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(ESPN)   France trying to make it harder for Armstrong to win the Tour de France.   (espn.go.com) divider line 53
    More: Asinine  
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4574 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Oct 2001 at 12:00 AM (12 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2001-10-27 12:04:45 AM
So? Put him up to a bigger challenge, then he can show them who's boss once again, and they'll surrender.
 
2001-10-27 12:05:55 AM
Lance will circumvent the Maginot Line.
 
2001-10-27 12:09:55 AM
Bunch of p*ssies...I wonder if the French will let him do the 2002 tour driving a Panzer.
 
2001-10-27 12:16:02 AM
Hmmm... The article says that next year's Tour will be the shortest since 1989. I guess the Frenchies forgot that a Yank won that one too!
 
2001-10-27 12:20:48 AM
My opinion....

Why punish the guy (in a manner of speaking that is) simply because he works harder at what he does? So what if he dominates in the mountains and wins the race by a week? That just means that everybody else will just will have to work harder to catch up. Don't "dumb down" a sport simply because one person sets a standard that no one else can compete with. What they're really saying with this is that they don't want the best athletes in the world to compete, just the so-so ones.
 
2001-10-27 12:22:43 AM
"We were criticized because nothing happened in the final stages," said Tour director Jean-Marie Leblanc. "The suspense will be maintained as far as possible until the finish. And then Armstrong will win again, of course. We inbred frog-eaters cannot stand against him! WE SURRENDER!"
 
2001-10-27 12:25:44 AM
who cares, he'll still win. i think it's pretty exciting to see him win no matter how quick he does it.
 
2001-10-27 12:30:57 AM
"Why punish the guy (in a manner of speaking that is) simply because he works harder at what he does? "

Because all professional sport is spectator sport. If you have no specatators, then you have no money, and with no money you have no event. If it's a predictable finish then you're boring the audience, and people will stop watching, therefore the money will stop.

Similarly with cricket - a test match goes for 5 days, but there has been talk lately that it's simply too long for people to stay interested it. Particularly with the way that Australia has been playing test matches recently, there has been quite a bit of talk of shortening the game by a day to make it more exciting. Same goes for the ODI version of the game - they don't think it's exciting enough, so they want to make it faster and more competitive.

Sure, he'll probably still win the event anyway - what does it matter to him if they switch the stages around? But at least this way, you won't know that he's going to win it for sure until the end stages.
 
2001-10-27 12:32:58 AM
If I could ride a bicycle like Lance Armstrong then I would win the race.
 
2001-10-27 12:47:33 AM
In other words they are surrendering to Lance
 
2001-10-27 12:56:03 AM
Cool, now he has even more motivation.
 
2001-10-27 12:57:13 AM
umm, they're making the course harder for everybody, it's not like they're making it harder for Armstrong and easier for everybody else. All they're doing is making the sport a little more exciting, there's nothing wrong with that.

BTW, the French have won the event 36 times, while Americans have only won it 6 times. Oh and Miguel Indurain (Spain) dominated the race in the 90's by winning 5 straight.

So, next time, please check the numbers first, before calling anybody a pussy or an inbred frog eater.
 
2001-10-27 12:58:21 AM
"Four of the six key mountain stages are scheduled for the last eight days next year..."

...And there will be lots of keys and gold coins to collect, and there are goomabas and fire flowers all over too, so Mario won't have all that easy a time of it here!
 
2001-10-27 01:17:21 AM
I agree with Hts666; the person who put this story up on Fark made it sound in a way that they are unfairly targeting Lance Armstrong. If you read the article at all or exercise a little brain power, you will realize that everyone is still riding the same course as all the other competitors; they aren't having Frenchmen go around the block a couple times and having Armstrong go to the top of farking Mt. Everest. Of course, he would probably still kick their asses. USA!
 
2001-10-27 01:30:40 AM
For Lance to come back from the type of cancer that he had is the biggest race he will ever win. The rest is just a cake walk.
 
2001-10-27 01:45:58 AM
If Lance is going to dominate, then he will dominate. It sounds to me like they change the race course a lot, so why the fark are you biatching?

"Ohh no, they will change an event that we won last year! Just to make us lose! Even though they just changed the course, and that happened before"

Please don't make me slam my head through my monitor.
 
2001-10-27 01:58:19 AM
This just in: Tour De France is boring anyway! I wish I could get into a sport about a bunch of guys riding their bike to various locations in France, but I can't. Americans generally have too short of an attention span to like things like that, as well. Of course I'd imagine their target audience is French people....

Anyway, the Iditarod kick's Tour De France's ass!
 
2001-10-27 01:59:38 AM
Of course the iditarod's target audience is elementary teachers that force their students to read about the iditarod.... it's all a delicate balance.

The only non-pussy sport is thunderball, anyway. Pussies.
 
2001-10-27 02:01:13 AM
Rollerball!
 
2001-10-27 02:12:25 AM
It's easier to just ban him from entering next year, I'm all for it.
 
2001-10-27 02:25:03 AM
We need to start a national Dodgeball or "Smear the Queer"
team to make the Olympics fun again. It'd be fun to smash
the faces of some French pussies in with a wicked
basketball or kickball slam!
 
2001-10-27 02:31:46 AM
Lance is gonna get pissed and start taking hostages until they guarantee him, and, I assume, alcohol. It's late.

~D
 
2001-10-27 02:37:47 AM
Dang it I submitted this story with a "France doesn't surrender" title, I shoulda got the post!
 
2001-10-27 02:45:43 AM
"So, next time, please check the numbers first, before calling anybody a pussy or an inbred frog eater."

Here's some numbers for you.

Number of wars won by France: 0
Number of wars won by USA: eleventy billion

France = pussies.
 
2001-10-27 03:18:40 AM
" We will FART in his general direction .... " the Frogs
 
2001-10-27 03:25:10 AM
(This is the name that will appear next to your comments)
ha.
thats a great name.
 
2001-10-27 03:40:40 AM
Im always seeing people complain on the photoshop threads that they dont have photoshop. Well I have a cracked version that i have happily used for a while now. In fact I have a cd with so much pirated Adobe and Macromedia software its a wonder they haven't broken my door down yet. Anyhow im willing to spend a bit of time to make copys and mail em out to my fellow farkers. For free! Thats only if its a resonable amount though. If more than ten people want these cd's then im gonna have to charge for the costs of cd-rs and shipping and handling :) Just sign on this thread for those who might be interested. By the way I have all te necessary registration and serial info.
 
2001-10-27 03:41:16 AM
Wrong freaking thread. shiat, my bad.
 
2001-10-27 04:28:30 AM
This is a bad idea, because it will work...

They "tiger-proofed" the masters once, and look who we got... Vijay Singh, woop-de freakin doo. Just let the dominant athlete in the sport dominate, they didn't change the rules of basketball just to keep MJ from being too good, and it did wonders for the popularity of the team and the sport.
 
2001-10-27 10:41:28 AM
Well, if they were to shorten the mountain stages and whatnot, then Armstrong really would have to work his ass off.
 
2001-10-27 10:42:56 AM
the US has only won 6 times, huh? that must be because most years we were too busy trying to protect the froggies. oh yeah, and Phineas forgot another set of numbers.....

how many times US surrendered - 0
how many times France surrendered - gee, i've lost count.
 
2001-10-27 12:12:21 PM
Every sport has done this. NASCAR changed it's rules to make it more exciting and keep the front group of elite cars together with the pack, NBA basketball changed it's rules because Charle Barlkley would back the ball in for 15 seconds and shoot or kick it out, etc. You want people in Paris partying and watching the end of the race. It is good for the sport.
 
2001-10-27 01:15:04 PM
Ok, you want to play numbers?

Number of contributions to the world of art, music, ballet, literature, architecture, or anything else cultural.

France - too many to count.
US - ummm, hot dogs?

disclaimer: i'm not bashing anybody, just having fun with numbers :)
 
2001-10-27 01:35:37 PM
Did you hear about the french man who won the Tour de France?


he did a victory lap
 
2001-10-27 01:44:55 PM
Hts, you can have your ballets and literature. Maybe if France's male population wasn't too busy prancing around in tights they could have picked up a goddamn gun and stopped the Germans. But nope, they preferred to drink wine and eat stale bread, and wait for the US soldiers to kill themselves trying to land an army on the shores of France. Thanks a lot, farkos.
 
2001-10-27 02:23:18 PM
Actualy, if you wish to play numbers:

# of Wars France Won: I can think of 2
# of wars America has lost: 2
# of Wars America has made stupid mistakes in: Umm, all?
# of times american ignorance and ego show through: Too much.
# of times I bite trolls: Too often :)
 
2001-10-27 02:49:05 PM
"Number of contributions to the world of art, music, ballet, literature, architecture, or anything else cultural.

France - too many to count.
US - ummm, hot dogs?"



Define culture.


~D
 
2001-10-27 03:50:59 PM
What are the two wins and losses?
 
2001-10-27 04:48:11 PM
Dereliction - everything you see in the sentence, also you can add folklore (including music, dance, tales), food, drink and many other things that I can't think of right now.
Btw, if you're going to name a few American writers or artists, then you don't have to. I know of many (Poe, Dreiser, Hemingway, Cooper, to name a few) but unfortunatelly they had and still have, greater popularity in Europe, specially in France, than they did here.

Fuzzmosis = intelligent person, must be Canadian :)
 
2001-10-27 04:51:48 PM
Lance Armstrong - WHAT THE HELL IS THAT LOG DOING THERE?!
TDF Official - What log?
Lance Armstrong - THAT HUGE LOG THAT IS BLOCKING THE ROAD?!
TDF Official - I don't see any log.
Lance Armstrong - WHAT DO YOU MEAN?! Wait a second. WHAT THE HELL ARE THE OTHER BIKERS DOING ON THE ROAD BENEATH THE CLIFF?!
TDF Official - What road?
Lance Armstrong - THAT ROAD!!! (pulls out map) AND THIS MAP HAS BEEN ALTERED!!
TDF Official - No it hasn't.
Lance Armstrong - OF COURSE IT HAS!!! THE ROAD IS CROSSED OUT AND ANOTHER ROAD HAS BEEN DRAWN WITH A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT COLOR!!!
TDF Official - I assure you that map is authentic.
Lance Armstrong - AND WHY ARE YOU HOLDING A GUN TO MY HEAD?!
TDF Official - (pulls trigger)
 
2001-10-27 05:07:18 PM
Number of Nazis in France thanks to USA: 0
Ungrateful French farks: millions
 
2001-10-27 07:03:47 PM
And if it wasn't for the French we'd probably still be a British colony.

Americans that don't know their own history: unfortunately too many to count.
 
2001-10-27 08:29:42 PM
Ever heard of the guy, his name was Napeleon? He liked conquering things? World War 1, France won.
1812
Vietnam.

Anything else?

Phineas: Yes, I'm sure that America single handedly saved france. Mayhaps Russia creating a 2 front war helped? British and troops from other countries? The French resistance?
 
2001-10-27 11:14:33 PM
Lance Armstrong is the shiat.

Just had to let that out...
 
2001-10-27 11:17:29 PM
What do you expect from an organizer named Jean-Marie. His name says he's ready to surrender to someone (or something)
 
2001-10-28 01:04:09 AM
ok, i have to say it, i can't hold it any longer.

his name should be Legstrong, not armstrong. i mean, his legs must be much stronger than most people's in order to ride a bike like that, right?
 
2001-10-28 01:10:20 AM
Fuzzmosis, good point, most people forget the contributions of 20 million dead Russian soldiers.
 
2001-10-28 01:10:59 AM
Phineas, shut up. Please.

Hts is right. If it wasn't for General Lafayette's intervention because Ben Franklin asked the French to help, the Brits would have won.

Just because the French surrendered in WWII you think they're idiots. Right. Well, hey, the US surrendered in Vietnam. Maybe not officially, but we pulled out. So what's that make us?
 
2001-10-28 03:43:30 AM
Coyote:
Well, you've gotta remember it was more of a "this is stupid and pointless so we're gonna pack up and go home" surrender than a "feel free to move in and raise your flag over our capital city, just please don't exterminate us all" surrender. To France's credit, of course, they did have enough badasses to put together a reasonably effective underground resistance. Just the same, there is no question at all that they'd all be heiling Hitler Junior today along with the whole rest of the world if it wasn't for the US.
 
2001-10-28 03:45:06 AM
Oh yeah, and they sell explosives to terrorists too.
 
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