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(AZCentral)   Bob's not quite as happy now   (azcentral.com) divider line 57
    More: Interesting, unfair business practices, video game accessory, Monrovia, settlements  
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13881 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Jul 2011 at 11:53 AM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



57 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2011-07-23 11:51:42 AM
"Nutraceuticals"?
 
2011-07-23 11:54:55 AM
Who would admit to using this ?
 
2011-07-23 11:57:24 AM
Isn't this like the third or fourth time now?
 
2011-07-23 11:57:34 AM

rappy: Who would admit to using this ?


goteaminternet.com
 
2011-07-23 11:59:40 AM

Bunnyhat: rappy: Who would admit to using this ?

[goteaminternet.com image 300x231]


Your profile makes me happy.
 
2011-07-23 12:00:07 PM
Step # 1 - Buy Extenz to enbigganate your junk
Step # 2 - Call lawyer when it does not work
Step # 3 - Profit! (and buy a large car with the proceeds to compensate for small peener)
 
2011-07-23 12:00:31 PM
Smilin Bob was Enzyte I thought?

Same concept, different maker/brand
 
2011-07-23 12:01:21 PM

rappy: Who would admit to using this ?


mikeyounglaw.com

After some persuasion he would.
 
2011-07-23 12:01:57 PM
WHAT??!! A "diet supplement" company that preys on men's sexual insecurities via the medium of cheesy late-night cable TV commercials is guilty of violating laws related to business fraud and consumer protection?? Never say!!

/yes, guilty
//you know it, I know it, we all know it
 
2011-07-23 12:02:12 PM
How's Dick doing?
 
2011-07-23 12:02:40 PM
No, "Bob" is always happy.
farm1.static.flickr.com
 
2011-07-23 12:02:51 PM
Suckers. A fool with a small penis and his money........should have kept his money and just waved it around at the bar, that would have better results.
 
2011-07-23 12:03:08 PM
Is this going to delay my order?
 
2011-07-23 12:04:03 PM

rappy: Who would admit to using this ?


Well let's find out. At least one Farker has tried this. Who is going to sack up and tell their story? This is what Fark was created for, sharing and caring.
 
2011-07-23 12:04:11 PM
www.oelweinpolice.org

This one really works. Guaranteed results.
 
2011-07-23 12:05:04 PM

jdmac: Step # 1 - Buy Extenz to enbigganate your junk
Step # 2 - Call lawyer when it does not work
Step # 3 - Profit! (and buy a large car with the proceeds to compensate for small peener)


This.
 
2011-07-23 12:09:12 PM
If any of these products worked every trail of men's footprints would look like he was pushing a wheelbarrow.
 
2011-07-23 12:09:17 PM

jdmac: enbigganate


that seems like a perfectly cromulant words.
 
2011-07-23 12:12:51 PM
Penis went where?


www.ayushveda.com
 
2011-07-23 12:13:37 PM
Not a good idea to upset Bob.

i352.photobucket.com
 
2011-07-23 12:13:56 PM
It's obviously a scam, but they obviously made a lot of money off stupid and not-so-endowed people anyway. It's funny that they could go all those years running blatantly false advertising campaigns on national TV and scamming people right in front of the FDA & consumer protection agencies without being shut down or arrested. Goes to show that our government is toothless in its consumer protection laws.

I wonder if we're going down the China road & will be brushing our teeth with toothpaste made from toxic waste and drinking milk made out of industrial by-products... SUPER FOR YOU HEALTHY BEST NATURE MILK!!!! Can't wait to see the nascar vehicle with that ad on the hood - something with a smiling cow.
 
2011-07-23 12:14:25 PM
blogs.ocweekly.com

Let's use a guy whose first and last names are euphemisms for penises!
 
2011-07-23 12:15:28 PM
The beauty of these types of scams are that they make so much money they are happy to pay the settlements-they are still way ahead. Plus, the majority of consumers who buy "money back guarantee" products rarely follow protocol or spend the time to get their money back-

1) Sell product with lofty claims knowing full well you'll be sued
2) Amass so much money that settlements are small potato's
3) Profit!

/peepul r dum
 
2011-07-23 12:19:23 PM
Also, didn't Bob die in a boating accident?
 
2011-07-23 12:21:27 PM
STILL SMILING

t0.gstatic.com

I'll say it again-

1) Sell product with lofty claims knowing full well you'll be sued
2) Amass so much money that settlements are small potato's
3) Profit!
 
2011-07-23 12:22:12 PM

Amos Quito: This one really works. Guaranteed results.


Ouch! careful in the sunshine with this method.

/got ice?
 
2011-07-23 12:22:48 PM
Um, just so you know guys:

ENZYTE were the people using the fake-Dobbs.

Extenze was the one Ron Jeremy was pitching on late-night TV.

Though, I have to wonder: If Ron Jeremy didn't need to use the product, and wasn't a scientist...why would his word mean anything to promote it?
 
2011-07-23 12:23:30 PM

Dr. Rhetoric: jdmac: Step # 1 - Buy Extenz to enbigganate your junk
Step # 2 - Call lawyer when it does not work
Step # 3 - Profit! (and buy a large car with the proceeds to compensate for small peener)

This.


With a $1.5 million settlement only the states made anything, and it wasn't really much.
 
2011-07-23 12:43:37 PM
Odd...every time I saw one of those stupid commercials, they always used the phrase "that certain part of the male anatomy", and everyone made vague statements about "size" and "pleasure", without ever coming right out and saying "this formula will make your penis bigger". I always figured it was both to comply with the law, and to prevent a result like this. Not that I'm crying about it, mind you. These scammers deserve to suffer.

I also thought it strange that every single person they walked up to randomly on the street had not only heard of ExtenZe, they'd also used it with great results!
 
2011-07-23 12:50:10 PM
I'm still waiting for my refund....I mean, a friend of mine is waiting for his refund.
 
2011-07-23 12:51:17 PM
img829.imageshack.us

"Bob, fire him."
 
2011-07-23 12:53:54 PM
mikeyounglaw.com

There once was a pervert named Weiner,
Who had a perverted demeanor.
Forced from the Hill, for acting like Bill,
Now Congress is one weiner leaner!
 
2011-07-23 12:55:22 PM

buckler: Odd...every time I saw one of those stupid commercials, they always used the phrase "that certain part of the male anatomy", and everyone made vague statements about "size" and "pleasure", without ever coming right out and saying "this formula will make your penis bigger". I always figured it was both to comply with the law, and to prevent a result like this. Not that I'm crying about it, mind you. These scammers deserve to suffer.


That's true, they never did come right out and say "This will make your dick bigger." It was all wink wink nudge nudge, I thought for the same reason you did.

Maybe they could argue that if the guys thought that their dick was bigger, it gave them more confidence and thus, they were just like smilin' whoever, even if they actually did not have a more manly member. Case closed, everybody happy. Guys, your dick IS bigger. It was great. It's not me, it's you.
 
2011-07-23 01:07:03 PM
Bob's your uncle?
 
2011-07-23 01:13:37 PM
If that crap really worked, we would all be packing 10 inchers.
 
2011-07-23 01:14:30 PM

WTFDYW: There once was a pervert named Weiner,
Who had a perverted demeanor.
Forced from the Hill, for acting like Bill,
Now Congress is one weiner leaner!


*golf clap*
 
2011-07-23 01:17:14 PM
It's about darn time they clamped down on some of these lying ads/infomercials/paid programming scams.

Look how long it took for the law to go after those telephone psychic scams -- even AFTER several talk shows had some ex-employees on who not only admitted they were not psychics, but detailed how they were trained to sucker folks.

It's reached the point that we're being lied to so regularly by businesses that folks seem to have accepted it.

BTW. I hated 'smilin' Bob' and I hated the darn music they played in those ads.

We're the most litigious nation in the world, but folks seem to concentrate on suing the krap out of each other over petty things and these companies can get on TV and exaggerate the krap out of their lousy products, make millions and laugh all they way to the bank.
 
2011-07-23 01:45:42 PM
stuffy If that crap really worked, we would all be packing 10 inchers.

Sorry to hear you aren't. Total Fark is more than just a name.
 
2011-07-23 02:02:39 PM
michaelwitzel.com
 
2011-07-23 02:35:19 PM
kind of like the joke about the married couple watching a national geographic special on a tribe in Africa where the young men have weights tied to their penises which stretched them out to 12 inches.
husband says "maybe i should try that" and wife agrees.
after a week the wife says, "is there any progress"
husband:"well we are halfway there"
wife:"really six inches?"
husband:"no but it has turned black"
 
2011-07-23 02:45:49 PM

stuffy: If that crap really worked, we would all be packing 10 inchers.


But the sports car market would tank overnight...
 
2011-07-23 03:02:24 PM

jimmyjackfunk: kind of like the joke about the married couple watching a national geographic special on a tribe in Africa where the young men have weights tied to their penises which stretched them out to 12 inches.
husband says "maybe i should try that" and wife agrees.
after a week the wife says, "is there any progress"
husband:"well we are halfway there"
wife:"really six inches?"
husband:"no but it has turned black"


OH. MY.
 
2011-07-23 03:04:18 PM
I guess you could say they were....

(sunglasses)

penalized.

YYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH.
 
2011-07-23 03:31:38 PM

dbrunker: No, "Bob" is always happy.
[farm1.static.flickr.com image 375x500]


And he makes a million dollars every time he screws up, unlike this limp noodle.
 
2011-07-23 03:50:03 PM
If you've never read about the 2008 fraud case against Steven Warshak, the guy who ran Enzyte (the old name of Extenze), where he got nailed with 25 years in jail and a $500 MILLION judgment, check it out now. The number of different ways they were screwing over the people who were dumb enough to give them their credit card info is just staggering, not to mention all the other forms of fraud. The summary on wikipedia doesn't do it justice, you need to read the full statement of facts in the actual case.

Wiki (new window)
Appeals court decision (new window) (start on page 4 and go from there)

One of my favorites is how they required a doctor's note before you could claim that the pills didn't work and get a refund, so to get your money back you had to get a doctor to examine your dick and certify that it's still tiny.
 
2011-07-23 04:09:29 PM
Wow, I think we all knew about the difficulties people had cancelling the shipments , and the numerous credit card fraud, but they actually did all sorts of shennanigans to prevent their CC Merchant accounts from being terminated by excessive chargebacks.

Of course, people were stupid to order this crap in the first place.
 
2011-07-23 05:28:56 PM
$1.75 millions is nothing compared to the 100's of millions they probably made selling this shiat.

Its the same bullcrap as those power bracelet...they are selling hope and ignorance to build confidence and that should be illegal and I actually believe it is illegal in most parts of the world besides the US. If their claims has not been evaluated by the FDA they should not be able to sell that crap.

Finally when are the US going to get a Advertising Government Body that approves advertising commercials before they are aired? In UK you can t put bull commercials until they are reviewed and approved so that you can t claim bull like these pills without proof. That way the consumer is protected by scammers and frauds like this. It is about time advertising was regulated...and while you are at it you should not be able to advertise for pharmaceuticals products on TV.
 
2011-07-23 06:33:30 PM

Foxone: $1.75 millions is nothing compared to the 100's of millions they probably made selling this shiat.

Its the same bullcrap as those power bracelet...they are selling hope and ignorance to build confidence and that should be illegal and I actually believe it is illegal in most parts of the world besides the US. If their claims has not been evaluated by the FDA they should not be able to sell that crap.

Finally when are the US going to get a Advertising Government Body that approves advertising commercials before they are aired? In UK you can t put bull commercials until they are reviewed and approved so that you can t claim bull like these pills without proof. That way the consumer is protected by scammers and frauds like this. It is about time advertising was regulated...and while you are at it you should not be able to advertise for pharmaceuticals products on TV.


I dunno...if selling hope and ignorance is outlawed, 90% of the USA's economy would collapse overnight. From Weight Watchers, to Carnegie-style public speaking and self-help classes, the vast majority of the US' remaining 100% 'native' industries depend heavily upon a giant pile of BS. (h/t to George Carlin)
 
2011-07-23 06:58:09 PM

Foxone: $1.75 millions is nothing compared to the 100's of millions they probably made selling this shiat.

Its the same bullcrap as those power bracelet...they are selling hope and ignorance to build confidence and that should be illegal and I actually believe it is illegal in most parts of the world besides the US. If their claims has not been evaluated by the FDA they should not be able to sell that crap.

Finally when are the US going to get a Advertising Government Body that approves advertising commercials before they are aired? In UK you can t put bull commercials until they are reviewed and approved so that you can t claim bull like these pills without proof. That way the consumer is protected by scammers and frauds like this. It is about time advertising was regulated...and while you are at it you should not be able to advertise for pharmaceuticals products on TV.


You are seriously asking this?
Oh OK, Uhh (cough, snort, ahh..)

SOCIALISM!
SMALL GOVERNMENT!! NO NEW GOVERNMENT PROGRAMS!!!
GET YOUR GOVERNMENT OUT OF MY FREE MARKET!!!

/Sorry to drag politics into this.
// Now I need a shower.
 
2011-07-23 07:13:16 PM
There once was a pervert named Weiner,
Who had a perverted demeanor.
Forced from the Hill, for acting like Bill,
Now Congress is one weiner leaner!

Okay, thanks for the chuckle of the day!
 
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