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(Cracked)   I'm sensing this will be greenlit   (cracked.com) divider line 292
    More: Fail, news presenters, missing children, Casey Anthony  
•       •       •

40175 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jul 2011 at 3:21 PM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



292 Comments   (+0 »)
   

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2011-07-11 12:06:23 PM  
I'm sensing someone will post a picture of cucumber sandwiches.
 
2011-07-11 12:29:08 PM  
cdn-nbco.ficfiles.com

"Whoah. All this negativity is not good for my Gift."
 
2011-07-11 12:35:48 PM  
I'm sensing this will be down voted.
 
2011-07-11 12:37:14 PM  
thisweekfordinner.com
 
2011-07-11 12:55:42 PM  
I'm sensing something from one of your dead relatives...Mmmm...Mmmuh....Mmaaaauuuiiiieehhh...His name starts with an M, does that sound familiar?
 
2011-07-11 01:00:08 PM  

jaylectricity: I'm sensing something from one of your dead relatives...Mmmm...Mmmuh....Mmaaaauuuiiiieehhh...His name starts with an M, does that sound familiar?


"No? No? Okay maybe there's just an M in the name? Or maybe he liked something and said Mmm? Or wondered about something and said Hmm?"
 
2011-07-11 01:15:18 PM  

jaylectricity: I'm sensing something from one of your dead relatives...Mmmm...Mmmuh....Mmaaaauuuiiiieehhh...His name starts with an M, does that sound familiar?


Holy Crap! It's uncle Mmaaaauuuiiiieehhhnasdg.

What does he say? Does he want me to send you money?
 
2011-07-11 01:43:12 PM  
I wonder if this qualifies as "failing at failing"...
 
2011-07-11 01:46:17 PM  

thismomentinblackhistory: I'm sensing someone will post a picture of cucumber sandwiches.


What would really surprise me is if I saw a pickle sandwich.
 
2011-07-11 01:56:42 PM  
I've known several people that are into psychics, metaphysics, etc.
There are some that are truly gifted and many that are egotistical sh*tbags.
The people that seek the services usually do not want to take responsibility for their own lives.
 
2011-07-11 02:12:04 PM  
Just as a note, if as the article claims, there was "overwhelming evidence that she probably did it" it would have been really nice for the prosecution to have presented that during the trial.
 
2011-07-11 03:23:11 PM  
southparkstudios-intl.mtvnimages.com

Nya na na na na na na ... Nya na na na na na na ...
 
2011-07-11 03:24:19 PM  

AbbeySomeone: There are some that are truly gifted


really? really?

If they can hear voices of the dead, they are either lying, or mentally ill.
 
2011-07-11 03:25:48 PM  
Why are psychics not the richest people in the world?
 
2011-07-11 03:26:07 PM  

xanadian: thismomentinblackhistory: I'm sensing someone will post a picture of cucumber sandwiches.

What would really surprise me is if I saw a pickle sandwich.


Now, see, that's more of a request.
 
2011-07-11 03:27:03 PM  
A psychic once called the police to report a murder. A policeman got a warrant, picked up the psychic, and went to the abandoned home where the body was found. At that point, the policeman arrested the psychic. "If you were really psychic, you'd have known I was going to arrest you, and wouldn't have come. Since you are not psychic, you must have had something to do with this murder. Also, you need to be fat somewhere else."
 
2011-07-11 03:27:07 PM  
images.pictureshunt.com
 
2011-07-11 03:27:57 PM  
i.imgur.com

Hey guys what's going on in this thread?
 
2011-07-11 03:29:08 PM  
So where are the Fark resident ghost-hunting whackjobs?
 
2011-07-11 03:29:09 PM  

cbackous: AbbeySomeone: There are some that are truly gifted

really? really?

If they can hear voices of the dead, they are either lying, or mentally ill.


Most, I think, are simply delusional, which I guess falls under the mentally ill category. In fact, the delusional tend to use the same cold reading tools as the liars.
 
2011-07-11 03:29:24 PM  

RedEmily: Why are psychics not the richest people in the world?


Why would Warren Buffet admit that he's psychic?
 
2011-07-11 03:29:32 PM  
I have a friend that does psychic readings on the side. She said that 95% of what she does is observation, looking for subtle clues in manner of dress or behavior. The remainder is Sophisticated Wild Assed Guessing based on the clues above. She figures if she has batting average greater than 40%, she's doing good.
 
2011-07-11 03:29:50 PM  
farm4.static.flickr.com
 
2011-07-11 03:30:52 PM  

Another Government Employee: I have a friend that does psychic readings on the side. She said that 95% of what she does is observation, looking for subtle clues in manner of dress or behavior. The remainder is Sophisticated Wild Assed Guessing based on the clues above. She figures if she has batting average greater than 40%, she's doing good.


Its a great, lucrative sideline if you aren't burdened by ethics...hmmm...
 
2011-07-11 03:31:46 PM  

Another Government Employee: I have a friend that does psychic readings on the side. She said that 95% of what she does is observation, looking for subtle clues in manner of dress or behavior. The remainder is Sophisticated Wild Assed Guessing based on the clues above. She figures if she has batting average greater than 40%, she's doing good.


Is she hot?

If not, she should buried alive in a box for taking advantage of people like that.
 
2011-07-11 03:33:58 PM  
So are these psychics who divert search parties in the wrong direction ever charged with obstruction of justice?
 
2011-07-11 03:34:47 PM  
I'm surprised the article is long than the sentence "Psychics are full of sh*t."
 
2011-07-11 03:34:57 PM  
I used to manage a very busy occult bookstore, I used to attend parapsychology lectures at the USC Conference Center in Lake Arrowhead, California, and I have a great many friends who tell me that they are clairvoyant...
I've never met one psychic who could tell me what my Social Security number was, or what city I was born in, or how much change was in my pocket.
 
2011-07-11 03:35:50 PM  
If a psychic called my house on the day of my greatest grieving like that, my rage would be such that it would hopefully call my latent gift of killing people through a phone line into operation.

farking vultures.
 
2011-07-11 03:36:01 PM  

Ishkur: RedEmily: Why are psychics not the richest people in the world?

Why would Warren Buffet admit that he's psychic?


If they were psychic they could predict anything and makes millons. They don't so they aren't. Pretty easy.
 
2011-07-11 03:36:28 PM  

timujin: Just as a note, if as the article claims, there was "overwhelming evidence that she probably did it" it would have been really nice for the prosecution to have presented that during the trial.


STOP CASEY ANTHONY-ING EVERY FARKING THREAD!
 
2011-07-11 03:36:35 PM  
Silly people. Ghosts don't exist...
 
2011-07-11 03:36:40 PM  

Eddie Adams from Torrance: jaylectricity: I'm sensing something from one of your dead relatives...Mmmm...Mmmuh....Mmaaaauuuiiiieehhh...His name starts with an M, does that sound familiar?

Holy Crap! It's uncle Mmaaaauuuiiiieehhhnasdg.


Mister, if you see my uncle Mordecai, burn him! Burn him real good, ya hear?
 
2011-07-11 03:37:36 PM  
It should be perfectly legal to sucker punch a psychic every time they try to claim they are psychic. See how much longer this shiat gets put with then.
 
2011-07-11 03:37:55 PM  
"Have you seen the cats yet? Cats, lots of them, have you seen them yet?"

/I know, she wasn't really solving a crime....
 
2011-07-11 03:38:10 PM  
Hmmm, this article is really bland and boring. South Park, Family Guy and the Simpsons have done psychic nonsense to death. What can I add to get people attention. . .

Last week Casey Anthony was found innocent of murdering her 2-year-old daughter despite overwhelming evidence that she probably did it.

Ha! Perfect. I'm like an internet Nancy Grace. Now, to talk to our web programmer to embed CSS code to add some bullshiat racked adds into copy and pasting words from our website.

/seriously cracked?
//who invented this code, and how can I beat them with a pipe.
///copy and pasting adds.
 
2011-07-11 03:38:30 PM  
"I'm sensing you live near water. Do you live by the beach or a river? Or do you have a pool in your apartment complex? Or a bathtub or shower in your bathroom?"
 
2011-07-11 03:39:00 PM  

Eddie Adams from Torrance: jaylectricity: I'm sensing something from one of your dead relatives...Mmmm...Mmmuh....Mmaaaauuuiiiieehhh...His name starts with an M, does that sound familiar?

Holy Crap! It's uncle Mmaaaauuuiiiieehhhnasdg.

What does he say? Does he want me to send you money?


He says "Let me out of this box! I'm not dead yet!"
 
2011-07-11 03:39:34 PM  
Also, any police department that uses psychics during a murder investigation for any reason other than janitorial work, should be sued into forced retirement by the family of the victims.
 
2011-07-11 03:42:15 PM  

AbbeySomeone: I've known several people that are into psychics, metaphysics

, religion etc.
There are some that are truly gifted and many that are egotistical sh*tbags.
The people that seek the services usually do not want to take responsibility for their own lives.


Added for truthiness.
 
2011-07-11 03:42:18 PM  
saw this one coming

cdn.concreteloop.com

/Hey, I must be PSYCHIC
 
2011-07-11 03:42:49 PM  
I am sensing there will be trolling, one instance of BIE for one lucky farker, and a picture of Darth Vader filling up a milk jug in the ocean.
 
2011-07-11 03:42:52 PM  
I imagine being a true psychic would involve having to know and understand an infinite amount of possibilities. Like, if my child went missing, and I found the best answer of where he was and what condition he was in, there's a probability, based on my answers and following police actions, the information I gave would instantly change the course of infinite probabilities of what would happen to the child.

Or in short, I think any true psychic would go insane.
 
2011-07-11 03:42:55 PM  

seadoo2006: [southparkstudios-intl.mtvnimages.com image 480x360]

Nya na na na na na na ... Nya na na na na na na ...


came for this
 
2011-07-11 03:42:57 PM  
img847.imageshack.us

The spirits have asked me to convey this message to you. It's meaning will become clear to you in the future. Don't ask how I know this; I just do.

/I SAID "DON'T ASK," ASSHOLE!
 
2011-07-11 03:42:59 PM  
I had seen what you did there.
 
2011-07-11 03:43:56 PM  

RedEmily: Ishkur: RedEmily: Why are psychics not the richest people in the world?

Why would Warren Buffet admit that he's psychic?

If they were psychic they could predict anything and makes millons. They don't so they aren't. Pretty easy.


The smartest/richest psychics would never let on that they're psychic.

They just seem really lucky. Phil Ivey, Tom Dwan, Daniel Negreanu, for instance.
 
2011-07-11 03:44:09 PM  
I'm sensing I'm about to make a self-referencing post.

/infinite recursion complete
 
2011-07-11 03:44:26 PM  

AbbeySomeone: There are some that are truly gifted


Gifted grifters
 
2011-07-11 03:44:49 PM  
Hey! I'm psychic! I saw this article on Cracked.com earlier today, and thought, that'll be on Fark in a couple of hours.

And voila! I'm mystical! Magical! Fantastical!
 
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