to these 'iceheads' when he brings them in are kind of messed up. I think he genuinely cares but it seems kind of stages and superficial. Southpark had an episode where Cartman dressed up as Dog and the mannerisms and the way he talked were exactly like Duane.

The whole feathered mullet, armband/jewelry, black leather thing is just too funny sometimes. For a tough guy that gets into a lot of physical confrontations you would think he would know not to wear anything loose that can be grabbed such as long hair, jewelry, loose clothes etc. Plus, don't you want to blend in not stick out if you are tracking someone. Why drive an expensive SUV to a slum? Drive something that fits the neighborhood and dress to blend like an undercover cop would.
 
2011-07-28 03:14:14 PM

Foreground My Ass: Optimal_Illusion: Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are blah blah characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe blah blah blah it

No disintergrations! (new window)

[img803.imageshack.us image 640x480]


When it diintergrates, brother, it Disintergrates!

/well, whaddyaknow, it disintergrated.
 
2011-07-28 03:17:23 PM

Foreground My Ass: This text is now purple: DamienC: They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.

/still have all the action figures somewhere...

The Empire didn't believe in guard rails, did it?

Shame, too, consider that allowed both Luke's escape and the Emperor's demise.

They solved it by Return,...Vader did have to pick the farker up and throw him over....


But why put your "office" beside a bottomless pit to begin with? The air conditioning situation alone must be terrible. There's no way to control the temp with the updraft/downdraft of a HUGE BOTTOMLESS PIT right there.

t3.gstatic.com

These poor guys had the worst situation for railings. Ain't a lot of clearance here. You push yourself away from the bench to go to the can and you could slip right off. And there's a 15-ft diameter DEATH RAY BEAM right behind you. Dear god, why??? Was a windowed control room too much to ask? Is industrial control technology not advanced enough in the future that you can't pull the firing lever for the giant superlaser from a location other than BESIDE THE FREAKIN BEAM PATH??
 
mhd
2011-07-28 03:18:05 PM
i.imgur.com

/Named a server "dengar", nobody got it
//sad, considering that we have a yoda, obiwan, jarjar...
 
GBB
2011-07-28 03:18:34 PM

Oznog: bhcompy: Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

[images.wikia.com image 640x480]

[images.wikia.com image 640x480]

I gotta say, the architect made some mighty unfortunate decisions here in regards to working space.

Who wants to be in a pit immediately BELOW the walking area? I mean, people walking by are gonna kick bits of dirt on you day in and day out.

And there's no railing. Granted, this is a mistake throughout Imperial architecture, but here people are gonna be turning around and missteping right into your pit all the freakin' time. It's gotta be hard enough working under Vader, but when you're LITERALLY under Vader, and he's falling on your head every week, well, Workman's Comp only covers so much here. Unforeseen problems are one thing, but when you can FORESEE a hulking Sith Lord in black armor falling on your head and yet can't SAY anything about it, you really gotta think how your career choices brought you here.


3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2011-07-28 03:18:44 PM

JohnAnnArbor: Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

Your nerd card is hereby revoked.


Yeah! Get off the Internet! Tell your mom that you're coming upstairs.
 
2011-07-28 03:21:01 PM

Oznog: Foreground My Ass: This text is now purple: DamienC: They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.

/still have all the action figures somewhere...

The Empire didn't believe in guard rails, did it?

Shame, too, consider that allowed both Luke's escape and the Emperor's demise.

They solved it by Return,...Vader did have to pick the farker up and throw him over....

But why put your "office" beside a bottomless pit to begin with? The air conditioning situation alone must be terrible. There's no way to control the temp with the updraft/downdraft of a HUGE BOTTOMLESS PIT right there.

[t3.gstatic.com image 342x147]

These poor guys had the worst situation for railings. Ain't a lot of clearance here. You push yourself away from the bench to go to the can and you could slip right off. And there's a 15-ft diameter DEATH RAY BEAM right behind you. Dear god, why??? Was a windowed control room too much to ask? Is industrial control technology not advanced enough in the future that you can't pull the firing lever for the giant superlaser from a location other than BESIDE THE FREAKIN BEAM PATH??


Osha would be PISSED.
 
2011-07-28 03:23:40 PM
It's the law, brah.

i.imgur.com
 
2011-07-28 03:24:10 PM

astralvortex: A must read for the star wars geek:

[i43.tower.com image 200x332]

IG-88: Think skynet with a body.


Nothing with Kevin J. Anderson is a must-read. They're must-burns.

I'll never forgive him for furthering the ruination of Frank Herbert's legacy. Kevin Anderson and Frank Herbert's bastard son should be forced to watch the StarWars prequel trilogy in a loop with their eyes taped open until they swear never to write fanfiction and pretend it's literature again.
 
2011-07-28 03:25:24 PM

Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.


Say that to my face.
 
2011-07-28 03:28:37 PM

Hyppy: Lexx: //extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

Oh, and "canon" is defined as Lucasfilm as "the screenplays, the films, the radio dramas and the novelizations." So yeah, there's that, too...


What about the Christmas special and the two Ewoks "movies"?
 
GBB
2011-07-28 03:30:24 PM

Oznog: Foreground My Ass: This text is now purple: DamienC: They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.

/still have all the action figures somewhere...

The Empire didn't believe in guard rails, did it?

Shame, too, consider that allowed both Luke's escape and the Emperor's demise.

They solved it by Return,...Vader did have to pick the farker up and throw him over....

But why put your "office" beside a bottomless pit to begin with? The air conditioning situation alone must be terrible. There's no way to control the temp with the updraft/downdraft of a HUGE BOTTOMLESS PIT right there.

[t3.gstatic.com image 342x147]

These poor guys had the worst situation for railings. Ain't a lot of clearance here. You push yourself away from the bench to go to the can and you could slip right off. And there's a 15-ft diameter DEATH RAY BEAM right behind you. Dear god, why??? Was a windowed control room too much to ask? Is industrial control technology not advanced enough in the future that you can't pull the firing lever for the giant superlaser from a location other than BESIDE THE FREAKIN BEAM PATH??


Come on! That whole galaxy is OSHA's worst nightmare. Flying/hovering cars, children piloting 500mph carts tethered to Boeing jet engines, unregulated plasma swords... Don't even get me started on their views of cloning for the sole purpose of sending them to die in battle.

Although, their technical abilities and uniform protocols are highly desirable. Seriously, could you imagine putting together your own sentient AI bot with scrap parts?? How about taking the head of that bot and swapping it out for the head of a bot developed by the military and not needing any adapters: just plug-and-play!! Not to mention their astounding work in cybernetic implants limb replacement. Everything was hot-swappable. Communication codecs that work with just about every device in existence. I could go on.
 
2011-07-28 03:35:10 PM

MythDragon: Hyppy: Lexx: //extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

Oh, and "canon" is defined as Lucasfilm as "the screenplays, the films, the radio dramas and the novelizations." So yeah, there's that, too...

What about the Christmas special and the two Ewoks "movies"?


I'm just quoting the comment from Lucasfilm. Take it up with them if you want to mince words.
 
2011-07-28 03:46:45 PM

I am Wee Todd Ed: *SIGH* I read Duane Chapman's aka Dog the Bounty Hunters Biography a few years back

It was well written and interesting for a biography about a bounty hunter. Duane has had problems with drugs his whole life and has struggled to stay clean which is kind of sad. Basically he got into bounty hunting because a judge told Duane who was standing trial for some petty crime to go get this guy who skipped bail. Duane caught the guy in about a day or so and got off the hook for whatever dumb thing it was he did plus he got paid by the court for getting the guy.

Best part of the book is when Dog goes to Mexico to hunt the rich cosmetics heir/rapist whose name I'm too lazy to look up. This guy was slipping roofies(?) to women he picked up in bars and was videotaping the women as he raped them. He was arrested but jumped bail. He made it to Mexico with the help of his rich family who set him up in a pretty nice villa. Duane tracked the guy down and set up a pretty elaborate sting to get the guy. He managed to catch the guy but got arrested by the Mexican police and basically paid a bribe/bail money in order to get out of prison and to flee the country. He still managed to capture the rich cosmetics heir/rapist again and the dude is rotting in prison because of Duane "Dog" Chapman. Which makes the Dog an okay person in my opinion even though he is pretty white trashy.

Duane's a convicted felon so he can't carry or own a firearm but can carry pepperspray. He does use it pretty liberally when he captures people who resist even the slightess. Watch his show if you don't believe me! Mostly he arrests junkies who are captured at one of two places: their mom's house or their girlfriends. Pretty much every guy that gets captured is captured wearing a wifebeater shirt for some bizarre reason.

The whole "Ya gotta get with Jesus, Bra!" lectures he gives to these 'iceheads' when he brings them in are kind of messed up. I think he genuinely cares but it seems kind of stages and superficial. Southpark had an episode where Cartman dressed up as Dog and the mannerisms and the way he talked were exactly like Duane.

The whole feathered mullet, armband/jewelry, black leather thing is just too funny sometimes. For a tough guy that gets into a lot of physical confrontations you would think he would know not to wear anything loose that can be grabbed such as long hair, jewelry, loose clothes etc. Plus, don't you want to blend in not stick out if you are tracking someone. Why drive an expensive SUV to a slum? Drive something that fits the neighborhood and dress to blend like an undercover cop would.


Andrew Luster was the Max Factor heir. Dog himself got busted for "kidnapping" him in Mexico because Mexico doesn't allow non-LEO civilians to "bounty hunt" others. They biatched that they were already "closing in" on Luster and Dog ran in ahead of them, jeopardizing their investigation. Or, you could believe Luster was using some of that $3.1M trust fund to buy off the local cops.

Once his show became popular, I have no doubt people were signing up with his bondsman and skipping bail just to get on the show. And Dog knew that, too. But the show made bank either way.
 
2011-07-28 03:47:05 PM

ArtosRC: Teen Wolf Blitzer: Eh, if I know AAG like I think I do, he was probably just counter-trolling you.

This. You let them make the mistake and dig themselves deeper; in the event of a counter-troll, you either counter-counter-troll...


images5.cpcache.com
You do NOT want to get into a trolling match with Jiro Nishi.

Cisco: But what happens if someone tries to counter your troll?
Gump:Yo yo yo, that's why I gots this Troll Counter COUNTER. See, when the mother-farker tries to counter your troll with a troll counter. This mother-farker is gonna counter the mother-farking troll counter that's counterin' your... uh...
Cisco: Troll!
(too bad Jiro has a troll counter counter counter...)
 
2011-07-28 03:50:15 PM

MythDragon: Hyppy: Lexx: //extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

Oh, and "canon" is defined as Lucasfilm as "the screenplays, the films, the radio dramas and the novelizations." So yeah, there's that, too...

What about the Christmas special and the two Ewoks "movies"?



I'm picturing Harvey Korman for some reason. Was he in...a....Star Wars Christmas special?
Or, perhaps some neurons are getting crossed here....
 
2011-07-28 03:58:30 PM

Oznog: Foreground My Ass: This text is now purple: DamienC: They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.

/still have all the action figures somewhere...

The Empire didn't believe in guard rails, did it?

Shame, too, consider that allowed both Luke's escape and the Emperor's demise.

They solved it by Return,...Vader did have to pick the farker up and throw him over....

But why put your "office" beside a bottomless pit to begin with? The air conditioning situation alone must be terrible. There's no way to control the temp with the updraft/downdraft of a HUGE BOTTOMLESS PIT right there.



These poor guys had the worst situation for railings. Ain't a lot of clearance here. You push yourself away from the bench to go to the can and you could slip right off. And there's a 15-ft diameter DEATH RAY BEAM right behind you. Dear god, why??? Was a windowed control room too much to ask? Is industrial control technology not advanced enough in the future that you can't pull the firing lever for the giant superlaser from a location other than BESIDE THE FREAKIN BEAM PATH??


If they had guard rails they would be leaning all day.


/but that won't matter when they become famous musicians
 
2011-07-28 03:59:46 PM
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2011-07-28 04:05:07 PM

farscape: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

Say that to my face.


that to my face.
 
2011-07-28 04:05:53 PM
Andrew Luster was the Max Factor heir. Dog himself got busted for "kidnapping" him in Mexico because Mexico doesn't allow non-LEO civilians to "bounty hunt" others. They biatched that they were already "closing in" on Luster and Dog ran in ahead of them, jeopardizing their investigation. Or, you could believe Luster was using some of that $3.1M trust fund to buy off the local cops.

Once his show became popular, I have no doubt people were signing up with his bondsman and skipping bail just to get on the show. And Dog knew that, too. But the show made bank either way.


Yeah, Dog has definately made a ton of money from his show. But he does have something like a dozen kids, kind of like that guy from the opening of "Idiocracy" to feed. Plus, a ton of grandkids and extended family to support.

I think he's also willing to act as a bail bondsman for people who other bondsmen won't bail and has the capitol to bail out high dollar individuals. I won't pretend I understand the bailbond business but I think you have to have a lot of capitol and experience to be even somewhat successful. Other than Dog's reality show and "Jackie Brown" Taratino movie I know nothing.

/Dog was once a door-to-door vacuum salesman and won some kind of award for being the best vacuumseller in his region. I remember reading that and always thought it was kind of funny.

//Before he was famous he got to meet motivational speaker Tony Robbins who I think gave him the idea of making a reality show out of his bounty hunting business.

///I still don't understand how an ex-felon can get a Bail Bondsman license?!?
 
2011-07-28 04:11:16 PM
No pix of Beth's huge rack? Tsk, tsk.
 
2011-07-28 04:11:41 PM

ha-ha-guy: The fact that this guy can legally do what he does is just plain depressing.


He's a convicted felon, so at least he can't carry real guns.


Bear mace that guy! And that guy! (that ep of South Park, new window)
 
2011-07-28 04:12:48 PM
We don't need their scum...
 
2011-07-28 04:26:32 PM

Kalashinator: ha-ha-guy: The fact that this guy can legally do what he does is just plain depressing.

He's a convicted felon, so at least he can't carry real guns.


Bear mace that guy! And that guy! (that ep of South Park, new window)


Depending on state regulations he may not be allowed to anyways while bounty hunting.
 
2011-07-28 04:32:02 PM

Oznog: Foreground My Ass: This text is now purple: DamienC: They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.

/still have all the action figures somewhere...

The Empire didn't believe in guard rails, did it?

Shame, too, consider that allowed both Luke's escape and the Emperor's demise.

They solved it by Return,...Vader did have to pick the farker up and throw him over....

But why put your "office" beside a bottomless pit to begin with? The air conditioning situation alone must be terrible. There's no way to control the temp with the updraft/downdraft of a HUGE BOTTOMLESS PIT right there.

[t3.gstatic.com image 342x147]

These poor guys had the worst situation for railings. Ain't a lot of clearance here. You push yourself away from the bench to go to the can and you could slip right off. And there's a 15-ft diameter DEATH RAY BEAM right behind you. Dear god, why??? Was a windowed control room too much to ask? Is industrial control technology not advanced enough in the future that you can't pull the firing lever for the giant superlaser from a location other than BESIDE THE FREAKIN BEAM PATH??


But they're not in the future! It all happened a long time ago.........
 
2011-07-28 04:45:36 PM
I just want to congratulate Lexx on one of the best geek trolls I've seen here in a while.
 
2011-07-28 05:10:10 PM

ha-ha-guy: The fact that this guy can legally do what he does is just plain depressing.


Chase people who jump bail?
 
2011-07-28 05:31:11 PM

demidog: I just want to congratulate Lexx on one of the best geek trolls I've seen here in a while.


I actually don't think he was trolling. I can see his point with the Dune reference. Just someone who takes his sci-fi to the nth degree. I have only read up to God emperor of Dune but I have heard how horrible any non-Frank Herbert Dune is.

Regarding the criticism of the bounty hunter novel, same can be applied to the Cantina novel, it is nothing but short stories on characters that didn't and wasn't supposed to be fleshed out (with the exception of a few). Just the looks and cool names of the background characters inspired imagination of every kid who was a Star Wars fan. Well, after seeing the movies 20-30 times a piece, I welcome someone adding greater depth to the trilogy with his own artistic license. I can see a purist not wanting anything but the original creator adding to "his" universe.

Either my assumption is correct or Lexx is George Lucas's fark handle. Damn that megalomaniac troll so much...
 
2011-07-28 05:55:17 PM
This...

farscape: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

Say that to my face.


and this...

SithLord: We don't need their scum...


are made all the better by the Fark handle involved.

/Tales of the Bounty Hunters was awesome
//IG-88 rulez
 
2011-07-28 05:58:26 PM

astralvortex: demidog: I just want to congratulate Lexx on one of the best geek trolls I've seen here in a while.

I actually don't think he was trolling. I can see his point with the Dune reference. Just someone who takes his sci-fi to the nth degree. I have only read up to God emperor of Dune but I have heard how horrible any non-Frank Herbert Dune is.

Regarding the criticism of the bounty hunter novel, same can be applied to the Cantina novel, it is nothing but short stories on characters that didn't and wasn't supposed to be fleshed out (with the exception of a few). Just the looks and cool names of the background characters inspired imagination of every kid who was a Star Wars fan. Well, after seeing the movies 20-30 times a piece, I welcome someone adding greater depth to the trilogy with his own artistic license. I can see a purist not wanting anything but the original creator adding to "his" universe.

Either my assumption is correct or Lexx is George Lucas's fark handle. Damn that megalomaniac troll so much...


I disagree. I would argue that anyone who's enough of a Star Wars fan to even know about the extended universe would also know at least some of the names of the other in-movie Bounty Hunters. Also, this sort of thing would be very similar to what I would do if I wanted to geek troll.
 
2011-07-28 05:58:46 PM

GBB: Oznog: Foreground My Ass: This text is now purple: DamienC: They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.

/still have all the action figures somewhere...

The Empire didn't believe in guard rails, did it?

Shame, too, consider that allowed both Luke's escape and the Emperor's demise.

They solved it by Return,...Vader did have to pick the farker up and throw him over....

But why put your "office" beside a bottomless pit to begin with? The air conditioning situation alone must be terrible. There's no way to control the temp with the updraft/downdraft of a HUGE BOTTOMLESS PIT right there.

[t3.gstatic.com image 342x147]

These poor guys had the worst situation for railings. Ain't a lot of clearance here. You push yourself away from the bench to go to the can and you could slip right off. And there's a 15-ft diameter DEATH RAY BEAM right behind you. Dear god, why??? Was a windowed control room too much to ask? Is industrial control technology not advanced enough in the future that you can't pull the firing lever for the giant superlaser from a location other than BESIDE THE FREAKIN BEAM PATH??


It was UNDER CONSTRUCTION! That was just a test lever to make sure of functionality. When it was done, it would have been a big double lever in the control room like the original.

They hadn't installed railings (or for that matter, floors) in many of the areas so that the hoverplatforms could move large objects between floors without using the elevators.

Come on, man! Use your imagination! It's SCIENCE fiction!

/got nothin'
 
2011-07-28 06:33:52 PM

I am Wee Todd Ed: I read Duane Chapman's aka Dog the Bounty Hunters Biography a few years back


Why would anybody willingly read anything about this ignorant meathead hillbilly retard? What could possibly so damn fascinating about this redneck asshole's life? He's nothing more than a dumbass thug.
 
2011-07-28 07:18:49 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should think before you post, you idiot.


New Meme is New.

/Dengar the Decintigrator!
 
2011-07-28 07:57:15 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Underabridge: Star Trek sucks.

The bounty hunters named in the submission title are from Star Wars, not from Star Trek. You should drthink before you post, you idiot.


FTFY
 
2011-07-28 08:08:48 PM

Lexx: I'm sorry, WHO are those other characters? I recognized Boba Fett but...

//extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it


That was the rest of the lineup in Star Wars Empire Strikes Back on the bridge of the Executor.

/So I am a nerd what of it?
//I also run a star wars RPG.
 
2011-07-28 09:35:45 PM

Oznog: Foreground My Ass: This text is now purple: DamienC: They're all bounty hunters, and most of them are on the bridge of the Executor in one scene from Empire Strikes Back. Boushh is the bounty hunter that Leia disguised herself as in Return of the Jedi.

/still have all the action figures somewhere...

The Empire didn't believe in guard rails, did it?

Shame, too, consider that allowed both Luke's escape and the Emperor's demise.

They solved it by Return,...Vader did have to pick the farker up and throw him over....

But why put your "office" beside a bottomless pit to begin with? The air conditioning situation alone must be terrible. There's no way to control the temp with the updraft/downdraft of a HUGE BOTTOMLESS PIT right there.

[t3.gstatic.com image 342x147]

These poor guys had the worst situation for railings. Ain't a lot of clearance here. You push yourself away from the bench to go to the can and you could slip right off. And there's a 15-ft diameter DEATH RAY BEAM right behind you. Dear god, why??? Was a windowed control room too much to ask? Is industrial control technology not advanced enough in the future that you can't pull the firing lever for the giant superlaser from a location other than BESIDE THE FREAKIN BEAM PATH??


I'd like to see the look on the OSHA inspectors face that gets a hold of the "Investigate the Empire for unsafe working conditions" complaint.

I have a feeling the Empire would tell them where to go with it, and OSHA would, for once, totally side on the side of the employer!

/but, if the guy goes and manages to convince Darth to fix stuff and bring it into compliance....he retires that day with full pay for the rest of his life AND pension/healthcare!
//he'd have to contend with that clanking noise coming from between his legs the rest of his life though.....
///You'd think though when you hired the engineering firm for the first death star and they made it possible to kill the thing with a shot through an exhaust port.....nevermind. "Yeah, get estimates." -Stewie as Vader
 
2011-07-28 10:31:07 PM

bidness: [i.imgur.com image 535x378]


You got that in wallpaper size?
 
2011-07-28 11:08:54 PM

probesport: My neighbor has a goat named Zuckuss


oarenj.com


DAMN!! At least warn us when you post something NSFW, jeeeeesh.

/bookmarked for the fapping.
 
2011-07-29 01:03:15 AM

Hyppy: Lexx: //extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

Oh, and "canon" is defined as Lucasfilm as "the screenplays, the films, the radio dramas and the novelizations." So yeah, there's that, too...


The Holocron (Official Canon as put forth by Lucas) is divided into 5 levels (in order of precedence): G-canon, T-canon, C-canon, S-canon, and N-canon.

G-canon is absolute canon; the movies (their most recent release), the scripts, the novelizations of the movies, the radio plays, and any statements by George Lucas himself. G-canon overrides the lower levels of canon when there is a contradiction. Within G-canon, many fans follow an unofficial progression of canonicity where the movies are the highest canon, followed by the scripts, the novelizations, and then the radio plays.

T-canon refers to the canon level comprising only the two television shows: Star Wars: The Clone Wars and the Star Wars live-action TV series. Its precedence over C-Level canon was confirmed by Chee.

C-canon is primarily composed of elements from the Expanded Universe including books, comics, and games bearing the label of Star Wars. Games and RPG sourcebooks are a special case; the stories and general background information are themselves fully C-canon, but the other elements such as character/item statistics and gameplay are, with few exceptions, N-canon.

S-canon is secondary canon; the story itself is considered non-continuity, but the non-contradicting elements are still a canon part of the Star Wars universe. This includes things like the online roleplaying game Star Wars: Galaxies and certain elements of a few N-canon stories. (This includes the Ewok movies)

N-canon is non-canon. "What-if" stories (such as stories published under the Star Wars: Infinities label), crossover appearances (such as the Star Wars character appearances in Soulcalibur IV), game statistics, and anything else directly contradicted by higher canon ends up here. N-canon is the only level that is not considered official canon by Lucasfilm. A significant amount of material that was previously C-canon was rendered N-canon by the release of Episodes I-III. (This includes the Star Wars Christmas Special)

My annotations from researching the archives and forum posts are underlined.
 
2011-07-29 01:24:07 AM

Tumunga: probesport: My neighbor has a goat named Zuckuss


[oarenj.com image 640x480]


DAMN!! At least warn us when you post something NSFW, jeeeeesh.

/bookmarked for the fapping.


Shes a hottie for sure.

Sharp knees, doe eyes looking right at you. Id fight you for a chance with that sweet little thing.


/Star wars/Trek- meh
//Goat sex- Fark Yeah
 
2011-07-29 07:03:43 AM

tgambitg: Hyppy: Lexx: //extended Star Wars universe isn't canon, so don't reference it

Oh, and "canon" is defined as Lucasfilm as "the screenplays, the films, the radio dramas and the novelizations." So yeah, there's that, too...

The Holocron (Official Canon as put forth by Lucas) is divided into 5 levels (in order of precedence): G-canon, T-canon, C-canon, S-canon, and N-canon.

G-canon is absolute canon; the movies (their most recent release), the scripts, the novelizations of the movies, the radio plays, and any statements by George Lucas himself. G-canon overrides the lower levels of canon when there is a contradiction. Within G-canon, many fans follow an unofficial progression of canonicity where the movies are the highest canon, followed by the scripts, the novelizations, and then the radio plays.

T-canon refers to the canon level comprising only the two television shows: Star Wars: The Clone Wars and the Star Wars live-action TV series. Its precedence over C-Level canon was confirmed by Chee.

C-canon is primarily composed of elements from the Expanded Universe including books, comics, and games bearing the label of Star Wars. Games and RPG sourcebooks are a special case; the stories and general background information are themselves fully C-canon, but the other elements such as character/item statistics and gameplay are, with few exceptions, N-canon.

S-canon is secondary canon; the story itself is considered non-continuity, but the non-contradicting elements are still a canon part of the Star Wars universe. This includes things like the online roleplaying game Star Wars: Galaxies and certain elements of a few N-canon stories. (This includes the Ewok movies)

N-canon is non-canon. "What-if" stories (such as stories published under the Star Wars: Infinities label), crossover appearances (such as the Star Wars character appearances in Soulcalibur IV), game statistics, and anything else directly contradicted by higher canon ends up here. N-canon is the only level that is not considered official canon by Lucasfilm. A significant amount of material that was previously C-canon was rendered N-canon by the release of Episodes I-III. (This includes the Star Wars Christmas Special)

My annotations from researching the archives and forum posts are underlined.


I assume that someone, somewhere out there, must be categorizing all of the Leia/Boba, Biggs/Chewy, and Vader/Ewok [NC][MMM] lemon fics and fanart into some sort of deranged Z-canon, as well.
 
2011-07-29 05:56:42 PM
I assume that someone, somewhere out there, must be categorizing all of the Leia/Boba, Biggs/Chewy, and Vader/Ewok [NC][MMM] lemon fics and fanart into some sort of deranged Z-canon, as well.

Would it be nicknamed Order 34?
 
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