A 1988 graduate of Brigham Young University, he has supported local charities and was a member of several professional associations, including local chambers of commerce, the bio for the father of four says.

Let me tell you what this is going to end up being about.

The father is gay. He is gay, gay, gay. Brigham Young couldn't beat it out of him, and being a hot-shot real estate agent couldn't fill the void either. Not even having a family.

He started going to clubs, hiding in the back along the shadows at first. But he learned quickly. Got a new haircut, some new clothes. Started moisturizing and tanning a little. Don't tell me those eyebrows aren't plucked.

But see, he's waited too long. Forty-eight years old and all he's thinking about is the friend from college. Nothing ever happened of course, but it could have...just maybe. He's looking at all the people half his age, gaping at the fantasy he has held in private for decades. And those people don't want anything to do with a 48 year-old closet case.

But some of them like money. And some of them like drugs even more.

Once he figures that out, it is a short and expensive and soul-crushing ride to the point where you are picking up bags of meth wrapped in bargain brand cat food from your local post office.

The All-Powerful Atheismo: we prefer harder drugs.

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i lol'd and you owe me a beer and a keyboard

Baxter!

Solar Plexus!: Okay, here's what I don't get.

FTA: The package came from Arizona and it was addressed to someone in Washington D.C. But the addressee wasn't expecting it...At one point during the investigation, Morris called the title company to ask whether the package had been delivered.

So, Morris was the one who sent it, and he got the address wrong? But it came from Arizona and was sent to D.C., and Morris lives in Florida...

Apparently my cold-addled brain can't wrap itself around this.

Let me help:

1. Morris's source is in AZ. It was the source who sent it.
2. There is a Leesburg VIRGINIA, not too far IIRC from DC.
3. The Leesburg title co got the package & handed it over to the cops.
4. Morris was expecting the package & called FedEx to see where it had gone.
5. FedEx traced the routing number and found it had accidentally gone to Virginia instead of Florida.
5a. Meanwhile, the cops had contacted FedEx and asked who was supposed to get the package.
6. When the cops got the correct address, they sent in the cops instead of a FedEx messenger and caught the dumbass dealer.

The package didn't really go to "DC" it went to Leesburg, but lazy reporters didn't want to write "Leesburg, VA, which is near Washington, DC", is my guess.

Five bucks says vartian is right.

obligatory

As if cats weren't nervous enough to begin with.

PWNtheCCP: Just had to make sure he wasn't actually Mel Gibson

Really? The Morris guy looks gayer than a leather shower cap.

Mel Gibson is just, Mel Gibson. No comparison at all.

PWNtheCCP: [media.trb.com image 408x510]
[www.digitaljournal.com image 400x500]

Just had to make sure he wasn't actually Mel Gibson

Sorta looks like henry rollins.

graduating Brigham Young U was okay. nite classes at The School of Cleft Chin led him down the wrong path.

/damn you, continuing education units

Wow.. a whole 1/8 kilo of meth..

Gyrfalcon: Solar Plexus!:

The package didn't really go to "DC" it went to Leesburg, but lazy reporters didn't want to write "Leesburg, VA, which is near Washington, DC", is my guess.

The stupid headline doesn't help with the confusion.

Lake real-estate leader accused of shipping meth in Meow Mix

Receiving a package now qualifies as "shipping" it?


Peter: It's already done. I dropped them all off at Toys for Toddlers last night.

Brian: All? Peter, only only one gift was for charity, the rest were for the family.

Peter: No, the rest were from the family. Weren't they? (Pauses.) Oh crap...since when did they change the meaning of "for" to "from"?

Brian: They had a meeting about it last night.

Peter: Why wasn't I told?

Brian: They sent you a card, but it said "for Peter" on it so you must of thought it was from you, so you didn't...you know, its just easier to call you stupid.

Looks like Iggy Pop. A little bit.

vartian: [media.trb.com image 408x510]

A 1988 graduate of Brigham Young University, he has supported local charities and was a member of several professional associations, including local chambers of commerce, the bio for the father of four says.

Let me tell you what this is going to end up being about.

The father is gay. He is gay, gay, gay. Brigham Young couldn't beat it out of him, and being a hot-shot real estate agent couldn't fill the void either. Not even having a family.

He started going to clubs, hiding in the back along the shadows at first. But he learned quickly. Got a new haircut, some new clothes. Started moisturizing and tanning a little. Don't tell me those eyebrows aren't plucked.

But see, he's waited too long. Forty-eight years old and all he's thinking about is the friend from college. Nothing ever happened of course, but it could have...just maybe. He's looking at all the people half his age, gaping at the fantasy he has held in private for decades. And those people don't want anything to do with a 48 year-old closet case.

But some of them like money. And some of them like drugs even more.

Once he figures that out, it is a short and expensive and soul-crushing ride to the point where you are picking up bags of meth wrapped in bargain brand cat food from your local post office.

Right on the money.