FARK.com: (6310674) 300-pound basketball players lose to 7- and 13-year-olds, then pull guns on victors

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(The Macomb Daily)		300-pound basketball players lose to 7- and 13-year-olds, then pull guns on victors (macombdaily.com)		71
		More: Amusing, ferndale, McConnell v. FEC

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15002 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Jun 2011 at 12:07 PM | Favorite | share:

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TheSignPost		2011-06-20 07:37:26 AM

Is that actually 300 lbs each, or is that the teenager version of 300 lbs, i.e. "OMG that dude weighed like 300 lbs!"

Because 300 lbs is big. I don't think a 300 lb person could beat too many people at a game of pick-up.

misanthropicsob		2011-06-20 12:09:48 PM

Hrm. Ferndale, which borders Detroit. 'Nuff said.

/Stay classy.

TravisBickle62		2011-06-20 12:10:16 PM

Let's play "Guess The Race"

TravisBickle62		2011-06-20 12:10:52 PM

Nuuu		2011-06-20 12:11:02 PM

By reading the headline I actually expected to be pleasantly surprised. Like, the 300 lbs basketball players were going to be pros who were playing some kind of charity game with underprivileged youth, maybe in connection with the toys for guns program or something.

You win again, dour reality.

therealpope		2011-06-20 12:11:27 PM

"The assailants are described as black:" - Well duh.

therealpope		2011-06-20 12:12:26 PM

Artist sketch of gun man:

biomania.yolasite.com

DROxINxTHExWIND		2011-06-20 12:14:17 PM

2003 Mercury Gran Marquis

I've never seen a Mercury Gran Marquis that wasn't driven by a fat person.

zez		2011-06-20 12:15:25 PM

They caught them. Here is the mugshot

cdn.theurbandaily.com

/vote

Hypothetical Imperative		2011-06-20 12:16:54 PM

TheSignPost: Is that actually 300 lbs each, or is that the teenager version of 300 lbs, i.e. "OMG that dude weighed like 300 lbs!"

Because 300 lbs is big. I don't think a 300 lb person could beat too many people at a game of pick-up.

I like to picture 300 1-pound players swarming the court.

Sort of like Ash, but with baggy shorts.

DROxINxTHExWIND		2011-06-20 12:18:34 PM

TravisBickle62: Let's play "Guess The Race"

Ok. I guess you're an old ass white boy who wishes he were as "cool" as the fictional character played by Robert Deniro, but your mother wouldn't let you get a mohawk in '76 and the closest you've ever gotten to being a straight shooter is when your splooge goes directly into your sock and your knuckles stay clean.

/What do I win?

Savoir-Faire		2011-06-20 12:18:39 PM

TheSignPost: Is that actually 300 lbs each, or is that the teenager version of 300 lbs, i.e. "OMG that dude weighed like 300 lbs!"

Because 300 lbs is big. I don't think a 300 lb person could beat too many people at a game of pick-up.

Maybe, but the two 18 year olds got beat by a 7 and 13 year old, so there may be some truth to the size.

Police should be on the lookout for that Grand Marquis. Just look for the clapped-out suspension and there's your guys.

LaraAmber		2011-06-20 12:19:11 PM

I fail to see how having a gun pointed at a seven-year-old is "amusing".

sotua		2011-06-20 12:19:26 PM

"I know, right?"

DROxINxTHExWIND		2011-06-20 12:19:45 PM

Savoir-Faire: TheSignPost: Is that actually 300 lbs each, or is that the teenager version of 300 lbs, i.e. "OMG that dude weighed like 300 lbs!"

Because 300 lbs is big. I don't think a 300 lb person could beat too many people at a game of pick-up.

Maybe, but the two 18 year olds got beat by a 7 and 13 year old, so there may be some truth to the size.

Police should be on the lookout for that Grand Marquis. Just look for the clapped-out suspension and there's your guys.

LOL. Oh, you KNOW the suspension is farked up. but you just made every Mercury owner a suspect.

gameshowhost		2011-06-20 12:20:16 PM

TravisBickle62: Let's play "Guess The Race"

Eeny meeny miny moe

LL316		2011-06-20 12:21:46 PM

misanthropicsob: Hrm. Ferndale, which borders Detroit. 'Nuff said.

/Stay classy.

Ferndale is no relation to Detroit. It's more like San Frans gay cousin.

/NTTAWWT

udeng01		2011-06-20 12:24:05 PM

Kids today are just punks, sissified.

/win some and you lose some
//but you live to fight another day

animal900		2011-06-20 12:28:00 PM

Woodward Heights

Has there every been a street named Woodward that wasn't smack in the middle of the ghetto?

LedLawless		2011-06-20 12:28:02 PM

Honestly, after losing to a 7 year-old and a 13 year-old, they should have pulled guns and shot themselves.

kindms		2011-06-20 12:29:08 PM

they called from the street on a cell phone and neither of them got a plate # = FAIL

fluffy2097		2011-06-20 12:29:48 PM

TheSignPost: I don't think a 300 lb person could beat too many people at a game of pick-up.

Why do you think they brought a handgun?

tortilla burger		2011-06-20 12:29:57 PM

Ballin is serious bizness

hypervocal		2011-06-20 12:31:43 PM

"Nah, nah, this ain't Raymond."

Genju		2011-06-20 12:33:02 PM

gameshowhost: TravisBickle62: Let's play "Guess The Race"

Eeny meeny miny moeo

numbone		2011-06-20 12:33:12 PM

gameshowhost [TotalFark] Quote 2011-06-20 12:20:16 PM
TravisBickle62: Let's play "Guess The Race"

Since it didn't say, they were black.

DROxINxTHExWIND		2011-06-20 12:34:46 PM

kindms: they called from the street on a cell phone and neither of them got a plate # = FAIL

Farking stupid 7 year old, not thinking on his feet when a gun gets pulled on him. WTF is wrong with these kids??

probesport		2011-06-20 12:36:18 PM

TravisBickle62: TheSignPost: Is that actually 300 lbs each, or is that the teenager version of 300 lbs, i.e. "OMG that dude weighed like 300 lbs!"

Because 300 lbs is big. I don't think a 300 lb person could beat too many people at a game of pick-up.

Dude can't help it, he's Samoan.

Antoine Rockamora?

probesport		2011-06-20 12:37:24 PM

misanthropicsob: Hrm. Ferndale, which borders Detroit. 'Nuff said.

/Stay classy.

Ferndale is Fashionable, not classy. We would have also accepted Fabulous.

Rye_		2011-06-20 12:37:49 PM

DROxINxTHExWIND: TravisBickle62: Let's play "Guess The Race"

Ok. I guess you're an old ass white boy who wishes he were as "cool" as the fictional character played by Robert Deniro, but your mother wouldn't let you get a mohawk in '76 and the closest you've ever gotten to being a straight shooter is when your splooge goes directly into your sock and your knuckles stay clean.

/What do I win?

Another day's worth of rage.

SystemFault		2011-06-20 12:39:11 PM

A massive forced sterilization program for Detroit inhabitants will solve many problems in southeast Michigan.

Aidan		2011-06-20 12:39:52 PM

probesport: misanthropicsob: Hrm. Ferndale, which borders Detroit. 'Nuff said.

/Stay classy.

Ferndale is Fashionable, not classy. We would have also accepted Fabulous.

I must've missed that part of Ferndale. Mind you, I believe my only exposure to Ferndale has been the mile roads.

hammettman		2011-06-20 12:40:08 PM

LaraAmber: I fail to see how having a gun pointed at a seven-year-old is "amusing".

THIS

wtf subdude?

h3cubus		2011-06-20 12:40:17 PM

TravisBickle62: Let's play "Guess The Race"

Do we really need to?

Von_Ruff		2011-06-20 12:42:23 PM

FTFA: "The younger players, 7 and 13, told police the older teens weigh about 300 pounds each and they beat them in a game which ended about 5:20 p.m. Monday when an argument broke out."

www.lexiophiles.com

A dangling participle? Clearly the writer and editor must know the whereabouts of one Shosanna Dreyfus.

Oh_Enough_Already		2011-06-20 12:43:12 PM

therealpope: "The assailants are described as black:" - Well duh.

So "duh" that legions of newspapers across the country have made the editorial decision to redact such information and/or disable comments on any stories featuring back crime.

Because not discussing it will make it go away, of course.

MiamiChef		2011-06-20 12:43:27 PM

THIS JUST IN!!!! CHILDREN AGED 7-13 SOMETIMES LIE!!!!

probesport		2011-06-20 12:44:13 PM

hammettman: LaraAmber: I fail to see how having a gun pointed at a seven-year-old is "amusing".

THIS

wtf subdude?

Apparantly you have forgotten about this 7 year old (new window).

DaShredda		2011-06-20 12:44:45 PM

TravisBickle62: Let's play "Guess The Race"

FTFA - "The assailants are described as black"

DROxINxTHExWIND		2011-06-20 12:45:41 PM

Rye_:
Another day's worth of rage.

LOL. Sarcasm seems to play well around here most times. Even when I'm trying to be funny I'm the angry black guy. Maybe I should have done a little shuffle at the end and gave you a wide- toothed, big-eyed smile to let you know it was a joke.

DaShredda		2011-06-20 12:48:23 PM

DROxINxTHExWIND: Rye_:
Another day's worth of rage.

LOL. Sarcasm seems to play well around here most times. Even when I'm trying to be funny I'm the angry black guy. Maybe I should have done a little shuffle at the end and gave you a wide- toothed, big-eyed smile to let you know it was a joke.

+2 to Rage

Rye_		2011-06-20 12:50:32 PM

probesport		2011-06-20 12:51:31 PM

DROxINxTHExWIND		2011-06-20 12:52:17 PM

Rye_:
I'm going to need some jazz hands, too.

Of course.

Franko618		2011-06-20 12:52:57 PM

300lbs isnt big enough to get beat by a 7 and 13 year old. Unless they were 4'5". Most 7 year olds can barely get the ball over the room.

Clady		2011-06-20 12:53:35 PM

Parks and schools in Ferndale have been removing the hoops from the basketball courts at night/after school hours to keep this sort of thing from happening.