Hey everybody, it's time for Headlines of the Week.
You might notice that this page no longer says, "Posted by Drew". We had high hopes that he'd be able to post something new every week, but that sorta went out the window pretty quick. He's been busy and I hated to keep asking him week after week if he had something new to add, so I finally just got a separate page out here that I'll populate myself, mostly with stuff about Headline of the Week and the annual Headline of the Year contest.
On that note, there are a couple of updates on Headline of the Year this year:
1) In years past, we always ran the contest in the same calendar year. In other words, the contest really just covered January 1 through whenever we got things wrapped up. It didn't make much sense to have December from the previous year in a contest for that year, but it also meant that whoever came up with awesome headlines in mid- or late December got jobbed pretty bad. So this year, the 2011 contest nominees will include December 2010. It seems fundamentally unfair to do it any other way, unless we push our contest crap until after the new year, but we like to do the press release stuff in December when all the news outlets are doing their own end-of-year wrap ups and are more likely to give us a look and link to us. They're also less busy and most of us (that aren't in retail) have more time to mess around in December.
2) Unlike years past, I'm trying desperately to get the preliminaries done first so that it isn't as much work at the end of the year. I have a lot of the Dec 2010 headlines done now, but I'm trying to get them formatted so that they're easier to read and vote for. It's not difficult, just time consuming. I expect to have at least December up later this afternoon and the others up as soon as possible. Time is holding me back, I have some analytics training in an hour or so, and also need to get cracking on questions for Friday's weird news quiz.
All three of the first quarter threads will go to TFD and I'll let the TFers vote on their favorites, and then the top 10 from each of the first three months will go to a mainpage thread in the next week or so to let the rest of you have a crack at it. Things you won't see in the mainpage thread: subtab headlines, context headlines, wordplay headlines, etc. Will get to those separately once I'm able.
3) There won't be a Parents of the Year category this year. It was just depressing as hell every year and I'd rather do a different category. Maybe best headline or weirdest story with the Florida tag. I dunno, still thinking about it.
Anyway, that's it. If you really love the Headline of the Year stuff every year and want to help, I have some relatively easy tasks that will save me a ton of time. Just shoot an email my way and I'll let you know what I need.
Enjoy, everybody.
Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2011-07-17 to Sat 2011-07-23:
"Panties Across the Bridge" campaign raises awareness for cervical cancer by stringing panties across the length of a Cincinnati bridge. Unfortunately with it being Cincinnati's population, it only took eight pairs 
Young Russian women are being urged to shed their clothes as a way of a) doesn't matter b) doesn't matter c) doesn't matter or d) all of the above 
Extreme couponers under fire. Seen taking cover behind massive stack of toothpaste and canned eel 
Man sets new record for largest tonsils, leaving previous record holder frustrated adenoid 
Casey Anthony's relatives insist they do not know where she is. Will probably report her missing after 31 days 
Lesbian couple told to stop holding hands at a gallery featuring a lesbian artist. You could cut the tension with a scissor, er... knife 
Woman tries to feed the birds, ends up feeding the worms. Which, indirectly, feeds the birds. Success 
Leaving skid marks, Texas truck driver wipes out and dumps load of toilet paper. Great Scott 
After numerous challenges to its accuracy, Nepal planning to remeasure the world's tallest mountain. Climbers wonder if this dispute about height will ever rest 
Man run over by 32,000-lb. tractor-pull sled, is expected to be released from the hospital on Sunday Sunday SUNDAY 
Woman fatally shot in New Jersey identified as Orange resident. Redundant?
Sports:
A cups beat C cups for World Cup 
Cameras catch Los Angeles Lakers' Andrew Bynum parking his BMW across two handicapped spaces. NBA refs call it the mother of all lane violations 
Plaxico Burress believes he can provide the Miami Dolphins a much-needed shot in the leg
Geek:
Researchers find women are more likely to sext than men, although it's probably because they're using both hands 
Victim of moped-jacking treated for gunshot, shame 
Archaeologists cause a minor flap by uncovering the lost city of King Labaya near the Palestinian city of Nabalus
Entertainment:
Cash Cab production company apologizes after game show taxi kills Vancouver pedestrian. Also offers $100 for guessing age/sex of victim 
Poll finds 'Jersey Shore' isn't affecting how nation views NJ. In other news, nation aready thought NJ was full of drunk, cursing guidos 
Artist Lucian Freud penises away at age 88
Politics:
Herman Cain believes the impending Muslim invasion is starting in Tennessee. Because when you think "recklessly permissive and open to outside influence," you think "Tennessee" 
Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (D-unce) claims budget discussions are being held up because Obama is black. Negotiations, please 
Six GOP candidates hold a debate on Twitter. Amazingly appropriate since Twitter has 140 characters and so does the Republican presidential race
Business:
New study shows a federal workers' job security is so great that its only primary threat is death ... usually caused by the customer they're ignoring 
Quizno's Subs may violate the terms of their loan agreement, effectively torpedoing the company's profits. It looks like Quizno's Subs might finally be... toasted 
Hot Wheels co-creator dies. Per his wishes, he will be interred in a handy carrying case
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