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(   Karate for Christ: Be nearer to god through violence   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
•       •       •

2376 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Oct 2001 at 12:00 AM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

40 Comments     (+0 »)
2001-10-26 12:10:17 AM  
why do i want to be nearer to God through some dude name Christ?
2001-10-26 12:12:44 AM  
Hilarious! Ninja Christians kick ass!
2001-10-26 12:13:29 AM  
Another ninja-related post from StickNinja, that makes three.
2001-10-26 12:21:14 AM  
Onward, Christian soldiers
Marching as to war
With the cross of Jesus
Going on before

(Sabine Baring-Gould)
2001-10-26 12:26:39 AM  
Im wonder how long before that quote from DeadAlive pops up in this thread
2001-10-26 12:29:19 AM  
I think an "Ironic" tag would've been more appropriate.

Wacky Christians!
2001-10-26 12:31:35 AM  
"Blessed be the Lord, my rock, my strength, and my salvation; Who trains my hands for war, and my fingers for battle"
Psalm 144:1

Sounds like jihad talk.

And, oh, God is great.
2001-10-26 12:37:10 AM  
Wasn't there some article a few days or weeks ago on how heavy-duty Christian folk opposed martial arts due to their imposing of yoga practice or some garbage like that? Something like yoga and meditation violate Christian worship?
2001-10-26 12:50:12 AM  
karate != violence

karate == self defence.
2001-10-26 12:59:34 AM  
What this needs are decent web page designers for Christ.
2001-10-26 12:59:55 AM  
Boolean expressions are not allowed in religion
2001-10-26 01:10:10 AM  
what is Jesus' middle name?
I know it starts with an H.......
2001-10-26 01:24:45 AM  
"Harold". As in, "Our father who art in heaven, Harold be thy name."
2001-10-26 01:27:14 AM  
All praise king Haaaaaarold....
2001-10-26 01:53:09 AM  
Sr. Spanish is, however, quite correct.
2001-10-26 02:20:40 AM  
Jesus was a Wujenjutsu [ninja magic] master!
His "walking on water" technique is old hat to ninja.

[image from too old to be available]

2001-10-26 02:59:49 AM  
My Amazon character in Diablo 2 is named "Jesus". Quite fitting, don't you think?
2001-10-26 03:36:13 AM  
British: "What this needs are decent web page designers for Christ."


...there has GOT to be a Jack Chick pamphlet on martial arts we can send those guys.

Jeffy: Want to go to karate class with me, Billy?

Billy: My mom told me not to.

Jeffy: Come on, Billy!

Billy: Well, OK.

(inside karate class)

Instructor: Billy, now when I try and hit you, block me like THIS. Hi- YAH!

(Instructor swings. Billy is off balance, getshiat, falls to the floor dead.)

-the next day-

Jeffy (to Billy's mom): Gee I'm sorry Billy died, but at least he's going to heaven.

Billy's Mom: I wish he were, Jeffy, but Billy's soul is going straight to hell for this...

(you remember the rest!)
2001-10-26 03:53:39 AM  
Can't... read... further...

Web... design... too... awful.. Must... shield... eyes!
2001-10-26 04:55:58 AM  
Godammit .... you people are so slow

I kick arse for the lord!
2001-10-26 05:30:07 AM  
Anyone know what it's like to love Jesus Christ and the Devil too? Do most people do whats it's like to never touch reality?
2001-10-26 06:03:55 AM  
Er... isn't Karate Buhdist in philosophy...?

Shurely shome mishtake.
2001-10-26 08:12:39 AM  
Even for Fark, that was a great headline :)
2001-10-26 08:20:31 AM  
[image from too old to be available]

Zen Buddhist philosphy does not conflict with Christianity. Most truly good christians are practising Zen anyways.
2001-10-26 08:25:46 AM  
Zen Buddhism is worshipping a false idol, shurely?
2001-10-26 09:09:06 AM  
Zen Buddhism isn't about worship. You're mixing philosophy & religion.

phi·los·o·phy (f-ls-f)
n. pl. phi·los·o·phies
Love and pursuit of wisdom by intellectual means and moral self-discipline.
Investigation of the nature, causes, or principles of reality, knowledge, or values, based on logical reasoning rather than empirical methods.
A system of thought based on or involving such inquiry: the philosophy of Hume.
The critical analysis of fundamental assumptions or beliefs.
The disciplines presented in university curriculums of science and the liberal arts, except medicine, law, and theology.
The discipline comprising logic, ethics, aesthetics, metaphysics, and epistemology.
A set of ideas or beliefs relating to a particular field or activity; an underlying theory: an original philosophy of advertising.
A system of values by which one lives: has an unusual philosophy of life.

re·li·gion (r-ljn)

Belief in and reverence for a supernatural power or powers regarded as creator and governor of the universe.
A personal or institutionalized system grounded in such belief and worship.
The life or condition of a person in a religious order.
A set of beliefs, values, and practices based on the teachings of a spiritual leader.
A cause, principle, or activity pursued with zeal or conscientious devotion.

Close, but they are not the same.

Much as Okinowan Karate is not the same as Chinese Kung Fu or Brazillian Ju-Jitsu.

They may all have kicks, but they are not the same system. Related in as much as they are martial arts.

You cannot have religion without philosophy, but you can have philosophy without religion.
2001-10-26 09:34:53 AM  
Christian Karate doesn't stand a chance against Jew Jitsu.
2001-10-26 10:35:38 AM  
Isol8d: If you're going to get all sarky and pedantic, then surely the "Love and Pursuit" aspect of philosophy should be called into question when offering a response to my challenge.
2001-10-26 10:40:34 AM  
Those kids were Kungfoo fighting, Amen
Yah, they were fast as lightning, Praise God
In fact it was a little bit frightening, Hallelujah
2001-10-26 10:49:49 AM  
I clicked where it says "click if you love Jesus," and I don't love Jesus! MAUAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHA!
2001-10-26 11:32:33 AM  
DrinkyCrow13: You're going to hell for that one. I'll come too for laughing. Let's get a drink.
2001-10-26 11:33:49 AM  
What the hell is the picture of the lion for?
2001-10-26 11:38:18 AM  
crouching moses, hidden jesus
2001-10-26 11:41:49 AM  
Karate (if it's actually Karate and not just using the term to blanket all martial arts, which happens way too often), is like all martial arts that I've ever seen/read about, based on meditation and finding inner balance. It's also about good health and being able to protect yourself, not just through actions, but also how you present yourself.

The meditation part is questioned by some christian faiths, but I have a friend who is catholic and practices meditation. Meditation has nothing to do with any specific religion, but instead, finding an inner peace and learning to keep the mind and body balanced in every day life.

I studied TaeKwonDo for 10 years, and the only reason I don't right now is that I have not found a school that teaches ITF TKD in the Cleveland area. Originally I was worried about the meditation, being a methodist and hearing that such things were against christianity, but I agree with Isol8d, don't confuse philosophy with religion. Meditating once or twice does not make you a buddhist and does not cause you to worship false idols(which I understand is a complete misenterpretation if Buddhist faith).
2001-10-26 12:39:25 PM  
Great selling item for recruiting people to the local dojo. "With Christ on your side, you'll never loose another tournament!" us....
2001-10-26 01:24:37 PM  
I'm sorry, I'm a Christian and I think this organization is slightly unnecessary. It is a beef I have with the church. All the stupid organizations that come about in the name of God: Surfers for Christ, Karate for Christ, Recovering Crack Addicts for Christ, etc.
2001-10-26 02:13:45 PM  
I'm not a Christian, but I am a member of Crack Addicts for Christ.
2001-10-26 02:38:33 PM  
The instructor's name is Joseph Lumpkin. Isn't a "lumpkin" what you call it when you get a blow job on the toilet?

Oh, wait... that's a "BLUMPKIN"
2001-10-26 04:14:45 PM  
Karate is not violence
2001-10-26 05:37:09 PM  

My favorite is Jews for Christ. Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
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